The Dad Manual

Tony Cooper
  • 5.0 (5)
  • Parenting
  • Updated Weekly

The Dad Manual is a fatherhood podcast hosted by Tony Cooper, featuring honest conversations with dads about the real, unfiltered journey of parenthood. This parenting podcast for dads explores everything from the excitement of being a first time dad to navigating the teenage years. As one of the best podcasts for expecting dads and experienced fathers alike, we dive deep into what it actually means to be a modern dad—the struggles, the growth, the mistakes, and the moments that change you forever. Whether you're looking for a new dad podcast or seasoned parenting wisdom, this family podcast delivers the honest guidance you won't find in books.

  1. 5d ago

    Ep 33: The Forever Folder — Recording Voice Notes For Your Kids

    What if the best gift you gave your kids wasn't a memory, but your own voice? Blake Fly, dad to Koa and Summer (with a third on the way), joins Tony Cooper to talk about Dads Making History, the group he started where fathers record monthly audio and video messages for their kids to hear someday. Blake shares how the practice began during the pandemic, why "donut dates" became a normalizing ritual for the group, how a lost hard drive taught him about the fragility of memory, and how becoming a dad expanded his emotional range in ways he never expected. Tony and Blake dig into presence, legacy, and what it means to really show up for your kids. The "Forever Folder" is a monthly audio or video message dads record for their kids, meant to be a presencing practice for the dad as much as a gift for the child.Less is more: a good message is often just two to three minutes, a small, specific moment rather than a sweeping life lesson.Small rituals normalize across a community fast. One dad's "donut date" habit inspired another dad to start his own recurring one-on-one time with his daughter.One-on-one time with a kid (a donut date, coaching a sport, a standing weekly outing) gives a spouse real relief and builds a distinct bond.Becoming a parent can expand emotional range far beyond what a "sunshine only" upbringing prepared someone for, including grief, like a miscarriage before a first child.Presence is the real antidote to time passing unnoticed. Capturing a moment, even a mundane one like potty training, makes it retrievable later.What we intentionally leave behind (and take forward) from our own parents shapes how we father, whether that's constant positivity, a short temper, or building things with your hands.A voice message might never be listened to, and that's okay. The value is in the ritual of recording it, not guaranteed impact on the recipient. If you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper 00:00 Cold open00:29 Meet Blake Fly01:23 Blake's speaking and coaching work03:00 Becoming a dad in 202004:00 What is the Forever Folder05:00 Choosing what to record each month07:54 Dads Making History group08:05 The donut date ripple effect10:19 One-on-one time and giving mom a break12:00 Being the youngest of three14:04 Foresight that everything is temporary16:04 A voicemail from aging parents17:13 Documenting firsts, lasts, and the messy middle18:23 Counting laps, counting years21:09 Losing four years of photos and video23:11 Is this really for the kids or for you25:00 The realization that changed his approach27:14 How coaching shapes his fathering29:17 A grade 8 yearbook prediction30:52 His mom's signs and rituals34:01 What he's leaving behind from his parents37:12 Becoming a dad kicked his ass38:00 The miscarriage before Koa40:09 Expanding emotional range42:22 Preparing for baby number three44:01 Closing thoughts

    Ep 33: The Forever Folder — Recording Voice Notes For Your Kids

  2. Aug 4

    Ep 32: Why Depth Beats Width in Raising Confident Kids

    A dad of three shares the wild story of a highway birth, the exhaustion of new fatherhood, and why breaking generational patterns starts with you. Tony Cooper sits down with Lior Weinstein to talk about becoming a father at 30, supporting a wife through three very different births, and the physical toll of parenting a newborn while running a business. Lior explains why he stepped away from a fast-growing startup to be present for his second child, how he's working to end inherited family trauma before it reaches his kids, and why depth of focus beats exposure to everything. He also shares how he uses AI to write bedtime stories with his sons. Key takeaways include: the difference between reacting to a schedule and creating one, why physical exhaustion hits harder with each additional kid, how commitment to one passion builds a transferable skill, and why an abundance mindset starts with saying yes. Physical exhaustion from parenting compounds with each additional kid, even when you've "done it before."Supporting your wife through the newborn stage often matters more than mastering baby care yourself.Stepping away from work, even temporarily, can be the right call when presence matters most.Breaking generational patterns starts with noticing what was passed down to you.Building trust with your kids matters more than being their expert in every interest.Depth in one passion teaches a transferable skill: mastery, focus, and commitment.An abundance mindset starts with saying yes to your kids' curiosity, even if it doesn't stick.AI can be a tool for deeper connection, like personalized bedtime stories, not just efficiency. If you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 Being a dad is hard because you care00:29 Meet Lior and his three kids01:25 Becoming a dad at 3002:11 Matan's highway birth story06:19 Nature vs nurture with three kids09:52 Always knowing he'd be a dad11:33 Supporting his wife through labor14:02 Teaching infants from day one16:06 Becoming a different kind of husband19:18 Learning from mom's instincts21:04 Going from one kid to two23:04 Physical exhaustion hits harder26:19 Deciding to leave the startup27:15 Nine months traveling in an RV29:44 Stopping generational family trauma32:25 Building a relationship of trust33:23 The chess grandmaster book36:05 Why depth beats width39:41 Using AI for bedtime stories

    Ep 32: Why Depth Beats Width in Raising Confident Kids

  3. Jul 28

    Ep 31: Perfectionism Made Him Great. Will It Break Him As A Dad?

    A former New York City Ballet principal dancer opens up about the fear underneath the joy of expecting his first child. Chase Finlay talks with Tony Cooper about the perfectionism that carried him from a childhood ballet studio to the world's biggest stages, and why that same drive could work against him as a father. They cover the difference between performing for approval and living in alignment, why presence stops time with your kids, and how recovery and honest relationships taught him to become his own cavalry instead of waiting to be rescued. Chase also shares his intentions for his baby shower, his hopes to raise a daughter free to imagine, and the advice he's giving himself for the first months of fatherhood. Key Takeaways Perfectionism can build a career and also work against you as a father if left uncheckedThe external pursuit of validation can be fulfilling, but internal alignment creates lasting fulfillmentRecovery and a healthy relationship helped reframe self-reliance: "I'm the cavalry"Presence is the antidote to feeling like time with your kids moves too fastPlay is a child's domain, and imagination is worth protecting from screens and self-consciousnessDoing your own personal work before becoming a parent is a gift you give your childrenA baby shower can be a celebration of the work both partners did on themselves, not just the babyBeing a firm, present, aware foundation for your partner matters as much as showing up physicallyIf you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 Cold open00:29 Meet Chase Finlay01:19 30 weeks into pregnancy01:35 Abundance and joy in pregnancy02:30 Fear of not being good enough03:24 Wanting everything to be perfect04:11 The evidence he'll be a great dad05:03 Chase's ballet career begins06:41 Principal dancer by 1907:32 External pursuit vs internal journey09:07 How he discovered dance11:40 Athletic and artistic, not fitting a box13:18 Tony's son finds DJing15:23 Watching your kid arrive at themselves17:24 Being flexible, not predicting the future18:13 Perfectionism: great for dance, risky for dad19:31 Living aligned with authenticity20:29 The shift from performing to real recovery21:14 Becoming his own cavalry22:19 Substance abuse and hitting bottom23:00 His wife calling him on his bullshit24:20 Alignment resolves inner conflict26:11 Doing the work before kids arrive27:27 His vision: presence as his top value29:28 Be what you want your kid to become30:07 Presence stops time32:30 Wanting to rebuild play and imagination34:22 What joy means to him now36:16 Planning the baby shower39:11 Celebrating the work, not just the baby40:08 Advice to himself for the first months41:13 Closing thoughts

    Ep 31: Perfectionism Made Him Great. Will It Break Him As A Dad?

  4. Jul 21

    Ep 30: Michael Prince On Community, Chaos, And Raising Three Kids

    A chance seat on a flight from Denver turned into a decades-long friendship, and a crash course in fatherhood. This week I sit down with my longtime friend Michael Prince to talk about the early terror of parenting a firstborn, the night his son started choking on steak at the dinner table, and why staying calm matters more than having the right answer. We get into raising a daughter after two sons, building a family culture around community and hospitality, teaching teenagers responsibility instead of just rules, and the regrets that come with parenting on the job. Michael's honesty about what he'd do differently makes this one worth sharing with any dad figuring it out as he goes. If you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ Key Takeaways: Staying calm in a crisis matters more than having the perfect response; overreacting fuels the fire.Parenting a firstborn often means learning through trial and error with no real playbook.Building community with other parents can be one of the most valuable supports of early fatherhood.Raising a daughter after sons requires learning new sensitivity and intentional one-on-one time.Teaching kids the "why" behind a task matters as much as giving them the easy solution.Discipline works best with clear boundaries paired with real communication, not control.Parenting doesn't end when kids move out; it just changes shape.Growing up with a highly accomplished parent can create a bar that's hard to know you've cleared.Family culture, whether it's music, hospitality, or hosting, gets passed down whether you plan it or not.Every parent carries regrets; what matters is staying self-aware enough to adjust.00:00 Cold open00:42 Meet Michael Prince01:18 How Tony and Michael met02:05 The flight that changed everything03:10 Becoming each other's sanity04:13 Babymoon gone sideways04:52 The terror of a firstborn06:02 Self-conscious in public with kids07:16 Learning to stay calm08:54 Burning the first batch09:21 Kervin's strong will11:18 The steak-choking story13:06 Adrenaline and instinct14:06 Growing up with a high-bar dad16:21 Living up to his father17:02 Parenting patterns we repeat19:51 Deciding to have a third20:35 Fear of the unknown gender21:15 What changed with a daughter22:24 Raising Josie differently23:08 Daddy-daughter dates27:37 Building a community, not just friends30:07 Teenage independence and curfews32:20 Parenting never really stops33:49 Teaching kids the hard way36:41 Setting red lines, not rules37:24 Teaching responsibility with alcohol40:05 Advice for hesitant dads41:17 Finding your way without a manual43:37 Final wisdom for new dads44:53 A message to Kervin

    Ep 30: Michael Prince On Community, Chaos, And Raising Three Kids

  5. Jul 14

    Ep 29: Raising British Kids Across an Ocean, With Alton Byrd

    Alton Byrd grew up without a father, then raised two kids across an ocean while playing pro basketball in the UK. This one is about figuring it out with no manual. Alton joins Tony to talk about a fatherhood honestly. He's talks about the divorce, about the years he lived a plane ride away from his children, and about what he got wrong. What comes through is hard-won and simple: kids don't remember the stuff you buy them, they remember your time. What you'll take from this episode: Why "what they want is your time" is the lesson that took him longest to learnParenting from a distance after a divorce, and owning your part in itRaising kids who are "very different" without comparing themMoving from parent-of-children to parent-of-adults, and letting them leadThe three things he'd tell any father: listen, listen to what they aren't saying, and love them no matter whatIf you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 Cold open: what they really want00:29 Meet Alton Byrd02:00 British kids and the name Miles07:30 Did he always want to be a dad?09:30 Growing up without a father13:30 Traveling the world with a baby17:40 Why kids talk about mom22:40 Figuring out fatherhood alone26:00 The divorce and owning his part28:00 The hardest lesson: time over things33:50 When your kids become adults42:40 "You owe me nothing"43:40 Advice for dads in transition

    Ep 29: Raising British Kids Across an Ocean, With Alton Byrd

  6. Jul 7

    Ep 28: How Getting Sober Made Jay Vincent the Father He Never Had

    What does it take to become the father you never had? Jay Vincent joins me for one of the most honest conversations we've had on the show. Jay grew up idolizing a dad who slid into alcoholism and walked out when Jay was 15, and for years Jay repeated the pattern, through addiction, two DUIs, and the day he came home to an empty house after his kids' mother left. This is the story of how he climbed back. In this episode: how childhood shapes the dads we become, breaking a generational cycle of addiction, the night everything changed, getting sober and staying sober for 14 years, rebuilding trust with kids who barely knew him, parenting traumatized teenagers, and why doing the inner work is the real job of fatherhood. If you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com.  Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 A hard-won lesson: kids absorb everything00:29 Meet Jay Vincent, girl dad02:03 Becoming a girl dad05:44 Jay's childhood and his father09:33 When a hero slides into alcoholism10:53 The dad who left at 1512:01 An angry teenager finds the dark side14:00 Five miscarriages and the road to Kirsten17:58 Bringing a child into a fighting home21:03 The definition of fatherhood21:36 Coming home to an empty house24:07 Losing his kids and hitting bottom25:04 Two DUIs and the cop who kept showing up27:16 The night he cried out for help28:49 Fourteen years sober30:22 Doing it for his kids, then for himself33:33 Showing up across state lines34:00 Finding purpose in a fathers' recovery group46:26 Advice for parents in a struggling relationship49:22 Closing thoughts

    Ep 28: How Getting Sober Made Jay Vincent the Father He Never Had

  7. Jun 30

    Ep 27: Put on Your Mask First — Nick DeMarinis on Being the Dad You Want to Be

    Most dads ease into fatherhood one kid at a time. Nick DeMarinis skipped that part. He found out he was having identical twin boys while living in Hong Kong, 8,000 miles from family. In this episode, Nick shares the blueprint he built for present, intentional fatherhood: setting expectations with employers so he never misses what matters, co-parenting as a true team, and taking care of himself first so he has something real to give. From WeWork's turnaround to a PopAShot national championship, Nick proves you don't have to sacrifice the dad you want to be. Key takeaways: How Nick's parents — a bread man and a teacher from New York — gave him a clear blueprint for fatherhoodWhy moving back from Hong Kong with twin infants taught him the power of structure and disciplineHow radical transparency with employers creates space for the dad commitments that matterThe "survive and advance" mindset that got him and his wife through the first year with twinsWhy intentional one-on-one time with each twin is one of the most underrated things twin parents can doWhat his son Max's act of compassion toward a crying classmate told him about the dad he's becomingHow the PopAShot national championship became a lesson in resilience and creativity for his boysThe oxygen mask principle — why taking care of yourself first is the most selfless thing a dad can doIf you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 Nick introduces himself as Max and Luca's dad02:15 Why the podcast format resonated with Nick right away05:00 Growing up one of six kids in an Irish Italian Catholic family08:30 Mom's compassion and adventure, dad's discipline and relationships12:00 Moving to Hong Kong with LinkedIn — six years abroad14:30 Finding out they're having identical twin boys17:00 Seeing parenting in his older siblings — adoption, cerebral palsy, presence21:00 The kind of dad Nick declared he would be from the start24:30 Never missing a single pregnancy appointment27:00 Paternity leave — being there for Diana, not just the babies29:30 Moving back to the US, joining WeWork, the wild ride begins33:00 Transparency at work — "the best job I've ever had is being a dad"36:30 Creating the conditions you want instead of accepting default ones40:00 Co-parenting as a team — playing to each other's strengths44:00 The first year with twins: structure, survival, and celebrate every win49:30 Max helping a crying classmate — the proudest dad moment53:00 Luca as the voice of reason in a heated disagreement55:30 Advice for twin parents: intentional one-on-one time58:30 PopAShot: from shy crybaby to national championship competitor64:00 Two Guinness World Records — 232 consecutive shots, 103-foot shot68:00 What the boys have learned watching Nick compete, fail, and try again72:00 Final advice: put on your oxygen mask first

    Ep 27: Put on Your Mask First — Nick DeMarinis on Being the Dad You Want to Be

  8. Jun 23

    Ep 26: One Dad's Honest Take on Anger, Divorce, and Showing Up

    What happens when a dad of three daughters confronts the anger he inherited? Tony sits down with his brother Evan Cooper, father to Rachel, Pia, and Evie, for one of the most personal conversations yet. Evan opens up about the girl-dad learning curve, the moment he realized he was passing his own childhood wounds to his kids, and the practice he calls equanimity. They get real about staying married versus co-parenting, and how cooking and entrepreneurship shaped his daughters. Key takeaways: Why "three under two" reshaped everything about their parentingRecognizing and interrupting generational patterns of yellingEquanimity: staying composed instead of reacting to chaosThe honest debate over staying together for the kidsHow cooking became a way to connect with his daughtersWhy watching your child in pain is a dad's hardest momentEmotional intelligence as the real preparation for fatherhoodIf you enjoyed The Dad Manual, leave us a rating on your podcast app! If you loved it, share this episode with a Dad! Send your questions to dadmanualpodcast@gmail.com. Connect with Tony Cooper: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thetonycooper/ 00:00 If you can't hear the kids00:34 Meet my brother Evan Cooper02:00 Three daughters, three under two04:30 Liquid gold and dividing the nights06:30 Man-to-man and the power play08:00 The girl-dad learning curve11:00 Doing the research, missing the rest14:00 Generational anger and yelling17:30 Equanimity and staying composed20:30 The moment it broke my heart23:00 Staying married or co-parenting28:00 What the girls actually took from it31:30 Cooking as a way to connect34:00 Entrepreneurship and a different work life36:00 The hardest part: watching them hurt38:00 Advice for a brand-new dad

    Ep 26: One Dad's Honest Take on Anger, Divorce, and Showing Up
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About

The Dad Manual is a fatherhood podcast hosted by Tony Cooper, featuring honest conversations with dads about the real, unfiltered journey of parenthood. This parenting podcast for dads explores everything from the excitement of being a first time dad to navigating the teenage years. As one of the best podcasts for expecting dads and experienced fathers alike, we dive deep into what it actually means to be a modern dad—the struggles, the growth, the mistakes, and the moments that change you forever. Whether you're looking for a new dad podcast or seasoned parenting wisdom, this family podcast delivers the honest guidance you won't find in books.

Information

  • Creator
    Tony Cooper
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    34
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Tony Cooper