Bring Me The Axe! Horror Podcast

Bryan and David White
  • 4.7 (66)
  • FILM REVIEWS
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Bring Me the Axe is a comedy podcast celebrating the best (and worst) horror from a time when the video store ruled the night. Every other week, brothers Bryan and Dave White (and the occasional guest) heed the call of nostalgia and evaluate the classic 70s and 80s horror movies they loved in their childhood to determine whether the movies are still relevant today or should be allowed to fade into obscurity.

  1. 1D AGO

    105: Night School

    This week we're bringing it home to Boston for a look at the 1981 slasher movie also-ran. Night School. Similar to the many, many slasher movies that dropped that year, Night School struggles to commit to the stalk and slash body count mayhem that was dominating box offices and instead lands closer, remarkably closer to an Italian giallo. When it's not shamelessly stepping on Psycho's toes it reminds us a little too much of What Have You Done To Solange and What Have They Done To Your Daughters. In Night School a killer stalks the Beacon Hill neighborhood of Boston, decapitating women. Their targets all share one thing in common, they're all students at the same night school, sharing the same head hunter obsessed anthropology professor who is busily seducing each one of them. It's up to smarty pants Boston PD detective Judd Austin to put the pieces together and crack the case before the killer strikes again! Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 53m

  2. APR 13

    99CR 56: Ninja Terminator

    This week we take a look at what is arguably Godfrey Ho's magnum opus as far as that director can have such a thing. We're watching Ninja Terminator from 1986, just one of scores of cheap, trashy martial arts movies made in the 1980s by Godfrey Ho in order to capitalize on the western appetite for all things ninja. Ho is famous for a technique of cut and paste filmmaking where he would cut out all the good parts of an Asian action movie, shoot some wraparound footage with western actors, and dub the whole thing over with a new audio track to make a new movie. Sort of. Plus ninjas. In this one, Ho casts Richard Harrison as Master Ninja Harry who, along with some friends, absconds with three pieces of a statue sacred to the Ninja Empire. When one of them are killed and the Ninja Empire recovers one piece, the other two ninjas conspire to keep the pieces away in order reform the ninja empire. Maybe? Harry enlists his friend Jaguar Wong to seek out the missing piece and a whole lot of crazy b******t happens in the meantime. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 21m

  3. APR 6

    104: Curtains

    This week we're heading north to the 51st state of Canada for a listener request. It's Curtains, the 1983 slasher film from producer Peter Simpson who last brought you the smash hit Prom Night. Directed (partially) by cinematographer Richard Ciupka, Curtains is a gigantic mess of a whodunnit that had ambitions to be a North American riff on the movies of Dario Argento and Mario Bava, an arty, very European approach to a violent murder mystery in the giallo style. Unfortunately, this was not what the producers expected and Ciupka bailed on the entiree project leaving it on the shelf for a year before Simpson himself took it down and dragged it across the finish line. In Curtains five young women gather at the home of director John Stryker, a megalomaniac auteur director with designs on producing a film called Audra but not that long ago he was planning on producing it with his muse, Samantha Sherwood who had herself committed to a mental hospital for research. While inside, Stryker moved on from her but now she's out and pissed off. But what's this? A mysterious killer is knocking them all off one by one. You think you know who the killer is, but do you really? Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 37m

  4. APR 1

    103: April Fool's Day (Bonus)

    We're just full of surprises, aren't we? We're hitting you with a bonus episode for April Fool's Day where nothing is what it seems. Who can you trust? What's real? Is all of this just one big set up for an unexpected outcome? It's a listener request, no less, and Dave is just more than happy to take us through one of his favorite genre movies. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 26m

  5. MAR 30

    99CR 55: They Live w/guest Jon Lee Brody

    This week we're joined by our friend Jon Lee Brody of the That Was Pretty Scary podcast for a look at John Carpenter's last movie of the 1980s, They Live. In this evergreen social commentary, Carpenter presents a world very much like our own where the only class distinction is rich and poor and as it would turn out, the rich aren't even human. In They Live a homeless man with no name drifts into Los Angeles looking for work and stumbles into a conspiracy by an underground of the underclasses to fight back against the elite wealth class which rules the world with fantastic technology that keeps humanity asleep while hidden aliens loot the earth of its resources, leaving the rest of us poor and at one another's throats for what crumbs they afford us. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 56m

  6. MAR 23

    102: The Lost Boys w/guest Peaches Christ

    This week we're joined by the legendary drag queen Peaches Christ to talk about Joel Schumacher's landmark 1987 vampire movie, The Lost Boys, starring Jason Patric, Corey Haim, and Kiefer Sutherland. The Lost Boys marked a radical new direction for vampires that took Tony Scott's sexy goth approach in The Hunger and injected with the MTV sensibilities of late-80s teen culture. Paired with incredible night time photography and killer soundtrack, it is as close to perfect as a horror movie can get. Brothers Michael and Sam Emerson are moved to the seaside town of Santa Carla, California with their mother. It's your average boardwalk town with one mean exception: people go missing here at a much higher rate than most other places in the country. When Michael is brought into a group of wild weirdos that live by night it falls to Sam and the weirdo Frog Brothers to deal with Santa Carla's real problem: vampires. Peaches Christ is one of the busiest guests we've ever booked. Visit https://peacheschrist.com/ to keep up with all the goings on and make sure you listen to Midnight Mass. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 58m

  7. MAR 16

    99CR 54: Cyborg

    In this episode we look at the 1989 Jean Claude Van Damme movie that thrust JCVD into the limelight of 90's action movie super stars while simultaneously hammering the final nail into the Golan Globus coffin. At one time a Hollywood powerhouse, Cannon Films flew too close to the sun and found themselves undone by their own machinery. Cyborg was the ultimate result of this failure, a movie thrown together from the unused costumes and sets from unproduced movies. In the not-too distant future, mankind is reduced to medieval state by some unspecified disaster and if that's not bad enough, the survivors are being killed off by a pandemic plague. Luckily, the last scientists on earth developed a cure but need some pieces of the puzzle brought back from New York City. They turn one of their own into a cyborg and send her to get it but evil pirates kill off her escort and strand her there. Lucky for her, here comes Gibson Rickenbacher, a slinger who can fight back against the pirates and get her back to her lab. It's a real dumb good time. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 31m

  8. MAR 13

    101: Friday the 13th Part 6 - Jason Lives (Bonus)

    He's back! The man behind the mask! Friday the 13th is keeping us busy this year with two in two months and another on the way. This time we're taking a look at 1986's Jason Lives, the movie that canned the original plan to have Tommy Jarvis take up the machete and establishes Jason Voorhees as a lumbering, unstoppable killing machine from beyond the grave! In this movie Tommy Jarvis skips the mental hospital he's been confined at to return to Crystal Lake, since renamed to Forest Green in order to shake its horrible reputation. His mission: dig up the body of Jason Voorhees, who has haunted him since he was a little kid, and make sure that he's dead. But when Tommy's obsession overlaps with an electrical storm, a bolt of lightning strikes the body of Jason and brings him back from the grave once again to kill everyone in sight. Now it's up to Tommy to face his fears and put Jason back in the ground for good. When A New Beginning hit theaters it did characteristically well in box office but faced a significant problem with fans: They hated the new direction. They came for Jason and they left with Tommy and everyone hated it. So Frank Mancuso Jr., now a little preoccupied with his War of the Worlds and Friday the 13th TV shows, left the entire project in the hands of writer and director Tom McLoughlin with one clear directive: Do whatever you want but bring back Jason. Join the Bring Me The Axe Discord: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://discord.gg/snkxuxzJ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support Bring Me The Axe! on Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://patreon.com/bringmetheaxepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Buy Bring Me The Axe merch here:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.bonfire.com/store/bring-me-the-axe-podcast/⁠⁠

    1h 25m
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4.7
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66 Ratings

About

Bring Me the Axe is a comedy podcast celebrating the best (and worst) horror from a time when the video store ruled the night. Every other week, brothers Bryan and Dave White (and the occasional guest) heed the call of nostalgia and evaluate the classic 70s and 80s horror movies they loved in their childhood to determine whether the movies are still relevant today or should be allowed to fade into obscurity.

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