The Attachment Confessions

Chelsea S.

From FA to Secure AF: How Attachment Science Changed My Life...For Real. From the moment I discovered attachment science, everything – literally EV-ERY-THING – about every relationship I'd ever been in finally made sense. And now, I'm learning what it takes to earn my attachment security and have awesome, healthy relationships moving forward. We'll dive into the mind-blowing and freakishly accurate world of attachment science, my childhood, my relationships, and my journey of going from FA to secure AF (iykyk – and if you don't know, don't worry! You will soon). Throughout The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my own attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty heavy stuff but have a grand 'ol time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey. That's my hope, at least! Whether you're an Anxious Preoccupied, a Dismissive Avoidant, a Fearful Avoidant, OR the holy grail of them all – Securely Attached – all are welcome! Let's freaking go, y'all! xo – Chelsea

  1. 17/12/2025

    Love Bombing 101: How to Evacuate Before Things Blow Up

    Hello confessions fam!! Welcome back to The Attachment Confessions! On today's episode, we're diving into a topic that has been all the rage on social media in the dating world, especially over the last few years – love bombing. Not gonna lie you guys, just the mention of that term gives me full-on body chills. In the worst way! Love bombing is essentially bombarding a new romantic interest with over-the-top attention, affection, compliments, and the extravagant, finer things in life very early on in the getting-to-know-someone phase. I've been love-bombed a time or two, and let me tell you, it can feel absolutely amazing! For those of us with an insecure attachment, that is (healing Fearful Avoidant talking). However, love bombing is not a true testament of someone's motives, character, or {realistic} true feelings. In fact, there are two types of love bombing to be aware of – narcissistic-driven and attachment-driven. In today's episode, we'll break down each type along with some helpful tips on how to appropriately spot and handle a love bomber in action.  Whether you're an Anxious Preoccupied, a Dismissive Avoidant, a fellow Fearful Avoidant, or Securely Attached – this week's episode is sure to set you up for success next time you feel premature love grenades coming your way. Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing adventure. My hope is by bringing attachment science to those of you who have never heard of it before and by sharing my own story,  you'll also be inspired to embark on your own attachment healing journey. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea

    25 min
  2. 26/11/2025

    Dismissive Avoidant Guest Lived Experience Feat. Brent Stokes [Part 2]

    Happy Wednesday, everyone! Welcome back to The Attachment Confessions! Today's episode features part 2 of our conversation with Brent Stokes – our very first lived-experience Dismissive Avoidant guest. Last week, Brent took us on a journey through his childhood, highlighting how his dismissive avoidant insecure attachment formed.  On today's episode, we are continuing the convo, diving into Brent's romantic history and getting a peek behind the curtain of how his DA tendencies played out in his marriage.  We also chat through where Brent is now in his journey, now that he's discovered attachment science thanks to listening to The Attachment Confessions ;) One of the resources we discuss is social psychologist/attachment expert Dr. Sarah Hensley's 4-week hybrid group coaching, which I am in the middle of participating in, learning all the tools to earn my attachment security. Check out all of Dr. Hensley's services here: The Love Doc | Relationship Coaching Services HUGE shout out to Brent for being so awesome and open about his attachment journey!! If you'd like to be considered for a future Guest Lived Experience episode, DM me on Instagram at The Attachment Confessions (especially if you're an Anxious Preoccupied!) Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing adventure. We'll get into some pretty deep topics but have ourselves a good 'ol time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey – just like Brent. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea

    41 min
  3. 19/11/2025

    Dismissive Avoidant Guest Lived Experience Feat. Brent Stokes [Part 1]

    What's up, everybody! Welcome back to The Attachment Confessions! On today's episode, I'm SUPER pumped to introduce you guys to a brand-new series we'll be doing from time to time here on The Attachment Confessions – Guest Lived Experiences!  My confessions fam knows my Fearful Avoidant woes all too well, so I figured we should spice things up and have other peeps from different walks of life and across all ends of the attachment spectrum join the pod to give us an insider's view of what it's like to walk a mile in their insecurely-attached shoes. Our very first lived-experience guest is Brent Stokes – a Dismissive Avoidant. For part 1, Brent takes us all on a trip down memory lane, highlighting how his dismissive avoidant insecure attachment formed in childhood. Be sure to tune-in next Wednesday for part 2, where Brent will give us the deets on how his formed DA attachment went on to impact his romantic relationships, and how he's now in the process of figuring out how to earn his attachment security. Both episodes are sure to bring a whole new perspective to The Attachment Confessions, so I can't wait for you guys to listen! Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty deep topics but have ourselves a good time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey – just like Brent. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea P.S. – Be sure to follow the pod on Instagram @theattachmentconfessions and DM me your burning attachment-related questions so that your question can be featured/answered on an upcoming Q&A episode of The Attachment Confessions!

    32 min
  4. 12/11/2025

    The Narcissist / Codependent Toxic Relationship Dynamic

    What's up, everyone! Welcome to The Attachment Confessions! We've made it to episode 10 – double digits, baby! Today we are taking our previous discussion on narcissism a step further and examining the most painful duo that exists – the narcissist / codependent toxic relationship dynamic.  From an attachment lens, the codependent partner subconsciously enters relationships with their anxious attachment in the driver's seat, leaving them totally vulnerable to the charm, manipulation, and control of the narcissist. Whether they are an Anxious Preoccupied or a Fearful Avoidant that leans anxious, the pairing of the codependent with the narcissist proves to be the perfect storm and unfortunately, is all too common.  In this episode, we'll do a deep dive into the many reasons why these two tend to gravitate toward each other, the behaviors that each bring to the relationship, and the destruction that inevitably ensues. In true Attachment Confessions fashion, you'll get a closer glimpse behind the curtain of my toxic covert narcissist relationship. It was hell, but by the grace of God, I made it through to the other side. If you find yourself in a similar situation where you feel there is no escape, listen up. You, too, can break free from the agonizing narcissistic stronghold. Check out attachment expert Dr. Sarah Hensley's hybrid group coaching services if you're serious about breaking your painful relationship patterns and healing your attachment, just like I am! The Love Doc Hybrid Group Coaching Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty heavy topics but have ourselves a good time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea P.S. – Be sure to follow the pod on Instagram @theattachmentconfessions and DM me your burning attachment-related questions so that your question can be featured/answered on an upcoming Q&A episode of The Attachment Confessions!

    35 min
  5. 05/11/2025

    Attachment vs Narcissism

    Hey Hey, everybody! Welcome to episode 9 of The Attachment Confessions! On today’s episode, we're doing a deep dive into a topic that a number of you have asked me about – narcissists. Particularly, where does narcissism fall on the attachment spectrum? When it comes to how the two of these coincide, there actually is no correlation at all whatsoever. Narcissism is a highly complex psychological construct that can wreak havoc in all areas of someone’s life that struggles with this issue, especially in their romantic relationships.  We'll be chatting through the differences between attachment science and narcissism, digging into the varying levels of narcissism, and going over the different types of narcissism. The science shows that whether you are an Anxious Preoccupied, a Dismissive Avoidant, a Fearful Avoidant, or a Securely Attached individual – narcissism is a totally different psychological construct than attachment.  After having experienced many years of abuse from a covert narcissist myself that I am now SO thankful to refer to as my ex, I'm here to lay out all the signs of narcissism for you guys, so that you can hopefully spot a narcissist quicker than I was able to. Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty disturbing topics from time to time. But – opening our eyes and seeing things for what they truly are can often be the catalyst we need to experience peace in our lives. And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey and finally break free from anyone in your life that doesn't deserve to be in your orbit. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea P.S. – Be sure to follow the pod on Instagram @theattachmentconfessions and DM me your burning attachment-related questions, so that your question can be featured/answered on an upcoming Q&A episode of The Attachment Confessions!

    25 min
  6. 29/10/2025

    Break Up or Make Up: How To Know If Things Are Salvageable

    What’s up, everybody! Welcome to EPISODE 8 of The Attachment Confessions!! Guys – We’ve hit a milestone making it this far. Fun fact – 90% of podcasts don’t make it past episode 7, which is B-A-N-A-N-A-S. But here we are, episode 8 baby! Thank you so much for giving me space in your life and joining me on this attachment healing adventure! It seriously means the world *insert joyful teary-eyed emoji* On today’s episode, we are wrapping up our 3-part breakup series by examining when a relationship that’s gone splitsville is salvageable versus ending things for good. We’ll dive into the most common reasons why couples call it quits, chat through which circumstances are definite deal-breakers vs which love stories stand a chance of being revived, and finish things by going over some solid advice from attachment expert Thais Gibson on how to approach your ex if getting back together is on your wish list.  For the sagas that are worth saving – understanding both your and your partner’s attachment styles can make all the difference in the world of setting your relationship re-do up for success.  Whether you’re an Anxious Preoccupied, a Dismissive Avoidant, a Fearful Avoidant, or Securely Attached – knowing when to keep trying or when to throw in the towel forever can be a confusing time in anyone’s love life. Having a better understanding of what is and is not worth fighting for can help give both partners the clarity needed to make the best decision – to continue or not to continue.  Here on The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty intense topics but have ourselves a good time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey and finally have the tools needed to experience break-up or make-up clarity in your love life. That's my hope, at least!   xo - Chelsea P.S. – Be sure to follow the pod on Instagram @theattachmentconfessions and DM me your burning attachment-related questions so that your question can be featured/answered on an upcoming Q&A episode of The Attachment Confessions!

    33 min

About

From FA to Secure AF: How Attachment Science Changed My Life...For Real. From the moment I discovered attachment science, everything – literally EV-ERY-THING – about every relationship I'd ever been in finally made sense. And now, I'm learning what it takes to earn my attachment security and have awesome, healthy relationships moving forward. We'll dive into the mind-blowing and freakishly accurate world of attachment science, my childhood, my relationships, and my journey of going from FA to secure AF (iykyk – and if you don't know, don't worry! You will soon). Throughout The Attachment Confessions, you'll have a ring-side seat to my own attachment healing journey. We'll get into some pretty heavy stuff but have a grand 'ol time while doing so! And who knows, maybe you'll be inspired to ALSO embark on your own attachment healing journey. That's my hope, at least! Whether you're an Anxious Preoccupied, a Dismissive Avoidant, a Fearful Avoidant, OR the holy grail of them all – Securely Attached – all are welcome! Let's freaking go, y'all! xo – Chelsea

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