Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage
  • 4.6 (6K)
  • SEXUALITY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY
Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex and relationship questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, record your question and send it to Q@Savage.Love, or call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

  1. What Goes On at the Bathhouse?

    3D AGO

    What Goes On at the Bathhouse?

    A man in a queer group chat saw that folks were talking about going to a bathhouse in their city for the first time. The caller explained what goes on there, how consent can be slushy, and trans men might not feel welcome. This shut down the conversation. Was he wrong to tell it like it is? A divorced woman with a 4 year old daughter is friendly with her ex-husband but not close. Her daughter is asking why mommy and daddy are not married and don't live together. She's never explained divorce to her daughter. How can she phrase it? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan speaks with Katie Simon, sexuality journalist and the author of the upcoming book Tell Me What You Like: An Honest Discussion of Sex and Intimacy After Sexual Assault. They discuss how survivors take many varied paths to healing including for some, going through a "slut phase." For anyone going through recovery from sexual trauma, or supporting someone who is, Simon's book is required reading, and this convo is a great place to start. And a gay, pre-op trans man has a troubling pattern. He can't have anal sex because of health issues, so penetrative sex for him involves his vagina. He gets together with gay men, explains his situation and his biology explicitly. But afterwards, his lovers flip out and reject him because they no longer feel like "gold star" gays. The experience is shredding. How can he find men who will work for him? Q@Savage.Love. 206-302-2064 Subscribe to Magnum for the full interviews, chats with Dan, and more! This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site wide plus, a FREE Bedding Bundle- that’s, a Sheet Set, and Mattress Protector- with any Luxe or Elite mattress order. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now.  This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial plus 25% off an annual subscription when you go to dipseastories.com/savage.  This episode is brought to you by Beam’s Dream Cocoa Powder- packed with all-natural ingredients to help improve sleep. For a limited time, Beam is offering my listeners up to 40% off. Go to shopbeam.com/SAVAGE and use code SAVAGE at checkout. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, news junkie, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From apps to abstinence, unicorns to underpants and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

    53 min
  2. Fake News! A history of The Onion with Christine Wenc

    MAY 13

    Fake News! A history of The Onion with Christine Wenc

    HA man briefly dated a guy who only bottoms, and collects a variety of giant dildos. The caller worries that his natural size would never satisfy a man like this, and wonders if this is just the standard psychology of power bottoms. A straight woman tends to be attracted to gay and bisexual men, though she's never dated one. She would be interested in dating a bi man, but she requires monogamy, and worries that precious few bi men would be able to commit to her. Is it reasonable to ask a bi man to forgo wieners to be with her? For our guest this week, we are thoroughly chuffed to welcome Christine Wenc to the show. Wenc is the author of the new book "Funny Because It's True: How The Onion Created Modern American News Satire." Wenc was a member of The Onion’s original staff. She was also one of the first editors of The Stranger in Seattle where Dan got his start. The two talk about the Onion's history, how it influenced both mainstream journalism and comedy, fake news, and she and Dan reminisce about the old days. She also answers a couple of sex questions, and issues this important PSA: "The clitoris is much more than just a little button."- NOT fake news. A queer woman presents as masc, and non-binary folks recognize her as one of their own. But she's attracted to dudes. Should she alter her look to turn that male gaze in her direction? Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now.  This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage. This episode is sponsored by the iRestore Professional, for regrowing hair using light therapy. For a limited time, get a HUGE discount on the iRestore Professional when you use code Savage at iRestore.com Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, town crier, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From infidelity, to iglooing, gay rights to icy Mikes and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

    55 min
  3. With Amanda Knox

    MAY 6

    With Amanda Knox

    Oh boy! A threesome might be brewing! A woman just connected with a hot guy through an app. He has another woman he sees, and the three of them plan to get together. But the caller is convinced that the other two are way more attractive than she is, and she worries she'll feel insecure and inadequate. How can she get over this stinkin' thinkin'? A woman has been in a casual friends-with-benefits relationship. The sex is fantastic. But then he started showing up less and less, and she discovered he gave her an STI. He feels terrible about it, so he's backing away. But she still wants his succulent D! Should she ask him to keep the "benefits" coming, or has she just been friend-zoned? Yes, being friend-zoned is tough stuff, but have you ever been unjustly incarcerated for 4 years in an Italian jail? No? This week's guest Amanda Knox has, and she offers her perspective on relationship problems with humor and grace. She and Dan talk about her prison hustle- how she got by in such hellish conditions, the value of awkwardness, and how to protect yourself when new relationship energy clouds your thinking. Amanda's new book "Free: My Search for Meaning" is out now, and highly recommended. And, a woman has stocked up on abortion medication in case her kids or kids' friend ever need it. But does it expire? Should she find a way to give her MnMs to someone else? Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Liberator: makers of pillows, shapes and furniture for new exciting sex. Go to Liberator.com/Savage or type “Savage” into the search bar for private VIP access to deals that are too good to announce on this podcast! Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at BetterHelp.com/SAVAGE and get on your way to being your best self. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, shaman, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From poppers to MnMs, slut-shaming to SSRIs and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since 1972.

    56 min
  4. Language Barrier at the Orgy

    APR 29

    Language Barrier at the Orgy

    Ooh la la! A young Canadian woman has been living in a European city, making friends and... having group sex. She doesn't speak their language- her friends are usually accommodating and speak English around her. But sometimes when the gang is banging, they revert to their native tongue and she feels left out. Should she let it slide, or let her lovers know she needs dirty talk translation? A woman with high libido has always been monogamous...until now. She reconnected with an old friend who confessed that he had a crush on her. He is in a poly relationship, and has also created a harem of women who he considers his "sluts." Should she let herself be recruited? It sounds hot to her, but a more traditional voice in her head warns her off. On the Magnum, it's the nightmare scenario: A woman's 11 year-old son snooped on her phone and found a cache sex pics starring his mother. Dan brings on Dr. Debby Herbenick, author of "Yes Your Kid" to talk about how and when to get a good conversation going with your kids about sex and privacy. And, it's time for an After Action Report! Andrew and his husband tried going to a jack shack for the first time together. Hear all about it. Have you tried something new recently? Was it great? Was it terrible? Just meh? Super-weird? Send us an email (with the subject line: After Action Report,) and we might contact you to be on the show. Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, healer, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From slut harems, to monogamy, womens rights to parenting and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

    47 min
  5. In Defense of Faking Orgasms

    APR 22

    In Defense of Faking Orgasms

    My what a busy friend! While a woman and her boyfriend were going through a painful, temporary separation, she confided in and was consoled by a male, bi friend of hers. He helped her through the difficult time. But he was also propositioning her ex-boyfriend at the same, damn time! Now that she is back together with her boyfriend, can she trust this friend again? A woman gives a compelling defense of faking orgasms. Will Dan Savage accept it? On the Magnum, Dan welcomes back the thoroughly delightful comedian Zach Zimmerman. They discuss the word "daddy." Is it an honorific that one hurls at another? Or a pre-negotiated, agreed upon role? They also talk about anger in comedy, and the real meaning of tolerance. Zach's comedy special SURPRISE ME debuts on April 22. And, a woman is dating a new guy after ending her old relationship. She is still struggling with the break-up, but she isn’t sure how much to reveal to her new guy about this. When he asks “How are you doing?” should she be honest about missing her ex? Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage. This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now, get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage Unlock your best skin with iRestore. For a limited time, our listeners will enjoy HUGE savings on the iRestore Illumina Face Mask with code Savage at iRestore.com. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, neologism generator and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From pegging, to tolyamory, GGG to santorum and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since Columbo was on TV.

    54 min
  6. Do the Thing

    APR 15

    Do the Thing

    A chill married lesbian is a little annoyed to hear that her consistently straight friend, engaged to a man, has announced that she is pan. She is pan, but she plans to remain monogamous with her husband. What's more, she is throwing herself a coming-out-as-pan party. When the caller came out as lesbian, she got kicked out of the house. Is she an asshole to feel less than exhilarated by her friend's new sexual identity? Yikes! Hear the unpleasant tale of the woman who shut her boyfriend's son's dogs in a room for so long, that they did what dogs do when shut in a room all day. Oh, and as she was cleaning the mess, she saw that the 20 year-old son had a sex toy. On the Magnum, should you be stockpiling poppers? Dan brings on our favorite poppers expert, Adam Zmith, author of Deep Sniff: A History of Poppers and Queer Futures. He explains why gay men use them, a bit of their history, and what to do now that they're in the crosshairs of JFK Jr's FDA. A submissive woman mistakes the swoony feelings she experiences during sub space, for genuine emotional connection. But she doesn't want emotional connection. She just wants to have some tied-up fun. How can she stop her heart from getting all hot and bothered? Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now.  This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipseastories.com/savage.  Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, father, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From poppers, to parenting, kissing to ghosting and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since days of old when magic ruled the air.

    52 min
  7. Legal Advice for Trans Folks

    APR 8

    Legal Advice for Trans Folks

    A gay man and his boyfriend are in an open relationship. His boyfriend forbids the caller from messing around with anyone in their friend group. But this friend group is super-kinky and super-horny, regularly propositioning the caller for naughty fun. It's getting hard to say no... A trans guy still has "female" on his birth certificate. He wonders if it's too dangerous to try to get it changed at this perilous moment, and also if he should be stockpiling testosterone. Dan brings on Diana Adams- the Executive Director of Chosen Family Law Center, to discuss strategy for trans folks. On the Magnum, a promising study just came out about a possible risk reduction for bacterial vaginosis that treats...wait for it...men! Dr. Jen Gunter, an OB/GYN and expert in vulvovaginal conditions is on to talk about this study- a tiny bit of optimism for women's health. A man just got dumped by his new girlfriend. Why? Because he invited her to the Hump! Film Festival. Sounds like he dodged a bullet... Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Liberator: makers of pillows, shapes and furniture for new exciting sex. Go to Liberator.com/Savage or type “Savage” into the search bar for private VIP access to deals that are too good to announce on this podcast! Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage This episode is brought to you by Dame Products, Sex toys designed by Women, For Women. For 20% off your first order, go to Dame.com and use offer code SAVAGE20 Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, lover, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From trans rights, to BDSM, feminism to polyamory and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the Fonz jumped that shark.

    54 min
  8. Dirty Douche Water

    APR 1

    Dirty Douche Water

    A woman has made a new exciting friend! But this friend ditches her other friends and treats them as disposable. Is the caller next? Here's the kind of pragmatic question and answer you've come to expect from the Savage Lovecast: Is it safe to douche with non-potable water? On the Magnum, folks have been asking for a menopause expert for a while now, and we've got her. Dr. Stacy De-Lin has been a proud member of the Planned Parenthood team since 2013. She gives us the basics on peri-menopause, menopause, and how to mitigate the negatives. Women have been chronically under-treated, and there are medications that can help. And, a man living in New Zealand is dating a guy in an open, long-distance relationship. The boyfriend lives in a repressive country where he can't safely be out. The caller enjoys their low stakes, open relationship, but wonders if he should invite him to live together in New Zealand to help him to get a visa and escape. Q@Savage.Love 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders. Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now.  This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage. Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From omni-amory, to monogamy, kink to asexuality, and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since disco made it's debut.

    46 min
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Hosts & Guests

4.6
out of 5
6,007 Ratings

About

Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex and relationship questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, record your question and send it to Q@Savage.Love, or call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

Information

  • Creator
    Dan Savage
  • Years Active
    2006 - 2025
  • Episodes
    52
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2010
  • Show Website
    Savage Lovecast

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