Two Crones And A Book

Chell and Annette
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Books
  • Updated Biweekly

Your hosts Chell and Annette will give you honest reviews and share book‑themed rambles that may or may not, on occasions, take a dark and twisty, if not bizarre turn. Be warned: episodes may contain spoilers and language that some listeners may find offensive, thus the explicit rating. Consider yourself warned! Now take a seat and buckle up, buttercup…

  1. 2d ago

    Ep 126 Ramble If you could give one fictional character a completely unnecessary makeover, who are you glam‑croning and why?

    In this Ramble, the crones unleash their most chaotic creative energy yet as they tackle the question nobody asked but everybody should: If you could give one fictional character a completely unnecessary makeover, who are you glam‑croning and why? Naturally, Chell and Annette take this prompt to unhinged heights transforming iconic characters into versions of themselves that absolutely did not need to exist. 🧙‍♀️Annette’s Glam‑Crone Makeover Phantom of the Opera → Modern‑Day Tech Billionaire Annette drags the dramatic masked menace straight into Silicon Valley, where he becomes a brooding tech mogul disrupting opera with questionable apps, algorithmic angst, and venture‑capital cape couture. 🧙‍♀️Chell’s Glam‑Crone Makeovers Miss Havisham → Decay‑Positive Lifestyle Guru Great Expectations by Charles Dickens Chell reimagines Miss Havisham as a rot‑core wellness influencer who turns mould into a mindset and heartbreak into a brand. Lisa Evans → Liminal Transit Witch Platform 7 by Louise Doughty Lisa becomes a spectral commuter‑crone haunting train stations with petty magic and emotional wisdom. Hercule Poirot → Fussy Hedge Witch Detective The Mysterious Affair at Styles (and many others) by Agatha Christie Poirot becomes a cottage‑core witch solving tiny village disputes withherb lore and passive‑aggressive tea readings. It’s a ramble full of laughter, witchy nonsense, and makeovers nobody asked for but everyone will enjoy. Grab a drink, settle in, and let the crones glam‑crone their way through literature’s most unsuspecting characters.

  2. Sep 1

    Ep 125 Chat n Cackle – Summer Finds

    📚Chat n Cackle: Summer Reads & What’s Next (and it’s a long one!) This Chat n Cackle is a gloriously oversized one, a full hour of bookish chaos as Chell and Annette unpack everything they devoured over the summer, what they’re currently reading, and the titles already haunting their TBRs. It’s longer than usual because, frankly, the crones had a lot to say. 🧙‍♀️ Chell’s Summer Stack Chell takes a tour through courtroom suspense in Judge Stone by Viola Davies & James Patterson, the creeping dread of Starving Saints by Caitlin Starling, and the reflective emotional journey of The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. She also shares two bite-sized horrors, Helpmeet by Naben Ruthnum and Crossroads by Laurel Hightower, plus the vampiric chills of The Brides by Charlotte Cross, the powerful historical fiction of The Women by Kristin Hannah, and the tense mystery of The Caretaker by Marcus Kiewer. 📖 Now Reading:  Cabin in the Woods by Sarah Alderson  🔮 Next Up:  The House at Phantom Park by Graham Masterton  🧙‍♀️ Annette’s Recent Reads Annette brings an equally eclectic pile, starting with the uncanny and unmatched Knock Knock Open Wide by Neil Sharpson and the eerie and wonderfully bizarre Crypt of the Moon Spider by Nathan Ballingrud. She also dives into epic adventures of The HMRC (Her Majesty's Royal Coven) Trilogy by Juno Dawson, the survival-driven tension of What We Did to Survive by Megan Lally, and the heartfelt contemporary fiction of Things You Save in a Fire by Katherine Center. 📖 Now Reading:  Graveyard Shifts by M. L. Rio, Helen of Nowhere by Makenna Goodman, and Mythos by Stephen Fry  🔮 Next Up: Clown in a Cornfield 4 – Lights! Camera! Frendo! by Adam Cesare It’s a longer episode, but that just means more laughs, more recommendations, and more chances to grow your already unmanageable TBR pile. Grab a drink, get comfy, and settle in for an hour with the Two Crones. #twocronesandabook #summerreads # books #podcast #funny

  3. Aug 18

    Ep 124 Ramble - What’s the most unhinged place you’ve ever read a book

    This week on Two Crones and a Book, we’re confessing thetruly unhinged places we’ve cracked open a book. From questionable public seating to wildly inconvenient life moments, we reveal the spots where our need to read absolutely overpowered common sense.   Expect cackling, judgement (mostly of ourselves), and the comforting knowledge that no matter where you’ve read… we’ve probably readsomewhere stranger.   SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠twocronespodcast@gmail.com⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #ChaoticReaders #UnhingedReadingSpots#BookishRamble #CroneEnergy

  4. Aug 4

    Ep 123 Bingo A book published in a decade before you were born

    This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel whisked the crones back in time — to stories born long before either of them arrived on this earth. And oh, did they dig up some strange treasures. Chell plunged into The Beetle by Richard Marsh, a gloriously bizarre slice of Victorian horror packed with melodrama, shapeshifting menace, and enough gothic chaos to make even Dracula look like he needs to up his game. She unravels the wild plot twists, the theatrical dread, and the deliciously unhinged energy that only 1890s fiction can deliver. Annette, meanwhile, explored The Birds by Frank Baker — the eerie, atmospheric novel that pre‑dated Hitchcock and brought a quieter, more creeping sense of dread to the idea of nature turning against us. She dives into its slow‑burn tension, its uncanny mood, and the unsettling feeling that something feathered is always watching. Together, the crones compare two very different flavours of vintage terror — one campy and chaotic, one quiet and creeping — and celebrate the strange magic of reading stories from decades past. It’s another bingo adventure full of cackles, analysis, and peak crone energy. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠⁠twocronespodcast@gmail.com⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #VintageReads #BeforeWeWereBorn #TheBeetle #RichardMarsh #VictorianHorror #GothicFiction #TheBirds #FrankBaker #ClassicCreeps #OldSchoolHorror #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead

  5. Jul 21

    Ep 122 Ramble - Which book would you confidently lie about having read

    This week on Two Crones and a Book, we open the dustycupboard of literary shame and ask the big question: Which book would you confidently lie about having read? Join us as we confess the classics we’ve dodged, the doorstoppers we’ve pretended to ‘love’ and the titles we only know from memes. Expect cackling, guilt‑free honesty, and the occasional dramatic gasp as weexpose each other’s bookish secrets. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠twocronespodcast@gmail.com⁠   #TwoCronesAndABook #BookishConfessions #RambleEpisode#LiteraryLies #BookPodcast

  6. Jul 7

    Ep 121 Bingo A book recommended by someone you know

    This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel sent the crones down the path of personal recommendations — and the results could not have been more unsettling, eerie, or deliciously crone‑appropriate. Chell tackled I Who Have Never Known Men by Jacqueline Harpman, a stark, haunting, post‑apocalyptic tale that blends isolation, mystery, and existential dread. She dives into the emotional weight, the unanswered questions, and the quiet devastation that makes this slim novel linger long after the final page. Annette, meanwhile, read Victorian Psycho by Virginia Feito, a stylish psychological thriller dripping with gothic tension and razor‑sharp character work. She explores the spiralling mind games, the creeping paranoia, and the elegant menace that defines Feito’s storytelling. Together, the crones unpack how recommendations from friends can lead to wildly different reading experiences — from bleak dystopian introspection to lush psychological unraveling. It’s another bingo episode full of cackles, opinions, and peak crone energy. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠twocronespodcast@gmail.com⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #ReadersOfInstagram #BookChat #BookTalk #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #RecommendedReads #FriendRecs #IWhoHaveNeverKnownMen #JacquelineHarpman #DystopianReads #PostApocalypticFiction #VictorianPsycho #VirginiaFeito #PsychologicalThriller #GothicVibes #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead

  7. Jun 23

    Ep 120 Ramble - What’s a book title that perfectly sums up your life or at least your last week

    In this week’s ramble, the crones dive into the strangely therapeutic art of diagnosing your life with book titles. Because sometimes the only way to make sense of a week is to let literature do the talking.   Annette arrives armed with a trio of titles that paint a picture all on their own: the existential haze of The Plague by Albert Camus, the tender exhaustion of If the Body Allows It by Megan Cummins and the slow, contemplative survival energy of The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating by Elisabeth Tova Bailey. If that doesn’t sum up a week, what does.   Chell, meanwhile, needs only one title to capture the full emotional landscape: A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snickett. Sometimes simplicity is the most honest form of storytelling.   Together, the crones unpack why these titles hit so hard,how books become emotional shorthand and what it means when your life starts sounding like a syllabus of chaos.   Settle in for a cozy, candid, and slightly unhinged chat because if you can’t laugh at your own plot twists, what’s the point. #BookTitlesAsMood #LifeInBookTitles #BookishRamble #TwoCronesAndABook #ThePlague #AlbertCamus#IfTheBodyAllowsIt #MeganCummins #TheSoundOfAWildSnailEating #ElisabethTovaBailey#ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents #LemonySnicket #ChaoticWeekReads #ExistentialReads #BookishHumor #ReadersOfInstagram #BookPodcast

  8. Jun 14

    Ep 119 BINGO A book with a colour in the title

    This week on Two Crones and a Book, the bingo wheel demanded colour and the crones delivered. Chell dives into Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey, a memoir‑meets‑life‑philosophy mashup full of wild stories, questionable decisions and the kind of cosmic yee‑haw wisdom only McConaughey can get away with. Was it profound? Was it unhinged? Was it both? Chell has thoughts. Meanwhile, Annette ventures into the haunting world of The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. She unpacks the creeping dread, the feminist fury, and the wallpaper pattern that absolutely refuses to mind its own business. Together, the crones compare notes on colour, chaos, and how two books with hues in their titles can live on completely different ends of the literary spectrum. Grab your bingo cards, settle in, and let the crones guide you through another gloriously bookish adventure. SPOILERS, MATURE THEMES AND LANGUAGE SOME LISTENERS MAYFIND OFFENSIVE. Contact us on: ⁠twocronespodcast@gmail.com⁠ #TwoCronesAndABook #BookPodcast #ReadersOfInstagram #BookDiscussion #BookCommunity #PodcastLife #BookChat #BookTalk #BookBingo #ReadingBingo #ColourInTheTitle #ColourReads #ThemedReading #Greenlights #MatthewMcConaughey #McConaugheyMemoir #AlrightAlrightAlright #MemoirLovers #TheYellowWallpaper #CharlottePerkinsGilman #ClassicLit #FeministLit #GothicFiction #CroneEnergy #ChaoticReaders #BookishChaos #CronesWhoRead

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Ratings & Reviews

About

Your hosts Chell and Annette will give you honest reviews and share book‑themed rambles that may or may not, on occasions, take a dark and twisty, if not bizarre turn. Be warned: episodes may contain spoilers and language that some listeners may find offensive, thus the explicit rating. Consider yourself warned! Now take a seat and buckle up, buttercup…

Information

  • Creator
    Chell and Annette
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    130
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Chell and Annette
  • Show Website
    Two Crones And A Book