Keeping up with my muse

Mark Niemann-Ross

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I was the youngest resident of my mother-in-law's senior community for two months. I am a mere sixty-five-years old and am told I'm an interloper, an outsider to this community with no hope of truly joining for another fifteen years. In contrast to my older friends at Evergreen Meadows Senior Community, my knees still work, I do yoga balance poses without a chair, and I (occasionally) win at pickleball. Here are stories from that experience

12/10/2024

Ruby

Ruby's legs are short and she has some trouble walking, but manages to get where she wants to go and get there when she wants to be there. You might wish for more rapid progress towards a destination, but that's something you want - not Ruby. Ruby frequently visits Evergreen Meadows Senior Community. Her many friends know when to expect her visit and gather together in one place so as not to inconvenience her. They chat and socialize. Ruby doesn't understand the conversation, but is attentive and interested. What more could you want from a good friend? This is an excerpt from ⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
11/10/2024

Only Two Months

Janell and I have an open-ended lease of this apartment and could stay here as long as we wish. It's expensive, but comfortable and convenient. We've provided 24x7 physical therapy for Greta and made an enormous difference in her quality of life. It's a tempting place to spend a year. But we have a life in Portland. We have friends, an ocean, a house, a neighborhood. Our neighbor dog sticks his head through a hole in the fence and whines for biscuits. Our chickens lay eggs. We belong to clubs and a church. All of that is on hold until we return. We can't do it online. This is an excerpt from ⁠⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
11/10/2024

Angels Among Us

As part of our efforts to improve Greta's strength, Janell and I have been taking Greta on strolls. She slouches over her walker. "Walk like a super model," Janell tells her. "T**s Up!" Greta and Janell laugh; I try to maintain a sense of proper son-in-law decorum. Greta straightens her back, and we resume our walk. This is an excerpt from ⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
11/10/2024

Navigating The Halls

There are seven hallways in the residence where I live; three are in the assisted living wing, three are in the independent wing, and one is in the memory wing. Each hallway services six or more rooms. Each room has a door with a small cubby that invites personal expression. Most cubbies post pictures of Jesus or Mary. Many feature ceramic dogs or cats (but not both). There are plants and flags and war memorabilia and wind chimes and drawings by grandchildren. This is an excerpt from My Favorite Mother-In-Law, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print. #aging
26/09/2024

Harassing the Natives

Now that I'm a resident, I'm allowed to loiter in the hallways, and I frequently do so outside Greta's door, located on the main avenue between assisted living and the dining room. There is a lot of foot traffic. To my left, I see Margaret approaching, pushing her walker. I'm in a frivolous mood and I call her out. "Young lady," I bellow. "Do you have a hall pass? I think you should be in class, and if you don't have permission to be out here, you'll have to report to the principal's office!" This is an excerpt from ⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
26/09/2024

My Muse

When I'm not hanging out with Greta, I write. I'm working on my second science fiction novel. But the characters are elusive, and I'm unable to force the book into existence. My muse is supposed to help me with this heavy lift, but is apparently vacationing at Mount Helicon. (This is prime season to be handing out laurel staffs to the local shepherds. Plus, the skiing is awesome.) I write a sentence, then delete the sentence. Electronic word processors have spared me from having to purchase whiteout in bulk. Early in my writing career, I assumed my muse would appear in a form similar to Venus De Milo—but with arms. Standing in a green pasture, she would strum on a harp while narrating outlines of Pulitzer-Prize winning novels. I would sit in a comfortable chair and transcribe her words while the literary world clamored to offer me fame and fortune. Yes. Well. Apparently not the case. This is an excerpt from ⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
25/09/2024

Siblings

Greta and Gene raised five children: three girls, two boys. There were more conceived, but these ended in miscarriages. Gene and Greta picked up the pieces and moved on. This is an excerpt from ⁠⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
23/09/2024

Kitchen

Greta and her kitchen were legendary. Everyone was fed and watered from the moment they arrived until the last hand of Sheepshead was played. Even then, she would pack a sandwich for the trip home. Greta called it "a little lunch." When I recall my early memories of Greta, she is always in her kitchen. I emphasize "her kitchen" on purpose. I recall being able to sit at the table; I don't recall standing and talking. I would have been in the way. This is an excerpt from ⁠⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
23/09/2024

Sundowning

"I cannot believe I have such ungrateful children," Greta suddenly speaks up in the dark. "I am going to give all of my money to charity and you will get none of it." This is an excerpt from ⁠⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
21/09/2024

Aging

I've been twenty-five for about four decades. Today, I awoke to find I'm suddenly sixty-five. I use adverbs sparingly, but in this case, "suddenly" fits. Sixty-five is harder than twenty-five. This is an excerpt from ⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.
02/09/2024

How I Got Here

For two months, I have been the youngest resident of my mother-in-law's senior community. I am a mere sixty-five-years old and am told I'm an interloper, an outsider to this community with no hope of truly joining for another fifteen years. In contrast to my older friends at Evergreen Meadows Senior Community, my knees still work, I do yoga balance poses without a chair, and I (occasionally) win at pickleball. I eat and drink pretty much what I like and I stay up past 9:00 p.m. All of these disqualify me from living at Evergreen Meadows Senior Community. Yet, here I am. This is an excerpt from ⁠⁠My Favorite Mother-In-Law⁠⁠, available as audiobook, ebook, or in print.

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I was the youngest resident of my mother-in-law's senior community for two months. I am a mere sixty-five-years old and am told I'm an interloper, an outsider to this community with no hope of truly joining for another fifteen years. In contrast to my older friends at Evergreen Meadows Senior Community, my knees still work, I do yoga balance poses without a chair, and I (occasionally) win at pickleball. Here are stories from that experience

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Mark Niemann-Ross
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Keeping up with my muse