Shut Up Simon

Simon U.

Life's hard. So what? Comedian Simon U. offers profound and arguable useless wisdom for anyone with time to kill. New episodes every Monday.

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    Momma's Bando ft. Chike Robinson

    Folks in the hood(speaking to my ninja's) need therapy the most. Just go see somebody. I swear even tho it's a lot of "therapy talk" in this episode, you will laugh your a$$ off. I'm not sure if any of the platforms care if you curse in the description but all the brand-building videos on youtube got me shook. This week comedian, writer, animator Chike Robinson pulls up. I promise ya'll will enjoy the next 45 mins. We talk about the Migos, how to do w/ separating from your homies, selling bootleg CDs. Whatever we were talking about, it was funny as hell. IG: @shutupsimonpod        @hereschike Watch us on Youtube

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    Mulatto Propoganda ft. @talentharris

    Why do the top 3 biracial rappers all have white mommas? Comedian Talent Harris pulls up to answer this question. We also discuss the best way to lie to our future kids in the age of endless information. IG: @talentharris IG: @shutupsimonpod Twitter: @simonuforreal Watch this episode on Youtube.

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    Box Me Please ft. @electra_telesford

    DID YOU MISS ME???? It's been a while. R.I.P Paul Mooney. His conviction to not just his truth but the truth is the reason he is so respected and coveted. While I was gone I celebrated my two-year stand-up anniversary.  I thought I would've been touring the world playing blues harmonica by this time. My homie Electra(@electra_telly) pulls up cuz she's been in the game about the same amount of time. She's already famous. If you're in Brooklyn, on Wednesdays and want a place to go that will guarantee you dope ass if stories, come to @stankfacecomedy. Wednesdays at Starr Bar- 214 Starr St. Brooklyn, NY @shutupsimonpod @simonuforreal @electra_telly @stankfacecomedy Big thanks to @byasleon for allowing us to record in their shop. Watch this episode on Youtube.

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    Ain't Nothing Special About Being Special ft. @jachukuomotayo

    One time I got mistaken for Pharrell & Bruno Mars in the same day. Okay, maybe not "mistaken for," but I was told I looked like them. They don't even look alike. I thought I was special, but really, I just fit the short light skin, archetype. But that's cool too, both them fools got Grammys.  This week my fashion homie @jachukuomotayo pulls up & we dispel the myth of originality.  IG:shutupsimonpod & @jachukuomotayo Twitter:simonuforreal Watch us on Youtube

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    Don't Leave Your Partner 'Cuz They're a Six

    What if somebody told you that they could give you everything you ever wanted? They promised you, that over the course of your lifetime, all of your wildest dreams can come true. All you had to do was shake their hand and maybe work a little harder but that's about it. You agree, and when you go to shake hands with them, their hand is covered in sh-t? We will always get what we want, never how we want it. IG:shutupsimonpod Twitter:simonuforreal Watch on Youtube.

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    Cone Thugs-N-Harmony ft.@MattMiggz

    A whole lot of jokes this week, with a pinch of life-altering information.  I pulled up on @mattmiggz this week to see what's taking him so long with the best album the world has ever seen.  We also revisit the most offensive names from Flavor of Love, & Ray-J's show where he was looking for a hoochie. People forget that's Brandy's brother. We forty episodes in. I love all ya'll musty a$$e$ IG: @mattmiggz IG: @shutupsimonpod Twitter: @simonuforreal https://youtu.be/4ry8SmY1xY4

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    Nurturing the Inner Lil' Homie

    "If you can remember how you got where you are now, you can figure out the rest." - Simeezy Bruh, I could really start a business making fortune cookies for cajun seafood restaurants. People who enjoy sauteed clam strips appreciate a good anecdote.  In this week's episode, I go into the importance of reconnecting with your inner lil' homie.  s/o to @amerikanheathenog for the drip IG: @shutupsimonpod Twitter: @simonuforreal https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/shut-up-simon/id1509884062  https://open.spotify.com/show/4bilt5MYhEHNqTxzYSD0R7

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    Pop, Lock, & Tok It

    My homie @edwards_eli pulls up to give Simon the skinny on how to be Tik Tok famous so I can move to California and live in a lukewarm hot tub. Also, if she asks you to take your shoes off, you already know what's up. Big thanks to @edwards_eli IG:@shutupsimonpod Twitter:simonuforreal Watch us on Youtube. https://youtu.be/8azHzzVmk5Y https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/shut-up-simon/id1509884062 https://open.spotify.com/show/4bilt5MYhEHNqTxzYSD0R7

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Life's hard. So what? Comedian Simon U. offers profound and arguable useless wisdom for anyone with time to kill. New episodes every Monday.

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