Parenting Teenagers Untangled for Fearless Parents: I help you fear less and wonder more

Rachel Richards

Parenting teenagers often throws up questions we never thought we’d need to ask. Why is my teenager suddenly so angry? How much screen time is too much? Should I take their phone away at night? Why have they lost all motivation? What do I do about vaping, friendship problems, anxiety, parties, dating, exams… or a teenager who simply won’t talk to me? There’s a very good chance we’ve already talked about it on this podcast. Teenagers Untangled has a huge and growing library of episodes covering the questions, worries and challenges that come with raising tweens and teenagers. Rather than scrolling through hundreds of episodes trying to find the right one, use the search bar to search for what’s happening in your family right now. How to search: Simply type a keyword or short phrase into the search box. Try things like: anger • anxiety • phones • motivation • sleep • ADHD • vaping • alcohol • friendship • school • exams • lying • boundaries • consequences • social media • first love • university • leaving home You can also try different words if your first search doesn’t bring up exactly what you need. For example, if you’re worried about your teenager being rude, you might also search respect, anger, conflict or communication. The search will bring up relevant Teenagers Untangled episodes so you can go straight to the conversations that are most useful to you. Think of it as a parenting database, So don't feel you need to start with our newest episode — start with your question. And if I haven't covered your question yet, tell me. Some of my best episodes begin with a question from a parent just like you. Whatever stage you're at, you don't have to figure it all out from scratch. Chances are, we've already started untangling it. FEARLESS PARENTING: Most parenting advice tells you what to do. I help you see things differently. Fear tells us our teenager is lazy, rude, addicted or deliberately difficult. Wonder asks, What's really going on? What need, skill or fear might I be missing? When we replace fear with curiosity, we make better decisions, drop our judgement and start connecting, and raise young people who are more resilient, independent and emotionally healthy. Join thousands of parents each week as we learn to Fear Less. Wonder More. If this resonates with you, join me on SUBSTACK: For those of you who want to read my thoughts beyond the podcast, or who just want to help me feel like the pebbles I have dropped in the ocean of life are making a difference, why not join my paid community? You’ll get one-to-one support and printable PDF’s that give you the top tips from each podcast episode so you have your own little, bespoke manual. COMMUNITY: I’ll be offering regular extras, including tips and thoughts, that help you tune into what matters. NOTES: So many listeners say they have rewound the episodes to write down notes, well now there’s no need. Paid subscribers will have a weekly, downloadable, summary of the top tips from each episode, so you don’t have to take notes. Please let me know if there are any old episodes for which you’d like the notes. I’m very happy to supply them.

  1. 21 hr ago

    Empty Nest: How to Cope When Your Teen Goes off to College or University. Vintage

    Ask Rachel anything In this episode of Teenagers Untangled, we’re talking about what happens when the children we’ve poured our hearts, time, and energy into finally leave home. If you’re facing the prospect of a child heading off to university or moving out—and feeling anything from pride and excitement to grief, anxiety, or a loss of identity—this episode is for you. First, I revisit a powerful conversation with mindfulness coach Susie Asli, where we unpack empty nest syndrome: why feelings of grief, loneliness, or even physical symptoms like sleeplessness and nausea are a normal response,how your identity as a parent can feel shaken when your child leaves,and practical ways to prepare yourself emotionally, rebuild routines, and reconnect—with yourself, with your partner, and with your wider life.Then I speak with Hannah Bankier, a coach specialising in personal and professional transitions and founder of Birdie Launcher. Hannah invites us to rethink the very idea of an “empty nest” and instead see this stage as a launchpad—for our children and for ourselves. She shares: how to start preparing years before your child leaves,how to evolve your parenting from “controller” to “mentor,”how to co-create a new kind of relationship with your emerging adult,and how to rediscover your own purpose, joy, and identity beyond being “Mum.”You're not broken if you're feeling grief. You're ready to start a new chapter. Hannah Bankier All the tips from this episode Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    Empty Nest: How to Cope When Your Teen Goes off to College or University. Vintage
  2. 1 day ago ·  Bonus

    Exam Results: What if my teen doesn't get the A level grades they want? Vintage

    Ask Rachel anything A listener parenting a teen son wrote to say both of them felt pretty stunned when he was rejected from the university he'd set his heart on. She asked for the best way to help our teenagers cope with this sort of disappointment.  I thought it was a great question and a good opportunity to also look at how we parents can best navigate when our teen has worked for years toward a dream - a top university place, exam results, a team, a part - and it doesn’t happen. The disappointment can feel earth‑shattering for them and gut‑wrenching for you. In this episode I talk with Dr Dominique Thompson, award‑winning GP and young people’s mental health expert, about how to support teenagers through big disappointments such as university rejection, exam failure, and missed opportunities – without rescuing them or minimising their feelings. We explore: What teens are actually grieving when things go wrong – including the loss of an imagined futureHow to validate their emotions while gently stopping catastrophic thinkingThe difference between building resilience and teaching kids to suppress their feelingsWhy today’s culture of perfectionism and “being the best” is driving anxiety, burnout and fear of failureHow to help teens separate self‑worth from grades, offers and achievementsPractical ways to prepare teens for university life, academic stress and independenceWhen dropping out isn’t the only option – how to press pause, get help and return strongerWhat to do if your teen feels “left behind” while friends move on to university or big opportunitiesHow parents can be a “safe harbour”: supportive, boundaried, and not adding their own disappointment to their teen’s loadIf you’re a parent wondering how to respond when your child says, “I’ve failed you,” or “There’s no point trying,” this conversation will give you concrete language, mindset shifts and step‑by‑step strategies to help them cope, reframe, and find a new path forward. Dr Dominique Thompson: is a multi-award winning former GP, young people's mental health expert, TEDx speaker, author and educator, with over two decades of NHS clinical experience. She is author of The Student Wellbeing Series for young people, and co-author of How to Grow a Grown Up (PenguinRandomHouse) for parents. dominique.thompson@me.com www.buzzconsulting.co.uk  https://www.instagram.com/drdomthompson/ https://www.facebook.com/drdomthompson/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/dominique-thompson/ Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    Exam Results: What if my teen doesn't get the A level grades they want? Vintage
  3. 5 Aug

    How to Prepare Your Child for College & University: The Teen view on Friends, Safety, Study, Money and Freshers Week.

    Ask Rachel anything Sending your teen off to university can feel both exciting and terrifying. In this episode of Parenting Teenagers Untangled, I talk with my 19-year-old daughter Phoebe, home after her first year at Oxford University, about what parents really need to know to prepare their teens for university life.  We cover the big worries parents Google most: how teens make friends in Freshers’ Week, coping with the academic workload, dealing with drinking, drugs and peer pressure, managing money and budgeting, handling homesickness and mental health, and how to balance independence with safety. If you’re wondering how to support your child’s transition to university without being overbearing—and how to trust them while still keeping them safe—this honest, practical conversation will give you clear guidance, real examples, and reassuring perspective from both a parent and a student. Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    How to Prepare Your Child for College & University: The Teen view on Friends, Safety, Study, Money and Freshers Week.
  4. 29 Jul ·  Video

    How to Be a Calm Parent to Teens using Boundaries with Diane Sorensen

    Ask Rachel anything Are you tired of yelling at your teen – and hating yourself afterwards? In this episode of Teenagers Untangled, I talked with parenting and relationship coach Diane Sorensen about how to stay calm with teens, stop power struggles, and set healthy boundaries without becoming a pushover. If you’re dealing with eye-rolling, “disrespectful” attitudes, shouting matches, and constant tension at home, this conversation will help you: Understand why you get so triggered by your teen’s behaviorShift from controlling behavior to nurturing real connectionUse simple emotional regulation tools to pause before you explodeTell the difference between calm parenting and permissive parentingCreate healthy boundaries that reduce resentment and build trustRepair after you’ve shouted and show your teen that change is possibleWe talk about creating boundaries, unpack practical strategies like the PARR method (Pause, Acknowledge, Respond, Reflect), how to reframe “disrespect” as information, and why owning your triggers is the fastest way to transform your relationship with your teen. If you’ve ever thought, “I promised I wouldn’t parent like this, but I don’t know how to stop,” this episode is for you. Diane Sorensen Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    How to Be a Calm Parent to Teens using Boundaries with Diane Sorensen
  5. 22 Jul ·  Video

    Blended Families: How to Connect With a Child Who Doesn't Accept You

    Ask Rachel anything If you’ve ever fallen in love with someone who already has children, or tried to blend two families and thought, “Why is this so hard? What’s wrong with me?” – this episode is for you. You are not broken, and you are definitely not alone. I was joined by Masha Rusanov, coach, writer, and author of Repatterned. Together we unpack: Why step‑parenting can feel so emotionally different from parenting your biological childrenHow to prioritise connection before correction with bonus kidsThe idea of “natural parenting” – why step‑parents shouldn’t be the main disciplinariansWhat healthy co‑parenting and emotional regulation look like when there are exes, new partners, and multiple households in the mixPractical, everyday strategies to reduce conflict and build trust over timeClick here for all of the tips from the episode Whether you’re a step‑parent, a biological parent in a blended family, or you co‑parent across different homes, this conversation will help you feel seen, supported, and better equipped for the long game. Masha Rusanov Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    Blended Families: How to Connect With a Child Who Doesn't Accept You
  6. 15 Jul ·  Video

    Parenting Myths That Make Mothers Miserable

    Ask Rachel anything Are women naturally good at being mothers or is that a cultural myth?  It matters because if we believe women are naturally good at it then they deserve no kudos for the work they do and when we do struggle it lays the blame firmly at our feet, rather than the society we live in.  In this episode, I was joined by historian and postnatal practitioner Alex Bollen, author of Motherdom, to unpack the “good mother” myths shaping our culture—and our guilt.  We challenge the idea that care is “natural,” reveal how shaky science and social media fuel certainty and shame, and show why there’s no single right way to raise teens.  You’ll learn practical tools to lower pressure at home: the weekly myth check, the “misery test” for your to‑do list, stress reframes that build resilience, and village-building strategies that widen support for you and your child. Step away from perfection, toward curiosity and community—and parent your teen with more calm, confidence, and kindness. Read the episode write-up here Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    Parenting Myths That Make Mothers Miserable
  7. 8 Jul ·  Video

    The vital parenting shift: becoming a mentor to your teen

    Ask Rachel anything Welcome to a special mini-series from Teenagers Untangled — seven simple, practical "parenting seeds" to plant over a week, preparing for when your child moves into secondary school or returns from summer.  These are gentle shifts, not rules to perfect: They're designed to help you focus on what really matters, and reduce your stress.  They'll help you to move from fixing problems to mentoring your child, build emotional safety at home, and give your teen the confidence to make good choices.  These are the big picture things I wish I had known much earlier in the teen years. If you'd like an early release of this information and daily email reminders as the series unfolds, and more support, join me on Substack Seven seeds: Changing gears: be explicit about the shift in your parenting from monitoring to mentoring. Make home safe and predictable: create routines and anchors so home feels stable amid constant change.Catch them doing good: notice and praise strengths to build a positive identity and reduce fear of mistakes.Listen until they feel understood (LUFU): use super silence and active listening; summarise and ask before offering advice.Model what you want to see: especially with technology: demonstrate the habits you want your teen to adopt.Be curious about yourself: notice triggers, respond with curiosity not criticism, and model emotional regulation.Talk to your kids before others do: proactively discuss vaping, pornography, nudes, drugs, alcohol and groomers. Role-play responses so they’re prepared before they come under pressure. Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    The vital parenting shift: becoming a mentor to your teen
  8. 1 Jul ·  Bonus

    Reading Festival Advice From Teens: Vintage

    Ask Rachel anything Announcing my summer top tips series where I give you a short episode of tips organised around themes to help you focus on what you and your tween or teen needs to prepare you for the new school year. Make sure you’re following the show to ensure you don’t miss any and if you want to get them early and have the tips delivered weekly directly to you just click here Send me the free newsletter and enter our email address. You’ll get them straight to your mailbox.  The tips start next week, in the meantime here’s a rerun of the Reading Festival episode because I’ve had so much amazing feedback on it: Music festivals are a rite of passage for many teens. Whilst some love the music, the lack of restriction and opportunities to mingle in a way that they could have only dreamt of during Covid, others decide to give them a miss or go and positively hate the experience.  I was never a festival kid growing up. I didn't have the money, or the opportunity. As an adult, I've found them to be joyous events, but will always refuse to stay the night.  My girls have now both been to one of the key UK festivals, Reading, so I thought you might be interested to hear more about what to expect if your kids are keen to go, how best to plan ahead, and what the key issues turned out to be.   Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

    Reading Festival Advice From Teens: Vintage
4.8
out of 5
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About

Parenting teenagers often throws up questions we never thought we’d need to ask. Why is my teenager suddenly so angry? How much screen time is too much? Should I take their phone away at night? Why have they lost all motivation? What do I do about vaping, friendship problems, anxiety, parties, dating, exams… or a teenager who simply won’t talk to me? There’s a very good chance we’ve already talked about it on this podcast. Teenagers Untangled has a huge and growing library of episodes covering the questions, worries and challenges that come with raising tweens and teenagers. Rather than scrolling through hundreds of episodes trying to find the right one, use the search bar to search for what’s happening in your family right now. How to search: Simply type a keyword or short phrase into the search box. Try things like: anger • anxiety • phones • motivation • sleep • ADHD • vaping • alcohol • friendship • school • exams • lying • boundaries • consequences • social media • first love • university • leaving home You can also try different words if your first search doesn’t bring up exactly what you need. For example, if you’re worried about your teenager being rude, you might also search respect, anger, conflict or communication. The search will bring up relevant Teenagers Untangled episodes so you can go straight to the conversations that are most useful to you. Think of it as a parenting database, So don't feel you need to start with our newest episode — start with your question. And if I haven't covered your question yet, tell me. Some of my best episodes begin with a question from a parent just like you. Whatever stage you're at, you don't have to figure it all out from scratch. Chances are, we've already started untangling it. FEARLESS PARENTING: Most parenting advice tells you what to do. I help you see things differently. Fear tells us our teenager is lazy, rude, addicted or deliberately difficult. Wonder asks, What's really going on? What need, skill or fear might I be missing? When we replace fear with curiosity, we make better decisions, drop our judgement and start connecting, and raise young people who are more resilient, independent and emotionally healthy. Join thousands of parents each week as we learn to Fear Less. Wonder More. If this resonates with you, join me on SUBSTACK: For those of you who want to read my thoughts beyond the podcast, or who just want to help me feel like the pebbles I have dropped in the ocean of life are making a difference, why not join my paid community? You’ll get one-to-one support and printable PDF’s that give you the top tips from each podcast episode so you have your own little, bespoke manual. COMMUNITY: I’ll be offering regular extras, including tips and thoughts, that help you tune into what matters. NOTES: So many listeners say they have rewound the episodes to write down notes, well now there’s no need. Paid subscribers will have a weekly, downloadable, summary of the top tips from each episode, so you don’t have to take notes. Please let me know if there are any old episodes for which you’d like the notes. I’m very happy to supply them.

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