79 episodes

Comedians Frank Garcia-Hejl & Geoff Garlock (and the occasional special guest) go through the canon of films created by one of the BEST production companies of the ’80s: The Cannon Films Group!

The Cannon Canon The Cannon Canon

    • Comedy
    • 5.0 • 34 Ratings

Comedians Frank Garcia-Hejl & Geoff Garlock (and the occasional special guest) go through the canon of films created by one of the BEST production companies of the ’80s: The Cannon Films Group!

    ARGENTOBER: THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE

    ARGENTOBER: THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE

    We're halfway through ARGENTOBER! And today we're talkin' about Argento's wildly impressive debut film, The Bird with the Crystal Plumage. We HIGHLY recommend you watch this movie before listening (we hope you do this with every movie we cover). The Cannon Bros (Frank and Geoff) veer into "film theory", the protagonist's wild lack of awareness of JUST how good his life is and even Dudley Moore makes a cameo. Geoff also shamefully spills his guts about his dirty little 900 number addiction as a sick, depraved and perverted young man while Frank was calling a Heathcliff hotline. 

    And once again...Dario Argento HATES CATS! 

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    • 2 hr 6 min
    ARGENTOBER: INFERNO (w/ David Bluvband)

    ARGENTOBER: INFERNO (w/ David Bluvband)

    "ROSE! I CAN'T HEAR YOU. ARE YOU THERE?" ARGENTOBER continues as we talk about the 1980 Suspiria follow-up INFERNO! Joining us is our own favorite little witch, DAVID BLUVBAND (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, The Chris Gethard Show). Will Bluvband and the Cannon bros start a "3 Brothers Talking About the 3 Mothers" spin-off podcast?! Don't hold your breath (unless you can hold your breath as long as Rose underwater). But they do go deep on the confusing plot...and all the poor cats. And if the Billy Drago lookalike that gets murdered is even related to the three mothers...and those poor cats. And all of the fun happenstance, amazing Keith Emerson soundtrack and murder murder murder in between...but my god THOSE POOR CATS! Dario Argento really hates cats? So give it a listen and decide for yourself: Did Dario really mean for this to be a trilogy or did we get Cornetto'd. 

    [Due to audio issues, we had to use our Zoom backup for audio. Apologies audio is not up to our usual crispy clean sound!]

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    • 2 hr 1 min
    ARGENTOBER: SUSPIRIA

    ARGENTOBER: SUSPIRIA

    The Cannon Canon presents our first HARD PIVOT! For the month of October, we'll be covering the films of Dario Argento. We're calling it, ARGENTOBER! And kicking off "Argentober" is the 1977 horror classic SUSPIRIA. That's right, we are starting with the gold standard of Argento. We swear it is not a gush fest (but it's not that far off). From the mindblowing soundtrack of Goblin, to the unbelievable set design, to the trademark Argento NCS (Needlessly Complicated Shot), we go through how much we love this movie. But also talking about how the plot almost doesn't make any sense and how for a world-class ballet school they seem to not really do much dancing. 

    But seriously, watch Lords of Synth.

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    • 2 hr 9 min
    DEAD HEAT (w/ Frank and Geoff)

    DEAD HEAT (w/ Frank and Geoff)

    HEY, YOU'RE HURT! LADY I'M F-ING DEAD! Yep, you got that right. Today, The Cannon Bros (Frank and Geoff) are doing a COULD'VE Been A Cannon on the 1988 Treat Williams/Joe Piscopo horror/comedy/cop movie vehicle "DEAD HEAT" (from Cannon kissin' cousin New World Pictures). Also known as "Young Geoff's most rented movie". Find out with the Cannon Bros how this movie psychologically scarred us both as children and now. Was it from the horrific, crazier than an Italian gore film practical effects from the great Steve Johnson? Was it from the existential questions that this movie poses and does not answer? Or was it simply from the amount of Joe Piscopo being Joe Piscopo you have to deal with? No matter what, The Cannon Bros cover it all while doing piles and piles of Joe Piscopo/Frank Sinatra impressions and "Uzi Doozies". And keep your eyes peeled for what special effects were clearly leftovers from "Big Trouble In Little China". Plot be damned, you are gonna like the way you look...in Piscopo's shoulder-padded leather jacket! 

    "Whatsitgonnatake?" 

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    • 1 hr 58 min
    INVADERS FROM MARS (w/ Lucas Hazlett)

    INVADERS FROM MARS (w/ Lucas Hazlett)

    CHECK THEM NECKS AND TALK TO YOUR KRANG BRAIN! Because today we are back in Toby Territory, talking about Toby "Cream Jeans" Hooper's 1986 remake "Invaders From Mars". Joining us is special guest Lucas Hazlett (TBS' Wrecked, Lifetime's American Princess)! This movie is a cavalcade of amazing actors, amazing behind the scenes, and amazing how it just...isn't...that amazing? HEAR US OUT! We go through it all, from the alien's Pink Floyd laser light show, to the alien's terrible skills at hiding their plans, to the alien's ship designs...kind of looking like low rent "Alien". Are those tic-tacs he's pouring into that coffee? Is this an "Edge of Tomorrow" scenario? Did Karen Black accidentally say an actress' real name? Did Mrs. McKeltch own that creepy taxidermy van BEFORE the invasion?! Also, Frank completely botches his easter egg trivia and cites "Starcrash" instead of the original "Invaders From Mars" (they look like the same head!). And we try to answer the ultimate question: Does Cream Jeans just have a little brother complex with Spielberg? 

    Never forget...“Marines have no qualms about killing Martians!”

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    Twitter: @thecannoncanon

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    • 1 hr 55 min
    OVER THE TOP Commentary Episode Teaser

    OVER THE TOP Commentary Episode Teaser

    MEET US HALFWAY...and think about joining our Patreon! Yep, the Cannon Bros are on a little bit of a Cannon respite but we haven't stopped the Cannon train rolling. Today we are giving you a taste of a Patreon exclusive episode we have up now. We did commentary for all of Sylvester Stallone's "Over The Top". It's a fun one for a great movie, so take a sample of us breaking down what a bad dad Lincoln Hawk is...and what a bad Grandpa Jason Cutler is...and what a bad son Michael is. OK, so everyone but the Mom sucks. Bunch of lil s***s all arm-wrestling and driving trucks. It's a fun ride so join on in!



    Follow us on the socials:

    Twitter: @thecannoncanon

    Instagram: @thecannoncanon

    And join our new Patreon: patreon.com/thecannoncanon

    Please rate and review us!

    • 22 min

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5
34 Ratings

34 Ratings

Bozarth ,

You’ll get into it!

The Cannon Canon is like a weekly visit to the video store without the late fees. Geoff and Frank, the Cannon Bros, are perfect hosts for this deep dive into the wild world of Cannon Films and beyond.

Robin Cannon Head J. ,

My Absolute Favorite Podcast

These guys are the best! They understand Cannon through and through and have provided me with hours of laughs and entertainment. Keep up the good work!

Rob in MN ,

Love love love

So thankful I found the Cannon Bros a few months ago, their wonderful show has gotten me through some tough times during a strange point in history. Great chemistry, funny guests, amazing premise. Can’t say enough good things about Frank and Geoff. Support their Patreon.

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