Pondoff's Anonymous

Chris Pondoff, Zoë Mendenall
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Pondoff’s Anonymous is the unfiltered recovery podcast that says the quiet part out loud. Hosted by Chris Pondoff and Zoë Mendenall, it’s real talk about addiction, recovery, and everything between. Each episode dives into relapse, trauma, shame, and the hard f*cking work of getting better. Honest, raw, and laced with gallows humor, because sometimes the only way through pain is to laugh at it.

  1. S3 E14 Jakob comes home, at least for one episode!

    قبل يومين

    S3 E14 Jakob comes home, at least for one episode!

    Jakob Miller Is Back: Treatment, Harm Reduction, and the Hard Truth About Getting Clean Jakob Miller is back in the studio for a classic Pondoff’s Anonymous drive-by episode...which means the conversation starts somewhere ridiculous and somehow ends up getting very real. Chris, Zoë, Jeff, and Jakob talk through what’s new in Jakob’s life, the work happening at Illinois Recovery Center, and some of the bigger conversations happening in recovery right now: ibogaine, ketamine treatment, Suboxone, methadone, Vivitrol, naltrexone, harm reduction, detox, fentanyl, Adderall abuse, and what it actually takes to help someone get clean. Jakob shares his perspective from both lived experience and working in treatment, especially around the idea that harm reduction can save lives, but it shouldn’t become the final destination. The group also talks about ACEs, trauma, recovery structure, medication-assisted treatment, and why real recovery usually requires more than just one tool. It’s honest, funny, uncomfortable, scattered in the best way, and full of the kind of recovery talk that makes this show what it is. Topics include: - Jakob’s return to the studio - Marriage, family, and life after stepping back from the show - The protest at a sensory-friendly Easter service - Ibogaine, ketamine, and psychedelic-assisted treatment - Suboxone, methadone, Vivitrol, and naltrexone - Fentanyl detox and precipitated withdrawal - Harm reduction before and after treatment - Adderall abuse and stimulant addiction - ACEs, trauma, and childhood adversity - Why recovery requires structure, support, and honesty This episode is brought to you by McKelvey Insurance Group. If you’ve ever felt confused or overwhelmed by insurance, McKelvey Insurance Group keeps it simple. They’re an independent agency, which means they compare options from multiple providers to find coverage that actually fits you and your needs...not just one company’s policy. Call Evan McKelvey at McKelvey Insurance Group at 618-623-0080 or visit: https://mckelveyins.com This episode is also brought to you by LightSource Psychotherapy. What do we need when we’re in the dark? Sometimes it’s simply just a light source. Find out more at: http://findyourlightsource.com And don’t forget Light in the Dark, the Pondoff’s Anonymous dark roast created with our friends at Long Story Coffee. Every bag helps support the conversations and community behind the show. Order online at: https://pondoffsanonymous.com/coffee Pondoff’s Anonymous is hosted by Chris Pondoff with Zoë Mendenall and Jeff Allen. Produced, engineered, mixed, and filmed by Jeff Allen. Recorded at Illinois Recovery Center in the Pondoff’s Anonymous Studio. Music by McCall. The track is “Anti-Hero.” This podcast shares stories and conversations. It is not a substitute for professional help. If you need support, visit: https://pondoffsanonymous.com

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  2. Grace After Chaos with Alyssa Jarvis

    ٢٠ أبريل

    Grace After Chaos with Alyssa Jarvis

    Content note: This episode contains discussion of addiction, overdose, assault, suicidal ideation, homelessness, and other traumatic experiences. Please take care while listening. Alyssa Jarvis joins us to talk about faith, rejection, trauma, addiction, recovery, forgiveness, and the long road to building a new life. This is a heavy one, but it’s also full of honesty, resilience, and hope. Special thanks to our sponsors: McKelvey Insurance Group https://mckelveyins.com Light Source Psychotherapy http://findyourlightsource.com Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships 01:33 Personal Stories and Connections 02:59 Faith and Spiritual Journeys 06:06 Navigating Identity and Acceptance 11:56 Challenges of Homelessness and Addiction 20:00 Support Systems and Resilience 21:17 Navigating Adolescence and School Challenges 22:14 The Role of Xanax in Coping with Trauma 25:00 Understanding Addiction and Recovery 27:06 The Impact of Loss on Substance Use 33:15 The Journey of Forgiveness and Healing 46:29 The Drugging Incident 49:21 The Aftermath of Assault 50:46 Realizations and Consequences 51:05 First Treatment Experience 53:39 Escalation of Addiction 54:30 Overdoses and Near-Death Experiences 56:18 Friendship and Betrayal 01:01:10 Rock Bottom and Awakening 01:11:25 The Call for Help 01:14:02 Journey to Treatment 01:17:00 Entering Recovery 01:20:30 Finding Purpose in Pain 01:24:29 Navigating Relationships in Recovery 01:30:05 The Challenges of Motherhood 01:34:38 The Birth Experience 01:35:23 The Birth of Harley and Early Challenges 01:38:01 Navigating Single Parenthood 01:39:29 Finding Stability and Employment 01:41:41 The Journey to Recovery and New Beginnings 01:45:03 Building Community and Support 01:49:01 Spiritual Growth and Connection 01:57:06 Empowering Others Through Experience

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  3. S3 E12 Addiction, Sobriety, and Community with John Nettles

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    S3 E12 Addiction, Sobriety, and Community with John Nettles

    John Nettles joins Pondoff’s Anonymous for a real conversation about addiction, relapse, treatment, and what it actually takes to build a life that lasts. Originally from the St. Louis area and now living in California, John talks about growing up in Chesterfield, getting pulled into sports, nightlife, and the EDM scene, and how alcohol and drugs slowly took over everything. This episode gets into the messy reality of addiction...the false starts, the treatment attempts that didn’t stick, the consequences, and the slow shift from just surviving to actually changing. John also opens up about the recovery community that helped him, the grief and relationships he’s had to navigate sober, and what it means to find purpose after years of chaos. John is the Director of Alumni Relations at Refine Recovery in Sherman Oaks, California, where he helped build the alumni program to keep people connected and supported after treatment. He also hosts his own podcast, Recovery Refined, where he talks with guests about recovery, identity, adversity, and growth. If you’re in California and need help, check out Refine Recovery: https://refinerecovery.com/contact/ Check out John’s podcast, Recovery Refined: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-refined/id1867828182 Sponsors: A big thank you to our sponsors. We couldn’t do this without them. McKelvey Insurance Group https://www.mckelveyins.com/ Light Source https://findyourlightsource.com/ Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships 04:57 California's Treatment Landscape 11:06 Community Support and Recovery Initiatives 20:00 Growing Up in Chesterfield and Sports Background 25:19 Sports Culture and Personal Anecdotes 29:43 The Journey into Addiction 30:51 Treatment Programs and Their Impact 34:15 Navigating Recovery and Relapse 39:09 Building a Supportive Recovery Community 44:37 Comedy Night and Personal Reflections 46:11 Navigating Family Dynamics and Addiction 47:47 The Struggles of Early Adulthood and Substance Use 49:31 The Intersection of Substance Use and Nightlife 51:27 Geographic Changes and Their Impact on Addiction 54:43 The Escalation of Addiction and Its Consequences 57:27 The Turning Point: Realizations and Relationships 01:00:00 The Journey to Sobriety and Its Challenges 01:02:51 Facing the Consequences of Addiction 01:05:18 The Cycle of Sobriety and Relapse 01:10:03 Societal Views on Alcohol and Addiction 01:13:20 Moments of Willingness and Seeking Help 01:19:06 The Impact of Family and Relationships on Recovery 01:22:43 Reconnecting and Building Relationships 01:25:11 The Role of Pets in Recovery 01:30:02 The Journey to Treatment 01:31:03 Listening and Learning in Recovery 01:35:24 Detox and the Importance of Time 01:39:02 Finding Purpose in Recovery 01:45:39 Working in Treatment and Helping Others 01:46:37 Building Trust in Recovery 01:47:01 Creating a Supportive Alumni Network 01:48:50 The Importance of Community in Recovery 01:51:26 Navigating Grief and Loss 01:56:00 Finding Purpose in Service 02:00:05 Understanding Addiction and Recovery 02:02:12 Connecting Through Shared Experiences

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  4. S3 E11 Never Lose Hope with Tennille Heitkamp

    ٦ أبريل

    S3 E11 Never Lose Hope with Tennille Heitkamp

    Never Lose Hope with Tennille Heitkamp Tennille Heitkamp joins Pondoff’s Anonymous to share the long, painful, and hopeful story of walking through addiction with her son, Jacob. What starts as a conversation about Underground and finding the right support community turns into a brutally honest look at what addiction does to an entire family. Tennille talks about Jacob’s childhood, ADHD, early struggles to fit in, his exposure to pills and fentanyl, emergency room visits, detox, sober living, relapse, and the emotional chaos that came with trying to keep him alive. She also opens up about the toll it took on her, her marriage, her other son, and her own mental health as she tried to hold everything together. But this episode is not just about the darkness. It is also about not giving up. Tennille shares how Jacob eventually found real help, how Florida became a turning point, how he is now six months sober, and how hope slowly started to return. The conversation also highlights Tennille’s work with Addiction is Real, where she now helps other families recognize warning signs, find resources, and feel less alone. This episode is for parents, loved ones, and anyone who has ever felt exhausted by addiction and wondered if things can still get better. Sponsored by: McKelvey Insurance Group — https://www.mckelveyins.com LightSource Psychotherapy — https://findyourlightsource.com 00:00 Sponsor message: McKelvey Insurance Group + LightSource 00:56 Theme song 01:30 Welcome and meeting Tennille 06:48 How Tennille found Underground 09:16 Trying different support spaces until something fits 12:12 Creating a safe place for scared newcomers 15:27 Underground becomes bigger than anyone expected 17:42 Why Chris wanted Tennille to tell this story 18:43 Jacob, Jayden, and the beginning of the family story 24:02 Jacob’s childhood, diagnoses, surgeries, and early struggles 30:38 High school football, wanting to fit in, and pills 32:16 First exposure to fentanyl 33:34 Moving out, chasing belonging, and things unraveling 40:12 The first major fentanyl scare and ER trip 42:09 Detox, sober living, and the insurance nightmare 58:30 Family disease, shame, and trying to fix everything 1:01:33 Learning boundaries and finding family support 1:21:08 Another sober living setback 1:25:39 Airport chaos and getting Jacob back to treatment 1:30:54 New Jersey, sober living, and another return home 1:33:21 A good stretch, then relapse again 1:37:05 Hospital scare and the move to Florida 1:38:05 Florida treatment and meeting Emily 1:40:21 Six months sober and a different future 1:42:48 Tennille’s work with Addiction is Real 1:50:39 How Jacob is doing now 1:53:55 Credits 1:54:26 Light in the Dark coffee outro

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  5. S3E10 The Weight of Shame with Julie Wiseman

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    S3E10 The Weight of Shame with Julie Wiseman

    Content Note: This episode contains discussion of suicide, addiction, and mental health. Julie Wiseman with her friend (also) Julie Thanks to our sponsors: McKelvey Insurance Group http://mckelveyins.com LightSource http://FindYourLightSource.com In this episode of Pondoff’s Anonymous, Chris and Zoë sit down with Julie Wiseman, joined by her friend Dee, for a deeply honest conversation about grief, learning differences, addiction, and the long shadow of shame. Julie shares the story of her son Nick, from early struggles with dyslexia and anxiety to the deeper mental health and substance use battles that followed, and the devastating reality of losing him to suicide. Along the way, the conversation opens up into something even bigger… parenting fear, the pressure kids carry, the gaps in support for teens and families, and the kind of community that can help people feel less alone. Julie talks about creating Nick’s Beautiful Angels, Zoë reflects on her own experience with dyslexia and ADHD, and the group keeps coming back to a simple truth… isolation makes everything worse, and honest connection matters. Chapters: 00:00 Navigating Personal Challenges 02:51 Understanding Learning Differences 12:15 The Impact of ADHD and Dyslexia 20:51 Social Connections and Communication 32:06 The Role of Support Systems 40:19 Exploring Addiction and Recovery 49:48 The Importance of Open Conversations 59:48 Coping with Isolation and Pressure 01:09:49 Finding Joy in Everyday Life 01:19:33 The Journey of Self-Discovery 01:29:00 Fear, Setbacks, and Turning Points 01:39:00 Living With Panic and Uncertainty 01:47:11 The Weight of the Last Text 01:57:00 Grief in Daily Life 02:05:00 Courage, Community, and Keep Going 02:13:20 Landing the Plane

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  6. S3E9 Lyndsey Jacob

    ١٦ مارس

    S3E9 Lyndsey Jacob

    In this episode of Pondoff’s Anonymous, Chris sits down with Lyndsey Jacob, Kyle Jacob, and Zoë for an honest conversation about addiction, recovery, trauma, ADHD, marriage, family, sobriety, and healing. Lyndsey shares what it was like to live in denial while knowing things could not keep going the way they were. She talks about cocaine use, alcohol, secrecy, survival mode, shame, and the fear of facing life without substances. This episode explores the turning points that led her toward honesty, treatment, and recovery. Chris, Lyndsey, Kyle, and Zoë also talk about the impact addiction has on marriage, trust, family, finances, motherhood, and identity. They unpack how childhood experiences, trauma, and ADHD can shape adult behavior and self-perception, and how deeper issues can stay hidden underneath addiction for years. This conversation also gets into support systems, accountability, stigma, and the role of community in recovery. Kyle shares what it was like to walk through this as a husband, and the episode offers a real look at what healing can require from everyone involved. It is messy, personal, honest, and hopeful. If you are interested in addiction recovery, sobriety, trauma healing, mental health, ADHD, relationships, or real stories of change, this episode is for you. Timestamps 00:00 Introduction and Sponsorships01:11 Personal Reflections on Life and Challenges02:34 The Importance of Connection and Community06:00 Navigating Personal Struggles and Support Systems09:29 The Journey of Recovery and Realizations12:43 Understanding Addiction and Its Complexities16:14 The Role of Family and Relationships in Recovery19:10 Childhood Experiences and Their Impact on Adulthood25:46 Unpacking Trauma and ADHD27:11 The Turning Point: Coming Clean to Family28:19 The Importance of Support in Recovery32:01 Facing the Reality of Addiction36:00 Unpacking Trauma and Honesty48:59 The Journey of Self-Discovery52:03 Understanding Different Addictive Behaviors58:12 Navigating Substance Use and Social Norms59:58 The Journey of a Single Mother01:02:55 Love, Loss, and New Beginnings01:05:58 The Highs and Lows of Addiction01:09:52 The Cost of Addiction on Finances and Relationships01:24:31 The Impact of Addiction on Family Dynamics01:27:12 Breaking the Stigma of Addiction01:30:49 Accountability and Personal Growth in Recovery01:32:01 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Healing01:39:07 Understanding the Nature of Addiction01:41:01 The Role of Community in Recovery01:52:00 Finding Purpose in Recovery01:56:08 Embracing Authenticity and Connection Sponsors McKelvey Insurance Grouphttps://mckelveyins.com LightSource Psychotherapyhttps://findyourlightsource.com

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  7. Fentanyl Killed My Son at a Sleepover | A Mother's Fight for Justice with Tiffany Foster

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    Fentanyl Killed My Son at a Sleepover | A Mother's Fight for Justice with Tiffany Foster

    Fentanyl Killed My Son at a Sleepover | A Mother's Fight for Justice Tiffany Foster's son Zack was 13 when he died from fentanyl poisoning at a friend's sleepover. He wasn't an addict. It was his first time. Eight days after his birthday, he was gone. Tiffany shares Zack's story -- his childhood, the night of August 28th, four years of legal battles, and the advocacy work she does now. If you're a parent, someone in recovery, or anyone who loves a young person, this one is for you. Fentanyl doesn't discriminate. Two milligrams -- the tip of a pencil -- is lethal. Zack had 44. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 -- Introduction to the Journey03:36 -- The Impact of Loss and Grief12:29 -- Understanding Zack's Childhood and Development24:32 -- Navigating Adolescence and Early Experimentation36:00 -- The Tragic Night and Its Consequences38:48 -- Navigating Parental Concerns42:05 -- The Night of the Incident44:28 -- The Shocking News51:50 -- Understanding the Overdose54:24 -- The Aftermath and Legal Proceedings01:01:32 -- The Trials and Sentencing01:19:12 -- Judicial System Insights and Parole Eligibility01:22:28 -- Navigating Grief and the Impact of Trials01:26:05 -- The Verdict: A Moment of Relief01:30:21 -- Joining the Fight Against Addiction01:33:08 -- Early Prevention and Education on Substance Use01:41:43 -- Hidden in Plain View: Raising Awareness01:48:11 -- Knowledge is Power: Engaging Parents in Prevention01:50:15 -- Creating Awareness Through Personal Stories01:52:53 -- The Importance of Authenticity in Communication01:56:05 -- Navigating Grief and Addiction02:01:40 -- The Journey of Recovery and Support02:05:51 -- The Role of Community in Healing02:10:37 -- Continuing the Conversation on Addiction ABOUT ZACK Born August 21, 2008. Outgoing, loving, never met a stranger. He loved horror movies, video games, soccer, and Halloween, and had a personality big enough to fill any room. He was eight days past his 13th birthday when he died. His toxicology came back with 44 milligrams of fentanyl -- a lethal dose is 2 to 5 milligrams, an amount that fits on the tip of a pencil. THE LEGAL OUTCOME Three adults were charged. Andrew Amalong: convicted, 40 years concurrent. Thomas Noonan -- whose biological daughter had died from fentanyl three weeks before Zack -- convicted, 45 years consecutive with a repeat offender enhancement. Jury deliberations: 90 minutes and 30 minutes respectively. Final sentencing: August 2025. WHAT EVERY PARENT NEEDS TO HEAR Fentanyl is in marijuana, counterfeit pills, and things no one expects. Two milligrams is lethal.Zack was not an addict. This was his first time. One try can be fatal now.Talk to your kids early -- the fear that the conversation invites experimentation is wrong.Know where your kids sleep. Vet the household, not just whether a parent is home.Fentanyl poisoning does not care about grades, zip codes, or family stability.ADDICTION IS REAL Tiffany is a board member of Addiction Is Real, a St. Louis nonprofit focused on early substance use prevention and education. Their Hidden in Plain View program is a bedroom display with 70+ warning signs and stash items parents wouldn't recognize. They're building permanent mobile trailer displays -- needed by April 2026. Free parent toolkit at addictionisreal.org. SPONSORS Light Source PsychotherapyMcKelvey Insurance Group | 618-623-0080 CONNECT pondoffsanonymous.com Pondoff's Anonymous | Chris Pandoff, Zoe Mendenall, Jeff Allen | Illinois Recovery Center | Music: McCall -- "Anti-Hero"

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  8. “We Is Stronger Than Me” with Ryan Canaday & Karie McMullen

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    “We Is Stronger Than Me” with Ryan Canaday & Karie McMullen

    “We Is Stronger Than Me” with Ryan Canaday & Karie McMullenPondoff’s Anonymous Ryan Canaday and Karie McMullen from FREE Recovery Community in Denver join us for a raw, thoughtful conversation about addiction, faith, grief, and the power of community. This episode explores what happens when recovery shifts from isolation to connection. We talk about shame, anger at God, burnout in ministry spaces, losing people to addiction, and the kind of spiritual community that makes room for doubt instead of punishing it. At the center of this episode is one simple but powerful idea: “we” is stronger than “me.” About FREE Recovery Community FREE Recovery Community (Denver, CO) https://www.freerecoverycommunity.com A spiritually grounded recovery community focused on connection, belonging, and breaking shame through honest conversation. Time Stamps 00:00 – Introduction to the journey 03:12 – Transformative moments in recovery 08:55 – Faith, community, and what actually helps people heal 12:54 – Doubt, anger at God, and staying spiritually honest 17:47 – Addiction and family systems 22:48 – Desperation, surrender, and what finally shifts 30:32 – “We” is stronger than “me” 35:03 – The illusion of anonymity and the power of shame 59:53 – How FREE Recovery Community started 01:05:56 – Grief, funerals, and the urgency of the work 01:30:31 – Representation and belonging in spiritual spaces 02:00:56 – Baptism and redemptionConnect with Pondoff’s Anonymous https://www.pondoffsanonymous.com Sponsors McKelvey Insurance Group https://www.mckelveyins.com LightSource Psychotherapy (Belleville, IL) https://www.findyourlightsource.com

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Pondoff’s Anonymous is the unfiltered recovery podcast that says the quiet part out loud. Hosted by Chris Pondoff and Zoë Mendenall, it’s real talk about addiction, recovery, and everything between. Each episode dives into relapse, trauma, shame, and the hard f*cking work of getting better. Honest, raw, and laced with gallows humor, because sometimes the only way through pain is to laugh at it.

المعلومات

  • صناع العمل
    Chris Pondoff, Zoë Mendenall
  • سنوات النشاط
    ٢٠١٩ - ٢٠٢٦
  • الحلقات
    ٧٥
  • التقييم
    فاضح
  • حقوق النشر
    © Chris Pondoff, Zoë Mendenall
  • موقع البرنامج على الويب
    Pondoff's Anonymous

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