The Developmental Alis Anagnostakis (Ph.D.)

In this emotional conversation, I sit down with my dear friend, Belinda Forman, who shares her profound journey with cancer, not just as a battle to be fought, but as a deeply personal developmental journey. Belinda opens up about the initial shock of diagnosis, the rollercoaster of choices around treatments, and the unexpected pathways to personal growth that emerged from her experience.
Through her story she invites us into a vulnerable exploration of the intersection of health crises and adult development, shedding light on the power of mindset, the importance of facing our mortality, and showing us how we might choose to lean into adversity as a gift of transformative growth. I hope you are as inspired as I was by Belinda’s insights into navigating one of life's toughest challenges with grace, ‘fire’, awareness, resilience, and an open heart, and that you find in this conversation some precious wisdom to bring into your own relationship with adversity.
Episode summary
* [00:00:00] Kicking off with a deep dive into growing through health challenges.
* [00:03:11] Belinda opens up about her cancer journey and finding growth amidst adversity.
* [00:09:58] She touches on the raw deal of facing mortality and the growth it spurred.
* [00:12:18] Talks about how her views on control and acceptance were turned upside down.
* [00:18:14] Highlights how a positive mindset and seeing cancer as part of her story helped her heal.
* [00:35:01] Belinda reflects on the continuous journey of self-discovery and supporting oneself post-crisis.
Useful Resources
* Belinda’s LinkedIn profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/belindaforman/
* The meditation Belinda mentions she has found hepful and healing:
* Insight timer - another great app for meditation Belinda recommends: https://insig.ht/j0c3vaJoNGb
* Bowel cancer AU - www.bowelcanceraustralia.org
* Learn more about colon cancer: Coloncancerfoundation.org
Guest Bio: Belinda Forman
Belinda Forman is a seasoned People and Culture professional with a diverse background in coaching, L&D, team experience, and culture development. Based on the Sunshine Coast in Australia, Belinda has a passion for helping individuals connect with their purpose and values, empowering them to lead more powerful and fulfilling lives.
Belinda and her husband Matt have spent the last 15 years building and growing business in the tech space. Creating environments where individuals thrive both personally and professionally.
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In this episode we dive into the rollercoaster of emotions and how they secretly power our lives. I’m thrilled to learn from Dr. Cindy Sholes, a neuroscientist, coach and co-founder of the rREST™ technique, as we explore "Emotions as Superpowers."
In this chat, Cindy takes us on her personal journey, from the foundational experiences of her early years to her research into neuroscience and her journey into the heart of human emotion. She sheds light on the mysteries of emotional agility and introduces us to the rREST technique – her unique approach to taming emotional stress. We'll explore how our feelings are not just fleeting reactions, but powerful guides that shape who we are and how we navigate the world - how we parent, engage with our life-partners and show up for others (and ourselves) every day.
So, grab a cozy spot and join us for a conversation that I hope will be as enlightening as it is heartwarming. We're not just talking about emotions – we're aiming to discover how they can be our greatest superpowers in this crazy, beautiful and yet often overwhelming journey of life.
Episode summary
[00:02:33] Dr. Cindy shares her neuroscience background and personal experiences.
[00:06:08] Journey from neuroscience to studying emotions and the subconscious.
[00:09:51] Discussion on emotional triggers and the importance of emotional understanding.
[00:17:20] Explanation of emotional agility in adult development.
[00:23:35] Introduction to the rRest technique for managing emotional stress.
[00:33:15] Four reflective questions for better emotional understanding.
[00:41:21] How emotions manifest physically and impact behavior.
[00:51:14] Curiosity as an effective tool for soothing emotions.
[00:56:49] Importance of practice and awareness in emotional regulation.
[00:59:44] Dr. Cindy's vision for emotional mastery and authentic self-expression.
[01:02:31] Summary of key insights and the role of curiosity in emotional growth.
Useful Resources
* Cindy’s website: https://www.drcindysholes.com
* Learn more about the rREST™ method: https://rrestacademy.com
* Shirzad Chamine’s work on Positive Intelligence (saboteurs/sage): www.PositiveIntelligence.com
* The Emotional Guidance Scale source: the book "Ask and It is Given" by Ester and Jerry Hicks. 
* Dr. Brene Brown’s work on Emotions: the book “Atlas of the Heart”
* Dr. Valerie Livesay’s work on Fallback: https://www.ghostlightleadership.com and the podcast I recorded with Valerie on this topic:
* The Bodily Maps of Emotions research study: Nummenmaa L, Glerean E, Hari R, Hietanen JK. Bodily maps of emotions. Proc Natl Acad Sci U S A. 2014 Jan 14;111(2):646-51. doi: 10.1073/pnas.1321664111. Epub 2013 Dec 30. PMID: 24379370; PMCID: PMC3896150.
* The Contrasting Emotions Theory by Dr. Alis Anagnostakis: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/363432753_Fostering_Conscious_Leadership_Exploring_Leaders'_Experience_of_Vertical_Development_during_an_Executive_Leadership_Program
Guest Bio:
Cynthia (Cindy) Sholes, PhD
Dr. Cindy has dedicated her life to supporting people who want to make a difference in the world by guiding them off of the burnout path dictated by society onto the purpose path assigned to them by their soul.
Trained by Nobel Prize winners at UCSF, a prestigious medical school, Dr Cindy is a neuroscientist, who uses a little bit of magic to guide people to access their personal power and transform their future.  She is the innovator and co-founder of rREST Inc. and was featured in the Wall Street Journal and USA Today for her 20 years of helping thousands break old emotional patterns to live full-hearted lives. 
She believes when you optimize brain function your authentic self will be freed and empowered to lead a purposeful life.

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In the final episode of 'The Developmental' podcast for 2023, I explore a topic that has so far received very little attention - the role of the body in adult development. My guests, Natalie Goni and Hayley Linthwaite, are both pioneer practitioners at the intersection of vertical development and somatic practices and they bring a wealth of wisdom on the value of embodiment as a vehicle for personal growth.
We explore what embodiment is (and what its opposite - disembodiment - feels like), the importance of understanding and befriending our body, the impact of ignoring physical discomfort, and the link between embodiment and leadership. We discuss the delicate topic of introducing somatic practices into leadership development programs and the untapped value for leaders and businesses.
Natalie and Hayley both offer us the gift of two very different practices - so I’m encouraging you to listen to this episode in a private space where you might be able to get up, move or sit down, relax and close your eyes.
Show summary
01:01 Understanding Embodiment and Vertical Development
01:47 Introducing the Guests: Natalie Goni and Haley Linthwaite
05:52 Exploring the Journey to Embodiment
11:26 Understanding Disembodiment
16:41 Exploring the Concept of Embodiment
19:36 The Role of Embodiment in Vertical Development
33:10 Overcoming Resistance to Embodiment in Organizations
39:41 Rediscovering Joy Through Movement
40:15 The Challenge of Breaking Free from Conditioning
40:43 Exploring Dance and Movement in Different Contexts
41:47 The Healing Power of Movement
43:05 The Role of the Body in Leadership and Decision Making
44:25 The Impact of Physical State on Leadership
47:16 The Importance of Self-Regulation and Self-Awareness
50:48 The Connection Between Body and Mind in Decision Making
51:51 The Role of Intention in Leadership
55:43 The Role of Embodiment in Vertical Development
56:40 The Power of Embodiment in Leadership
59:42 Practical Exercises for Embodiment - Hayley and Natalie’s guided experiments
01:17:03 The Importance of Presence and Aliveness
01:20:22 Closing Thoughts and Future Plans
Useful Resources
Hayley’s website: https://hayleylinthwaite.com
Natalie’s website: https://nataliegoni.com
Peter Levine (trauma therapy through somatic experiencing): https://www.somaticexperiencing.com/about-peter
Bessel van der Kolk (neuroscience and trauma):
https://www.besselvanderkolk.com
360 Emergence (transformation through movement): https://the360emergence.com
Lindsay Braman (visual art, mental health, emotional regulation):
https://lindsaybraman.com
Guests’ Bios:
Hayley Linthwaite
For over 30 years, Hayley has made it her life’s work to ignite the sparks of transformative change all over the world. An experienced facilitator, coach, consultant, social entrepreneur and educator, she has empowered countless leaders and teams, facilitated multimillion-dollar organisational change programs, founded social enterprises, and cultivated a community of changemakers. 
She bridges the latest explorations in systems change, adult development and neuroscience with the transformative power of the arts and embodiment to unlock profound shifts in individuals and systems. All of her work is propelled by her unwavering belief in our human capacity to ignite change and create abundant futures.
She holds a PhD in Transformational Change (Applied Performance), a Master of Creative Industries in Drama Teaching, a Graduate Bachelor of Education, and a Bachelor of Arts in Drama.
Natalie Goni
With over a decade of developing talent and leaders at one of the world’s largest financial institutions and as an Executive Coach and Group Facilitator for the past seven years, Natalie has not only always worked in the field of growth and people development, but she is also an avid and continued explorer of her own development journey through the lenses of adult development, embodiment and our emotions.
Based in Hong Kong, Natalie is grateful to work

Content warning. This episode contains references to mental illness and suicide, which may be emotionally confronting or triggering to some listeners. If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out to a healthcare professional or call your local helpline.
Episode summary:
Kate Arms introduces us to the work of Polish psychologist and psychiatrist Kazimierz Dąbrowski, a brilliant developmentalist virtually unknown outside of the gifted and neurodivergent community, whose work centred on exploring how developmental growth unfolds through cycles of disintegration and re-integration.
I talked with Kate about why such moments of disintegration are vital to our long-term growth and at the same time incredibly difficult to navigate. We also explore why coaches could benefit from an understanding of this psychological process and all the painful emotions that arise as we breakdown and then breakthrough. We explore how, as coaches, we might support our clients to navigate the messy spaces towards a wiser, more mature, more balanced self and how we might help ourselves do the same.
00:00 Introduction and Welcoming Guest
00:54 Exploring the Intersection of Fields
01:32 The Role of Neurodivergence in Adult Development
02:10 Discovering Dąbrowski’s Work and its Impact
05:09 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Transformation
10:15 Understanding the Concept of 'Twice Exceptional'
11:48 The Power of Coaching in Personal Growth
12:26 The Role of Emotions in Development
17:04 Exploring Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration
29:12 Understanding Developmental Potential and Overexcitabilities
36:38 The Role of a Coach in Navigating Disintegration
39:33 The Intersection of Coaching and Therapy
47:16 The Impact of Developmental Theory on Personal Growth
About Kate Arms, JD, CPCC, PCC
For over 35 years, Kate has been studying the question of how to create social groups that thrive as communities while community members thrive as individuals. She has deep interests in human physiology and neurodiversity, the role of ritual and art in personal transformation, collective creativity, change management, and governance structures that support individual and collective evolution.
Kate has been a professional coach for over a decade and has been mentoring and teaching coaching since 2016. From the very beginning, her coaching practice focused on coaching creators and innovators, twice-exceptional and profoundly gifted adults, and parents of twice-exceptional kids. Her current portfolio of work includes private coaching, teaching and guiding coaches at the Neurodiversity Coaching Academy, and organizational leadership development and Agile coaching.In all her work, she focuses on transformational culture-building and designing systems to support adaptive change that sticks.
Her book, L.I.F.T.: A Coach Approach to Parenting, presents an approach to parenting that helps parents bring out the best in their family relationships as they help their children navigate the challenges of growing up in the modern world.
She holds a BA in Theatre and Biopsychology from Cornell University and a JD from Harvard Law School. She is credentialed as an International Coach Federation PCC, a certified ICAgile Expert in Enterprise Coaching, and a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach. She is a graduate of the Co-Active Leadership Program.
Useful resources
More about Dąbrowski’s work and a brilliant podcast hosted by Dr. Chris Wells: https://dabrowskicenter.org/podcast/
An overview of overexcitabilities and why you need to be aware of them (especially if you are raising gifted kids or you were one yourself): https://www.verywellfamily.com/dabrowskis-overexcitabilities-in-gifted-children-1449118
A wonderful book on overexcitabilities (addressed to gifted adults too): https://www.amazon.com.au/Living-Intensity-Understanding-Sensitivity-Excitability/dp/0910707898
Kate Arms’ and Tracy Winter’s website for all coaches interested in neurodiversity: ht

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Saturday, 20th of February 1999. 11pm
“I have long worried that if I were to lay down my thoughts in the pages of a journal that would give anyone a gateway into my most intimate musings, and I was afraid to risk it. Until now… I do believe that writing will give my future self an opportunity to go back in time, to re-live the past, to understand it not just with the mind of my future self, but through the eyes of my present self.
Perhaps time will make my memories fade and my grown up self will look back on my teenage years with a completely different perception than my own right now. I’m hoping this journal, which I am starting tonight, will help me better understand my own children when they get to the age I am now. Perhaps it will help future me bridge the ‘generation gap’ …”
This is the first entry in my first-ever journal. I started it when I was 16. My worry that my parents would read it was smaller than my worry that unless I did write, I would forever lose the memory of my teenage self and, with it, the proof that I had looked at the world in ways that seemed incomprehensible to the grown-ups around me at the time.
Through my eyes, adults seemed to be afflicted with a strange sort of amnesia, that had erased any trace of their 16 year-old-selves and made them incapable of understanding the anxieties, passions and visceral intensity of regular teenagers like me. The thought I would one day forget too was terrifying. The journal was an attempt to hold my future self to account, but also my best shot at looking out for the children I knew I would raise someday. I didn’t want them to ever feel as disconnected from or misunderstood by the adult world as I did back then.
That first journal evolved into over a dozen notebooks, spanning 24 years of my life and keeping a record of my becoming. Journaling became the one habit I was able to maintain through life’s highs and lows. I journaled through joy, hope, my first love, through my first heartbreak. I journaled through the death of loved ones, through divorce, through professional highs and the depths of despair. I’ve journaled about dreams that seemed impossible and then came true and journaled through failure and pain.
I’ve journaled when pregnant - when I got to re-read my earliest journals and cry in gratitude for the priceless gift my 16-year-old self had left me. It’s a gift that to this day is helping me be a more conscious mother and keeps amnesia at bay. When my daughter turns 16, I’ll likely share my journals with her and let her make sense of them for herself. Perhaps my own 16-year-old will be a better partner for her at that stage than my middle-aged self. I also secretly hope she’ll start her own journal one day. I’m pretty sure I’ll be journaling for as long as my mind can reflect and my hands able to write. I’m looking forward to adding another shelf for my journals and, in the process, stepping through life as consciously as I possibly can.
I have come to consider this one of the simplest and most powerful developmental practices and credit it for much of my growth. I deeply wish more people considered making it part of their lives. And here’s my case for why.
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Over the years I’ve shared my love of journaling with countless teams and leaders. I’ve met people who had experienced the benefits of the practice themselves and were true believers. I’ve met many others who believed it might be useful but were convinced they could never muster the

While empirical evidence for adult development theories is robust, we still have much to learn about the cognitive and neurological substrates of human development. What changes in our brain when we develop vertically? How can the idea that humans evolve in ever-increasing stages of mental complexity and perspective-taking be reconciled with research on neuroplasticity and cognition?
I was very excited to step into this fascinating in-between space together with Johan Mellerup Traekjaer a cognitive scientist with deep expertise in adult development. Here are a few of the key ideas we touched on:
Brief Episode Notes:
[00:00:00] Alis and Johan dive into the intersection of adult development and neuroscience.
[00:02:00] Johan's background: From feeling like a school misfit to exploring cognitive science and time in the military.
[00:08:00] Introduction to non-linear dynamics in cognitive development.
[00:10:00] The brain's preference for predictability and its growth implications.
[00:18:00] The brain's models of reality and their subjective nature.
[00:31:00] The value of stepping outside one's comfort zone
[00:33:00] Role of emotions in adult development and perspective shifts.
[00:39:00] Connection between learning and inherent discomfort.
[00:44:30] The brain's "handbrake" activates in overwhelming situations.
[00:47:30] Value of taking small, uncomfortable steps for brain development.
[00:49:00] Stress's influence on working memory, decision-making and perspective-taking
[00:59:00] We're part of larger systems, not isolated entities.
[01:00:30] Vision of a society prioritizing development and collective wisdom.
[01:03:30] Societal benefits of focusing on developmental work.
[01:05:30] Closing reflections and gratitude.
About Johan Mellerup Traekjaer
Johan has a diverse background ranging from academia to military and security work. In the early years, Johan worked on the frontline as a protection officer, security operator and consultant as well as in the rehabilitation of young offenders. He eventually swung in an academic direction, lecturing and researching cognitive science and organisational psychology, while still keeping a foot in the high-stakes world training various operators in stress management, threat and tactical security behaviour, and high-risk conflict management. He has been leading an academic leadership program for senior noncom officers and Air Force pilots. 
Previously associate professor at UC South Denmark and currently a senior consultant at Amara Collaboration and scientific advisor at Shifting Horizons, Johan has been exploring the space between science, spirituality, and adult development for two decades and will continue to do so. His primary interest is the interplay between human consciousness, biological systems and physics. Johan lives in Denmark and enjoys his free time reading extensively, sea kayaking, running, self-defence and when there is time, exploring the wild. 
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Additional resources:
Amy Arnsten’s research on stress: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/amy-arnsten/
A brilliant article from Johan on the importance of action towards building wisdom: https://amara.fi/it-often-hurts-to-become-wiser/
An initial study in the neuroscience of adult development: Toward a Neuroscience of Adult Cognitive Developmental Theory: https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fnins.2018.00004/full
A study on the brain of contemplative practitioners and links to adult development: "Brain Structure and Functional Connectivity Correlate with Psychosocial Development in Contemplative Practitioners and Controls" https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34070890/
Navigating the Affordance Landscape: Feedback Control as a Process Model of Behavior and Cognition: http://www.ldnc.uns.edu.ar/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/pagina3.pdf
Joscha Bach: Life, Intelligenc