Recognizing Potential is THE podcast to learn tips and information on how to build the marriage you want! Your host, Kameran Thompson Al-Areqi, is a certified relationship coach on a mission to help couples divorce proof their marriages by learning better communication, healthier conflict resolution techniques, more effective habits, and how to love your spouse with peace and generosity. Kameran is a pilot wife, boy mom, entrepreneur, coach and former teacher. She speaks into all of that and more every Monday morning.
Ep 49: The Marriage Mistake Experts - Kevin & Bree Bailey
Kevin & Bree Bailey spent $100, 000 on a divorce only to reconcile in the final moments of said divorce. They tell their story, how they went from divorcing and a nasty deposition to helping couples restore their marriage! They talk about their walks with God, how God is first in their marriage and marriages are truly under attack right now. What happens when you separate marriages? What's causing such a decline in dating and remarriage after divorce? We talk in depth about the steps needed to restore your marriage, even if you're the only one working on it. The episode dives into what wives and husbands do and don't do that cause hurt and problems in marriages. We talk a lot about how Bree and Kevin have shaped their marriage into having a legacy worth leaving now so you can do the same.
This episode is heavily based on Biblical principles and it is the opinion of Kameran, Kevin and Bree. This episode is for this world but not of this world. #IYKYK
If you are interested in coaching with Kameran, email email@example.com.
For coaching with Kevin or Bree- email firstname.lastname@example.org or email@example.com
Ep 48: Rebuilding Trust and Staying in Your Energy Lane w/Guest Joy Harrington
Joy Harrington is a life coach, wife, mom and overall incredible human being! She has the best fashion sense too!
**TRIGGER WARNINGS AHEAD** (Infant loss, infidelity)
On today's episode, we start out talking about the infidelity her marriage endured. For 9 months she laid on the couch wallowing in misery, negativity and doubt. Then she got real with herself, got up and started working on herself. She and her husband, Peter, went to counseling, then marriage coaching, and started to grow and thrive together. She tells her story of getting pregnant with their third child, Sterling, and losing him one day after he was born. She gives so many great tips on how they stopped merely surviving and started thriving as a couple.
Next, Joy and I get into masculine and feminine energies- how to know which one you're in, how to slide back into the one you want to be in and what happens when you're not meshing well with your partner energetically. We talk about conflict cycles as it pertains to our energetic polarity and how to deal with marriage if your partner is gone a lot or is reintegrating back into home life after having been gone.
Lastly, we talk about homeschooling, traveling and how to stop settling for "good enough" and create a life you can truly be proud of, happy and fulfilled by and not in comparison to others.
If any of what Joy has to say today ignites your soul like it has mine, you can follow her on IG @joyharrington.ig
If you're interested in The Resentment Trap program she references in the podcast, the website is www.levelupbabe.com/thelevelupclub
If you're interested in marriage coaching and working through the struggles in your marriage, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Follow me on IG @divorce.proof.marriage or on FB at www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential
EP 47: We Can Do Hard Things...Together with Tanner and Mariah Littrell
On today's episode, I sit down with Tanner and Mariah Littrell to talk about how they've built an incredible marriage, chased dreams, achieved goals and created a beautiful family. Through loss, a journey through beating cancer, two miracle pregnancies, moving to a new city, we talk about their whole story. This episode will have you laughing, crying and understanding exactly what it means to be a team, to win together, and to build a marriage that inspires everyone around you. Tanner and Mariah are the epitome of what a fantastic marriage looks like. I love their humble, salt of the earth demeanor and most of all, the gratitude, pride, consistency, and deep admiration they have for each other. They validate each other. They listen and they communicate so well. I hope you end this episode with a whole page of ideas on how to use what they have and what they've gone through to better your own marriage. If you want to follow them or support their restaurant, you can find them here:
Ep 46: Understanding Gender Intelligences with Andre Paradis
This week I sit down with Andre Paradis, ex Chippendales dancer turned ballroom dancer turned science-based relationship coach. Andre talks in depth about the difference between boys, guys and men, what men want and how to balance your relationship by understanding your differences. We deep dive into how a relationship is a lot like ballroom dancing. Who leads? How does that happen? What does that look like? What happens when there's conflict and you're on a negative cycle? How do you get off the merry-go-round? Andre tells you what that looks like and how to navigate it. Men, if you feel like you need help understanding women, or how to be a better husband, a better partner, a better man, this is the podcast for you as well! We talk about attachment styles, negative cycles and how to create a great relationship by stepping into your partner's world.
You can find and follow Andre at any of the following links.
Project Equinox with Andre Paradis
FB Private Group for Ladies - Free
Project Equinox with Andre Paradis
You can find and follow Kameran here:
Ep 45: Repairing After Conflict
I recently polled my instagram followers on whether they repaired after an argument or just moved on with or without an apology from either side. 76% of the votes said they just moved on.
The reason this is concerning is that the repair is the most important part of the argument and it's missing in the majority of marriages.
So what is repairing and why is it important?
Repairing is fostering the connection between you and your partner after the argument so there is less negativity, resentment and lingering feelings or unmet expectations. Every time you repair after conflict, you're laying another brick in the foundational elements that help you handle larger conflict down the road. You're bringing your marriage back together.
How do we repair?
After the argument when you've both calmed down, met your basic needs (sleep, water, food), are no longer in a defensive state and can listen to each other's point of view so you can understand, not just respond, you're ready to repair.
Come together to have a conversation about what happened. Using an I statement "I felt (emotion word) when (circumstance) because (why did it trigger you). I need _________ to move forward.
Using I statements helps you focus on you. This is important because every time there is a conflict, both parties have a hand in it. We can't change our partner, so we have to change our own behavior. If done correctly, it takes away criticism, blame and shame of your partner.
After both sides have given their perspective, talk calmly about the disconnect that happened. Was it a miscommunication? Was there an assumption that was made (or many assumptions)? Apologize for your part in the disconnect and if possible, help your partner get the need met that they stated in their I statement. Forgive and move forward after both of you feel reconnected.
Some things to keep in mind while going through this:
The goal here is to approach this with a solution-oriented attitude.
Communication is 58% body language, 35% tone and 7% words. Make sure your body language and your tone are sending the same message your words are.
Give your partner the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes this is harder than others, especially if you're dealing with a reoccurring cycle (in which case, I would suggest getting help). Remember that this is your partner who loves you, not your enemy and you're in this to understand and do things differently, not to judge and condemn.
Take a break if needed but you must come back and try again later. This isn't going to be perfect every single time. My husband and I have started to repair many times only to find that we aren't as calm as we thought or one of us says something that triggers the other again and we have to come back later and repair both conflicts.
Disconnection is not caused by conflict. Conflict is caused by disconnection. The whole purpose of the repair is to bring that connection back together, not widen the gap. Keep things calm, low in tone, slow in process, and focus on building each other back up. There is no scorecard in connected marriages.
Ep 44: Creating Secure Attachments in Marriage and Parenting with Julie Mennano, LMFT
Julie Menanno is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, as well as a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor. Julie’s mission is to make the insights and practical skills she uses to treat couples in in her private practice more accessible to a wider population.
Julie runs Bozeman Therapy and Counseling where she and a staff of therapists treat couples and individuals.
Secure Love is Julie’s first book and is a guide to getting unstuck from a negative cycle and finding attachment security with your partner.
In this episode, Julie and I talk all about anxious, avoidant and disorganized attachment styles. Julie gives advice and tips on how to:
identify your attachment style
recognize what's happening in a negative cycle
overcome a negative cycle
know what to do in the middle of a conflict
create secure attachments in your romantic relationships
parent your children so you create secure attachments in them so they have more successful relationships later in life
This episode is a must listen to if you're in a relationship romantically, a parent, a grandparent or plan on being in any kind of relationship in the future.
Julie's IG: instagram.com/thesecurerelationship
Julie's Patreon account: https://www.patreon.com/thesecurerelationship
Kameran's IG: instagram.com/divorce.proof.marriage
Kameran's Facebook group: facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential
Link to monthly membership mentioned in ad: recognizingpotential.teachable.com/p/connected
$10 off Amare mental wellness products: https://amare.com/g10/145624
I’m someone that loves podcasts. I usually have a hard time listening to single person pods, but I LOVED this one and had no problems at all. After listening to one episode I felt so motivated to make changes in my life that will make me happier and fulfill my highest self.