The REALationship Method

Chris Lomboy

The REALationship Method is a comedic podcast about dating, relationships, and advice, blending tips with plenty of tangents. With stories and experiences shared by the cast and guests, it offers cautionary tales to help you avoid making the same mistakes. So sit back, relax, and maybe learn a thing or ten!

  1. 4D AGO

    Finding Home Far From Home, Portland Protests, and Dating by Faith with Benny

    Send us a text A rainy city can make you feel alone even when you know everyone. That’s where Benny found himself in Portland—craving real community, steady sunshine, and a way to put faith into practice. One week in Hawaii flipped the script: pounding poi, working in the lo‘i, worship threaded with culture, and mentors who measured belief by service. School opened the door, but the heart of the move was purpose—helping kids with incarcerated parents and choosing a place where ohana isn’t a cliché, it’s daily life. We dig into the tradeoffs that come with paradise. The cost of living is brutal, the grind is real, and deciding whether to stay after graduation means doing the math as much as following your heart. Benny opens up about juggling biblical studies with a State Farm gig, the ache of missing Black community, and the blessing of friends who make island life feel like home. He gets candid about dating: it’s not hard to meet people in Hawaii, it’s hard to find alignment. Faith lived out, real conversation, and a growth mindset top his list, and he explains how cultural respect matters more than smooth talk. The conversation turns sharp and honest when we compare Portland’s protest years to Hawaii’s calmer streets, and when we talk about non-locals moving to the islands. Benny shares how online backlash taught him to listen first, honor the monarchy’s legacy, and stop treating Hawaii like content. From not touching turtles to learning why displacement cuts deep, he’s focused on humility, service, and showing up where it counts. Along the way, we hit food favorites, Waikiki’s Vegas energy, and why Hawaiian history should be common knowledge, not a footnote. If you’re weighing a leap for peace, purpose, or belonging, this story offers a grounded map: follow the open doors, learn the land, serve the people, and let values lead. If it resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who needs courage to move, and leave a review with your definition of “home.” • moving from Portland to Hawaii for peace and purpose • school as the vehicle, community as the destination • cost of living pressures and staying long term • dating with faith, conversation, and growth in mind • Portland protests versus Hawaii policing • respecting local culture, land, and history • learning Hawaiian history and unlearning mainland gaps • food, friends, and finding ohana through service

    55 min
  2. JAN 27

    Hurricane SLAP Shot, No Dating Customer Rule, and Handling BO with Hurricane Tee

    Send us a text What happens when a bartender at a military-heavy honky-tonk goes viral for a slap and turns it into a professional path? We sit down with Hurricane Tee to unpack the craft behind the chaos—how a novelty “Hurricane Shot” (waiver, your choice of liquor, splash of water) became a crowd favorite, and how consent, clear communication, and safety protocols keep the fun from tipping into danger. Tee shares the real bar operations most people never see: when to cut someone off, why keys get held until morning, how over-serving can put you in court, and what great bouncers do in the first 30 seconds of a bad vibe. We also get into the human side of nightlife. Tee talks about boundaries—why she never dates customers, how to decline a date without drama, and why people-pleasing is a red flag that erodes self-respect. The conversation stretches into tricky relationship territory, including what to do if a partner’s porn history shocks you, how to approach curiosity without shame, and why assumptions break trust faster than blunt honesty. Along the way, we laugh through the sensory truths of bar work, from BO and stale breath to the kindness of handing someone a napkin and a mint when words won’t land. Rooted in Hawai‘i, the episode brings island life into focus—Kailua roots, Big Island night markets, favorites like squid luau and kahlua pig with poi, and a straight talk on cost of living, military culture, and mutual respect. Tee’s five-year vision is sharp: open her own bar, plant deeper roots, collect passport stamps, and build a life that’s both grounded and free. Between slap mechanics, line-dancing regulars, and the small rituals that keep a community safe, this is a fast-moving, funny, and thoughtful ride through modern bar culture and the relationships it holds. If you enjoyed this conversation, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review—your support helps more curious listeners find us. • how a viral slap led to a pro contract • what bar safety looks like when it works • over serving liability and taking keys • tipping and tabs that don’t get paid • clean boundaries like not dating customers • canceling dates with honesty and respect • people pleasing as a red flag • first impressions, hygiene, and bar etiquette • local food favorites and Big Island markets • cost of living, military presence, and respect • five-year goals to own a bar and travel

    1h 5m
  3. JAN 20

    Dirty Shoes, Fupa Jeans, And Why Your Do-Rag Isn’t A Crime with Rita

    Send us a text What happens when sharp style meets sharper self-awareness? We sit down with Rita—EMT by training, quality officer in detox care, and a fearless fashion mind—to explore how identity, community, and emotional intelligence reshape the way we love. Her story cuts through the noise: surviving a back injury, pivoting to teach EMS, leading with compassion in inpatient detox, and stepping into a new era of personal style after major weight loss. The throughline is agency—owning what you wear, how you speak, and who you keep close. We start with the fun stuff: fashion that respects the body you have, why clean shoes matter more than brand, and how the Chicana aesthetic traveled from East LA through the West Coast into mainstream culture. Rita connects the dots on dark lip liner, representation gaps in beauty, and why crediting the origin isn’t gatekeeping—it’s integrity. She’s building community the old-school way: free styling for friends, boosting small brands, and saying no to clout-chasing because relationships outlast trends. Then we get real about relationships. Keeping score with dinners and chores often masks something deeper: the ache to feel seen, heard, and valued. Rita lays out a practical playbook—use I statements, choose partners who can tolerate hard truths, and decide together how you’ll handle conflict before it blows up. We talk grace for “human days,” the cost of being the fix-it friend, and the power of boundaries when people are committed to misunderstanding you. Age gaps don’t have to be barriers if you translate each other’s language with patience. And when love can’t be shared up close, caring from a distance can still be honest and whole—proof that soulmates can show up across friends, partners, and community. Come for the style, stay for the skills: emotional intelligence, conflict resolution, cultural respect, and the courage to choose yourself without losing your capacity to love. If this conversation moved you, follow, share, and leave a review so more listeners can find the tools and stories they need. • balancing EMT roots with quality leadership in detox care • fashion as access after weight loss and why fit matters • supporting small brands and offering free styling • cultural origins of Chicana aesthetics and giving credit • fashion icks for men and women with simple fixes • keeping score reframed as not feeling valued • using I statements to reduce defensiveness • planning conflict resolution styles together • boundaries with fix-it roles and ending one-sided ties • bridging age gaps with clarity and patience • loving from afar and accepting multiple soulmates Find me on IG/TikTok: Rita_CCE or Rude Girl Dino Justice for Goose: search hashtag JusticeForGoose “KO Studios, thank you for the lovely home. Rappy Bae, thank you for the lovely beats, man.”

    56 min
  4. JAN 6

    Six-month Dating Rule and Which Phase is Better - Single, Talking, or Together?, with Aulani

    Send us a text Fireworks lit the sky, but what really sparked was a candid look at how culture, money, and boundaries shape love. We sit down with Aulani—a behavior-focused counselor and hula performer—to unpack the signals we miss and the standards that save us. From Hawaii’s New Year traditions to why the street is spotless on January 2, we trace how community norms carry into parenting, dating, and the choices we make when no one’s watching. We get specific. Paper plates versus real dishes. Sneaker walls versus balanced budgets. A custom Hawaiian bracelet that doubles as a proposal and a life story etched in gold. These aren’t props; they’re patterns. They reveal whether someone invests in people or flexes for validation, whether spending is strategy or impulse. Aulani shares her six-month rule, why limited access to her space protects her peace, and how to read a home like a map of habits. Chris adds the parent’s view—passing down heirloom sneakers, setting rent for an at-home 19-year-old, and choosing tough love over comfort so independence can grow. We also explore the emotional backbone of real partnership. Burnout happens. Crying can be a clean reset. Acceptance and commitment tools help you step back from spirals. The bigger challenge is communication: some of us want space to think, others want words to feel seen. When you know each other’s process, you stop rewarding bad patterns and start building trust. That shows up in dating, too. DMs and W Y D texts are easy. Sitting across from someone, listening, and noticing the mismatch between their confidence online and their presence in person—that’s where clarity lives. If you’ve wondered whether it’s too late to change careers, we’ve got you. Your mid-30s can be a launchpad, not a deadline. Skills stack. Mentors matter. Multiple income streams keep your life resilient in a high-cost world. And boundaries? A text breakup won’t cut it. Respect does. Hit play for a warm, unfiltered journey through Hawaii’s culture, modern dating cues, practical money wisdom, and the kind of accountability that makes relationships—and people—stronger. If this resonated, follow the show, share with a friend who needs new-year clarity, and leave a quick review to help others find us. What boundary are you protecting this year? • reading Hawaii’s New Year culture and community cleanup • how environment and media shape kids’ behavior and language • six-month rule, access to space, and home-as-dating-red-flag • paper plates vs plates for guests as signals of effort • sneaker walls, image, resale, and spending priorities • meaning of gold chains and custom Hawaiian bracelets • career pivots in your 30s and building multiple incomes • burnout cycles, crying as release, and ACT tools • compatibility in communication and avoiding reactivity loops • texting etiquette, social media dating, and showing up in person • charging adult kids rent, chores, and financial discipline • overprotection, rebellion, and honest talks with teens • non-negotiables: no text breakups, trust and boundaries

    1h 13m
  5. 12/17/2025

    How Therapy, Family, And Hip-Hop Helped Me Rebuild After Losing My Wife with Christian

    Send us a text First and foremost, excuse the poor sound quality of this episode. My mic malfunctioned and I had to resort to my trusty airpods. Enjoy this special episode with my cousin, Christian! Grief doesn’t end, it reshapes you—and that’s where our conversation begins. We sit down with my cousin Christian to trace a life that spans Seaside party pads, frozen Minnesota mornings, and a late-blooming career in cybersecurity, all while carrying the love and loss of his wife. The story is raw and practical: how a recession closed one door, curiosity opened another, and therapy helped turn pain into movement instead of silence. We go deep on what it takes to rebuild. Christian shares the jump from PC repair to Linux and networking, the breakthrough that came with mentors and certifications, and why imposter syndrome is a signal to ask better questions, not to shrink. We unpack the culture shock of the Midwest, the power of simple family check-ins, and the hard truth that support systems don’t magically appear—you either cultivate them or change your zip code. And we talk about mental health the way it should be talked about: cost, access, and the real payoff of unlearning “suck it up” in favor of steady, honest conversations. Then we push into the fire of modern dating after loss. Expectations are sharp, forgiveness is scarce, and apps turn judgment into a reflex. Christian offers grounded advice: slow down, meet through shared activities, and let context build before chemistry gets tested. Hip-hop threads it all together as discipline, not nostalgia—b-boying as a practice that keeps the body honest and the ego humble, even as injuries linger longer and the next generation flies higher. If you’ve ever started over—after grief, divorce, or a career dead end—this episode gives you language, tools, and proof that momentum can return. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and drop a review with your best start-over rule. Your story might be the lifeline someone’s waiting for. • moving from California grit to Minnesota quiet • learning to live after losing a spouse • late shift into cybersecurity and certifications • mentorship, imposter syndrome and career momentum • therapy costs, access and the payoff of speaking up • generational norms versus modern mental health • dating after loss, boundaries and app burnout • b-boy longevity, injury management and evolving style • family as support system and the pull of relocation

    54 min
  6. 12/09/2025

    Anu Finds Love, Liking 'Noods", and What NOT to Say to a Baby with Sydni

    Send us a text Ever tried to love well while your brain is sprinting and your calendar won’t quit? We dive straight into the messy space where mental health meets relationships—how therapy, self‑awareness, and clean communication can turn chaos into something you can actually build on. With Anu co‑hosting and Sydni from 444 Hawaii in the studio, we get real about hustle culture, single parenting, and what it takes to protect your peace without ghosting the people you love. We unpack the early warning signs that your mind needs care—panic spikes, irritability, and that numb drift that turns small disagreements into big blowups. Sydni shares why she chose to normalize therapy and medication, how angel numbers and legacy shaped her brand’s mission, and the daily habits that keep her grounded. We challenge the idea that partners should be each other’s therapists and offer a simple loop to repair after conflict: name the feeling, name the need, make one clear request, and revisit together. Short, human, repeatable. Respect and transparency become the backbone of everything: letting your person know when plans change, acknowledging island dynamics where everyone knows everyone, and not leaving out the “small” details that later feel like betrayal. We also tackle the thorny stuff—work‑trip crushes without physical contact, whether preventive couples therapy is smart or overkill, and how to tell the difference between boys who play games and men who commit. Finally, we talk identity and attraction with compassion: labels can guide, but character and safety carry relationships across lines. If this conversation hits home, tap follow, share with a friend who needs a calm, honest take on love and mental health, and leave a quick review so more listeners can find us. Your support keeps these real talks going. mental health signals and coping in relationships • hustle culture stress, single parenting and side gigs • therapy, medication and removing stigma • transparency, respect and preventing jealousy • not therapising your partner and setting limits • work‑trip crushes, monogamy and repair at home • roasting with boundaries and trigger words • identity, preference and raising inclusive kids • breaking generational patterns with vulnerability

    1h 1m
  7. 12/02/2025

    He Hit 485 Deadlift And Still Can’t Read Flirting, Send Help with Sage

    Send us a text A first mic, a sandy shoreline, and a set of hard-won lessons about love and timing—Sage brings a full-life story that hits both the studio and the heart. We dig into how he broke into radio through production, why tedious edits matter more than hot takes, and what it really takes to balance a day job, gym sessions, content, and weekend shifts on Island 98.5. His path is equal parts grind and guidance, with a nod to mentors who opened the door and a work ethic that kept it open. We move from the board to the beach as Sage breaks down body surfing culture: competition stops, judging flow and form, and finding your crew. In the gym, he’s lived both sides—chasing heavy numbers as a teen and now prioritizing high-rep strength, mobility, and a kitchen-first approach to change. We talk fasting, hydration, and why the quiet choices between sets and meals outlast the loud ones. There’s a candid look at gym culture too, from tripods to pump covers to the awkward reality of accidental eye contact and what respect looks like in shared spaces. Then we get personal. Missed flirting signals, when to ask “Do you want me to listen or fix?”, and the grown-up way to end a relationship when nobody is the villain. We walk through boundaries with exes, the art of transparency that prevents jealous spirals, and how to build a home where kids can speak without fear. It’s honest, sometimes messy, and ultimately hopeful: style is personal, trust is built, and clarity saves time, tenderness, and pride. If you enjoy real talk that blends radio grind, ocean breaks, and relationship wisdom you can use today, hit play, follow the show, and share this with a friend who needs a nudge toward clearer conversations. Subscribe, rate, and drop a review—what’s one communication habit you want to practice this week? • landing a radio role via production and mentorship • balancing a day job with weekend on-air shifts • body surfing competitions, judging, and community • training shifts from maxes to high-rep strength • fasting, kitchen discipline, and hydration • attraction, gym culture, and social cues • handling space versus fixing in conflict • honesty without cruelty in feedback • parents, privacy, and building trust at home • missing flirting signals and naming feelings • ending relationships with mutual respect • transparency with exes and current partners • first impressions and treating people well “Don’t forget to tune in Island 98.5 every weekend. Saturday 4–10 p.m., Sunday 10 a.m.–4 p.m. on iHeartRadio too.”

    1h 6m
  8. 11/20/2025

    Why Good Men Aren’t Gone, Labels, Lies & the Places We Find Ourselves with Kea

    Send us a text What makes someone “from” a place, and what belongs to blood, lineage, and lived experience? We bring that question home with Kea, who grew up in Hawaii, chased opportunity in Texas, and built a marketing career that runs on clarity, guts, and well-earned access. From island casual to mainland dress codes, rice cookers to nightclub NDAs, this conversation is a guided tour through identity, ambition, and the spaces where we decide who we are. We get real about dating standards without the drama. Kea lays out why “all the good men are taken” is a myth and how to look where your values live—gyms, book clubs, community spaces—by showing up consistently. We talk transparency with exes, when to speak up, when to keep walking, and why sneaky links are a symptom of unmet needs rather than a solution. On the big question—can WAP save a marriage—Kea doesn’t flinch: great sex without trust and communication just makes you roommates with chemistry. Beyond relationships, we dig into habits, books, and the underrated power of handwriting. Kea shares how writing things down improves memory, why she still writes letters in cursive, and how small, steady rituals build a life that holds. There’s humor too—calling out fad toys, plotting prank-filled wills, and laughing about crowded rooms—because self-awareness is lighter when you let it breathe. Her final confession might be your new safety protocol: run background checks, know who you’re dating, and protect your peace. If this resonates, tap follow, share with a friend who needs straighter lines and softer landings, and leave a review to help more listeners find the show. Your support helps us keep these real, useful conversations coming. • local identity vs Hawaiian ethnicity • raising kids with multiple cultures • moving for opportunity and entrepreneurship • island casual vs mainland dress codes • anxiety, safety, and crowded spaces • NDAs, networking, and building social proof • where to meet value-aligned partners • boundaries with exes and transparency rules • sneaky links, red flags, and respect • why WAP won’t fix broken communication • habits, books, memory, and handwriting • Kea’s confession about background checks

    59 min
5
out of 5
7 Ratings

About

The REALationship Method is a comedic podcast about dating, relationships, and advice, blending tips with plenty of tangents. With stories and experiences shared by the cast and guests, it offers cautionary tales to help you avoid making the same mistakes. So sit back, relax, and maybe learn a thing or ten!