Rocket Pants

Rocket Pants is a good podcast. No doubt about that. If you want to listen to two and a half mildly entertaining and charismatic guys talk aimlessly about things of the past, this is definitely your kind of drivel. What really makes this podcast worth it's weight, though, is the devilishly handsome, hipster dreamboat that is Christopher Swartz. The man knows his way around video games, craft beer (not surprising, given his German heritage), and my heart. Every time he speaks, my heart flutters, and I swear it isn't just the plaque. The other day, I had a dream of leaving my husband of 23 years for this exotic, Floridian beauty, and oh how I wish that dream were a reality. I'd let his gator snap down on me any time. Chris, if you're reading this, please, give me a sign. My love burns for you with the heat of a thousand humid Florida summers, deep fried and left on a picnic table in Disneyworld. I hope to be with you someday. Until then, I will continue to love you from afar. Mi amo.