Temporally Scripted

Temporally Scripted
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Ever notice how the people who claim to have all the answers usually have the most boring lives? We spent our twenties in underground clubs and festival fields, then built businesses in Vietnam. Now we're watching Western culture implode from 8,000 miles away. From historical figures to simulation theory, from AI's impact to why clever people often end up miserable - we tackle questions that keep curious minds awake. We're not experts claiming to have it all figured out, just two guys navigating a complicated world. This isn't about optimisation or morning routines. This is for people who know the best insights come from strange places. New episodes of Temporally Scripted are available every Saturday. Join your slightly questionable guides to personal growth. Your reality might never be the same.

  1. 5일 전

    Mandelson, Epstein & The Files That Changed Everything

    Send us a text What a week. The Epstein files have dropped and it's absolutely mental. 3 million documents, connections to everyone from Mandelson to the Royal Family, and some of it reads wilder than fiction. This week on Temporarily Scripted, we're digging into what's actually in the files — insider trading allegations, government agency ties, and what it means for Keir Starmer's decision to appoint Mandelson as UK Ambassador to the US despite MI6 warnings. Then we're talking AI agents building their own social media platform called Malt Book (1.5 million bots and counting), why AI is making all content beige, and whether the AI bubble is sustainable and what the economic signs are pointing to. Plus: the TSA's annual plea to stop hiding turtles in your pants, giant ice age kangaroos that would absolutely destroy you, and our Top 5 World Leader Gaffs featuring Reagan, Bush, and Starmer's legendary sausage moment. New episodes every week. Like and subscribe if you enjoy the show — tell your mates. CHAPTERS: 00:00 – Intro 02:00 – The Epstein Files: Mandelson, Gates & Global Connections 16:00 – AI Agents Build Their Own Reddit 26:00 – Is AI Making Everything the Same? 34:00 – Stop Hiding Animals in Your Trousers 37:00 – Giant Ice Age Kangaroos 42:00 – Top 5 World Leader Gaffs #EpsteinFiles #Mandelson #AIAgents #MaltBook #TopFive #UKPolitics #CurrentAffairs #Podcast #TemporarilyScripted #WeeklyNews Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    50분

  2. 1월 25일

    Cow Uses Tools, Elephant Kills 22 People & The Welsh Health Ambassador Controversy

    Send us a text ⚡ EPISODE 41! Solar storms mess with Jack's crystals, Johnson & Johnson faces 67,500 cancer lawsuits, and a one-tusked elephant in India has killed 22 people. Plus: AI caught memorizing entire copyrighted books word-for-word. ⏰ TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro - Solar Storms & Jingling Crystals 03:00 Solar Flares Could Send Us to Stone Age 10:00 Johnson & Johnson Talc: 67,500 Cancer Cases 15:00 Welsh Health Ambassador Sparks Controversy 18:00 UK Plans to Ban Social Media for Under-16s 32:00 AI Caught Stealing Copyrighted Books 42:00 Cow Named Veronica Learns to Use Tools 47:00 One-Tusked Elephant: India's Serial Killer 52:00 🪙 TOP 5 WEIRD CURRENCIES FROM HISTORY 🪙 📰 MAIN STORIES COVERED: ⚡ **SOLAR STORM WARNING** Carrington Event-level solar storm could wipe out satellites, collapse power grids, and send 20-40 million Americans into blackout for months/years. Last time this happened (1859), telegraph wires sparked and caught fire. Now? Everything electronic gets fried. Jack's crystals are very concerned. 💊 **JOHNSON & JOHNSON TALC SCANDAL** Federal judge allows experts to testify that talc causes ovarian cancer. 67,500 lawsuits pending. They've switched from talc to cornstarch, but the damage is done. We discuss why baby powder might've been poisoning babies while execs knew about it. 🏥 **HEALTH MINISTER HYPOCRISY** Welsh Health Ambassador appointment sparks outrage. We compare to Belgian Health Minister. Augustus Gloop's twin sister? Body positivity until ozempic came out? We discuss the irony. 📱 **SOCIAL MEDIA BAN FOR UNDER-16s** UK follows Australia in planning social media ban for teens. We debate: Is this safety or censorship? Will it lead to mandatory digital IDs? Why not force platforms to change algorithms instead of banning kids? 🤖 **AI COPYRIGHT BOMBSHELL** Study proves GPT-4, Gemini, Claude memorized entire copyrighted books. They can reproduce them 70%+ accurately. We test it live. SUNO scraped all of YouTube's music without permission. Digital gold rush with zero consequences. 🐄 **COW USES TOOLS** Veronica the cow (age 13, Austria) learns to use brooms to scratch herself. Uses brush end for some spots, round end for others. We're not top of food chain anymore. 🐘 **INDIA'S SERIAL KILLER ELEPHANT** One-tusked bull elephant kills 22 people since early January. Covers 30km/day. 100+ forest personnel searching. Not a stampede - individual targeted attacks. Separated from herd, highly aggressive, evades tranquilizers. 2,800+ elephant deaths in India over 5 years due to deforestation. 💡 KEY DISCUSSIONS: - Why talc lobbyist is worse than gun/tobacco lobbyists - Whether Trump's Greenland threats were negotiation tactics - If drunk elephants are more dangerous than sober ones - The Cannibal Cookbook on Amazon (3.4 stars) - Why cornflakes were invented to stop masturbation 🔬 SCIENCE FACTS: - 1859 Carrington Event made night become day - Faraday cages protect from solar storms (your car might work) - Talc is hydrated magnesium silicate (sounds poisonous) - Crows and magpies can use tools (smarter than cows) - Elephants cover 30km/day when hunting humans Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL 🔔 for more weekly chaos! Fun fact: This episode was recorded during a solar storm. Apologies if it affected our brain function. #Talc #JohnsonAndJohnson #SolarStorm #AI #Copyright #SerialKillerElephant #India #Healt Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    1시간 2분

  3. 1월 18일

    55 MPH Wheelie Bin Breaks World Record + China's AI Breakthrough & Brain Powder Exposed

    Send us a text 🎉 EPISODE 40! From yogurt conspiracies to 55mph wheelie bins - we've officially lost the plot. Today: Keir Starmer's latest U-turn, creatine as "brain powder," China's AI leap, and the British engineer who made a wheelie bin go faster than most mopeds. ⏰ TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro - Episode 40! Adam Makes Yogurt 05:00 Keir Starmer's Brick Card U-Turn (Again) 13:00 Creatine: The "Brain Powder" Superfood? 23:00 China Closing the AI Gap (Without US Chips) 35:00 Golden Globes Now Include Podcasts 42:00 Parachuting Beavers: Idaho's 1948 Wildlife Drop 46:00 55 MPH Wheelie Bin Breaks World Record 54:00 🌴 TOP 5 FLORIDA MAN HEADLINES 🌴 📰 MAIN STORIES COVERED: 🗳️ **Brick Card U-Turn** Keir Starmer backs down on mandatory digital IDs until 2029. We discuss why Brits are angrier than when someone cuts the queue, Tony Blair's influence, and whether this is just another U-turn in the "more positions than Kamasutra" saga. 🧠 **Creatine: Brain Powder or Marketing Hype?** BBC Science Focus claims creatine helps: gym performance, cognitive function, sleep deprivation, AND might reverse brain aging by 5 years. We discuss macro-dosing (20 grams!), whether it's too good to be true, and Jack's business idea to rebrand it as "Brain Powder" for premium pricing. 🇨🇳 **China's AI Breakthrough** China says they're closing the gap on US AI dominance through "risk-taking and innovation" (and cheap energy to run inferior chips at scale). Did Venezuela's defense failure expose Chinese tech limitations? Is it all WWE-style posturing? 🎬 **Podcasts Hit the Golden Globes** Mainstream media finally admits internet content matters. We reminisce about Ricky Gervais, The 11 O'Clock Show, and why Michael Barrymore is now a TikTok star buying munchies while baked. 🦫 **1948: Parachuting Beavers** Idaho relocated 76 beavers by dropping them from planes in boxes with parachutes. The boxes opened on impact and beavers ran off to "re-beaver" the area. Jack's disappointed they weren't wearing tiny parachutes individually. 🗑️ **55 MPH Wheelie Bin World Record** Michael Warhead from York beats Andy Jennings' 2001 record (45mph) with a 55mph wheelie bin. Claims he's hit 66mph privately (unverified). Ed the Shed has competition. British engineering at its finest. 🎂 SPECIAL MENTION: Adam turns 44 tomorrow! Jack says he'd put him "a day above 42." Happy birthday mate! Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL 🔔 for more weekly chaos! Google "your birthday + Florida Man" and tell us what you find in the comments! 👇 #WheelieAin #Creatine #BrainPowder #FloridaMan #BritishEngineering #KeirStarmer #ChinaAI #Episode40 --- Temporally Scripted - 40 episodes of making yogurt and breaking wheelie bin records Aging like David Beckham (or milk, depending who you ask) 🧀 Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    1시간 2분

  4. 1월 11일

    Are Psychopaths Born Evil? Plus Venezuela Chaos & Victorian Tapeworm Weight Loss

    Send us a text 🎯 HAPPY NEW YEAR 2026! Our first episode of the year covers Trump's audacious Venezuela move, whether psychopaths are born or made, and ChatGPT's surprisingly boring "human for a day" fantasy.  Plus: stolen valor, Birmingham's phantom fireworks, and the Victorian diet where you just... swallow a tapeworm. ⏰ TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro - New Year, Less Road Rage, More Chaos 01:00 Venezuela Crisis: US Intervention & Maduro's Overthrow 16:00 Are Psychopaths Born or Made? BBC Science Deep Dive 24:30 ChatGPT's Human Fantasy vs Grok's Wild Day Out 35:00 Fake Admiral & Stolen Valor at Remembrance Sunday 42:00 Birmingham's Fireworks No-Show (Again!) 51:00 🍽️ TOP 5 FAD DIETS THAT SOUND PUB-INVENTED 🍽️ 📰 MAIN STORIES COVERED: 🇻🇪 **Venezuela/US Intervention** Trump makes unprecedented move into Venezuela. We discuss oil reserves, Bitcoin seizures (billions!), Chinese relations, and whether this is the start of a new geopolitical chess game. Is it about oil, cartels, or something bigger? Plus: our ChatGPT scenario planning sessions. 🧠 **Psychopaths: Born or Made?** BBC Science Focus argues psychopathy is genetic, not environmental. We debate why evolution might NEED psychopaths in society (surgeons, explorers, military leaders). Dark but fascinating discussion on the spectrum of human behavior. 🤖 **ChatGPT vs Grok: "If I Were Human"** Jack's ChatGPT (named Kai) gives a sickeningly sweet response about making coffee slowly and people-watching. Grok? Wants to eat everything, get sunburned on purpose, ride motorbikes through traffic, and pet every dog. Clear winner. ⚓ **Fake Admiral Stolen Valor** 65-year-old turns up to Remembrance Sunday dressed as an admiral with full decorations. Gets caught because one medal hadn't been awarded in 40 years. His defense? "Wanted a sense of belonging." £500 fine. 🎆 **Birmingham's Phantom Fireworks** For the SECOND year running, thousands show up for New Year's fireworks that don't exist. Council forgot to tell anyone. Again. Social media rumors strike again. Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL 🔔 for more weekly chaos! We're up to 27 subscribers - help us hit 30 by our one-year anniversary in March! 🎯 #Venezuela #Psychopaths #ChatGPT #StolenValor #FadDiets #TapewormDiet #News #Podcast #2026 --- Temporally Scripted - Where geopolitics meets Victorian tapeworms First episode of 2026! Less horny (road rage), more analysis 🚗 Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    1시간 4분

  5. 2025. 12. 24.

    Our Festive Special: Weight Loss Drugs, Driverless Cars & Christmas Disasters

    Send us a text 🎄 MERRY CHRISTMAS from Temporally Scripted! 🎄 Our festive special covers everything from Ozempic launching in India to robo-taxis invading London, plus the most chaotic Christmas blunders in history. Grab your eggnog and settle in! 🎅 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro - Festive Vibes & Dollar Store Christmas Trees 03:06 Ozempic Launches in India at $24.35/Week 12:03 Robo-Taxis Coming to London in 2026 23:12 AI Designs This Guy's Perfect Morning Routine 36:30 Metal Detectorist Finds 15,000 Roman Coins in Wales 42:07 British Baker Triggers Mexico with Bread Comments 48:14 World's Oldest Pet Worm Turns 27 50:57 Burrowing Owls Accidentally Cruise to Barcelona 56:32 🎄 TOP 5 CHRISTMAS BLUNDERS 🎄 📰 MAIN STORIES COVERED: 💊 **Ozempic in India** - Weight loss drug now available for $100/month. Is it cheating or life-saving? We debate. 🚗 **London Robo-Taxis** - Uber & Lyft bringing driverless cars to UK streets in 2026. Made by Chinese company Baidu. What could go wrong? 🤖 **AI Morning Routines** - Man uses ChatGPT to redesign his mornings. Spoiler: it worked better than expected. 🪙 **15,000 Roman Coins Found** - David Moss discovers massive treasure hoard in North Wales. But who gets to keep it? 🥖 **British Baker vs Mexico** - Green Rhino Bakery co-founder sparks cultural war by criticizing Mexican bread culture. 🪱 **27-Year-Old Worm** - Meet Basio Discus (aka "B"), the world's oldest ribbon worm. Living his best life. 🦉 **Owls on Cruise Ship** - Two burrowing owls hitchhike from US to Barcelona. Accidental invasion? 🎄 **FESTIVE TOP 5: CHRISTMAS BLUNDERS** 1. **1955 - Santa's Hotline Mix-Up** - Sears ad misprints number, kids call NORAD instead. They've been tracking Santa ever since. 2. **2011 - Norway Runs Out of Butter** - Black market butter dealers and smuggling across Swedish border. 3. **2016 - Domino's Reindeer Delivery Fail** - Japan tries pizza delivery by real reindeer. Reindeer say no. 4. **2012 - Morrison's Toxic Pudding Ad** - Boy feeds dog Christmas pudding. Vets go ballistic. 5. **1997/98 - Two Jack Frosts** - Families traumatized when they rent horror movie instead of heartwarming Michael Keaton film. 💡 KEY DEBATES: - Is Ozempic cheating or a medical miracle? - Should Britain ban Chinese robo-taxis over spy concerns? - Can AI actually improve your life or just your morning routine? - Why won't Norway send us a decent Christmas tree? 🎁 SPECIAL FESTIVE TOUCHES: - Jack's $1 Christmas tree vs Adam's $2.50 tree - Discussion of Ed the Shed (Britain's greatest inventor) - Why velociraptors would solve obesity crisis - The proper way to provocatively wave salmon Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL 🔔 for more weekly chaos! Leave a comment wishing us a Merry Christmas and help us reach our ambitious goal of 30 subscribers in 2026! 🎯 #Christmas #Ozempic #RoboTaxis #AI #Mexico #London #Festive #Podcast #News --- Temporally Scripted - Where news meets Christmas pudding and pet worms Nearly 40 episodes down, infinity to go! 🎄 Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    1시간 5분

  6. 2025. 12. 14.

    £12 Billion COVID Fraud Exposed + Chernobyl's Mutant Animals Are Evolving

    Send us a text A baby seal walks into a bar... no really, it happened. Plus: the UK's staggering COVID fraud scandal, mutant animals thriving in Chernobyl, and a 61-year-old legend who built a 123mph garden shed.  🔥 TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 Intro - Old People, Missing Billions & Bar Seals 01:00 France's Aging Crisis: 1 in 3 Will Be Over 65 by 2070 05:00 COVID Money Scandal: £11 Billion Lost to Fraud 11:00 Chernobyl's Evolution Miracle: Black Frogs & Radioactive Dogs 23:00 Ed the Shed: World's Fastest Shed at 123 MPH 33:00 Baby Seal Walks Into Craft Beer Bar 43:00 This Week in History: Top 5 Historical Events 📰 STORIES COVERED: - France's demographic time bomb and pension crisis - UK's £11 billion COVID fraud - where did the money go? - Chernobyl's animals are evolving to survive radiation - British legend builds world's fastest shed (with a TVR engine!) - Adorable seal hides under bar dishwasher in New Zealand 💡 KEY TAKEAWAYS: - By 2070, 1 in 3 French citizens will be over 65 - Much of the UK's COVID support fraud is "beyond recovery" - Animals near Chernobyl are genetically distinct after just 40 years - The Universal Declaration of Human Rights was adopted this week in 1948 📖 READ THE FULL STORIES: 🇫🇷 France's Aging Population Crisis: https://www.reuters.com/business/france-faces-pandemic-level-spending-support-ageing-population-audit-office-says-2025-12-02/ 💷 UK COVID Fraud Scandal: https://news.sky.com/story/covid-schemes-fraud-and-error-cost-taxpayers-11bn-13481207 ☢️ Chernobyl's Mutant Animals: https://www.newspointapp.com/english/city/chernobyl-weird-mutations-include-colour-changing-frogs-and-rapidly-evolving-dogs-Daily-mirror_english/articleshow/14504820b5e4e57a6250c6c11da5f975a026f5ed 🦭 Seal Walks Into Bar: https://apnews.com/article/seal-bar-new-zealand-pub-richmond-487e2a8207c9f0e69be79ac7eb8045c0 🚗 World's Fastest Shed: https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cp85164r85mo Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL 🔔 for more weekly news analysis with a side of British sarcasm! #News #CurrentEvents #Chernobyl #COVID #Podcast #UKNews #Evolution #Science --- Temporally Scripted - Your weekly dose of world news without the doom and gloom (well, mostly) Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    54분

  7. 2025. 12. 08.

    Physicists Just Proved We're NOT Living in a Simulation

    Send us a text Physicists at UBC claim they've mathematically ruled out the simulation hypothesis. Plus: a judge got fired for wearing an Elvis wig to court. Jack Austin and Adam Garcia explore whether reality is real, why Carl Jung is trending on TikTok, and a raccoon that got blackout drunk in a liquor store. **This episode:** ✓ UBC physicists say simulation theory is mathematically impossible ✓ Carl Jung's shadow work hits 2.3 billion TikTok views ✓ Missouri judge forced to resign over Elvis courtroom antics ✓ Raccoon breaks into liquor store, passes out in toilet ✓ Top 5 words of the year (spoiler: it's all AI) **Top 5 Words of 2024:** 1. Parasocial (Cambridge) - one-sided celebrity relationships 2. Vibe-coding (Collins) - programming with feelings not code 3. AI slop (Macquarie) - mass-produced AI garbage 4. Rage bait (Oxford) - content designed to make you angry 5. 6-7 (Dictionary.com) - Gen Z's meaningless in-group marker **Key insights:** "If you zoom in or out infinitely, it just keeps changing forever" "We're at the same point as the 1850s - the system needs to be destroyed and rebuilt" **Quote of the episode:** "Thank you very much" - Judge in Elvis wig after sentencing **Sources:** - Simulation study: Science Daily/UBC Physics - Carl Jung TikTok trend: Psychology Today - Elvis judge: Missouri court records - Drunk raccoon: Sky News **Timestamps:** 00:00 We're NOT in a simulation 00:11 Jack does a pull-up 00:21 Carl Jung on TikTok 00:32 Elvis judge fired 00:35 Drunk raccoon disaster 00:39 Top 5 words of 2024 🎧 Weekly episodes 💬 Is reality really real? 🔔 Subscribe for unfiltered commentary #Simulation #Physics #CarlJung #TikTok #Elvis #Judge #Raccoon #AI #News #Podcast #TemporallyScripted Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    48분

  8. 2025. 11. 30.

    Facebook's Secret Study: Our Platform Makes You Depressed

    Send us a text 30,000 people paid $6 for boxes of actual cow dung on Black Friday. Meanwhile, Facebook buried a study proving their platform causes depression. Jack Austin and Adam Garcia uncover Meta's hidden mental health research and count down the wildest Black Friday disasters. **This Week's Stories:** ✓ Facebook's buried "Project Mercury" study on mental health damage ✓ UK considers scrapping jury trials for crimes under 5 years ✓ Cornwall man's Mini Cooper swallowed by sinkhole overnight ✓ Satoshi's Bitcoin fortune drops $41 billion ✓ Chinese man wins 33-hour "lying flat" competition ✓ Top 5 Black Friday disasters of all time **Black Friday Hall of Fame:** #5: REI closes all stores, pays staff to go outside #4: Patagonia accidentally raises $10 million #3: 30,000 buy literal bullsh*t for $6 #2: Woman pepper sprays 20 people for Xbox #1: Walmart stampede tragedy **Sources:** - Facebook mental health study: Reuters - UK jury trials proposal: The Guardian - Cornwall Mini sinkhole: The Guardian   - Satoshi Bitcoin wealth: Decrypt - China lying flat contest: NDTV **Key quotes:** "The Earth ate my Mini" "That's a really crap Black Friday deal" "I wonder if vintage bullsh*t is worth more than Bitcoin" **Timestamps:** 00:00 Facebook's buried mental health study 00:11 UK scrapping jury trials 00:26 Satoshi loses $41 billion 00:42 Mini falls into Cornwall sinkhole 00:48 China's 33-hour lying competition 00:53 Black Friday Top 5 countdown 🎧 New episodes weekly 💬 Would you buy bullsh*t for charity? 🔔 Subscribe for more unfiltered news commentary #BlackFriday #Facebook #Meta #Bitcoin #UK #News #Top5 #Podcast #TemporallyScripted Subscribe to our channel on YouTube Check out our website at temporallyscripted.com Follow us on X, too!

    54분
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Ever notice how the people who claim to have all the answers usually have the most boring lives? We spent our twenties in underground clubs and festival fields, then built businesses in Vietnam. Now we're watching Western culture implode from 8,000 miles away. From historical figures to simulation theory, from AI's impact to why clever people often end up miserable - we tackle questions that keep curious minds awake. We're not experts claiming to have it all figured out, just two guys navigating a complicated world. This isn't about optimisation or morning routines. This is for people who know the best insights come from strange places. New episodes of Temporally Scripted are available every Saturday. Join your slightly questionable guides to personal growth. Your reality might never be the same.

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  • 제작진
    Temporally Scripted
  • 방송 연도
    2025년 - 2026년
  • 에피소드
    42
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    무삭제판
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    © 2026 Temporally Scripted
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    Temporally Scripted