The Soul Enchilada Laura Busse and Christine Ruth M.Div., MS, LMFT

This week we wrap up our Holiday deep-dive by talking about how to get through them when they’re full of holes.
Those holes can be in the form of an empty seat at the table from a new loss, an old loss that continues to blindside us this time every year, or even just our own unmet expectations for how things should turn out.
We never really “fill” those holes, but we can avoid getting trapped in them by giving ourselves permission to grieve… the way WE need to and on our OWN timeline .
Easier said than done, but nonetheless very do-able. So listen in and we’ll talk about how.
Real, Raw, and Relevant discussion questions:
1. Where do you notice grief or loss coming up during this season of your life? 
2. When have you been "blindsided" by grief in a time when you thought you were supposed to be happy?
3. How can you give yourself permission to grieve the way you're wired, on your own timeline?
4. Mourning is the outward expression of grief. Christine and Laura gave us several tools for mourning (journaling, painting, exercising, cooking, singing, crying...) How can you schedule time to acknowledge, name your emotions, and use some of these tools to mourn in a safe space? 
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this.
Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app

You survived Thanksgiving! Nice job… but the holidays ain’t over yet. So this week we wanted to tackle this listener question:
“I don’t get along with my in-laws. How do I set boundaries with the most difficult people in my life?”
Setting boundaries before you get together may seem a little weird, like you’re being high-maintenance. But boundaries are beautiful. You can meet your needs, while at the same time honoring the needs of the people around you… even the difficult ones.
How do you do it? Well, we rely on a lot of C-words, so it’s worth a listen.
Real, Raw, and Relevant discussion questions:
1. Real – Who do you need to openly communicate your expectations
with during this season?
2. Raw – What holds you back from setting healthy boundaries with the
most difficult people in your life?
3. Relevant – How can you honor your own limits and practice self-
compassion during stressful times of the year? How can you do the
same for the difficult people in your life?
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this.
Have a questions for us? Send it to questions@soulenchilada.com
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app

Thanksgiving is a couple of days away, so this week we wanted to tackle this listener
question:
“My anxiety ramps up in social settings, so I tend dread the holidays. Any advice for preparing for, calming down, and enjoying the holidays this year?”
Most of us have at least some degree of anxiety around the holiday season. It may be trying to meet the expectations of others, or those we have of ourselves. It may be the dredging up of bad memories. It may be that there’s a new empty seat at the table. (Or a full seat, occupied by that one crazy relative who’s just waiting to blow things up).
This week we talk strategies for letting yourself off the hook and maybe even enjoying your holiday season, because Thanksgiving is not a competitive sport.
Real, Raw, and Relevant discussion questions:
1. How would you describe your level of anxiety during the holidays?
2. Christine opened a photo album in Laura’s mind to past holidays. What
positive and negative memories popped into your mind while they were
discussing holiday “trauma” due to expectations and family conflict?
3. How might you bust out of the traditional mold of the holidays this year to
grow gratitude or make beautiful connections with people you love?
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this.
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app

We know that we’re made up of lots of different parts. But what do we do when our “pissed off” part seems to rule the roost?
This week’s listener question is: “ I feel angry all the time. I’m angry at work, home, while driving, everywhere I go. How do I deal with my pissed off parts?”
Suppressing anger just makes us bitter, and eventually comes out sideways in the form of broken dishes, shattered relationships, and an occasional fractured toe.
This week we talk through strategy of befriending our anger. Give a little, take a little, and eventually learn to live together…the best of frienemies.
Real, Raw & Relevant Discussion Questions:
1. Where is anger showing up in your life these days?
2. How was anger expressed in your family of origin?  
3. What strategies do you currently use to “manage” your anger? (Denying it, stuffing it, attempting to eat it away, etc.) 
4. What might anger's invitation be for you, were you to greet and befriend it?  
5. What might your angry part need? How might you take responsibility for meeting that need? 
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this.
Share your hot mess with us, or just ask a question at: questions@soulenchilada.com
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app

We may look like we’re in one piece, but we’re really just a bunch of parts. Kind of like a junk drawer.
And each part has a voice that’s competing for our attention. Whether it’s Perfectionist Peggy, Pollyanna People-Pleaser, Bitchy Queen, or just some random Pissed-Off Parts, we are constantly being nagged.
This week’s question is: “What do I do when all my parts are screaming at the same time?”
Well, let’s figure that out together, and see which parts we can toss out of our junk drawer to better run our race of faith.
Enjoy the podcast. If you want to share it with friends or your small group, here are some questions you can talk over afterwards:
1. Acknowledgement – When you think about this past week, what are a few of your loudest "parts"?
2. Ask – Identify one of your parts. What does that part need? If you don't pay attention to it, what might it do? (Remember... the crying baby...)
3. An Invitation – Laura explained that her anxious part led her to look at her calendar. What might be an invitation one of your parts has for you?
4. Advocate – Who could you share this podcast with? Thanks!
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE this.
Share your hot mess with us, or just ask a question at: questions@soulenchilada.com
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app

We women are pretty good at getting help with the things we need. Car broken down? We call a mechanic… Gallbladder acting up? We call a doctor… Lost? We ask for directions…
But when it comes to our emotional health, many of us choose to hold it in and try to push through alone.
This week, we tackle the question: “Why are so many Christian women skeptical about therapy?”
Enjoy the podcast. If you want to share it with friends or your small group, here are some questions you can talk over afterwards:
1. When you were growing up, did your family keep secrets? If so, why do you think they did?
2. What attitudes about therapy did you grow up hearing &/or believing?
3. Do you have a "band of sisters" to be real, raw, and relevant with?
4. What makes a small group or friendship feel safe to you? 5. Who can you invite to join this podcast?
Thanks for listening! Please LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and SHARE the podcast.
Share your hot mess with us, or just ask a question at: questions@soulenchilada.com
Learn more about Laura and The 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/
Learn more about Christine Ruth: http://www.christineruth.com/
Learn more about Laura’s Faith Studies: https://www.3oclockwakeup.com/bible-studies
Download the free 3 O’Clock Wake Up Call App: https://subsplash.com/the3oclockwakeupc/app