The Happya Life with Clare Deacon

Clare Deacon | Trauma-Informed Therapist, Positive Psychology Coach & Author of Blooming Happya

What if thriving isn’t about having it all together but finally feeling at home in your own skin? Welcome to The Happya Life with Clare Deacon, the podcast for women ready to move from survival mode to self-worth, nervous system healing, and emotional freedom. If you feel stuck in people-pleasing, overwhelmed by self-doubt, or burned out from always doing more, you’re not alone. And you’re in the right place. 💬 We talk boundaries, burnout, emotional regulation, trauma recovery, nervous system work, and creating a life that actually feels good (not just looks good). I’m Clare Deacon, trauma-informed therapist, positive psychology coach, and Amazon #1 bestselling author of Blooming Happya. I combine science, soul, and strategy to help women stop performing and start becoming. In each episode, you’ll get: Practical tools and nervous system insightsReal talk on trauma, boundaries, and rebuilding your self-worthCoaching grounded in neuroscience, embodiment, and positive psychology This is where self-help meets self-connection. 🎧 Ready to heal the patterns holding you back and start living from your truth? Press play. This is where your transformation begins.

  1. Series Special Happya Ever After: Guilt After Loss: Wanting More From Life

    3D AGO

    Series Special Happya Ever After: Guilt After Loss: Wanting More From Life

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. Guilt after loss can be confusing especially when it appears just as life begins to feel slightly lighter. In this episode of Happya Ever After, Clare Deacon explores the often-unspoken guilt that arises after the death of a partner, particularly when moments of relief, joy, or hope begin to return. This is the guilt that shows up when you laugh and then feel a pang.  When you enjoy something and immediately question yourself.  When wanting more from life feels like a betrayal of the person you lost. If you’ve ever wondered whether feeling okay means you’re forgetting, moving on too quickly, or loving them less, this episode is for you. Clare gently unpacks: Why guilt after bereavement is so commonHow guilt can be linked to love, loyalty, and attachmentWhy wanting more from life does not mean leaving your loved one behindHow guilt can become a nervous system response rather than a moral truthThis episode isn’t about forcing positivity or rushing grief.  It’s about understanding guilt with compassion, reducing self-judgement, and allowing grief and growth to coexist. There is no right or wrong way to experience guilt after loss.  And you are not doing grief wrong. 🔗 Explore all Happya Ever After resources: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after 📘 Free guide – Life After Loss: Finding a Way Forward: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after/life-after-loss 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    13 min
  2. When the Old Version of You Doesn’t Fit: Outgrowing Who the World Expects You to Be

    5D AGO

    When the Old Version of You Doesn’t Fit: Outgrowing Who the World Expects You to Be

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. What happens when you’ve changed internally… but the world still expects the old version of you? In this episode of The Happya Life Podcast, Clare Deacon explores the emotional and psychological tension that arises when you begin to outgrow an identity that once kept you safe, successful, and accepted. This is the stage of growth that many people don’t anticipate. You’ve done the internal work. You’ve rebuilt self-trust. You no longer want to over-function, over-explain, or shrink yourself to keep the peace. But relationships, workplaces, and family systems may still relate to you as who you used to be. And that creates friction. In this episode, Clare explores: Why outgrowing an identity can feel lonely rather than empoweringThe nervous system response to changing relational dynamicsThe tension between authenticity and belongingWhy guilt often appears when you stop being the “reliable” or “strong” oneHow identity shifts create social consequencesThe difference between outgrowing people and outgrowing patternsWhy discomfort doesn’t mean you’ve made a mistakeGrounded in positive psychology and nervous system science, this conversation helps you understand why this stage of growth feels so destabilising and why it’s often a sign of integration rather than regression. If you feel like you no longer fit the version of yourself the world is comfortable with, this episode will help you make sense of what’s happening. Explore identity and self-trust resources here:  👉 https://happyacoach.com/explore/self 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    13 min
  3. Series Special Happya Ever After: Loneliness After the Death of a Partner

    FEB 13

    Series Special Happya Ever After: Loneliness After the Death of a Partner

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. Loneliness after losing a partner is not always about being alone. In this episode of Happya Ever After, Clare Deacon explores the specific and often misunderstood loneliness that follows the death of a partner the kind that can exist even when you’re surrounded by people, support, and conversation. This is the loneliness of missing shared life.  Of losing the person who witnessed your everyday moments.  Of no longer being deeply known in the same way. If you’ve found yourself feeling isolated despite not being physically alone, or confused by why social connection doesn’t ease the ache, this episode is for you. Clare gently unpacks why loneliness after the death of a partner feels so different from other forms of loneliness, how attachment and the nervous system respond to bereavement, and why this experience is not something to fix or rush. This episode is not about replacing your partner, filling the gap, or forcing connection.  It’s about naming what’s real, reducing self-judgement, and allowing yourself to grieve a bond that mattered deeply. There is no right or wrong way to experience loneliness after loss.  Your response makes sense. Explore the Happya Ever After hub:  https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after Free guide – Life After Loss: Finding a Way Forward:  https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after/life-after-loss 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    13 min
  4. Series Special Happya Ever After: Life After Loss: When the World Moves On

    FEB 6

    Series Special Happya Ever After: Life After Loss: When the World Moves On

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. After the initial shock of grief fades, something else often begins. The world carries on.  Support quietens.  And you’re left standing in the aftermath surviving, functioning, but feeling unseen, forgotten, or unsure why it still feels so hard. In this episode of Happya Ever After, Clare Deacon explores the often-unspoken phase of grief that comes after the crisis. The stage where life after loss begins, not with clarity or hope, but with confusion, loneliness, and a deep sense of disconnection as the world moves on. This episode is for you if: You’ve lost a partner and feel abandoned now the practical support has fadedYou’re coping on the outside but struggling internallyYou feel pressure to “be okay” when you’re anything butYou’re wondering if this numb, unsettled phase is normalClare gently explains why this stage of grief can feel so destabilising, what’s happening in your nervous system, and why struggling here does not mean you’re failing or doing grief wrong. This is not an episode about moving on, fixing grief, or forcing positivity.  It’s about being heard, normalising your experience, and meeting yourself with compassion as you begin to navigate life after loss. You don’t need answers.  You don’t need a plan.  You’re not behind. 🔗 Explore all Happya Ever After resources: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after 📘 Download the free guide: Life After Loss – Finding a Way Forward: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after/life-after-loss 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    13 min
  5. Rebuilding a Sense of Self: When You Don’t Know Where to Start

    FEB 4

    Rebuilding a Sense of Self: When You Don’t Know Where to Start

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. What happens after the roles loosen, the old ways of coping fall away, and you realise you can’t go back but you also don’t know what comes next? In this episode of The Happya Life Podcast, Clare Deacon explores what it really means to rebuild a sense of self when you feel unanchored, unsure, or disconnected from who you are without turning it into another project to fix or optimise. This is a grounded, psychologically informed conversation for intelligent, capable people who are used to coping, performing, and holding things together and who now find themselves in an unfamiliar in-between space. In this episode, Clare explores: Why rebuilding yourself doesn’t start with clarity or answersWhat it means to feel “lost” after long periods of responsibility or survivalHow the nervous system responds when old roles fall awayWhy uncertainty is part of identity reorganisation, not a sign of failureThe difference between rebuilding, reinvention, and self-improvementHow positive psychology understands self-trust, autonomy, and psychological flexibilityThis episode is not about finding a new identity or deciding who to be next. It’s about learning how to listen to yourself again gently, honestly, and without pressure. If you’re in a place where you know something needs to change but don’t know where to start, this conversation will help you understand why that makes sense and why you’re not behind. Explore related resources around identity, self-worth, and rebuilding from the inside out here: 👉 https://happyacoach.com/explore/self  🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    14 min
  6. Series Special Happya Ever After: My Story: From Survival to Happya Finding a Way Forward After Losing My Husband

    JAN 30

    Series Special Happya Ever After: My Story: From Survival to Happya Finding a Way Forward After Losing My Husband

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. In this opening episode of Happya Ever After, Clare Deacon shares her personal story of life after the sudden death of her husband not by retelling the traumatic event, but by speaking honestly about what came after. This episode is about the early shock, the long middle where survival stopped working, and the quiet, difficult process of finding a way forward when the future you planned no longer exists. Clare speaks openly about: The numbness and disorientation of early griefFunctioning on the outside while falling apart insideThe pressure to “perform” grief for othersThe moment survival stopped being enoughWhy this experience led to the creation of Happya Ever AfterThis is not a story of fixing grief or moving on. It’s a story of living through loss, finding agency again, and choosing a different narrative one that allows grief and hope to exist side by side. This episode anchors the heart of the series and explains who Happya Ever After is for: those who have survived loss and are quietly wondering if there is another way to live. Explore the Happya Ever After hub: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after Free guide – Life After Loss: Finding a Way Forward: https://happyacoach.com/happya-ever-after/life-after-loss 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    14 min
  7. Wellbeing Without the Wellness Industry

    JAN 28

    Wellbeing Without the Wellness Industry

    🪷If something in this spoke to you, I’d love to hear, message me. If you’ve ever felt disconnected, irritated, or quietly resistant to mainstream wellness culture, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Happya Life Podcast, Clare Deacon explores what wellbeing really means once you strip away the noise, pressure, and performance of the wellness industry. This is a grounded, psychologically informed conversation about why so many intelligent, capable women feel alienated by wellness trends and why that reaction makes sense. Clare unpacks: Why the wellness industry often increases pressure rather than reducing itHow wellbeing has been turned into another form of self-optimisationThe difference between wellbeing, performance, and copingWhy “doing more” isn’t the answer for a tired nervous systemHow positive psychology and nervous system science define wellbeing differentlyWhat wellbeing looks like after long periods of survival and responsibilityThis episode is not about rejecting wellbeing it’s about reclaiming it. If you’ve tried the routines, read the books, and still feel like something doesn’t fit, you’re not failing. You’re likely ready for a more honest, sustainable conversation about wellbeing that respects your life, your nervous system, and your intelligence. For further resources around identity, self-worth, and wellbeing beyond survival, visit:  👉 https://happyacoach.com/explore/self 🌸 Let’s Stay Connected: Your Healing Journey Deserves Support ➤ 🎙️ Book a Free Clarity Call: Need guidance, grounding, or space to speak? Let's talk. 👉 happyacoach.com/chat ➤ 🌐 Explore More at: happyacoach.com 💌 Email Clare Directly: clare@happyacoach.com 🎵 Music by LemonMusicStudio

    13 min

Ratings & Reviews

About

What if thriving isn’t about having it all together but finally feeling at home in your own skin? Welcome to The Happya Life with Clare Deacon, the podcast for women ready to move from survival mode to self-worth, nervous system healing, and emotional freedom. If you feel stuck in people-pleasing, overwhelmed by self-doubt, or burned out from always doing more, you’re not alone. And you’re in the right place. 💬 We talk boundaries, burnout, emotional regulation, trauma recovery, nervous system work, and creating a life that actually feels good (not just looks good). I’m Clare Deacon, trauma-informed therapist, positive psychology coach, and Amazon #1 bestselling author of Blooming Happya. I combine science, soul, and strategy to help women stop performing and start becoming. In each episode, you’ll get: Practical tools and nervous system insightsReal talk on trauma, boundaries, and rebuilding your self-worthCoaching grounded in neuroscience, embodiment, and positive psychology This is where self-help meets self-connection. 🎧 Ready to heal the patterns holding you back and start living from your truth? Press play. This is where your transformation begins.