On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg
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Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

  1. 6 DAYS AGO

    #205: How to Process a Sudden Break-Up (AKA the "Avoidant Discard")

    When a relationship ends without warning, it’s common to feel blindsided, confused, and deeply hurt. This is often labelled the “avoidant discard” — but while that term might feel validating in the moment, it can also keep you stuck in a disempowering story. In this episode, we’ll talk about how to process a sudden ending in a way that honours your pain without leaving you tethered to it. We’ll explore: Why shock and lack of closure can intensify heartbreakThe difference between feeling discarded and being discardedHow villain/victim narratives can hold you back from real healingThe impact of online echo chambers on your recoveryPractical steps to reclaim your agency and move forwardThis isn’t about minimising what you’ve been through. It’s about finding a more grounded, self-responsible way to engage with what happened — so you can process it fully, integrate the lessons, and step into your next chapter with clarity and self-respect. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    22 min

  2. 2 SEPT

    #204: Why You Keep Repeating the Same Relationship Patterns

    Ever look back at your dating history and realise you’ve basically been in the same relationship over and over again — just with different people? Maybe you thought you’d learned the lessons, yet somehow the same dynamics keep playing out. In this episode, we’re unpacking why these patterns form, why they feel so hard to break, and how you can start shifting them. We’ll explore how your early experiences shape an unconscious “blueprint” for love, how your nervous system pulls you toward what feels familiar (even when it’s not healthy), and the beliefs that keep certain dynamics on repeat. I’ll walk you through a process for spotting your own relational through-lines, interrupting the cycle, and expanding your capacity for the kind of steady, reciprocal love you deserve. Whether you’re in the thick of another “same story, different person” relationship or reflecting on past patterns, this episode will give you clarity, compassion, and practical steps to move toward something different. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    20 min

  3. 26 AUG

    #203: How to Soften Your Inner Critic and Forgive Yourself for the Past

    If you struggle with a harsh inner critic — whether it shows up as perfectionism, relentless self-judgment, or shame about the past — this episode is for you. We’re unpacking the roots of that punitive inner voice, how it tries to keep us safe, and the real cost it can have on our self-worth, our nervous system, and our ability to grow. We’ll also explore what it looks like to relate to ourselves differently: to meet our inner critic with compassion rather than fear, and to begin the process of forgiving ourselves for the things we wish we’d done differently. In this episode, we’ll cover: The role of the inner critic and what it’s really trying to doWhy punishing yourself doesn’t lead to growth (and what does)Why self-forgiveness can be so difficultHow to hold responsibility without collapsing into shamePractical ways to begin softening your inner critic and making peace with your pastHighlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    17 min

  4. 19 AUG

    #202: How Attachment Styles Influence Friendship Dynamics

    We don’t often talk about how attachment dynamics play out in friendships — but if you’ve ever felt anxious, hurt, or overly invested in a friend who seemed to be pulling away, you’ll know just how triggering these relationships can be. While attachment theory was originally developed to explain the infant-caregiver bond and later applied to romantic relationships, many of the same fears, patterns, and protective strategies show up in our platonic relationships too — especially when they carry emotional significance. In this episode, we’re exploring how different attachment styles can impact the way we relate to our friends, why friendship ruptures can feel just as painful (if not more so) than romantic ones, and how to navigate these dynamics with more clarity, compassion, and self-respect. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    22 min

  5. 12 AUG

    #201: How to Actually Heal from a Breakup

    If you’re someone with anxious attachment patterns, the ending of a relationship can bring up some of your deepest wounds: feelings of abandonment, not being enough, being too much, or fears that you’ll never find love again. In today’s episode, I’m offering a more grounded, intentional path through heartbreak — one that doesn’t rely on ruminating, obsessing, or waiting for closure from someone else. We’re talking about how to actually heal from a breakup, rather than just surviving it. I’ll walk you through: Why grieving fully is essential (and how we often mistake rumination for grief)The stories we tell ourselves post-breakup, and how they shape our sufferingHow to find closure within yourself, instead of waiting for your ex to give it to youWhat it means to really learn the lessons of a breakupWhy getting clear on what you want in future relationships is one of the most powerful things you can do before moving onWhether your breakup was recent or something you still carry with you, my hope is that this episode supports you in finding your way back to yourself — with clarity, compassion, and courage. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    22 min

  6. 5 AUG

    #200: How to Like Yourself More

    So many of us struggle with the idea of self-love. For me, and for many others, it can feel vague, aspirational, or simply out of reach. But what if, instead of trying to love ourselves, we focused on becoming someone we actually like? In today’s episode, I’m sharing five practical and tangible ways to do just that. This is about taking honest, grounded steps that help you build real self-respect, pride, and internal alignment. Whether you’re feeling disconnected from yourself, stuck in self-judgment, or just wanting to feel better in your own skin, this episode is for you. We’ll explore: How to identify where you’re out of alignment with your valuesWhy following through on your boundaries builds self-trustThe importance of noticing who or what brings out the worst in youWhy prioritising your wellbeing is essentialWhy you should seek out opportunities to make yourself proudHighlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    23 min

  7. 30 JULY

    #199: How Our Early Imprints Shape Our Lives & Relationships with Lael Stone

    In this episode, I’m joined by educator, speaker, and author Lael Stone to explore the powerful role that early imprints play in shaping the stories we carry — about ourselves, others, and the world around us. We dive into how our earliest experiences — especially within our family system — inform the narratives we unconsciously live by. We talk about what it means to bring those stories into conscious awareness, and how to begin rewriting the ones that no longer serve us. Whether you’re deep in your healing journey or just beginning to explore your inner world, this conversation is a reminder that we’re not defined by our past — and that we have the power to tell a new story. Connect with Lael Stone Instagram: @laelstone Website: laelstone.com.au Purchase Lael's new book, Own Your Story Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    54 min

  8. 22 JULY

    #198: What Anxiously Attached People Need to Thrive in a Relationship

    When you have an anxious attachment style, it can be hard to know what you actually need to feel secure — especially if past relationships have left you second-guessing yourself or trying to manage your anxiety by suppressing your needs. In this episode, we’re exploring five key ingredients that help anxiously attached people thrive in relationships. These aren’t about seeking constant reassurance or outsourcing your self-worth — they’re about being in relational environments that support security, growth, and genuine connection. What we cover in this episode: How consistency supports nervous system regulation and builds trust over timeThe importance of emotional validation in helping you feel understood and connectedWhy clear and reliable communication matters more than constant contactThe role of safe conflict in creating long-term security and repairHow having a shared vision helps settle the fear of uncertainty and misalignmentWhether you’re currently dating or in a relationship, this episode will help you get clearer on what’s supportive for you — and how to recognise when your needs are being met versus when you’re stuck in a cycle of over-functioning or hoping for crumbs. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website

    22 min
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About

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships. 

Information

  • Creator
    Stephanie Rigg
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2025
  • Episodes
    205
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 On Attachment
  • Show Website
    On Attachment

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