The Secure Start® Podcast

Colby Pearce
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In the same way that a secure base is the springboard for the growth of the child, knowledge of past endeavours and lessons learnt are the springboard for growth in current and future endeavours.If we do not revisit the lessons of the past we are doomed to relearning them over and over again, with the result that we may never really achieve a greater potential.In keeping with the idea we are encouraged to be the person we wished we knew when we were starting out, it is my vision for the podcast that it is a place where those who work in child protection and out-of-home care can access what is/was already known, spring-boarding them to even greater insights. 

  1. #40: Rethinking Harmful Sexual Behaviour In Kids, with Alan Jenkins

    3D AGO

    #40: Rethinking Harmful Sexual Behaviour In Kids, with Alan Jenkins

    Send a text What if the biggest driver of harmful sexual behaviour in children isn’t deviance in the child, but disconnection in the systems around them? We sit down with Alan Jenkins—veteran practitioner, author of Becoming Ethical, and pioneer of “multi undisciplinary” teams—to rethink how shame, belonging, and power shape what children do and how adults respond. Across vivid stories from schools and services, Alan shows how our default reactions—suspensions, isolation, forensic labels—often deepen the very conditions that fuel harm. He traces a common pathway that starts with curiosity, is supercharged by isolation and low worth, and is reinforced by a culture that teaches sex as conquest and anaesthetic. Instead of fixating on acts alone, he urges us to assess what truly regulates a child: connection to people, a sense of worth, and supervised, guided places to belong. Central to this conversation is a sharp distinction between guilt and shame. Guilt is neat and cognitive; shame is affective and, when contained, becomes a compass. Alan calls it the shadow of love—the feeling that slows us down and attunes us to another’s boundary. Through careful, respectful work that first restores stories of loyalty, protest, and care, children can access imminent shame: the embodied “my God, what have I done?” that opens integrity and real repair. From there, practical steps follow—support circles, connection‑centred safety plans, and everyday opportunities to practise discretion. We also turn the lens on practitioners and supervisors. Urgency to “make them face it” is often picked up as demand and met with rightful protest. Alan outlines a parallel journey: if we expect a young person to consider the other’s experience, we must stay acutely aware of our impact. That stance disarms resistance, honours healthy protest, and creates the safety needed for ethical growth. If you work in schools, child protection, youth justice, or therapy—or you care about building communities where kids can belong without causing harm—this conversation offers a grounded, humane roadmap. Subscribe, share this episode with a colleague, and leave a review with one change you’ll make in your practice. Alan’s Bio: Alan has worked in a range of multi-undisciplinary teams addressing violence and abusive behaviour for more than 35 years. Rather than tire from this work, he has become increasingly intrigued with possibilities for the discovery of ethical, respectful and accountable ways of relating. The valuing of ethics, fairness and the importance of protest against injustice has led him to stray considerably from the path prescribed in his early training as a psychologist, towards a political analysis of abuse.  Alan’s most recent publication is ‘Becoming Ethical : A Parallel Political Journey With Men Who Have Abused,’ published in 2009. He was a director of Nada and managed the Mary St. Program for young people who have engaged in sexually harmful behaviour, along with their caregivers and communities. Links: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Finally, all references to case examples are anonymised to the extent that the actual case could not be identified, or are fictional but based on real-life examples for illustrative Support the show

    1h 19m
  2. #39: Sri Lanka’s Care System: Progress, Gaps, And Hope - Nimali Kumari

    FEB 14

    #39: Sri Lanka’s Care System: Progress, Gaps, And Hope - Nimali Kumari

    Send a text What if turning 18 didn’t mean turning off support? We sit down with Nimmu, a powerhouse care leaver advocate from Sri Lanka, to map what’s changing, what still hurts, and how to build a system that puts children where they thrive—whether that’s family, kinship, adoption, or residential care. With warmth and precision, Nimmu explains Sri Lanka’s current landscape: most children live in Child Development Centres, foster care is in development, and adoption and kinship care remain key alternatives. She shares how things have improved—care plans, school access, and more respectful language—while spotlighting stubborn gaps like early exits at 15–16, patchy counselling, and the silent crisis of IDs and addresses that lock young adults out of services, votes, and formal work. We dig into the headline reform: government housing grants of two million rupees for eligible care leavers. It’s a game-changer for stability, but eligibility needs to be fair, and support can’t stop at a house key. Nimmu argues for true readiness: mental health care that starts years before transition, life skills from banking to bus travel, self-defence and safety for girls, and therapeutic caregiving that doesn’t require a therapist—just trained, consistent, loving adults. The most powerful lever, she says, is family strengthening. Divorce, poverty, and crisis push children into institutions; smart aid, mediation, and cash transfers can keep them home. Nimmu also reveals the engine behind lasting change: peer networks. Through Generation Never Give Up and Rise Together, care leavers connect to jobs, legal help, hostels, and uni pathways. Their next step is a transition home—safe, non-stigmatising housing where young people can work or study, contribute to bills, and stabilise before moving on. It’s practical, dignified, and scalable. Across borders, care leavers are organising, sharing policy wins, and proving that voice plus community equals momentum. If you care about child protection, aftercare, trauma-informed practice, and social policy that actually works, this conversation will recalibrate your sense of what’s possible. Subscribe, share with a colleague, and leave a review telling us: what’s the one change your community could make this year to improve leaving care? Nimali’s Bio:  Affectionately known as Nimmu, Nimali is a care leaver from Sri Lanka who spent over a decade in institutional care. She holds a degree in Journalism, Advertising, and Mass Communication from NIILM University in India, along with additional qualifications in criminal investigation, psychology, and social sciences.  Nimali has represented Sri Lanka as a speaker at numerous international conferences, including  those focused on child protection and women’s rights in Nepal (2017), and the BICON International Conference in India in 2018 and 2021, in Nepal in 2023, and Malaysia in 2025. Recently, Nimali spoke at the 35th FICE International Conference in Croatia (2024).  In 2024, Nimali was honoured as a Young Change-Maker by the UN Ambassador and Neon Media. She is an active member of the Global Care Leavers Committee and member of the Care Leaders Council. She represented South Asian care leavers in the UN Resolution Focused Group (2019).  Nimali recently launched her autobiography ‘The Caged Girl: A Journey To justice’’ &  ‘’Dumburu Pathok ‘’ in Sinhala. Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce.  Support the show

    57 min
  3. #38: Why Emotional Reactions Are Data And How Organisations Can Turn Them Into Care, with Emma Higgs

    FEB 7

    #38: Why Emotional Reactions Are Data And How Organisations Can Turn Them Into Care, with Emma Higgs

    Send a text What if the feelings that make this work so hard are the very clues that make it effective? We sit down with Emma Higgs, a child and adolescent psychoanalytic psychotherapist and organisational therapist, to unpack how psychodynamic thinking turns raw emotion into reliable information—and how organisations can harness it to protect staff and truly help distressed children and families. Emma traces her journey from a turbulent, formative therapeutic community to co-leading APPCIOS, a home for practitioners who work psychodynamically outside traditional consulting rooms. We explore projection, countertransference and containment as essential tools: receiving what a child can’t yet put into words, digesting it, and returning it in tolerable, meaningful form. Along the way, we name the defensive practices that creep into CAMHS, social work, policing and schools—tick-boxes, rigid agendas, behaviour-only lenses—and show how they blunt humanity and block change. This is trauma-informed practice with depth. We contrast one-day courses and ACE scores with the lived, relational work that builds minds, restores thinking and creates hope. Emma lays out what a containing organisation looks like: clear boundaries and flexible minds, leadership that absorbs anxiety instead of spreading it, and scheduled spaces where teams can reflect, argue safely and lend each other their capacity to think. We talk about group dynamics, supervision, and why professional belonging isn’t a luxury but a clinical intervention in its own right. If you’re a teacher, social worker, police officer, clinician or leader, you’ll leave with a richer map for surviving the job without losing yourself—and a language for making sense of the “impossible” child or the overwhelmed team. Subscribe, share this with a colleague who needs it, and leave a review telling us the one practice you’ll change tomorrow. Emma's Bio: Emma Higgs is a senior Child and Adolescent Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist (ACP), Psychodynamic Organisational Therapist (BPC/APPCIOS), and Psychodynamic Psychotherapist (BPC), living and working in North West England. She has extensive clinical experience across a range of NHS CAMHS services, including inpatient settings and Parent–Infant services. Alongside her private practice, Emma works closely with organisations that support distressed children and families. She has been involved in developing and delivering a wide range of trainings for non-psychoanalytic professionals, helping them to think psychodynamically about their work. This includes bespoke training for social care professionals and the police, with a focus on children’s development and the impact of trauma. Emma is especially interested in how psychoanalytic thinking can be used more broadly within support services, and in exploring the interplay between the internal world, the external environment, and the wider socio-political context. Emma is also the Deputy CEO of the Association of Psychodynamic Practice and Counselling in Organisational Settings (APPCIOS), a charitable organisation dedicated to supporting clinicians and practitioners working with distressed individuals through the application of psychodynamic thinking and skills. Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Finally, all references to case examples are anonymised to the extent that the actual case could not be identified, or are fictional but based Support the show

    1h 30m
  4. #37: From Chaos To Calm: Routines, Relationships, And Real Change In Residential Care, Tom Ellison

    JAN 31

    #37: From Chaos To Calm: Routines, Relationships, And Real Change In Residential Care, Tom Ellison

    Send a text What if the most powerful “intervention” in residential care isn’t a therapy model at all, but the quiet predictability of daily life held by thoughtful adults? We sit down with social care consultant Tom Ellison to dig into what actually moves the dial for children who’ve lived through adversity: simple, stable routines, a clear primary task, and relationships that feel parental, enriched, and safe. Across a candid, story-rich conversation, we challenge the idea that progress begins with jargon or the latest training. Tom shares how reflective spaces keep teams aligned and emotionally grounded, so staff can swap firefighting for understanding. A striking case unpacks why a boy melted down around bath time, and how one missing detail from his history instantly changed the team’s feelings, responses, and outcomes. When we know a child’s story, behaviour starts to make sense; when life becomes predictably “boring,” anxiety fades and connection grows. We also explore admission as a major intervention in its own right. Claiming a child into the home, assigning a bridging key worker, and shaping the environment to feel warm and homely lay the foundation for belonging. From there, therapy finally has the right “dose” and context to work. Tom frames the residential role as parental but extraordinary, blending consistent authority with trauma-informed nuance. We talk boundaries, phones, and the hard edges of care, including how legal measures can blur authority and inflate costs without improving outcomes. What do alumni remember? Love, belonging, and the small, joyful rituals that said “you are ours.” If you’re building or leading a children’s home, or you work the front line, this conversation offers practical, human guidance: start with routines and roles, protect reflective time, learn one child deeply, and use authority like a good parent. Subscribe, share with a colleague, and leave a review to help more practitioners find tools that actually help kids heal. Tom's Bio: Tom is an accomplished Consultant and leadership trainer with over 30 years in children’s residential care, specialising in innovative leadership and mental health support for young people. Through Elevate Professional Development, launched in 2025, he delivers UK-wide workshops to strengthen care leadership. With 20 years of boardroom experience, Tom has consistently driven strategic leadership and service transformation. Holding a BPS-approved Psychology degree, a Master’s in Psychoanalytic Observational Studies, and postgraduate qualifications in Management and Strategic Management, he blends academic and practical expertise. Currently, he serves as Non-Executive Chair at AMMA Childcare Ltd, Non-Executive Director at Cedars Childcare Ltd and Empathy CIC, and advises the leadership teams of a number of organisations in the third and independent sectors. Links: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Support the show

    1h 32m
  5. #36: What If Behaviour Is Just Armour For Hurt? Vicki McKeown

    JAN 25

    #36: What If Behaviour Is Just Armour For Hurt? Vicki McKeown

    Send a text What if the behaviour that drives you up the wall is actually armour against shame? We sit down with psychotherapist and author Vicky McKeown to unpack how shame and attachment shape everyday life for children, parents, and the professionals who support them. From adoption and fostering to classrooms and case reports, we trace the subtle ways shame shows up and how a shift in language and stance can transform outcomes. Vicky shares her journey from criminology to trauma therapy and makes a strong case for working with the whole caregiving unit, not just “the child.” We break down Lisa Etherson’s shame containment theory in plain language: why shame fires when connection feels at risk, how people build protective strategies like perfectionism, aggression, or withdrawal, and what adults can do to respond without piling on more shame. We also challenge common behaviour tools in schools — public colour charts, red cards, and time-outs that silence kids but feed their inner critic — and offer simple, shame-aware alternatives that preserve dignity and teach skills. You’ll hear how Jake and His Shame Armour opens safe conversations at home and in therapy, plus practical exercises Vicky uses to map triggers, slow tricky moments, and help parents “own their stuff.” We talk frankly about child protection and adoption disruptions, why report language matters, and how moving from blame to context supports real change while holding responsibility. If you care about trauma-informed practice, attachment, adoption, or behaviour in schools, this is a grounded, hands-on guide to seeing the mind behind the behaviour and building safety that lasts. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a colleague or friend, and leave a quick review — what’s one shame-aware change you’ll try this week? Vicki's Bio: Vicki McKeown is a qualified social worker, psychotherapeutic counsellor, and trauma-informed practitioner with over 15 years of experience supporting children, families, and professionals around attachment, shame, and relational trauma. She is the co-author of Jake and His Shame Armour, a children’s book underpinned by Lisa Etherson’s Shame Containment Theory. Through her work with VLM Therapy Ltd and Better Me Better Us Ltd, Vicki provides specialised training, consultation, and therapeutic support, helping individuals, families and organisations build safer, more connected, and emotionally attuned environments. Links: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Podcast site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.buzzsprout.com Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Further, any advice discussed is general in nature and does not replace clinical advice from a treating clinician. Support the show

    1h 1m
  6. #34: Making the conscious unconscious, with Peter Blake

    JAN 18

    #34: Making the conscious unconscious, with Peter Blake

    Send a text I am very excited to release my conversation with Peter Blake on The Secure Start Podcast. We explore how children communicate through behaviour and play, why containment matters, and how to balance understanding with practical management. We share tools to notice meaning, time conversations well, and use a child’s passions to build safety, trust, and growth. • why being relaxed and steady allows containment  • inner and outer worlds shaping behaviour  • OTT method: observe, think, talk in good time  • early anxieties, attachment, and security needs  • unrepressed unconscious and right-brain attunement  • play as the medium for change  • joining passions to say “your mind matters”  • naming thinking without therapy-speak  • projective identification and holding strong feelings  • signs therapy can wind down responsibly Across a warm, grounded conversation, Peter explains how to Observe, Think, and Talk in a way that children can digest, and why the right moment and tone matter more than the perfect words. We dive into early anxieties, attachment security, and the “unrepressed unconscious”—experiences from infancy that live in the body and spill into relationships. You’ll hear practical examples of responding rather than reacting, repairing ruptures, and using ordinary moments to create extraordinary change. Play takes centre stage as the engine of therapy. From computer games to surfboards and movie obsessions, passions carry emotional truth; joining them says “your mind matters.”  We also explore endings: how to recognise steadier behaviour, more integrative play, and a more ordinary, balanced bond as signals that therapy can wind down, with other relationships now carrying the holding. If you’re a parent, teacher, therapist, or carer, you’ll leave with a clearer map: keep boundaries firm, language simple, curiosity open, and focus on creating a felt experience of being known. That’s where change settles in.  Peter's Bio: Peter is a Clinical Psychologist and Tavistock trained child and adolescent psychotherapist. For 25 years Peter worked in child and family teams in Community Health Centres in England and Australia. For the last 25 years he has worked in private practice in Sydney. He was the Foundation President of the Child Psychoanalytic Foundation, a charity  based in Sydney. He is currently Director of the Institute of Child and Adolescent Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy ( ICAPP). This is a training body offering child and adolescent psychotherapy, based in Sydney but offered online.  He has lectured in a number of Australian Universities and has given workshops to professionals across Australia. The third edition of his book, “Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy: Maaking the Conscious Unconscious” (2021, Routledge), is now useed as a textbook in a number of different countries. It has been translated into Georgian and Mandarin. He has contributed to numerous publications and Journals. Links: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Further, any advice discussed is general in nature and does not replace clinical advice from a treating clinician.  Support the show

    1h 27m
  7. #35: What If Children's Safeguarding Began With Love? Carla Keyte

    JAN 11

    #35: What If Children's Safeguarding Began With Love? Carla Keyte

    Send a text What if the most powerful safeguarding tool isn’t another form, but a steady adult who shows up with love? That’s the heart of my conversation with Carla Keyte, founder of Lighthouse and a leading voice in UK residential care, as we unpack how safe, stable, loving homes are built—and measured—through relationships, not fear. We explore how love-led practice, not fear-based compliance, creates safe, stable, loving homes in residential care. We trace the sector’s language shift from behaviour management to relational healing, and ask the tough question: how do we evaluate what children actually feel? Carla makes a compelling case that compliance is essential but should be the floor, not the ceiling. She explains why incident counts miss the lived experience of safety, and how psychologically safe teams create environments where children can play, connect, and grow. We dive into the Lighthouse model—safeguard the child, stabilise adults through supervision and reflective practice, and strengthen the home’s culture and governance—so that regulation supports, rather than stifles, love-led care. We also challenge the idea that professional boundaries mean emotional distance. Drawing on attachment and neuroscience, Carla shows how attuned relationships rebuild trust and reduce fear. We explore how inspections could function as safeguarding partnerships, bringing multi-agency expertise to design therapeutic interventions instead of handing out labels. From Scotland’s Promise to extending support beyond 18, we highlight the policies that protect the human connection that truly changes lives. If you care about residential care quality, trauma-informed practice, and practical ways to create homes where children feel they matter, this conversation offers a clear, hopeful path forward. About Carla: Carla is the Founder and Director of Lighthouse, bringing extensive expertise in quality, compliance, and safeguarding across the residential childcare sector in the UK. With a background spanning Registered Manager, Head of Care, and Head of Quality & Compliance for an organisation operating over 30 homes rated Good and Outstanding, Carla has deep, practical insight into operational leadership, regulatory compliance, and governance.   Carla has a proven track record of resolving complex compliance issues and supporting organisations through challenging regulatory actions. Her specialism lies in developing and embedding Quality and Governance frameworks that drive sustainable improvement and ensure the highest standards of care.   Passionate about love-led practice and the power of meaningful relationships, Carla champions approaches that create safe, nurturing, and stable environments where children and young people can truly thrive.   Carla founded Lighthouse to provide expert guidance and tailored support to providers navigating an increasingly complex regulatory landscape. The name Lighthouse reflects Carla’s vision: to act as a guiding beacon for organisations, illuminating the path through complexity toward excellence in care, safeguarding, and relational practice. Links: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Support the show

    57 min
  8. Ordinary Life, Extraordinary Care - A Recap of 2025 on The Secure Start Podcast

    12/31/2025

    Ordinary Life, Extraordinary Care - A Recap of 2025 on The Secure Start Podcast

    Send a text This is a recap of the first 33 episodes of The Secure Start Podcast, all released in 2025.  It has been an incredible honour to host them and I am looking forward to 2026! If you take something inspirational from the video, please consider liking and subscribing to this channel and related platforms. Links: Podcast Blog Site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.com/ Podcast site: https://thesecurestartpodcast.buzzsprout.com Secure Start Site: https://securestart.com.au/ Please also consider becoming as member on my Patreon page. Membership is free, but you can also take up a paid membership if you would like to support the ongoing development of the podcast. Visit: Patreon:  https://www.patreon.com/c/TheSecureStartPodcast Disclaimer: Information reported by guests of this podcast is assumed to be accurate as stated. Podcast owner Colby Pearce is not responsible for any error of facts presented by podcast guests. In addition, unless otherwise specified, opinions expressed by guests of this podcast may not reflect those of the podcast owner, Colby Pearce. Support the show

    14 min
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About

In the same way that a secure base is the springboard for the growth of the child, knowledge of past endeavours and lessons learnt are the springboard for growth in current and future endeavours.If we do not revisit the lessons of the past we are doomed to relearning them over and over again, with the result that we may never really achieve a greater potential.In keeping with the idea we are encouraged to be the person we wished we knew when we were starting out, it is my vision for the podcast that it is a place where those who work in child protection and out-of-home care can access what is/was already known, spring-boarding them to even greater insights. 

Information

  • Creator
    Colby Pearce
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    42
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Secure Start® Podcast
  • Show Website
    The Secure Start® Podcast