WholeMan Podcast

Ccowl

WholeMan is a phoenix rising from the ashes of despair and breaking through the ceiling of normality with the belief that, first, I am worthy of being whole and secondly that one whole man can make the world a better place.

  1. The Soul's House Party with Rob Alderman (Ep 19)

    APR 26

    The Soul's House Party with Rob Alderman (Ep 19)

    Keywords: Authenticity, Fear vs Love, Purity Culture, Shame, Parenting, Consent, Strengths, Identity, Nervous System, Meditation, Religion, Sexuality, Self-Expression, Compassion, Presence Summary: Thank you from the bottom of my heart to my brother Rob “The Hound” Alderman for stepping into this conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast.I love every chance I get to spend time with my precious brother—every conversation with Rob is an exploration into identity, fear, love, and the journey back to self. We moved from a grounding “house party meditation” into conversations about childhood conditioning, religious upbringing, sexuality, and the ways fear has shaped our beliefs and behaviors. What unfolded was not just a dialogue, but a witnessing of two men remembering who they are beneath the programming. This conversation reveals the subtle and powerful ways fear disguises itself as protection—and how choosing love, presence, and authenticity becomes the path back to wholeness.  We discussed: The “house party meditation” and learning to observe thoughts and emotions without judgment Training the nervous system for presence vs. trying to “be good” at meditation Childhood experiences of comparison and the pressure to be good at everything Strengths vs. weaknesses and the power of owning your lane The impact of religious upbringing and shame-based conditioning Purity culture and fear-based sexual messaging The difference between fear-based control and love-based guidance Parenting, permission, and creating space for dialogue instead of authority The role of fear in shaping behavior—and how it often creates the very outcomes we fear Love as the most “dense” and transformative force in human experience I remembered: I don’t practice meditation to get good at it—I practice to expand my capacity for presence Nothing that arises in me is wrong—everything is welcome at the “house party” Everything is F.O.R. me (feedback, opportunity, revelation) I am not meant to be good at everything—I am meant to be fully expressed in what is mine Fear may create quick results, but it always leads to the outcomes I don’t want Love is more powerful, more truthful, and more transformative than fear My authenticity was never broken—it was conditioned, and it can be reclaimed Favorite Moment: My favorite part of this conversation was feeling held by a man so powerful that I felt safe to remember and express some of the deepest hurts and shames I’ve experienced on this Earth.  Connect to Rob Alderman: Founder & CEO of The Alderman Group (Creative Agency) https://www.robalderman.com/ IG: @robalderman Rob Alderman and the Unfortunate Return on Spotify WholeMan Links:  Podcasts: Spotify      Apple   YouTube Website: WholeMan.org  Skool: www.skool.com/wholeman Social Media: Instagram, Facebook , TikTok Email: Ccowl@wholeman.org

    2h 2m
  2. Presence Leadership with Bender "the Ender" (Ep 18)

    APR 20

    Presence Leadership with Bender "the Ender" (Ep 18)

    Keywords: Courageous Curiosity, Resistance, Leadership, Authenticity, Present Moment Awareness, Inner Work, Relationships, Emotional Growth, Brotherhood, Nervous System, Discipline to Self, Self-Trust Summary: Thank you from the bottom of my heart to Brian “Bender the Ender” for taking the time to have this incredible conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast.  The recording was actually accidental but I’m so glad. It was truly inspiring and an honor to spend time witnessing the beauty of one of my favorite human beings on the planet. Bender brings a grounded, thoughtful, and quietly powerful presence. This conversation felt like a slow burn that built into something deeply real — an exploration of resistance, leadership, relationships, and what it truly means to do the work of remembering. We discussed: – The resistance to stepping into spaces of growth and how courage and curiosity guide us through it– The vulnerability of leadership and redefining leadership outside of control, fear, and certainty– The difference between leading by example vs enforcing beliefs– How unconscious “programs” shape our behavior in relationships– The dynamic of control, expectation, and projection within intimate partnerships– The illusion of future peace vs living in present awareness– The difference between external metrics of success vs internal transformation– Why “the work” is not the practices themselves, but recognizing and moving through resistance– The role of emotional range and reconnecting with feeling beyond anger and flatness– The concept of the “dark night of the soul” as a necessary and sacred phase of growth I remembered: – Resistance is often the exact doorway into growth – Leadership does not require control — it can be collaborative, subtle, and embodied – The “programs” I run in relationships often disconnect me from the present moment – My desire to control outcomes is often rooted in fear and self-protection – The work is not practices to get good at practices — it’s practice to become aware and conscious choice of the moment – Internal metrics (presence, honesty, courage) matter more than external outcomes – Growth is not about achieving a future state — it’s about how I show up right now My favorite moment in our conversation was: When Bender said: “The work is not all the practices… it’s recognizing what you’re resisting and deciding what to do about it.” That moment hit deep. It stripped away all the noise, all the rituals, all the structure……and brought it back to something incredibly simple and powerful: Awareness.Choice.Action. Reflection: I can’t tell you what an honor it is to be able to have conversations like this with the most beautiful people on Earth. Bender was already my dear friend and brother but the moments we spent together in this conversation will forever be etched in my consciousness as precious steps toward remembering who IAM. There is something incredibly powerful about witnessing a man recognize his own growth in real time — and having the courage to say, “I’m proud of myself.” That moment alone made this conversation sacred and inspired me. Connect with Brian “Bender the Ender”: Benderbri@yahoo.com Connect with WholeMan: If you are interested in more information or connection with the WholeMan Contingent please use the links below: Podcasts: WholeMan Spotify      WholeMan Apple Podcasts WholeMan Skool Website: WholeMan.org where you can find all of the WholeMan offerings Social Media: Instagram, Facebook , TikTok Email: Ccowl@wholeman.org Sound Bites: – “The work is not all the practices… it’s recognizing what you’re resisting.”–“Resistance is often the doorway.”– “Leadership doesn’t require control-it requires presence.”

    1h 33m
  3. Masculine Gentleness with Johnny Cole (Ep 17)

    APR 11

    Masculine Gentleness with Johnny Cole (Ep 17)

    Keywords: Healthy Masculinity, Patriarchy, Emotional Expression, Father Wounds, Brotherhood, Accountability, Call-In Culture, Inner Child, Courage, Men’s Mental Health, Identity, Vulnerability Summary: Thank you from the bottom of my heart to Johnny Cole for taking the time to have this incredible conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast.  It was truly inspiring to spend time witnessing the beauty that is this incredible human being. Johnny brings a powerful presence of truth, courage, and deep emotional intelligence. This conversation felt raw, activating, and deeply necessary — an exploration of what it means to unlearn harmful conditioning, reclaim our humanity, and step into a new way of being as men. We discussed: – The impact of generational trauma and patriarchal conditioning on men and boys – Johnny’s upbringing and how it shaped his mission to redefine masculinity – The difference between respect as fear vs respect as understanding – The power of gentleness, softness, and emotional expression in men – Call-out vs call-in culture and how accountability can be rooted in love – How patriarchy harms everyone — men, women, and children – The reality of modern “manosphere” influence on young boys – The internal battle men face between authenticity and social acceptance – Moving beyond rigid masculine/feminine frameworks into wholeness – Courage in everyday environments (firehouse, friendships, culture) I learned: – Courage is not the absence of fear — it’s speaking truth while afraid – Most men are silently struggling and waiting for someone to go first – My son’s anger is not a problem — it’s a signal and an opportunity – Accountability rooted in love is one of the most powerful healing forces – Patriarchy is not just “out there” — I have participated in it– Being fully myself creates permission for other men to do the same My favorite moment in our conversation was: When Johnny reframed my fear of speaking up — not as weakness, but as the exact doorway into leadership. The realization that most men in the room are also struggling silently… just waiting for someone to go first hit me like a pillow in the face Gentle AND Disrupting. That moment felt like a shift from isolation…to responsibility…to possibility. Reflection: I can’t tell you what an honor it is to be able to have conversations like this with the most beautiful people on Earth. Johnny Cole will forever be etched in my consciousness as a brother, a truth-teller, and a man who is courageously forging a more beautiful path forward. This conversation didn’t just expand my mind —it called me forward as a man, a father, and a leader. Connect with Johnny Cole: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heybrotherjohnny Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heybrotherco TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@heybrotherjohnny YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@heybrotherco Website: www.heybrotherco.com eMail: johnny@heybrotherco.com Connect with WholeMan: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Zmk6EmhKMF64cBc77Fizr?si=-Yd7JSarR6G4GhZrgu42Xg Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wholeman-podcast/id1861302139 Website: WholeMan.org  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ccowliam/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ccowliam TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@iamwholeme Email: Ccowl@WholeMan.org Sound Bites: – “Respect doesn’t mean fear — it means understanding.” – “There are no bad emotions — only signals.” – “Most men are silently struggling… waiting for someone to go first.” – “Accountability is an act of love.” – “Patriarchy harms everyone — including men.” – “Bravery is being afraid and doing it anyway.” – “Your authenticity gives other men permission to be real.”

    1h 44m
  4. The Body Knows with Alexis Doss (Ep 16)

    APR 4

    The Body Knows with Alexis Doss (Ep 16)

    Keywords: Identity Reinvention, Nervous System Regulation, Slowing Down, Intuition vs Anxiety, Self-Relationship, Letting Go of Old Identity, Chaos vs Calm, Coaching vs Fixing, Inner Child Work, Courage & Failure Summary: Thank you from the bottom of my heart to Alexis Doss for taking the time to have this incredible conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast. It was truly inspiring and an honor to spend time witnessing the beauty that is this incredible human being. Alexis brings a powerful presence and energy that was so wonderful to interact with. This conversation felt alive, embodied, and deeply real — an exploration of what it means to slow down enough to consciously remember and recreate who we are. Alexis will forever be etched in my consciousness as a powerful force, a precious part of my journey, and a friend.  We discussed: – The power of slowing down in a world addicted to speed – How the body is often more powerful than the mind – Identity reinvention and letting go of who we thought we had to be – Why we stay stuck in patterns (chaos, victimhood, “being broke,” toxic relationships) – The difference between intuition and anxiety – The role of failure and courage in personal transformation – Moving from fixing others to supporting and witnessing – How to build a relationship with yourself that sets the standard for all others – The nervous system’s attachment to chaos and how to rewire toward calm I learned: – My body is one of the most powerful tools I have for regulation and clarity – Identity is not something to “find”— it’s something to shed and recreate – What we hold onto is often giving us something (even if it’s pain, chaos, or sympathy) – Intuition is calm and quiet — anxiety is loud and urgent – True transformation requires letting go of familiar identities, even when they hurt – I don’t need to fix others — I can witness, support, and ask better questions My favorite moment in our conversation was: Alexis continually reminded me of the power of my body. This is a huge challenge to me because I find myself always reverting to my mind. From the first exercise she lead us in to one of the last statements she made, she reminded me of the power of my body to help me solve the riddles of my existence.  If you are interested in more information or connection with the Alexis please use the links below: IG and TikTok: @thetoughlovecoach Podcast: Burn It Down  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@reinventionroom If you are interested in more information or connection with the WholeMan Contingent please use the links below: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Zmk6EmhKMF64cBc77Fizr?si=89cee5e0427649bc Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wholeman-podcast/id1861302139 Website: WholeMan.org where you can find all of the WholeMan offerings Social Media: Instagram, Facebook , TikTok Email: Ccowl@wholeman.org Sound Bites: – “The body is often more powerful than the mind.” – “You’re not stuck — you’re loyal to an old identity.” – “Intuition is calm. Anxiety is loud.” – “You don’t need to fix people — you need to witness them.” – “If chaos is your comfort zone, peace will feel wrong at first.”

    1h 21m
  5. Growing Through Fear with Brian Recker (Ep 15)

    MAR 30

    Growing Through Fear with Brian Recker (Ep 15)

    Keywords deconstruction, faith, spirituality, patriarchy, inclusion, authenticity, love, systemic oppression, mindfulness, personal growth Summary Thank you from the bottom of my heart to Brian Recker for taking time to have this incredible conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast. It was truly inspiring and an honor to spend time witnessing the beauty that is this incredible human being.  We discussed  –Deconstructing faith –Embracing authenticity –Personal stories, spiritual practices, and insights on love, inclusion, and living fully as  authentic humans. –The effect of fundamentalist Christianity on our lives –The effect of the patriarchy on not only our lives  but on the lives of the oppressors and  the oppressed  –Deconstructing faith and religious dogma –Fear and shame in spiritual life –Challenging patriarchy and systemic oppression –The true message of Jesus and living authentically I learned that patriarchy is, at it’s core, a system of hierarchy and hierarchy is always created to gain control. Holy Shit! That makes so much sense! I was challenged that one of the best ways to take up the fight to protect minority classes and people is to seek friendships with them. This is something that I have historically been afraid of because of my belief system. I’m excited to make more of an effort to seek out and befriend people of different orientations, genders, races, religions, beliefs etc etc.  My favorite part of our conversation was connecting with such a courageous force and realizing I’m not alone in so many of the thoughts, emotions, fears and experiences I’ve been through in my life..  I can’t tell you what an honor it is to be able to have conversations like this with the most beautiful people on Earth. Brian Recker will forever be a friend, a fellow traveler and a beautiful reflection of who IAM.  If you are interested in more information or connection with Brian please use the links below: For more Information about Brian: Brian’s Book Hell Bent How the Fear of Hell Holds Christians Back from a Spirituality of Love   Brian’s Substack Beloved Brian’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/berecker/ For more information about WholeMan: You can review previous conversations and podcasts here:  WholeMan Spotify      WholeMan Apple Podcasts You can see my website here: WholeMan.org You can view my social media presence here: Instagram, Facebook , TikTok

    1h 16m
  6. Introduction (Ep 1)

    MAR 13

    Introduction (Ep 1)

    Keywords mental health, suicide, meaning of life, personal struggles, emotional connection, success, fulfillment, despair, self-worth, passion Summary In this conversation Ty opens up about his profound struggles with life, expressing feelings of despair and contemplating suicide. He reflects on his relentless pursuit of success and fulfillment, only to find himself feeling disconnected and unfulfilled despite his efforts. The discussion delves into the emotional turmoil of feeling unloved and lacking passion, highlighting the importance of connection and self-worth in the journey of life. Takeaways Tyler experienced a deep sense of despair and contemplated suicide.He felt that despite his efforts, he was not achieving the desires of his heart.The feeling of being unloved contributed to his struggles.Tyler's relentless pursuit of success left him feeling empty.He questioned the purpose of his existence during his darkest moments.The conversation emphasizes the importance of emotional connection.Tyler's journey reflects a common struggle with mental health.He highlights the need for self-worth and fulfillment in life.The discussion sheds light on the impact of feeling disconnected from oneself.Tyler's story serves as a reminder of the importance of seeking help and connection."I wanted to die.""I don't feel loved.""I don't feel powerful." Sound Bites Chapters 00:00Introduction to the Whole Man Podcast 00:13Overcoming Darkness and Finding Purpose 00:40Transforming Challenges into Growth

    21 min
  7. Desire with Kianga Ford (Ep14)

    MAR 6

    Desire with Kianga Ford (Ep14)

    Thank you from the bottom of my heart to my precious friend Kianga Ford for taking time to have this incredible conversation with me on the WholeMan Podcast. It was truly inspiring and an honor to spend time witnessing the beauty that is this incredible human being. For many reasons Kianga is a precious part of my story, not least of which is that she was my first guest on the podcast. We discussed desire, masculine feminine relating, the beast inside every man, different perspective on truth, and personal experiences. I cried multiple times in our conversation which is a testament to the beauty and calm and protection Kianga brings wherever she goes.  I learned so much from Kianga in this conversation including getting challenged on my hyper masculine perspective of truth, the gift of honesty, a deepening perspective of what personal honesty really is, a new perspective and analogy for the beast inside of me, and much much more.  My favorite moment in our conversation was getting to recount an interaction Kianga and I had where she brought such powerful, gentle feminine fire that it reminded me of the value I bring to the world and to the feminine beings I interact with.  I can’t tell you what an honor it is to be able to have conversations like this with the most beautiful people on Earth. Kianga will forever be etched in my consciousness as a friend, a fellow traveler and a precious part of my experience on this Earth.  If you are interested in more information or connection with Kianga please use the links below: kiangaford@gmail.com Keywords Whole Man Podcast, Kianga Ford, desire, masculinity, femininity, personal growth, relationships, emotional intelligence, self-discovery, vulnerability Summary In this episode of the Whole Man Podcast, host Cowell engages in a deep and intimate conversation with Kianga Ford, exploring themes of desire, masculinity, femininity, and personal growth. They discuss the importance of understanding one's desires, the dynamics of relationships, and the journey of self-discovery. The conversation emphasizes the need for vulnerability and honesty in relationships, as well as the significance of grounding exercises in connecting with oneself and others. Kianga shares insights on the feminine aspect of desire and its role in personal and relational development, while Cowell reflects on his own experiences and growth. The episode concludes with recommendations for resources and a challenge to listeners to explore their own limitations and possibilities. Takeaways Desire is a core aspect of the feminine energy. Understanding one's desires is crucial for personal growth. The foreclosure of desire can lead to unhealthy behaviors. Vulnerability and honesty are essential in relationships. Men and women have distinct but complementary roles in relationships. Self-discovery is a continuous journey that requires inquiry. Grounding exercises can enhance connection and presence. The dynamics of masculinity and femininity are evolving. Personal responsibility is key to emotional well-being. Exploring limitations can lead to new possibilities. Titles Unlocking Desire: A Journey of Self-Discovery The Dance of Masculinity and Femininity Sound Bites "I am here. I am now." "What do you desire?" "Go through the limitations into the possibilities." Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Grounding Exercise 10:06 Exploring Desire and Its Importance 20:02 The Role of Masculinity and Femininity 29:47 Navigating Relationships and Personal Growth 40:01 Resources and Final Thoughts

    1h 38m

About

WholeMan is a phoenix rising from the ashes of despair and breaking through the ceiling of normality with the belief that, first, I am worthy of being whole and secondly that one whole man can make the world a better place.