My experiences began as a child, but the time I spent “walking in the light” started during Spring 2016. During that time, before it had a name, I began purposefully seeking clarity and connection through simple mental/physical/spiritual routines and games of randomness, and presently began to sense a distinct universal alignment. Undeniably real and consciously explored, though completely outside of my control in many ways, I drifted. Through doors. Ecstatic.
I obsessively sought and followed every clue to guide my journey each day from sunrise to sunset. Eventually, I was overcome with “the walk”. I left my normal life behind and was itinerant in the truest sense of the word. I told everyone I met (myriad groups and individuals) about my sublime adventures as they happened in real time. Albeit through socially acceptable yet coded language and confided in only a few friends and my daughter. In truth, I believe I had tapped into what some might call Christ consciousness and was identifying as a type of John the Baptist. Though I would never admit that to anyone, but myself or my own mind. Even so, I would hesitate to actually believe that I was literally him for fear of transgressing some universal boundary. After many weeks of persistent (and increasingly visceral) synchronization, divinely appointed circumstances and wonders I can hardly explain, I allowed myself to doubt my resolve to go fully to the end. Then my family compelled me to seek psychiatric evaluation. At this point I did despair and was fearful of my fate if I walked any further down the path I was clearly on. Death was waiting there. No one can convince me of less. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have ever agreed to be detained and evaluated.
The 72 hour emergency psychiatric hold at Duke Medical Center led to a 10 day hospitalization at Central Regional Hospital. That treatment was meant to be remedial, but the ordeal left me damaged and unable to reconcile my experiences with the mutually agreed reality all others expected me to live. I have been given a glimpse of something. I can’t deny it, but I find myself forgetting it’s realness.... like waking from dreaming.
All this and (infinitely) more are the things I want to discuss with you, Comrade and Nick, et al. The things you’ve uncovered through the fatum project and what you might call Randonautica are things I have experienced naturally without the aid of modern technology. I know this is so, because these experiences are universal and literally essential to the human condition and those of us who dare to explore ever deeper and wider need to help each other manifest the next evolution of self. We will understand these phenomena in time. I hope you’ll engage with me in this; the noblest pursuit of truth through chaos to enlightenment and around again. Thank you.
So now a riddle of sorts:
ABSFTK
Please, tell me what you think this means.
