Procedural Veneration

Daphne & Hank
  • 5.0 (4)
  • TV REVIEWS
  • UPDATED BIWEEKLY

An untrue crime podcast where we talk about, rate, and goof on all the crime procedurals you’ve watched way too many times. Using our highly scientific evaluation system (the worst, the best, and the median) we will weave our way through dark back alleys and dirty crime scenes to definitively answer the questions: 1) Which crime procedural is the best? and 2) How many spin offs of popular procedurals are we willing to sift through? No previous knowledge of the shows are required, trust us, we're watching most of them for the first time! Read about our evaluation system and the episodes we've selected in our blog and follow along with us!

  1. 11/01/2023

    Haven: Bad boy Duke makes fools of us all

    Loosely tangentially related to a thought Stephen King once had... This week we talk about SyFy original Haven, known for putting WWE superstar Edge on the map. I cannot express enough, this show is not Eureka. Join us as we discuss poop-colored aether, cocoon sleep-crime, and cozy seaside Maine towns that are actually Nova Scotian. We looked at the first, second and last episodes to make our opinions on the Nathan vs. Duke conflict clear. Stay out of our way fanfic authors. Content warnings: abusive parents, a lot of orphans, alien nonsense. Theme song by Jake Krutulis.

    1h 6m

  2. 10/15/2023

    Numb3rs: Horizontal Sex Magnate

    You've been enum3rated! This week we talk about CBS Drama Numb3rs, and no, it never gets any easier to type. Join us as we discuss the troubling monopoly David Krumholtz holds on bedroom activities, and a deep-dive into the psyche of double-- make that triple-- agents.We discuss the best (S3E24 The Janus List), worst (S2E3 Obsession), and most mediocre (S5E15 Guilt Trip) episodes and make harsh judgment on the buffoons and geniuses of numbers.Content warnings for Stalking, murder, acts of terrorism, reference to sexual violence, and beach mansions.Theme song credit to Jake Krutulis.

    49 min

  3. 10/07/2023

    CSI NY: Ben Stiller's Mummified Corpse

    The triumphant return of ProcVen! This week we dive into another Gary Sinise romp, this time in the CSI Universe. Join us as we watch the best (S6E10 Death House), worst (S1E5 A Man a Mile), and median-rated (S7E8 Scared Stiff). Will Gary's charming delivery save this snooze fest, or will New York's dark past consume itself.Content Warnings: Murder, Accidental Fratricide, Drowning, Escape RoomsWe also recognize that crime procedurals exist as a form of "Copaganda" by portraying civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light.Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    1h 15m

  4. 07/17/2023

    Castle: The Reverse Flash's Spy B******t

    The season finale of Procedural Veneration! = HUGE SPOILERS FOR THE TV SHOW CASTLE IN THIS EPISODE =We tire quickly at spy b******t forced into a perfectly decent crime show. Hank puts together a scene. The Reverse Flash rears his yellow cowled face.Watch the best (S4 E22 Always), worst (S8 E22 LokSat), and median (S7 E2 Montreal) rated episodes along with us and find out.Content Warnings: Homicide Undercover boss Joss Whedon We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light.Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    1h 7m

  5. 06/30/2023

    Criminal Minds Beyond Borders: Can We Take That Again Gary?

    It is official. Our friendship with Gary has ended. We watch Criminal Minds Beyond Borders and answer the questions: 1) Can Gary try that line again? 2) Is it possible for such a star studded cast to have such low chemistry with each other? and 3) Is this show part of a deep-seeded and widespread conspiracy? Watch the best (S2 E7 La Huesuda), worst (S1 E12 Harvested), and kind of median (S1 E2 Harvested) episodes along with us and find out. Content Warnings: Racism, Xenophobia, Mutilation, Torture. We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying policing, civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light. Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    59 min

  6. 06/19/2023

    Criminal Minds: A*****e and Its Derivatives

    In this episode of Procedural Veneration we do some investigative journalism to try and uncover a far-reaching Criminal Minds Conspiracy. We also answer important questions like; is Criminal Minds just torture porn? Watch the best (S11 E11 Entropy), worst (S11 E8 Awake), and kind of median (S16 E1 Just Getting Started) episodes along with us and find out. Content Warnings: Pretty much anything and everything potentially troublesome. Child murder, sexual assault, torture, mutilation, etc. We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying policing, civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light. Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    1h 9m

  7. 06/02/2023

    The Closer: Gaslight Gatekeep Gitmo

    In this episode of Procedural Veneration we coerce some content out of Gitmo Girlboss Brenda Leigh-Johnson. Daphne and Hank go good-cop/bad-cop as we delve into the realm of viagra detectives, sniper vengeance, and box seats at the Dodger's game. Watch the best (S2 E6 To Protect and Serve), worst (S1 E4 Show Yourself), and median (S6E4 Layover) episodes along with us and find out. Content Warnings: Murder, Mutilation, Drugs, J.K. Simmons We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying policing, civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light. Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    1h 14m

  8. 05/19/2023

    Columbo: Commodore Baddie Daddy

    In this episode of Procedural Veneration we look at just one more thing with detective John Columbo. Dive with Daphne and Hank into the world of baddy commodores, girlboss murderers, and Samuel Loomis' failing winery. Watch the best (S3 E2 Any Old Port in a Storm), worst (S5 E6 Last Salute to the Commodore), and median (S7E3 Make Me a Perfect Murder) rated episodes along with us and find out. Content Warnings:Murder, Alcoholism, Wine Snobbery We also recognize that crime procedurals often are a form of "Copaganda" by portraying civil rights violations and other unlawful actions by representatives of the law in a positive light .Thank you to Jacob Krutulis for our theme song!

    57 min
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5
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

An untrue crime podcast where we talk about, rate, and goof on all the crime procedurals you’ve watched way too many times. Using our highly scientific evaluation system (the worst, the best, and the median) we will weave our way through dark back alleys and dirty crime scenes to definitively answer the questions: 1) Which crime procedural is the best? and 2) How many spin offs of popular procedurals are we willing to sift through? No previous knowledge of the shows are required, trust us, we're watching most of them for the first time! Read about our evaluation system and the episodes we've selected in our blog and follow along with us!

Information

  • Creator
    Daphne & Hank
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    13
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Daphne Fauber 2022
  • Show Website
    Procedural Veneration