The Normal Mess

Ashley and Cayce

We're Ashley Fetyko & Cayce Lynch. We're Millennials, we're lawyers, we're moms, we’re Swifties, and we're best friends! We're deep in the thick of paid working motherhood. It's real, and it's funny, and sometimes, it's real funny. But also? It's no joke! It's... The Normal Mess! New video episodes every Thursday. thenormalmess@gmail.com Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess

  1. 6d ago

    The Parenting Trap Nobody Warned Us About

    Cayce has a debut, and it has to do with dinner plates. Then, let's talk about hair! Teddy Bear Brond is a thing, people; just ask Ashley's other long-term relationship (her hair stylist, Natalie). In celebration of all the little girls who were told they were "dishwater blond," we present: the hair color rebrand. Same quasi-blond color, new name! Then, our tofu (thanks for the vegetarian inclusivity, Cayce) of the episode: the bars we set (accidentally or intentionally) in motherhood and beyond. To quote Admiral Ackbar of Star Wars fame: IT'S A TRAP! And by "it," we mean, bedtime, summertime, holidays, birthdays, photo books... Where is the line?! We talk all things bars (not the alcohol, bar exam, or prison kind) across motherhood, friendship, career, and more: where do our bars come from, and which ones do we solemnly swear we will never set? (Hint: Cayce is NOT an Elf-on-the-Shelf-Mom!) Then, it's time for a classic (and sometimes gross) game of "Would You Rather?". Ashley's number one (only?) question: Can I fly?! It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow along as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    56 min

  2. Jun 18

    Let's Hear It for the Dads!

    Somewhat in honor of Father's Day, and somewhat because the Wall Street Journal published yet another article we can't help ourselves but to comment on, we're talking about DADS. But first... let's discuss eyelid real estate. And, applications are officially open to join the Messy Bestie club. We accept them on a rolling basis at thenormalmess@gmail.com, and we'll be your safety school. Do you know what an orphaned negative is? Let's just say this: our wish for you is that you embrace your full chalance, you look gusting, you know you can be cognito if you want to be, you are fully bobulated, and your day is mellow enough that you can just plode. English is weird, guys. It just is. Then, we're digging into what it actually means to be a good dad (cue the super catchy song by Farideh - go follow her @ilovefarideh in all the places, Messy Besties!), how fatherhood is changing, and the surprising benefits a good dad can bestow. What do dads think it means to "have it all" and how can we better equalize the 15+ hours per week most moms spend on household related tasks? Ashley's husband hopefully knew what he was signing up for, and Cayce's husband might just regret which seat is his at the dinner table. Then, for our 5 male listeners: we love your blouse! J/k. We don't want to ragebait you. We love you! But... we (and everyone else who listens) will be well-equipped to ragebait a dude if the mood so strikes, after listening to our final segment. Hint: Taylor totally put Travis on the map! It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow along as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    54 min

  3. Jun 11

    The Good Ole Days Are Now

    It's Thursday, and Ashley wants to know whatever happened to pants (pants). That was a Chicago (the musical) reference, people. But seriously: why are pants such strange shapes and lengths these days?! Fear not! Cayce has the pep talk we all need: even National Parks get 1-star reviews. And, who knew "birds" was a humor category we needed? Memes are for the birds, friends, and we mean that with all the love and respect of future birdwatchers. Then, we're talking nostalgia. More specifically, we're talking about why some brains (ahem, ours) are more wired for it, how it shows up in motherhood, and how we can see the moments we're in more clearly when we're in them. What are our earliest memories, and what are we nostalgic for (other than jeans that made sense)? There are some lessons we can take from The Office, and Ashley cries. Good news/bad news here, Messy Besties: nothing lasts forever. Finally, in a nod to the nostalgia some people (ahem, not us) feel for high school, we're sharing what our superlatives would be today! It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow along as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    59 min

  4. Jun 4

    Is "Corporate America Crushing Senior-Level Mothers"? Or Did We Girl Boss Too Close to the Sun?!

    Cayce is leveling up in motherhood, Ashley has a breakup announcement, and we are FEISTY today! You can be very certain that AI was not used in the creation of this episode or any other, but: what is the multiple of "platypus"? We promise this is not turning into an article-reaction podcast, but we have another article this week, and please buckle up. We're responding to the viral Fast Company article, "Corporate America is Crushing Senior-Level Mothers," which is pretty much a direct slap in the face to last week's hopeful Wall Street Journal piece. Is the solution truly to burn it all down, or did we just girl boss too close to the sun? Cayce has a PSA regarding meal prepping, Ashley is back to being sweary, and spoiler alert: we do say the word "nipple" in this episode. You've been warned! But, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and we have a new shero: Shamim Noorani Gillani, SVP of growth and client success at Carrum Health. Shamim, we don't know you, but we are claiming you as a Messy Bestie. Then, we play a little game of "this or that," and can we all collectively agree that toilet paper goes over, not under?! (That one is for you, Ashley's mom. You are so perfect in so many ways, but you seriously need to get your toilet paper in order.) It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow along as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    1h 3m

  5. May 28

    Wall Street Journal Blind React!

    Cayce has a PSA to whomever is putting dance moms through the ringer: IT'S HARD ENOUGH OUT HERE. WHY ARE WE PUTTING MASCARA ON THREE-YEAR-OLDS?! Then: who would play Ashley and Cayce in a movie, and can we discuss how celebrity faces are basically model homes these days? Hold onto your hats, Messy Besties: for the first time in TNM history, Ashley is completely and utterly unprepared for this episode! And, weirdly, we planned it that way? Cayce is taking us all on a guided tour through the viral Wall Street Journal article, "Surprising Lessons from Talking with America's Highest- Earning Women," and we have THOUGHTS. Ashley gets the chills, this article is validating, and why can't we all just get along (with our impostor syndrome)?! Finally, we have new Zero Friends. And, unsurprisingly, these Zero Friends all have to do with travel. Poll question: are hotel rooms close to the elevator bank more dangerous, or are they actually safer because criminals don't like witnesses?! Also, shoutout to the Starbucks at Gate B32: you're the real MVP. It's real, and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's real funny! Rate, review, comment, and follow along as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    51 min

  6. May 21

    Come As You (Mostly) Are

    **Warning: This episode contains brief references to intimate partner emotional violence. Those references are toward the end of the episode. If you or someone you love is experiencing intimate partner violence (emotional, physical, or both), there are resources available to help. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at: 1.800.799.SAFE (7233), or can be reached by texting “START” to 88788.**   Ashley and Cayce are both notoriously slow to a trend, except for Ashley when it comes to music, who wants the record to permanently reflect that Spotify told her last year her listening age is 21. We love Ted Lasso (though it is Cayce’s fault it took Ashley this long to get on board), Jane Austen is forever in style, and where do you stand on the orange juice to champagne ratio in a mimosa?! Hint: soccer is to orange as lovable characters is to champagne.   Then, we get spicy about a topic that is, as we have learned, controversial: we think you should bring the whole of who you are to work (within reason, and with clothes on, please). There, we said it! Don’t “at” us, journalists who keep insisting we are wrong. Nothing ever changes if nothing ever changes, and we think your whole self deserves a seat at the table. Ashley rants about “executive presence,” Cayce delivers actionable tips, and we talk about paper dolls.   We end with The Normal Mess IRL, plus a glimmer. Ashley is annoyed by the humans whose first day of earth alwaysseems to happen in airports, and Cayce’s dog needs to cool it on the fertilizer. But: God bless girlfriends and flowers, amiright?!   It’s real and it’s funny, and sometimes it’s real funny. But also, it’s no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow us as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We’d love to hear from you:   Instagram & TikTok:@thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    1h 7m

  7. May 14

    PLAY.

    Cayce has a revelation about her many beverages, and we formally petition to bring back the single-girl-20s multi-hour brunch! Then, Ashley has to talk about her dreams. Why are there so many animals, what does it mean to dream about monkeys, and why is she slapping her husband in the face at 3 am? The monkey dreams were an easter egg, apparently, because this episode is all about... PLAY. We talk about it endlessly for our kids, but not for ourselves. And we think that is a mistake. How do adults play, and why is it so important that we do? Ashley has research and a funtivity (MAJOR shoutout to the National Institute for Play on this one), Cayce shares brilliant insight from the always-incredible Brené Brown, and you are welcome for the free tour inside an ADHD brain. We close it out with a round of Flamingo Cards, and let's just say this: Cayce's candle smells MUCH better than Ashley's. It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow us as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    57 min

  8. May 7

    Tall Poppies & Hypewomen

    The Normal Mess is back for Season Two, and we have THOUGHTS. Specifically, we have thoughts about the ridiculous number of places we have both been since we were last on a mic together. We also have cute mugs, new hobbies, and podcast-changing announcements. Spoiler alert: The Normal Mess is now a WEEKLY PODCAST. Are we podcasting every week until we die? Only time will tell, Messy Besties. Only time will tell. This week, we are tackling a topic we circled in Season One but have not addressed head on until now: Tall Poppy Syndrome. Who is King Tarquin the Proud, and why are we still chopping down the tallest poppies in the field, centuries later? Girl on girl crime is still rampant, but we think (in a completely unbiased way, obviously) Millennials might just be the ones to save the world. Tarquin and mean girls be damned, we prefer a garden with a slew of Tall Poppies, and we have the solution: HYPEWOMEN. Cayce blesses us with Buddhist wisdom, Ashley gets feisty about body image, and our kids provide an occasional soundtrack to remind listeners that this is, in fact, still The Normal Mess. We conclude with a new game we invented: Who is your inner celebrity weirdo? Cayce has a freak flag, and Ashley needs to remain clothed while playing bongos. It's real and it's funny, and sometimes it's real funny. But also, it's no joke! Rate, review, comment, and follow us as we bring The Normal Mess to the masses! We'd love to hear from you: Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess Email: thenormalmess@gmail.com

    1h 11m
See All (19)

5
out of 5
18 Ratings

About

We're Ashley Fetyko & Cayce Lynch. We're Millennials, we're lawyers, we're moms, we’re Swifties, and we're best friends! We're deep in the thick of paid working motherhood. It's real, and it's funny, and sometimes, it's real funny. But also? It's no joke! It's... The Normal Mess! New video episodes every Thursday. thenormalmess@gmail.com Instagram & TikTok: @thenormalmess

Information

  • Creator
    Ashley and Cayce
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    19
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Ashley and Cayce
  • Show Website
    The Normal Mess

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