You Can Adopt You Can Adopt

Welcome to episode 23 of the You Can Adopt podcast.

Debbie Bright, mum of four, has fostered over 200 children over the last 30 years. She has looked after children of all ages, with a variety of needs, and for variable periods of time. Her and her husband, Dave, did this while raising their birth children Lydia, Georgia, Romana and Freddie.

Lydia Bright, TV personality, influencer, author and mother, was two years old when her parents began fostering. From then, she has had many siblings come into her life, but has never known any different.

In this episode, mum and daughter Debbie and Lydia explore what it is like to bring an adopted and/or fostered child into a family with birth children. There are understandably a lot of questions prospective adopters will have when considering welcoming a new family member, many of which may revolve around what impact it may have on their birth children.

By shining a light on their experiences, it aims to encourage parents with birth children to consider adoption, by showing a balanced picture of what it is like to grow your family through adoption, and the benefits it can bring to the whole family.

If you are considering adopting a child, the adopted child must be at least two years younger than your youngest birth child at the time of adoption.

Welcome to episode 22 of the You Can Adopt podcast.

In this episode, TV presenter, culture expert and adopted person Nick Ede speaks to Samantha, who is part of three generations of adopted people. As a special episode for National Adoption Week, the episode explores how adoption has changed through the decades, through the voices of two people who have seen or heard first-hand how it has evolved.

In the episode, both Nick and Samantha explore their experiences of being adopted, including topics around identity, openness and contact with birth families – to shine a light on how the sector is transforming and the importance of a connection to your history in developing a sense of who you are.

While historically adoption was often seen as secretive and hidden, with little information and support provided to help adopted people understand their history, it is now vital that adoptees have a good understanding of their history to help form a positive sense of identity. This includes staying in touch with birth relatives and friends (when safe and appropriate), and maintaining these connections through life story books, later life letters, and memory boxes, which all help adopted people stay connected to their past.

Welcome to episode 21 of the You Can Adopt podcast, hosted by actor Jimmy Akingbola.

In his 2022 ITV documentary ‘Handle with Care’, Jimmy explores his journey through the care system, and his experience of being fostered long-term by a white British family – particularly around themes of identity, the importance of role models, and cultural connection.

In this episode, Jimmy speaks to Sarah Livingstone, a foster carer and chair of the Camden Association for Foster Carers. She has played an instrumental role in many policy changes, including the creation and distribution of Replenish Boxes alongside her colleague James Kargbo – which were created to ensure that Black children will be able to access the right products for their hair and skin. They also offer training workshops around identity and culture.

Adopters are in greatest demand for brother and sister groups, older children, children with additional and/or complex needs and children from Black and mixed heritage backgrounds. Children from these groups represent 59% of all children waiting to be adopted. Black children wait on average two months longer to be adopted.

Jimmy and Sarah openly discuss their own experiences of adoption and long term foster care. They particularly focus on Black and mixed-heritage children in the care system, the support those children need and encourage more people from the Black community to consider adoption.

Links:
https://www.instagram.com/replenish_culture/

Welcome to Episode 20 of the You Can Adopt podcast, hosted by former children’s social worker and Love Island winner, Sanam Harrinanan.

In this episode, Sanam speaks to Emma, who adopted two children with her husband, to explore the theme of the support available to adopters.

There are a variety of support services available to adopters throughout their journey, from therapeutic and financial support for children with disabilities, to ongoing peer support through workshops, family days out and training sessions. 

Emma and her husband adopted two children, and their son has required some additional support along the way. Working with their adoption agency and local authority, they have been able to access a variety of means of support, including financial and therapeutic.

Adopters are in greatest demand for brother and sister groups, older children, children with additional and/or complex needs and children from Black and mixed heritage backgrounds. Children from these groups represent 59% of all children waiting to be adopted.  

In this episode, Sanam and Emma explore that while some of these groups of children may bring additional challenges to a new family, the power of family and a permanent home can be transformational for these children, and there is support available.

Emma mentioned a few books that helped her along the way:

Sarah Nash - But he looks so normal
Sarah Nash - Therapeutic Parenting strategies and solutions
Sarah Nash - Therapeutic Parenting essentials
Louise Bomber - Inside I'm hurting practical strategies for supporting children with attachment difficulties in school
Louise Bomber - What about me? Inclusive strategies to support pupils with attachments difficulties in school
Mindfulness - A practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world - Mark Williams
Psychologies magazine subsciption

To find out more, visit www.youcanadopt.co.uk

Welcome to episode 19 of the You Can Adopt podcast, hosted by radio DJ Pandora Christie, who speaks to guest Jonny about his experience of adopting through early permanence.

Early permanence refers to the situation where children in care are placed in a permanent family home at the earliest opportunity to prevent additional moves between carers. A child would be placed into care with carers who are initially approved as foster carers but who also have the potential to be their adopters. The ‘usual’ adoption route can take 6-12 months or longer, with children moving between one or more placements. With early permanence, children can spend their time waiting with the family planning to adopt them.

Early permanence is totally child centred practice, with the adults managing the uncertainty and not the child. There are two main routes to early permanence; concurrent planning and fostering to adopt. The main difference is the status and preparation of the carers. Concurrent carers will be approved as foster carers and adopters, and are more prepared for the possible return home of the child placed with them. Fostering for adoption carers are primarily adopters that are temporarily approved as foster carers for a specific child.

Given Pandora’s own experience of being fostered, and Johnny’s experience of fostering and then adopting a child, this episode explores both their experiences, with a particular focus on the benefits for the child.

To find out more, visit www.youcanadopt.co.uk

Welcome to episode 18 of the You Can Adopt podcast, hosted by actor and activist Charlie Condou, who speaks to couple Adam and Daniyal, who adopted their son, about adopting as a same sex couple. They discuss being LGBTQ+ parents, the process of adoption, the support they received along the way, and how they came to adopt.
 
Charlie Condou, ex Coronation Street actor and LGBTQ+ activist, shares two children with his partner and their friend, who acted as a surrogate and co-parents their children. While he did not go down the adoption route, he is passionate about encouraging gay parenting and is an advocate for adoption.
 
Adam is from Middlesbrough, and his husband, Daniyal, grew up in Dubai - but they both now live near Newcastle together. They met working in a hospital, fell in love and got married- and later began thinking about having children. After beginning the adoption process, they were quickly matched with a child. They adopted their little boy at 10 months old, and he is almost three. He was born on the eve of the first Covid lockdown, and then in care for 10 months before he came to them. When adopting, they didn’t have any specific preferences about gender or heritage, but just wanted a child to love and give a safe home. Their little boy is from a mixed white and South Asian background- and people always tell them he looks like both his papa and his daddy. Since becoming part of their family, they say their lives have been turned upside down in the best way- he is cheeky, loves to roll his eyes and cause havoc!
 
To find out more, visit www.youcanadopt.co.uk
 
PAC-UK is the country’s largest independent adoption support agency and works with all of those affected by adoption and other forms of permanent care to provide advice, support, specialist therapy and counselling. For more information please visit: www.PAC-UK.org or call 020 7284 5879