The Drunk and the Ugly is a role playing game (RPG) podcast with a focus on narrative gaming systems. These systems utilize a wide variety of rules and settings to create fantastic stories for both players and listeners. The cast relies on improvisation, weaving compelling narratives from disparate characters and viewpoints. From science fiction to fantasy, mystery to slice-of-life, the podcast covers all genres. While similar to a radio drama on the surface, the rules and randomization mechanics of the RPG systems affect the flow and decisions of the stories. There are no scripts and no filters. We invite you to join us twice weekly as we celebrate narrative, gaming, and storytelling. Also dogs.
Thought Crimes Episode 14 – Dragon Slayer
There are few who would disagree that the meaning of life is more than the collection of good experiences to a degree that they maximally outweigh bad experiences. But how MUCH more? In their centuries of debating hedonism, utilitarianism, stoicism, and a hundred other worldviews, philosophers have considered the thought experiment of shaving down one’s brain to the minimum required to maintain consciousness and experience sensation, and placing it in a jar that continuously stimulates its pleasure centers until it dies a happy death. Under philosophies that maximize pleasure, they say, doing that to someone would not only be a good thing, but it might actually be a moral obligation. If pleasure is the only measure of a life well-lived, then such an absurd, destructive setup would perfect one’s life by definition. The very idea seems ridiculous. On the other hand. Pleasure sells. After all. It’s Only Business.
Thought Crimes Episode 13 – Keep Talking
Sometimes, when you work on your own for long enough, your plans become inseparable from you, attached irreparably to the way you think. This is all well and good until the plan leaves your grasp, and others start to grapple with it, only to find that what has been created wasn’t made for them, despite that being the original point of the project. Once past the rose-colored glasses, the plan becomes riddled with failure points, uninteresting, and frustrating, not because there’s anything wrong with the perspective of the recipient, but because that perspective wasn’t fully considered. When this occurs, there’s little to do but ask your friend to cut out a LARGE amount of frustrated side talk, question your self-worth as a GM, dread the premiere of the episode, and write a pretentious introduction paragraph in the style of your other pretentious introduction paragraphs to warn the listener. After all. It’s Only GMing. My Bad. Side Chatter
Thought Crimes Episode 12 – The Dirty Job
The cogs continued to turn, squealing under the friction of the grit placed within them, but turning nonetheless. Tired, twitching fingers fretted at the keyboard, eyes bouncing between shorthand sections of past plans. The links were there, even if a good number of the boxes were marked with a small, passive aggressive “x”. At least when part of the plan failed, it didn’t require attention. It was like tossing a ball aside while juggling; the overall effect is diminished, but what remains is more reliable, more likely to work. With Project Lachesis standing at the forefront of his workflow, mental energy was always a resource to carefully ration for a rainy day. Thunder was starting to echo on the horizon, but he continued to type, to work, to plan, to scheme. After all, It’s Only Business, But maybe one day soon, that would finally change. Side Chatter
Thought Crimes Episode 11 – The Break In
Another day, another demand. The city had long since stopped paying for the upkeep of the few remaining public prisons, after years and years of shrinking budgets. Strategic privatization meant only so much of the city revenue came through the tax system, and it became politically difficult to allocate that money to the housing and well-being of people the public had been encouraged to despise. That meant that the prisons were encouraged to find “Alternate Means of Solvency”. These ranged from using modified jail cells as secure server storage, to leasing out guards as private event security, to any number of projects on which the prisoners can be put to work. As they say, “If the service you’re being offered is free, then you’re the product.” Over time, the prisons became more and more insular, with less and less oversight. Internal programs were no longer municipally investigated, as long as they brought in enough money to keep the building afloat. And it was only a matter of time before the wardens found a way to be paid under the table for NOT keeping certain cells secure. Leasable space is worth a lot in a city of millions, arguably more than the prisoners that occupy it. After all, It’s Only Business
Thought Crimes Episode 10 – Who Have You Hurt?
Monopolies are often more complicated in the modern era than the board game would have you believe. With the size and complexity of the business incorporation space, a corporation of a certain size often needs to build both horizontal and vertical integration. A certain size above -that- often needs to start spending a great deal of money in Washington to make that expansion process go smoother. However, any self-propagating organism of sufficient size begins to have sections within it that are not aligned in function, that do not operate in pursuit of the same goals. Often these difficulties become known through some minor disaster, and the company resolves them through some small amount of money, perhaps in the hundreds of thousands. However, the more underground these parts are, and the subtler each of its parts remains, the harder it is for their interactions to come to light. And the easier it is for a corporation to stab itself in the back. After all. It’s Only Business.
Thought Crimes Episode 9 – In N Out
Some days it was better than others. Today was not one of those days. Some days it was a minor annoyance at the back of his mind. Today, it felt like lightning was pouring through his nerves. Another day in the dark, fingers clutching at the remote as he scanned for something to distract him, when he knew full well that what he sought to avoid would be doing the distracting. His fingers balled into fists, even that motion betraying his frustrated gravitas by evoking a soft groan. He’d given so much of himself. He’d served his country in so many capacities, gained so many skills, saved so many lives, and ended so many more. He did things that he would never, ever confess to, even if he weren’t sworn to secrecy. And the moment those skills became obsolete, the very week that his injury removed his capacity to serve, he was discarded. Set back at home with a brief tribunal, a half-hearted salute, and a quarter of the money he needed to survive. And he was only likely to survive for so long, if nothing changed. Luckily, that’s exactly what happened. It all seemed like a blur. A man in a suit, a briefcase with a tech corporations logo on it, and promises of an experimental nervous system surgery that would make him never care about his pain again. He smiled that day. And there would never be another day that he -didn’t- face his work with a smile. Because loyalty can be a fickle thing, but sometimes, the price is high enough to earn it forever. After all. It’s Only Business.
Customer ReviewsSee All
I’m a very picky podcast listener. The average podcast in my feed stays there for like 2-3 months before I get sick of it and everyone who worked on it. So the fact that this podcast has been in my feed for a couple of years and, while I get tired of it occasionally, I still enjoy listening is the best compliment I can give this show.
Best 40k AP on the market
All Warhammer 40k fans look no further. Best one I’ve found to date.
The Hilarious and the Awesome
The Drunk and the Ugly are an actual play tabletop RPG podcast where the hosts play games over the internet with one another. These adventures are always good for thrills and laughs. Recommended starting points include their games based off of Fallout and Star Wars. Worth a listen!