Unapologetically Sensitive Patricia Young

The Importance of Self-Regulation, Self-Compassion and Connection
 
Patricia discusses her feelings of annoyance and disappointment when her scheduled recording with Jen is cancelled. The conversation highlights the complexities of managing emotions and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships. She also discusses her experience of transitioning from an expansive state to a contractive state and the challenges that come with it. She talks about managing dysregulation, the impact of trauma work and OCD, and the importance of self-compassion.
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
Patricia explores her attachment style, OCD, and preoccupation with Jen, as well as her efforts to regulate her nervous system. Patricia also reflects on the challenges that arise from the different ways she and Jen navigate time and commitments. She emphasizes the importance of self-regulation and the need for connection in her relationship with Jen. Overall,
Takeaways
·         Different individuals have different attachment styles and ways of navigating time and commitments.
·         Self-regulation is important for managing emotions and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships.
·         Open communication and understanding can help navigate challenges in relationships.
·         Recognizing and challenging OCD lies can prevent spiraling into negative thought patterns.
·         Transitioning between expansive and contractive states is a normal part of being human.
·         Managing dysregulation and finding ways to self-soothe are important during contractive states.
·         Trauma work and OCD can add additional challenges to the process.
·         Self-compassion and acceptance of all emotions and experiences are crucial.
·         Validation and support from others can help navigate difficult times.
·         Fears and anxieties as a parent are valid and should be acknowledged and addressed.
Sound Bites
"I'm annoyed and I'm disappointed."
"I have a need to be, feel like we've got autonomy over things."
"Timeliness, making commitments about things often are more challenging for her."
"I noticed probably about a week ago, I went into what I call an expansive state."
"I know that I do not maintain this expansive state and that at some point I will drop back into a contractive state."
"It felt nice to go into this very expansive space and I could feel myself kind of dropping down out of it."
Chapters
Navigating Attachment Styles and Time Management
Uncertainty and Preoccupation in Relationships
Challenging OCD Lies and Managing Emotions
Communication and Understanding in Relationships
Navigating the Expansive and Contractive States
Managing Dysregulation and Self-Soothing
Challenges of Trauma Work and OCD
The Power of Self-Compassion
Validating Fears and Anxieties
Finding Support and Acceptance
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
LIN

Navigating Reconnection after Rupture: Messiness Is a Healthy Part of Relationships
 
Patricia and Jen discuss the challenges of reconnecting after a rupture in their relationship. They explore the fear of not being able to get back to normal and the desire for rupture and repair in significant relationships. They also discuss the importance of authenticity, setting boundaries, and being clear about needs and expectations. They touch on topics such as OCD, panic attacks, and the process of growth and transformation.
 
CO-HOST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
In this conversation, Patricia and Jen discuss their current emotional states and the challenges they are facing. They explore topics such as discomfort, identity, accuracy in sharing personal experiences, and the process of unmasking. They also touch on the importance of honoring individual processes and the impact of communication and responsiveness in relationships. Patricia shares her experiences with OCD and the need for connection, while Jen reflects on the need for self-care and exploring new directions. Overall, the conversation highlights the importance of self-awareness, authenticity, and growth.
Takeaways
·         Honor your own process and don't feel pressured to share or show up in a certain way.
·         Recognize the impact of communication and responsiveness in relationships.
·         Embrace self-awareness and explore new directions for personal growth.
·         Practice authenticity and unmasking to find joy and connection. Reconnecting after a rupture in a relationship can be challenging and may require starting over to rebuild the connection.
·         Fear of not being able to get back to normal after a rupture is common, but rupture and repair are a natural part of significant relationships.
·         Authenticity, setting boundaries, and clear communication about needs and expectations are essential for maintaining healthy relationships.
·         It is important to recognize and manage conditions like OCD and panic attacks, and to seek support and self-care when needed.
·         Growth and transformation in relationships require navigating uncertainty and being open to change.
Sound Bites
·         "Hey, Patricia, that feels like a trick question these days."
·         "I'm feeling a little uncomfortable."
·         "I get excited that we're willing to talk about some of the things that are difficult."
·         "But it's not like when I reconnect with you, I go oh, we're connected. It's like I lose that and we almost have to start over again for me to get that connection."
·         "The if onlys, right? The if only we do this right, then we're never gonna have to do it again."
Chapters (please adjust for the addition of the introduction)
00:00 Introduction and Expressing Discomfort
03:02 Navigating Identity and Accuracy in Sharing
07:58 The Impact of Communication and Responsiveness
11:52 Embracing Self-Awareness and Exploring New Directions
23:38 Reconnecting After Rupture
28:22 Authenticity and Setting Boundaries in Relationships
30:15 Managing Conditions like OCD and Panic Attacks
32:20 The Process of Growth and Transformation in Relationships
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired dif

Taking up Space and Expressing Your Feelings is Important for Healing Attachment Injuries
 
Patricia shares her experiences of her recent trip to Chicago. She discusses the challenges she faced in navigating changes in plans and the emotions that arose during her son's graduation from boot camp. Patricia also explores the importance of creating a secure attachment in her relationship with Jen and the need to ask for what she wants and needs with both Jen and her son. She emphasizes the significance of taking up space, expressing feelings, and finding support in managing attachment injuries.
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Takeaways
 
·         Navigating changes in plans and unexpected events can be challenging, especially for individuals with attachment injuries.
·         Creating a secure attachment in relationships involves open communication, asking for what you want and need, and being aware of your own emotions and triggers.
·         Taking up space and expressing your feelings is important for healing attachment injuries and building healthier relationships.
·         Finding support from trusted individuals can help regulate emotions and provide a sense of security.
·         Managing attachment injuries is an ongoing process that requires self-awareness, self-compassion, and patience.
 
Sound Bites
"Navigating changes in plans and unexpected events can be challenging"
"Creating a secure attachment in relationships involves open communication"
"Taking up space and expressing your feelings is important for healing attachment injuries"
Chapters please allow for the addition of the introduction
00:00 Introduction and Disappointment
08:27 Emotional Challenges of Departure and Goodbyes
13:46 Creating a Secure Attachment in Relationships
16:19 Taking Up Space and Expressing Feelings
28:00 Managing Attachment Injuries: An Ongoing Process
31:45 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
LINKS
 
Neurodivergent Online Course-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/neurodivergent-online-courses/
 
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Anger and Attachment: Navigating Different Neurotypes Within a Relationship
Patricia and Jen explore the dynamics of attachment injuries, ADHD, and autism within their friendship. They explore the challenges of communication, time orientation, and emotional regulation. They touch on the concept of platonic life partnership and the challenges navigating different attachment styles and the impact of past trauma on present interactions. They discuss the importance of setting expectations, creating safe containers for communication, and validating each other's emotions.
 
CO-HOST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
The conversation delves into the complexities of attachment wounds, communication styles, and emotional regulation within a friendship.
Takeaways
·         The impact of attachment injuries, ADHD, and autism on communication and emotional regulation in friendships.
·         The challenges of navigating differences in time orientation and managing expectations within a friendship.
·         The concept of platonic life partnership and its relevance in fostering secure attachments and meaningful connections in friendships.
·         Navigating attachment wounds and communication styles in friendships can be complex and challenging.
·         Understanding the impact of past trauma on present interactions is crucial for building empathy and connection.
·         Setting clear expectations and creating safe containers for communication can help navigate emotional triggers and attachment injuries in friendships.
·         Validating each other's emotions and experiences is essential for building trust and understanding in a friendship.
Additional Takeaways:
Understanding the importance of having important conversations and finding the right time for them. Exploring vulnerability and the fear of being misunderstood or perceived as angry. Acknowledging feelings of frustration and hopelessness in relationships. Validating the range of human emotions, including anger, and the need to express them fully. Reflecting on personal tendencies and vulnerabilities, such as attachment injuries. Recognizing the impact of dysregulation and expressing anger in a healthy manner. Navigating feelings of anger and the desire for mutual understanding in relationships. Balancing the need for connection with the challenges and pain of relationships. Embracing vulnerability and seeking growth through therapy and self-reflection. Learning to communicate effectively and manage difficult emotions in relationships. Exploring the complexities of attachment styles and their influence on behavior. Cultivating self-awareness and empathy towards oneself and others. Addressing past traumas and their effects on present relationships. Practicing self-care and setting boundaries to maintain emotional well-being. Embracing change and growth through ongoing self-reflection and therapy. Building resilience and coping strategies for navigating challenging emotions. Fostering healthy communication patterns and conflict resolution skills. Recognizing the importance of seeking support and guidance in times of emotional distress. Embracing authenticity and vulnerability as pathways to personal healing and growth. Encouraging listeners to engage in self-discovery and emotional exploration for personal development. Sound Bites
"Having these conversations is important."
"I'm doing the best I can in my unmedicated, very sloppy way."
"Those are gonna be the labels that you're gonna have if you don't want the label."
"Navigating attachment wounds and communication styles in friendships can be complex and challenging."
"Understanding the impact of past trauma on present interactions is crucial for building empathy and connection."
"Setting clear expectations and creating safe containers for communication c

PDA & Empowering Autonomy: Navigating Uncertainty and Travel Preparation
 
Patricia discusses her experiences with attachment injuries, being activated, anxiety, and preparing for travel. She shares insights into managing her emotions and navigating relationships through the lens of autism with a PDA profile. Patricia asserts her need for autonomy, feelings of powerlessness, and the challenges of managing uncertainty. Patricia also explores her experiences with OCD, hypervigilance, and the impact of early childhood trauma on her current behaviors and thought patterns.
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Takeaways
·         Exploring attachment injuries and the impact on relationships
·         Managing anxiety and OCD symptoms
·         Navigating travel preparations and the challenges of change and uncertainty
·         Understanding the impact of early childhood trauma on current behaviors
·         Coping with autism and sensory processing
 
Ways to reclaim a sense of agency and control when faced with feelings of powerlessness.
Acknowledge the lack of control and see if there are ways to be more proactive in daily life. Focus on stepping back into your life and regaining a sense of autonomy. Address attachment injuries and work towards healing and growth. Engage in activities that help manage anxiety, especially in anticipation of upcoming events like travel, or where there’s uncertainty. Utilize skills and coping mechanisms to navigate challenges that can activate your nervous system. Seek comfort in preparedness and organization, such as creating packing lists and to-do lists (IF this brings you comfort). Maintain open communication with family or support systems to process emotions and work through difficulties.  
Strategies for travel to increase your sense of autonomy, reduce anxiety, and promote a smoother travel experience.
Create a universal packing list to streamline the packing process. Develop a to-do list for tasks related to travel arrangements and pet care, childcare, plant care, etc. Utilize familiar items like a fleece throw for comfort during the trip. Opt for direct flights to minimize the stress of layovers. Communicate openly with family members or travel companions to address concerns and plan activities effectively. Embrace routines and familiar items to provide comfort and stability in new environments. Engage in troubleshooting and forecasting to anticipate potential challenges and mitigate anxiety. Make a plan, but try and have some flexibility for unanticipated changes. Sound Bites
"I think probably the easiest place to start is the attachment injuries."
"It's just fascinating to watch. It's also really annoying AF."
Chapters please allow for the addition of the introduction
00:00 Navigating Attachment Injuries and Emotional Management
13:39 Challenges of Travel Preparations and Coping Strategies
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
LINK

Friendships Paradigms: Monogamy and Polyamory and Platonic Partnerships
 
Patricia discusses the concept of monogamy and polyamory in friendships and platonic partnerships. She explores how the traditional view of monogamy has a hierarchy when one person enters a romantic relationship. Neurodivergent folks often have closer friendships that are more like platonic partnerships. Patricia shares her insights on the importance of defining communication patterns and expectations in friendships. She also reflects on the challenges of permanence and attachment wounds in relationships.
 
HIGHLIGHTS
Takeaways
The traditional view of monogamy can impact friendships when one person enters a romantic relationship.
Defining communication patterns and expectations in friendships is important for maintaining connection and avoiding attachment wounds.
The challenges of permanence can affect neurodivergent individuals, leading to feelings of disconnection and uncertainty.
Embracing blended parts and honoring individual needs in relationships is essential for creating healthy and fulfilling connections.
Additional Takeaways
Understanding the dynamics of relationships through the lens of attachment theory, particularly in the context of neurodivergent individuals. Exploring the nuances of polyamory and monogamy in modern society and how they intersect with platonic partnerships. Unpacking the concept of primary and secondary relationships within the framework of monogamous norms. Delving into attachment injuries and how they can impact friendships and romantic connections. Gaining insights into navigating blended parts within relationships and the challenges they may present. Examining the shifts in relationships when one party enters a new romantic relationship, especially in the context of monogamous views. Learning about communication patterns and compatibility in friendships and partnerships, particularly in the realm of polyamory. Discovering strategies for healing attachment wounds and fostering healthier relationships, as discussed in Jessica Fern's book "Polysecure." Reflecting on the differences in communication styles between individuals and how they can affect relationship dynamics. Exploring the complexities of non-monogamous relationships and platonic partnerships in the modern world. Recognizing the importance of self-awareness and open communication in maintaining strong friendships and romantic connections. Considering the impact of societal norms on relationships and how they influence our perceptions of friendship and partnership. Embracing the diversity of relationship structures and finding resonance in the experiences shared by individuals navigating polyamory, monogamy, and platonic partnerships. Sound Bites
"Attachment wounds and the challenges of permanence in relationships"
"Polyamory and platonic partnerships"
"Feeling left behind in a friendship"
Chapters please allow for the addition of the introduction
01:50 Monogamy and Platonic Partnerships
11:48 Defining Communication Patterns
15:24 Feeling Left Behind in Friendships
23:21 Permanence and Limited Communication
26:06 Embracing Blended Parts in Relationships
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online C