Outwitting the Manipulator

Dr. Dennis Becker & Robin Golinski
  • 5.0 (4)
  • Business
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to Outwitting the Manipulator, the podcast that gives you powerful techniques to protect yourself as manipulation is taking place. Your hosts are authors and communication experts Robin Golinski and Dr. Dennis Becker. You can find the book, Outwitting the Manipulator, on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Outwitting-Manipulator-Protecting-Yourself-Real-Time/dp/1953806244 Our main website: https://www.outwitinrealtime.com/ Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/outwitting-the-manipulator/id1644706232 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4peb6yxqyrYQllAo8c6KTE?si=NbBsepYzSc-FWrwOjHAuCA To get your copy of Robin and Dennis's on-Demand Training Course made up of eight video modules, practice worksheets and more, go to www.manipulator.help and use the password FREEDOM to get 25% off. In their friendly and expert style, Robin and Dennis will help strengthen your ability to defend yourself from manipulation as it is happening.

  1. 5 days ago

    Robin and Dennis Talk Manipulation with Divorce Attorney Evan Schein

    This episode features Robin and Dennis’s appearance on the Schein On podcast. Host Evan Schein interviews them about their 2021 book, Outwitting the Manipulator: Protecting Yourself in Real Time, which identifies 24 common manipulation tactics and focuses on defending yourself while manipulation is happening. Robin shares that the book was inspired by her own experience being manipulated and emphasizes having enough distance to teach others. Robin and Dennis discuss how difficulty detecting tactics depends on context, how gender dynamics can affect targeting, and why smart, trusting people are prime targets. Key strategies include building awareness, journaling to spot patterns, staying neutral, staying curious, and asking questions to disrupt a manipulator’s momentum. They address workplace manipulation (especially public humiliation), high-conflict divorce and co-parenting, and red flags like charisma and heroic self-framing. They react to quotes about blame, believing behavior, and guilt.   You can find the book, Outwitting the Manipulator, on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Outwitting-Manipulator-Protecting-Yourself-Real-Time/dp/1953806244 Robin/Dennis website: https://www.outwitinrealtime.com/ Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/outwitting-the-manipulator/id1644706232 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4peb6yxqyrYQllAo8c6KTE?si=NbBsepYzSc-FWrwOjHAuCA To get your copy of Robin and Dennis's on-Demand Training Course made up of eight video modules, practice worksheets and more, go to www.manipulator.help and use the password FREEDOM to get 25% off. In their friendly and expert style, Robin and Dennis will help strengthen your ability to defend yourself from manipulation as it is happening.   The Schein On podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/schein-on/id1541360422   Topics 00:49 Why Write This Book 02:18 Real Time Defense 03:20 Hardest Tactics Spot 04:29 Gender and Manipulation 05:55 Awareness Comes First 07:08 Smart People Targeted 07:57 Politeness as Weapon 09:16 Manipulation vs Persuasion 11:46 Do Manipulators Know 14:27 Workplace Power Plays 15:41 Mastering Neutrality 18:08 Curiosity and Patterns 19:23 Divorce Conflict Tactics 20:29 Co Parenting With Manipulator 23:13 Spotting Litigation Manipulation 24:52 Gender Patterns In Control 25:40 When The Manipulator Hires You 26:43 Courtroom Audience Shift 28:44 Red Flags For Professionals 32:28 Curiosity Courage Questions 34:39 They Said It Quotes Game 40:42 Final Takeaways And Thanks

  2. 16 July

    Grey Rock Is a Technique. Outwitting Is the Strategy.

    Grey Rock may protect you for a moment—but it won't change the game. Robin Golinski and Dr. Dennis Becker explain why lasting protection comes from understanding manipulation rather than simply avoiding it. They reveal the crucial difference between tactics and strategy, how manipulators deliberately condition targets to comply, and why recognizing predictable patterns allows you to respond strategically in real time. The ultimate goal isn't just surviving manipulative encounters—it's becoming someone manipulators recognize as too difficult to control. The goal isn't to avoid manipulators. The goal is to outwit them.

  3. 8 July

    Outwitting the Manipulator: How One Woman Took Back Her Power Without Fighting

    This episode goes beyond tactics to the deeper work of healing. Michelle shares how her greatest victory wasn't changing her manipulative ex—it was changing herself. By learning to outwit rather than fight, she rebuilt her confidence, escaped the constant fight-or-flight response, and reclaimed her peace. Robin and Dennis explain why the goal is never to change the manipulator, but to understand their psychology and communicate strategically. Michelle also offers a powerful reminder: seeking the right coaching early can save years of emotional turmoil—and thousands of dollars in unnecessary legal battles.

  4. 22 June

    The Trust Trap: How Manipulators Win You Over Before They Use You

    In this episode of Outwitting the Manipulator, Robin Golinski and Dr. Dennis Becker explore one of the most painful costs of manipulation: the erosion of trust — not only in others, but in yourself. They explain how manipulators often build trust quickly through charm, attention, false vulnerability, and perfectly timed support, especially when you are already vulnerable. The episode offers practical ways to slow down the trust-building process, notice when someone’s actions do not align with their words, write down odd patterns, and protect yourself before disclosing personal information that could later be used against you.

  5. 15 June

    The Shame Trap: How Manipulators Use Your Deepest Insecurities Against You

    In this powerful episode of the Outwitting the Manipulator podcast, Robin Golinski and Dennis Becker explore how manipulators weaponize shame to control, silence, and destabilize others. They unpack the difference between shame and guilt, explain why shame is such a deeply rooted emotional trigger, and reveal how manipulators exploit personal insecurities, public embarrassment, and over-explaining to gain power. Through real-world examples and role-play scenarios, they teach listeners how to recognize these tactics in the moment and respond strategically with calm, concise communication instead of emotional defensiveness.   Visit https://www.outwitinrealtime.com/   Topics 00:00 Shame Meets Manipulation 01:43 How Shame Forms Early 04:45 Shame Versus Guilt 06:23 Shame As Leverage 09:17 Everyday Shame Triggers 14:03 Spot It In Real Time 16:52 When Shame Is Misread 17:58 Responses That Disarm 20:40 Stop Apologizing 20:59 Explanation Trap 21:54 Manipulator Roleplay 23:40 Excuse Versus Explain 25:43 Less Is More 26:26 Short Sweet Response 29:35 Tone And Delivery 31:55 Shame Inventory 35:04 Closing And Resources

  6. 28 Apr

    The Hidden Cost of Being Liked

    This episode reveals how good intentions—like being liked or avoiding conflict—can make you vulnerable to manipulation. While most people act with positive motives, manipulators have one consistent goal: control. Seemingly helpful behaviors are often read as compliance, prompting manipulators to test and push boundaries further. The more you prioritize harmony, the more you risk being taken advantage of. The key shift: stop aiming to be liked and start aiming to be strong. Clear boundaries may feel uncomfortable, but they prevent manipulation and build real respect.   Topics 01:59 Why Intentions Matter 02:53 Targets Seeking Harmony 03:49 Manipulator Intent Control 06:40 Inventory Your Intentions 08:28 When Normal Tactics Fail 12:34 Coffee Favor as a Test 16:38 Workload Trap and Red Flags 18:05 New Client Airport Ride 18:26 Testing the Ride Ask 19:16 Stacking Extra Favors 20:38 Captive in the Car 20:55 Harmony vs Strength 22:08 Holding the Line 24:40 Courage to Set Boundaries 25:53 Confidence They Can Sense 27:50 Strong Yet Still Targeted 29:41 Know Your Vulnerabilities 31:26 Stop Trying to Be Liked 33:02 Final Takeaways and Next Steps

  7. 23 Mar

    Who’s Controlling Your Attention?

    In this episode of Outwitting the Manipulator, Dr. Dennis Becker and Robin Golinski pull back the curtain on something most people miss entirely: The quiet ways your attention gets pulled—and why it matters more than anything being said. Through sharp insights and real-life moments, they reveal how quickly conversations can shift when your focus is redirected—and how that shift can change your decisions without you realizing it. If you’ve ever walked away from an interaction wondering, “How did that just happen?”—this episode will connect the dots. 👉 Because once you understand the role of attention, you start seeing the entire game differently. You can find the book, Outwitting the Manipulator, on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Outwitting-Manipulator-Protecting-Yourself-Real-Time/dp/1953806244 Our main website: https://www.outwitinrealtime.com/ Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/outwitting-the-manipulator/id1644706232 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4peb6yxqyrYQllAo8c6KTE?si=NbBsepYzSc-FWrwOjHAuCA To get your copy of Robin and Dennis's on-Demand Training Course made up of eight video modules, practice worksheets and more, go to www.manipulator.help and use the password FREEDOM to get 25% off. In their friendly and expert style, Robin and Dennis will help strengthen your ability to defend yourself from manipulation as it is happening.   Topics 01:29 Attention as a Commodity 04:56 Awareness and Metacognition 05:49 How Manipulators Steal Focus 08:11 Awareness Versus Focus 12:50 Distraction and Charm Tactics 16:58 Urgency Trap Example 21:51 Responding Under Pressure 24:02 Practical Rules to Practice 26:06 Resources and Closing

  8. 25 Feb

    The Gold Medal Apology: When “I’m Sorry” Becomes a Weapon

    A gold-medal moment turns into something way more personal: a Norwegian Olympian uses his post-win interview to deliver a tearful public apology to the girlfriend he cheated on—on a worldwide stage. Robin and Dr. Dennis Becker break down why this kind of “public remorse” can be more than heartfelt… it can be a high-powered influence move that quietly recruits everyone watching. They debate two competing interpretations (sincere regret vs. strategic pressure), unpack what manipulation can look like in real time, and land on a simple mindset listeners can use anywhere: get curious, question the story, and have the courage to challenge what doesn’t feel right. Topics 00:56 Olympics Apology Setup 03:33 Surrogate Pressure Explained 04:39 Sincere or Strategic 06:17 Winner Mindset and Rejection 08:52 Shame and Double Standards 10:26 Multiple Manipulation Tactics 12:52 Tears Switch On and Off 13:29 Could She Be the Manipulator 14:38 Norway Privacy Culture 15:37 Heated Culture Debate 16:56 Manipulation But Motives 18:15 Timing And Credibility 19:54 Staged For Publicity 20:53 Think Deeper Not Surface 23:10 Three Rules Against Manipulation 25:04 Wrap Up And Call To Action

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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
4 Ratings

About

Welcome to Outwitting the Manipulator, the podcast that gives you powerful techniques to protect yourself as manipulation is taking place. Your hosts are authors and communication experts Robin Golinski and Dr. Dennis Becker. You can find the book, Outwitting the Manipulator, on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Outwitting-Manipulator-Protecting-Yourself-Real-Time/dp/1953806244 Our main website: https://www.outwitinrealtime.com/ Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/outwitting-the-manipulator/id1644706232 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4peb6yxqyrYQllAo8c6KTE?si=NbBsepYzSc-FWrwOjHAuCA To get your copy of Robin and Dennis's on-Demand Training Course made up of eight video modules, practice worksheets and more, go to www.manipulator.help and use the password FREEDOM to get 25% off. In their friendly and expert style, Robin and Dennis will help strengthen your ability to defend yourself from manipulation as it is happening.

Information

  • Creator
    Dr. Dennis Becker & Robin Golinski
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    82
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2022 pod617 - The Boston Podcast Network, All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    Outwitting the Manipulator

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