Parent Pause

with Kim McCabe (because a pause is not a luxury)
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Become a less stressed parent in minutes kimmccabe.substack.com

  1. The best thing we can teach our children about endings

    há 2 dias

    The best thing we can teach our children about endings

    What if we’re so busy helping our children move on that we’re forgetting to help them say goodbye? We spend so much time celebrating firsts, but life’s deepest lessons are often found in the lasts. In this Parent Pause, I’m reflecting on why good endings matter, what one girl in a Girls Journeying Together group taught me about saying goodbye, and why making space for tears might be one of the greatest gifts we can give our children. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    4 min
  2. Missing it doesn’t mean you want it back

    há 4 dias

    Missing it doesn’t mean you want it back

    Have you ever found yourself missing a stage of your child’s life that you wouldn’t actually want back? I’ve been wondering whether we’ve misunderstood what it means to miss something. We often assume sadness means we want to go backwards. I don’t think it does. In this Parent Pause, I’m reflecting on why joy and grief can exist side by side, what our children’s sadness might really be telling us, and why learning to honour what we’ve loved can help us move more freely into what’s next. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    4 min
  3. What if the problem isn’t change? Might it be that we don’t stop to say goodbye

    há 5 dias

    What if the problem isn’t change? Might it be that we don’t stop to say goodbye

    What if those tears over an old school jumper, a pair of scuffed shoes or the end of another school year aren’t silly at all? I wonder if we’ve become so focused on helping our children look forward that we’ve forgotten how important it is to stop and notice what’s ending. In this Parent Pause, I’m thinking about good endings, why they matter just as much as good beginnings, and how taking a moment to acknowledge what we’ll miss might help both us and our children move into what’s next. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    6 min
  4. Before you ask “are you ready?” Ask this instead

    19 de jun.

    Before you ask “are you ready?” Ask this instead

    Adults can become slightly obsessed with readiness at this time of year. Ready for secondary school. Ready for more independence. Ready for change. But children aren’t a conveyor belt. I think we underestimate how much children grieve transitions - even positive ones. They lose classrooms, teachers, rhythms, friendship dynamics, familiarity, identity. Even moving up one school year changes a child’s ecosystem. And perhaps confidence doesn’t come only from looking ahead bravely. Perhaps it also comes from being able to look back and think: “I belonged there.” “I survived that.” “I changed this year.” Children build identity through being witnessed. So before we rush them toward what’s next, perhaps we pause long enough to notice who they’ve been this year first. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    4 min
  5. The end of the school year is not a performance

    17 de jun.

    The end of the school year is not a performance

    I think some children are crawling towards the end of term absolutely exhausted by how much “fun” we’re trying to squeeze in. Dress-up day. Sports day. Water fight. Leavers’ assembly. Reward trip. Barbecue. Transition day. Party day. By July, some children aren’t celebrating anymore - they’re surviving. Many children spend the end of term performing happiness while privately feeling overstimulated, emotional, uncertain or simply worn out. And we parents can get swept into that frenzy too. But perhaps children don’t need spectacular endings. Perhaps they need digestible ones. A slower evening, a conversation in the garden, an early night. The quieter moments are often the ones that stay with them anyway. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    4 min
  6. Don’t rush your child out of this school year

    15 de jun.

    Don’t rush your child out of this school year

    Every July we start rushing children towards the next thing - new schools, new uniforms, new routines - while they’re often still emotionally living inside this school year. A girl said something quietly heartbreaking to me recently:“No one’s asking me if I’m sad.” I think children need help not only preparing for what’s next, but noticing what mattered about what’s ending. The end of term can become such a blur of sports days, assemblies and exhaustion that we forget to pause long enough for meaning to catch up. Sometimes the most powerful thing we can offer is not preparation, but presence. A hot chocolate.A slower conversation.A moment to notice who they’ve become this year. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    4 min
  7. ‘Mature for their age’ is that a good thing?

    12 de jun.

    ‘Mature for their age’ is that a good thing?

    The child everyone praises is sometimes the child I’m quietly worried about. You know the one - sensible, helpful, mature for their age and never any trouble. Adults love these children. I know because I used to work with one. She was thoughtful, responsible and always thinking about everyone else. But when I asked her a simple question - “What would you like?” - she couldn’t answer. Not because she was shy. Because she’d become so good at noticing everyone else’s needs that she’d lost touch with her own. In this week’s Parent Pause, I’m exploring the difference between maturity and parentification. Between a child growing into responsibility and a child carrying burdens that don’t belong to them. Here’s the troubling thing: children who are carrying too much often don’t look troubled. They often look successful. And perhaps that’s the question worth asking: Does this child have somewhere they get to be small? Somewhere they don’t have to hold it all together. Somewhere they can be cared for instead of caring for everyone else. Every child needs that. Perhaps especially the ones who seem not to. Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    3 min
  8. A chore that changed everything

    10 de jun.

    A chore that changed everything

    The children we worry about are often not the ones carrying the heaviest loads. Sometimes it’s the capable child. The one who remembers. The one who helps. The one who never needs reminding. This week I’ve been thinking about a girl whose job was to feed the family dog. Every evening. No rewards, no praise, just a responsibility that taught her something powerful: “I matter here.” Children need opportunities to contribute. Not because we’re overwhelmed and need the help, but because they need to discover that they are capable, useful and part of something bigger than themselves. But there’s a fine line. Helping can teach a child competence and belonging. Or it can teach them that other people’s needs come first. In this week’s Parent Pause, I’m exploring the difference between responsibilities that help children grow roots and responsibilities that ask them to grow up too soon. It’s a conversation about chores, contribution and why some of the most successful adults I know still struggle to answer one simple question: “What do you need?” Thank you for pausing with me. Take care. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit kimmccabe.substack.com/subscribe

    3 min
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Become a less stressed parent in minutes kimmccabe.substack.com

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  • Criado por
    with Kim McCabe (because a pause is not a luxury)
  • Anos de atividade
    2 mil
  • Episódios
    174
  • Classificação
    Livre
  • Copyright
    © Kim McCabe
  • Site do podcast
    Parent Pause