The BythewayitsMensa Show

The ByTheWayItsMensa Show Standards for Wealth, Leadership, and Legacy. The ByTheWayItsMensa Show is a weekly conversation about building a life that's actually yours, wealth, leadership, discipline, legacy, mindset, and freedom, with relationships woven in when the moment calls for it. Hosted by KJ.Mensah, author of Standards, this show speaks first to Africans building a life across two continents and Africans building at home, and just as directly to African American listeners and anyone else navigating the same tension between where you come from and who you're becoming. Some weeks it's a solo teaching episode breaking down a real standard to live by. Other weeks it's a listener's own story, a real coaching session, or an honest answer to a question sent in. No guest required, no filler, no performance. Just real talk about building wealth that lasts, leading without losing yourself, discipline that holds when no one's watching, and the kind of legacy and love worth actually building on purpose. New episodes weekly. Standards you can actually keep.

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  1. Aug 29 ·  Video

    Your People Will Never See Your Worth

    KJ shares the story of the boutique business his in-law pushed him and his wife out of, took everything from, and never paid for, and how that loss made him question his own worth. He breaks down why your value as a person was never tied to income or success, then turns to women who've built a masculine shell to survive life and encourages them to embrace their feminine nature at home. 0:00 The True Meaning of Self-Worth 4:09 Business Failures and Self-Doubt 8:19 The Impact of Society on Self-Perception 11:28 Building Character and Personal Standards 14:24 Embracing Femininity and Personal Growth 18:51 Supporting Women in Building Standards #StandardsBook #KnowYourWorth #CharacterOverMoney #SelfWorth #GhanaianCommunity #AfricanDiaspora #BusinessFailure #FamilyBetrayal #ManhoodMatters #BlackManhood #FeminineEnergy #MasculineEnergy #RelationshipCoach #LifeCoach #MarriedStillMessy #PodcastClips #GhanaianInDiaspora #BuildYourStandards masculine energy, feminine energy, self worth, know your worth, standards book, KJ Mensah, married still messy, relationship coach, life coach, marriage advice, business betrayal, family betrayal, in law problems, business failure story, character over money, feminine energy at home, masculine and feminine dynamics, black manhood, black relationships, Ghanaian diaspora, African diaspora, Ghanaian community, relationship podcast, marriage podcast, podcast clips, dating advice, women and relationships, healing from betrayal, entrepreneurship failure, building your standards, bythewayitsmensa

  2. Aug 22 ·  Video

    This is How You Prevent People From Using You.

    Being used does not start when someone crosses your boundary - it starts when you never built one. Mensa breaks down the uncomfortable truth behind victim-playing, gaslighting, and why people keep pushing until you speak up.This episode is for anyone who feels drained by friendships, relationships, family dynamics, or business situations that keep overstepping the line. Mensa explains why standards come first, boundaries come second, and discipline is what keeps both from collapsing the moment things get uncomfortable.You’ll discover: How to spot the pattern of being used while the other person acts like the victimWhy standards in finance, friendship, relationships, and business protect you before conflict startsThe difference between healthy compromise and compromising your way into stupidityMensa’s “skinny and fat friend” theory and the hidden dynamic it reveals in real lifeA simple step-by-step approach to building discipline without getting overwhelmed by the “mountain” aheadMensa also shares how his book Standards and his coaching process are designed to help you build a stronger internal framework, whether you want to work through it on your own or with guidance. He closes with a practical nightly reflection habit that can help you understand what upsets you, what makes you happy, and what you’re actually learning about yourself.If you’re tired of repeating the same painful patterns and want a clearer way to protect your energy, this conversation gives you a direct framework to start with. Essential listening if you need better boundaries, more self-respect, and the discipline to hold your line.

  3. Jul 24 ·  Bonus Video

    Victim Mindset & Bigger Weddings

    Two Signs You're Setting Yourself Up to Fail. The bigger the wedding, the bigger the divorce — and after doing it twice, I'm telling you why that's not a coincidence. In this episode we get into it: the victim mindset excuse that's holding people back, a hard look at the politics nobody wants to say out loud, and then we go deep on marriage — why a massive wedding is often a red flag, how having kids changes attraction, and the money conversation every couple needs to have before saying "I do." If you're engaged, married, or just trying to understand relationships and money better, this one's for you. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Victim mindset — stop making excuses 01:06 Politics, welfare & personal responsibility 02:55 Corporate America & the mindset trap 05:25 BLM, immigration & who really benefits 07:48 The bigger the wedding, the bigger the divorce 09:51 How kids change attraction (be honest) 12:16 What a "non-negotiable" wedding really tells you 14:37 Final word 🔔 Subscribe for real talk on relationships, money, and building a life that's actually yours. #Marriage #Divorce #Relationships #RealTalk #Wedding #DatingAdvice #RelationshipAdvice #PersonalFinance #Mindset #MarriedLife #Marriage #Divorce #Relationships #Wedding #RealTalk #RelationshipAdvice #DatingAdvice #MarriageAdvice #PersonalFinance #Mindset #VictimMindset #MarriedLife #RelationshipTips #CoupleGoals #RealConversations #PodcastClips #MensPodcast #TruthTalk #LifeAdvice #StandardsForYourLife big wedding divorce, does wedding size predict divorce, marriage advice, relationship advice, real talk podcast, victim mindset, personal responsibility, marriage and money, financial advice for couples, dating advice for men, relationship podcast, wedding red flags, how kids change attraction, marriage tips, divorce statistics, men's advice podcast, standards podcast, KJ Mensah, real talk relationships, engagement red flags, wedding industrial complex, marriage mindset, couples finance, relationship psychology, mens relationship advice

  4. 10/19/2025

    Sarah Fontenot | Gender Roles, Money & Leadership

    All right, welcome back to Conversations. I have a fun pack today. Literally, I think I have about 10 videos, maybe nine or maybe eight. I think it's about nine or 10. So, we have a lot to go through. If you are first time here, I will I would really appreciate it if you you can give this video a thumbs up. If you want to follow, please go ahead follow, hit a subscribe button, hit that notification button. I really appreciate you for that.Are modern women truly submissive—or only when it benefits them?In today’s episode of Conversations, we dive deep into the selective submission debate:Why do some women claim they want a “leader,” but only follow when it’s fun, comfortable, or financially beneficial?We break down viral clips on modern relationships, money dynamics, feminism vs. femininity, and whether submission has become conditional in 2025 dating culture.TIMESTAMP00: 00 Opener , You Are Supposed to Pay your own Bills 06:48 I only Submit To Men with money 16:19 Can your man ask you to change outfit22:04 Combative Women Don't listen to Men28:03 Women Aren't Submissive Anymore Debate on Pop the balloon💬 Topics Covered:The difference between leadership and control in relationshipsSelective submission vs. consistent partnershipWhy money seems to define respect for some womenThird-wave feminism and the rise of gender wars onlineCan a man who earns less still lead a relationship?👊🏽 Join the conversation, drop your thoughts in the comments, and don’t forget to subscribe for more real-talk relationship breakdowns and viral debates. #sarahfontenot #kjmensah #modernrelationships #tonightsconversation #kittarose #SubmissionDebate #genderroles #feminineenergy #masculineenergy #RelationshipTalk #Konversations #DatingPodcast #MoneyAndLove #realtalkhttps://youtu.be/-Yrfx8Iaheo

    Sarah Fontenot | Gender Roles, Money & Leadership
  5. 10/19/2025

    Older Women Are The Problem ?

    ARE MEN HAPPIER WHEN MARRIED WITH KIDS?ARE OLDER WOMEN ARE BITTER BECAUSE THEY RUN OUT OF OPTIONS ?When you know he can’t lead, don’t stay hoping to change him. In this video, KJ Mensah breaks down why dating without direction leads to chaos—and why both men and women lose focus once intimacy starts too soon. We’ll unpack the truth about purpose, leadership, marriage, and why peace—not pleasure—makes men happier.TIMESTAMP00:00 Men are Happier with Family 11:40 Older Women Are Bitter because they run out of options ____________________________________________________PLEASE SEND VIDEO IDEAS TO:TikTok: kj.mensahIG: bythewayitsmensa_____________________________________________________Buy me a drink and support the channel💸CashApp | https://cash.me/$joeykmennPayPal | https://paypal.me/MHFM3nsa_____________________________________________________Hit The LIKE & SUBSCIBE BUTTON GET TO 5000 SUBS!TURN ON YOUR NOTIFICATION 🔔NEW CONTENT DROPPING DAILY_____________________________________________________Disclaimers:Fair use is a legal doctrine that says I can reuse copyright-protected material under certain circumstances without getting permission from the copyright owner.**Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use. No copyright infringement intended. ALL RIGHTS BELONG TO THEIR RESPECTIVE OWNERS**All opinions are my own. This video is for entertainmnet & educational purposes only.I do not own the rights to any vidoes I'm reacting to. I'm only stating my opinion about the video My opinions doesn't make it factsThis Channel and my videos are for educational purposes only.Fair UseCopyright Disclaimer under section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, education and research.Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.Fair Use DefinitionFair use is a doctrine in United States copyright law that allows limited use of copyrighted material without requiring permission from the rights holders, such as commentary, criticism, news reporting, research, teaching or scholarship. It provides for the legal, non-licensed citation or incorporation of copyrighted material in another author’s work under a four-factor balancing test.#ModernRelationships #DatingAdvice #MarriageTalk #KJMensah #PurposeAndPeace #RelationshipPodcast #Masculinity #FeminineEnergyhttps://youtu.be/xx28UmhYtY0

    Older Women Are The Problem ?

Ratings & Reviews

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2 Ratings

About

The ByTheWayItsMensa Show Standards for Wealth, Leadership, and Legacy. The ByTheWayItsMensa Show is a weekly conversation about building a life that's actually yours, wealth, leadership, discipline, legacy, mindset, and freedom, with relationships woven in when the moment calls for it. Hosted by KJ.Mensah, author of Standards, this show speaks first to Africans building a life across two continents and Africans building at home, and just as directly to African American listeners and anyone else navigating the same tension between where you come from and who you're becoming. Some weeks it's a solo teaching episode breaking down a real standard to live by. Other weeks it's a listener's own story, a real coaching session, or an honest answer to a question sent in. No guest required, no filler, no performance. Just real talk about building wealth that lasts, leading without losing yourself, discipline that holds when no one's watching, and the kind of legacy and love worth actually building on purpose. New episodes weekly. Standards you can actually keep.

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