Square Peg Round Hole Timothy Eldred

You don’t want to miss this episode. In my opinion anyway (but I’m biased).
Clearly, I’ve been away from the microphone for a few weeks—much longer than even I expected for sure. But I’ve had good reason. And the lessons I’ve been learning during this hiatus have only helped to strengthen what I’ve been wanting to say to my loyal listeners as I talk openly about my recent experiences. 
As you can ascertain from the title, my emphasis is simple: slow down. Sounds easy. It’s not. It requires a deliberate decision every day. But if we would adhere to this logic, we’d improve our lives and the lives of the people around us—the whole world to be honest. I can’t encourage you enough to listen and apply.
If you’re interested in finding a greater sense of connection and belonging in your life, this is the best 25 minutes you can spend today. I promise!
Thanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.

Sometimes life feels insurmountable. Those are the moments when you don't believe you have the strength or stamina to overcome the obstacles in your path—the seasons when you seriously consider giving up.

You're not alone. We all face seasons in life when molehills feel like mountains. But there's always hope if we will learn to pause long enough to catch our breath and recalibrate to do the climb that lies ahead of us.

When you don't feel confident or capable, you should tell yourself a different story with a better ending than the one you imagine. In this episode, I want to share some ABCs to help motivate you to keep moving.



Thanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.

"If it doesn't bring you peace, profit, or purpose, then don't give it your time, energy, or attention." —Unknown

I posted that quote on social media over the last few days. As you might suppose, the response was affirming. Because it just makes sense, right? 

So why does such simple wisdom appear to be so difficult to implement in our lives? Why do we give our time, energy, and attention away so easily?

I tackle these questions in this episode and attempt to offer some practical suggestions that can provide perspective we can all implement.
Thanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.

No one likes to admit the possibility they might create the majority of their own problems or that they are the source of their own pain. Even considering the idea is slightly embarrassing. Or shameful.

But is it true?

I hate to be the one to tell you, but it’s true. Most of our pain is self-inflicted.

Deliberately? Not usually. Inadvertently? Most likely.

Until we even ponder that possibility, we'll continue to suffer unnecessarily in areas completely within our control. This is true for both our internal and external battles. And it's especially true for our relational challenges and well-being.

Our personal struggles—private and public—are more solvable than we can imagine when we learn to recognize the signs of emotional self-harm. In this episode, Timothy Eldred unpacks three easily-remedied, self-harm behaviors that can improve your life once you learn to recognize the signs. They might be easier to change than you think.

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SHOW NOTES

During the episode, Tim addresses some self-harm behaviors. Here's a list of the three he mentions and a few more to consider for your life:
PretendingSharing with people who can't support you*Not asking for what you need*Judging yourself harshlyBeing inauthenticThinking negatively about yourselfPreoccupying yourself with other people's livesExpecting things to be perfectAllowing fear to stop youChoosing to remain silentComplaining without changing what you can control*If you have thoughts or questions about any of these behaviors, please send an email to: podcast@timothyeldred.com.  We may address them in a future episode for everyone's benefit. Your voice matters, and we always appreciate hearing from you.

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Here are additional resources you may want to read for insight into this issue:
https://myonlinetherapy.com/emotional-self-harm/https://themighty.com/topic/self-harm/types-of-self-harmhttps://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2020/6/can-self-harm-be-emotionalhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/happiness-is-state-mind/201908/emotional-self-harm-people-pleasing-can-ruin-your-happinessThanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.

Does that title sound a bit harsh? Well, it is certainly abrupt. Why? Because sometimes there's no sugarcoating the truth. And the truth can hurt. But there are times we need someone to speak boldly and get our attention. That's what I hope to do for us in this episode. 

My goal is to both challenge and encourage us all to remember the power we possess—the power of choice. We can choose what we listen to. And who we listen to. We have control over our minds and our mouths. So instead of getting all wound up with all the news and noise of the world and believing the worst about ourselves and others, perhaps it's time to learn to wind down. Especially in light of the growing anxiety people are experiencing today.

So shut up and relax isn't just a title. It's a prescription to reclaim your life.


Thanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.

We overthink.

And the thoughts bouncing around in our brains shape our world and become our reality. We also take life too seriously. Is it any wonder we are so emotionally stressed and uptight? 

What would happen if we chose to relax, care less, and see life as a beautiful gift? Because it is precisely that, my friends. That truth is available for everyone to experience every single day.

You don't have to take everything so serious or let others' thoughts dictate your days which means you don’t have to:
Pretend to agree with everyoneTake responsibility for how others feelApologize oftenAlways say yesFeel uncomfortable if someone disapproves of youAct like the people around youNeed praise to feel goodGo to great lengths to avoid conflictSuccumb to the pressure of fitting inBelieve you are less than othersTolerate toxic peopleThe choice to abandon these behaviors is 100% yours. No one else controls you. But only you can lighten up and stop overthinking. With that list in mind, here are a couple of questions:
Who is the person I am being in my life and showing the world? And how much of that person is the truth of who I am?How am I using my public persona to hide my authentic self, and why do I feel the need to hide it?Do I feel a disconnection between the person I pretend to be in the world and the person I connect with more deeply inside myself?What would it look like for me to take off the mask and live more authentically?I'm excited for you to listen today and find some long-needed freedom on your path to living with authenticity in an artificial world.
Thanks for listening. Please follow on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. You can learn more about Tim here.