A LITTLE MORE IMPERFECTS

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The Imperfects

Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg
  • 4.9 (21)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

  1. Dr Lucy Hone - A Life Worth Grieving

    9 HRS AGO

    Dr Lucy Hone - A Life Worth Grieving

    Two cataclysmic events have shaped Dr Lucy Hone’s relationship with grief, and resilience. 💌Join 5,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Today in the Academy of Imperfection, we welcome Dr Lucy Hone. Dr Lucy’s work focuses on making sense of the senseless, and helping others to do the same. As a legitimate expert in grief, resilience and wellbeing, Dr Lucy is able to blend the science with her own lived experience. This episode explores living losses (divorce, estrangement, infertility), grief comparison, as well as the research around post-traumatic growth. Guided by questions from Dr Lucy’s latest book, How will I ever get through this?, Hugh, Josh and Ryan ask Dr Lucy why grief feels so lonely, how you are supposed to accept loss, and will you ever be happy again, amongst others. This is a special one. 0:00 – An Unsuspecting Saturday Morning 12:11 – Grief comparison 21:25 – How am I supposed to accept this? 31:14 – How do you keep hope alive? 35:48 – Why do I feel so lonely? 50:20 – Will I ever be happy again? 56:36 – Letting the other children live 1:03:44 – Do you know your strengths? 1:09:12 – Who and what do you want to live for? 1:14:59 – Who and what is good in your world? To full this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Zyb7kELxFxI  🫖 Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Dr Emily - Grief Lightening - https://bit.ly/3ZPVNmO Dr Emily - Other People Matter - https://bit.ly/3Oku8b4 Dr Emily - Goals For Your Goals - https://bit.ly/4rAK3AF 📖 Things to read How Will I Ever Get Through This by Dr Lucy Hone - https://bit.ly/4bAWO9w Resilient Grieving by Dr Lucy Hone - https://bit.ly/4kpkf8g Oscillation Grief Theory - https://bit.ly/4qZ5WK1 Michael F. Steger - Meaning and Purpose Work - https://michaelfsteger.com J. William Worden - Four Tasks of Mourning - https://bit.ly/3NTGPcU 💻Things to check out Dr Lucy’s website - https://www.drlucyhone.com 3 Secrets of Resilient People TedTalk - https://bit.ly/3Zguj9S Dr Lucy’s ‘Look Forward To’ Calendar VIA Strengths test - http://bit.ly/4h2KYFJ Coping With Loss community on Facebook - https://bit.ly/3NTnDvT Welcome to Holland poem - https://bit.ly/4kgB0lH Will Arnett + Conan O’Brien on Grief - https://bit.ly/4a06320 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 24m
  2. Claudia Karvan - Love, Her Way

    FEB 1

    Claudia Karvan - Love, Her Way

    Stop. Everything. Now. It’s Claudia Karvan day. 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy An icon of the screen, and of the heart, Claudia is Australian entertainment royalty. Claudia’s life itself feels like a movie (no one else grew up in a nightclub, did they?) and it was an absolute privilege to listen to all the lessons that she has learnt along the way. With incredible grace, Claudia talks to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about playing the long game during divorce, and how she came to the realisation that it wasn’t up to her to fix everything. Claudia speaks openly about separating the person from the diagnosis, and how, and why, she thinks so often about death. This is one for the highlight reel. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, click on this link - https://youtu.be/4qH4vBr0i6Y 0:00 – Hugh ‘questionable-decisions’ van Cuylenburg 12:24 – The role of a lifetime 17:55 – An unconventional childhood 28:50 – It’s not up to you to fix everything 39:55 – The opening of another world 45:47 – Doing it all (with support) 51:12 – Love and family HER way 59:33 – Play the long game1:07:15 – Managing mental ill-health 1:24:39 – The benefit of helping others 1:26:48 – How to love in a healthy way 🥸 Which Imperfects Host Are You Quiz? - https://tally.so/r/Xx4PEO 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Stephen Curry - I Dug a Hole … and Found Myself - https://bit.ly/3ZpPNkN Hannah Ferguson - Outspoken But Not Broken - https://bit.ly/3M8SC6y 📺 Things to watch Love My Way - https://bit.ly/4qFCjNA The Secret Life of Us - https://bit.ly/3Z1Thtt The Queen of Versailles - https://bit.ly/3Z5FemE Australian Story - The Secret Life of Claudia Karvan - https://bit.ly/3ZE8p0g Who Do You Think You Are? with Claudia Karvan - https://bit.ly/4bIw3QL Bump - https://bit.ly/49O16Jv 📖 Things to read The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche - https://bit.ly/4k8qdtR 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 38m
  3. Esther Perel's Relationship Advice for Josh

    JAN 26 • SUBSCRIBERS ONLY

    Esther Perel's Relationship Advice for Josh

    Do you remember the time we had THE Esther Perel on the podcast? We certainly do. This week on A Little More Imperfects, Josh revisits that interview; what he learnt about prioritising quality time, and whether he has put those learnings into practice. And then, it’s just another wacky day in Hugh’s life, and he definitely-absolutely-couldn’t’ve gotten scammed because “she was just so lovely”. PSA (specifically for Hugh van Cuylenburg): If someone calls up and asks for your credit card number, it’s usually a red flag. And the tiniest of updates. Dare we say, love is in the air? We love you the most (don’t tell anyone else). 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Esther Perel - Let’s Be Better Lovers - https://bit.ly/4a2Jvwf Is Ryan having kids? Where is he at now? - https://bit.ly/49HcsyR 🎧Things to listen to Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel - https://bit.ly/4bfc5N8 📺 Things to watch Troy Kinne The Magic Basket Sketch - https://bit.ly/4qJwRta 💌 Send us your reflections! theimperfects.com.au/contact/

    41 min
  4. Soul Searching Summer - Ryan’s TV Show

    JAN 25

    Soul Searching Summer - Ryan’s TV Show

    Ryan’s got news. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Well, past-Ryan had news, and now future-Ryan is going to reflect on how present-day-Ryan is currently feeling about said news. Get it? It’s reflecting on a reflection about a rejection. Today we’re giving you two for the price of none, and bringing you two of the most memorable moments from our subscriber based show A Little More Imperfects. With both segments focusing on wildest dreams, Hugh, Ryan and Josh explore how to navigate regret when you’re not at your best, and how to show yourself compassion and love when your dreams are, well, crushed. Also, we ask Hugh what happened to him today. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Ilg-r9gHGPk 🩵Sign up for A Little More Imperfects here Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/4aSIeKd 🩷Sign up to the My Imperfect Email here https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode James van Cuylenburg - Love Your Wonky Bricks - https://bit.ly/457hYZA Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/454PJL6 Isaac Humphries - Coming Out on Court - https://bit.ly/4jQtxtD See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    46 min
  5. Spooky Summer - Hugh’s Haunted House

    JAN 18

    Spooky Summer - Hugh’s Haunted House

    Do you believe in ghosts? Josh doesn’t, Ryan does, and Hugh is actually being haunted. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep It’s the second episode of our super sexy summer series (the alliteration is wild in this episode), and we’re revisiting the time that Hugh got haunted. Blending together a few episodes of A Little More Imperfects, our subscriber platform that you can sign up for below, we’ll introduce you to Geraint the shamanic healer, what happened during Hugh’s ghost busting appointment, and whether Hugh has had any paranormal activity since. And finally, whether this whole ordeal has convinced Josh that ghosts are real. Long live summer! 0:00 – A phoenus? Draw it 4:17 – Team Josh v Team Ryan 10:28 – Meeting the shamanic healer 16:25 – The not-so-light-hearted update 30:01 – Cursed artwork: to burn or not to burn 35:46 – Has the ghost been busted? If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/u4XNRTLXtrQ  🩵Sign up for A Little More Imperfects here Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/4aSIeKd 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity - https://bit.ly/49TSktd Maria Ruberto - Sleep Your Way To Your Top - https://bit.ly/49jJJ2S 👻Ghost busters Garant 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    40 min
  6. Psychology Summer - Your Inner Fan with Dr Emily

    JAN 11

    Psychology Summer - Your Inner Fan with Dr Emily

    Today, we come to you with a gift: bonus Dr Emily. Thank you in advance for the standing ovation. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Welcoming you into the world of A Little More Imperfects, our subscriber-based platform available on Patreon and Apple Podcasts, our resident psychologist Dr Emily reaches into the reflection pond, to discuss and decode a reflection from one of our community members. Responding to this reflection, Dr Emily chats to Ryan, Josh, and special guest Producer Bridge, about how life changing it can be to receive an ADHD diagnosis, as well as the not so joyful emotions, such as grief and anger, which can accompany this. Josh talks about his own inner critic, which leads into a broader discussion about self-compassion, top down vs bottom up therapy, and the therapeutic benefits to showing up for your younger self as the adult you are today. Don’t say we don’t spoil you. If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzBxIFUOJL0  🩷To join our A Little More Imperfects Community Patreon - https://bit.ly/3KQvB7R Apple Podcasts - https://bit.ly/499aZRs 🩵Where to send in your reflections https://bit.ly/4rYjfuS 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Janelle Booker - Living with ADHD - https://bit.ly/4rXQIG0 Hugh’s ADHD … brief - https://bit.ly/3MJBzb4 Ben Crowe (Pt 1) - Meet Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/3KHwJdX Ben Crowe (Pt 2) - Now BE Your Inner Fan - https://bit.ly/49bVxnB James van Cuylenburg - Love Your Wonky Bricks - https://bit.ly/3MzZKZz What’s Your ATAR? - https://bit.ly/4pwNZBG 📺Things to watch The Rehearsal - https://bit.ly/48V6IA0 Good Will Hunting - https://bit.ly/4iW7hhn Rick Hanson - Velcro for the Bad, Teflon for the Good - https://bit.ly/4rVpe3R 💻 Things to do Rick Hanson - Positive Neuroplasticity Training - https://bit.ly/48COcgN 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1h 8m
  7. Is Ryan having kids? Where is he at now?

    JAN 11 · BONUS • SUBSCRIBERS ONLY

    Is Ryan having kids? Where is he at now?

    Well, well, well. Welcome to summer, our *A Little More Imperfects* loves, where there is only one thing we know for sure: Ryan Shelton loves a dance. In this episode, Hugh brings a rebrand of ‘Hugh’s Offcuts’ (cue the smattering of applause from a few lonely enthusiasts, including George). And we get introduced to ‘The Raw Dog’ and ‘The Dog’. And THEN, the update you have all been waiting for. Ryan revisits one of his past Vulnerabilitea House episodes, ‘To breed, or not to breed’, and chats to Hugh and Josh about how he is feeling three years on. We are so excited to be back, Ciao, ciao, molto bene! 🫖 Other episodes mentioned in this episode - Ryan Shelton - To breed, or not to breed - https://bit.ly/3NdHZQa - Ann Davidman - Should You Have Children? - https://bit.ly/45GB0FF 📺 Things to watch - Limitless - https://bit.ly/49LeIFb

    42 min
  8. A little more…Connection This Christmas

    2025-12-23 · BONUS • SUBSCRIBERS ONLY

    A little more…Connection This Christmas

    It’s Christmas, and we’re with our favourite people in the world (you guys). The queggestion box is back baby, and we’re coming in hot with a live show Q&A, where you will find out how wrong Josh is about bowser etiquette. Hugh has some suggestions for a meet + greet, and they are all very specifically food related. Ryan has a Christmas Mystery. Please find stocktake reveal below. We crack open the frozen reflection pond (pond, pond, pond), to read an incredible reflection from Deb, based on the question, “what does Christmas time mean to you?” And then we get grateful (and jazzy) and say some heartfelt thank you’s. Things mentioned in this episode; Buy tickets to our Newcastle Live Show - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Chocolate Bomb Indulgence - https://bit.ly/4s0oZnZ Sign up to my imperfect email, where you can submit reflections into the pond - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Buy our journal, my imperfect life - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz Stocktake Reveal: As of the chocolate’s return to the office, 55% was eaten.

    41 min
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4.9
out of 5
21 Ratings

About

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

Information

  • Creator
    Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2026
  • Episodes
    294
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg
  • Show Website
    The Imperfects
  • Provider
    The Imperfects Podcast Pty Ltd

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