CLOSER with Rachel Lim

Rachel Lim
  • 4.0 (3)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated weekly

CLOSER with Rachel Lim is about the conversations beneath the surface. Rachel sits down with people who fascinate her to explore not just what they’ve done, but what has shaped who they are: the experiences, relationships, contradictions, failures, beliefs and questions that have made them who they are today. Alongside long-form conversations are personal reflections from Rachel on what she is learning, unlearning and seeing differently in her own life. There may not always be a clear answer.. but perhaps the point is to come away seeing someone differently, seeing ourselves differently, and feeling a little closer. To ourselves. To each other. To what matters.

  1. 20 Oct

    #62: Chloe Tong: Marriage First, Life Beyond Labels & Growing With Grab

    Chloe Tong opens up about the life behind the roles she is most known for: daughter, wife, mother of five, partner to Grab co-founder and CEO Anthony Tan, and now the work she is building through ACE Team Foundation. In this conversation, she shares how losing her mother young shaped the way she thinks about love and family, what boarding school taught her about independence, and how growing up gave her the freedom to be both ambitious and maternal. We go into the early days of her relationship with Anthony, why it began with deep respect before love, why she quit just two weeks after meeting him to build alongside him, the fights that shaped their marriage, and why they made the unconventional decision to put their marriage before their children. We also talk about motherhood, privilege, service, identity, the pressure of building a family in public, and what it means to create a home that feels steady even when life outside is not. At the heart of the conversation is a question Chloe is still living into: how do you build a life deeply intertwined with others while still becoming more fully yourself? Chapters 00:00:00 Getting to Know Chloe Tong 00:01:24 Growing Up with the Courage to Speak Up 00:03:42 Learning to Hold Love and Regret Together 00:05:18 Carrying Forward Unconditional Love 00:06:33 Finding Her Voice Away from Home 00:07:52 Knowing When Not to Rescue Your Child 00:09:51 Learning to See Her Mother More Fully 00:11:33 Why Children Don’t Always Need Equal 00:14:03 Wanting Both: Ambition and Motherhood 00:17:50 Meeting Anthony: A Relationship Built on Honesty 00:24:18 Building a Marriage Around Shared Values 00:26:27 Learning to Disagree Without Losing Respect 00:28:17 Choosing to Stay Through the Hard Things 00:31:33 Beyond Titles: Making Space for Every Version of Herself 00:34:12 What It Takes to Hold Family and Work Together 00:36:17 Building a Home That Feels Like Peace 00:38:43 Why Their Marriage Comes Before Their Children 00:44:03 Finding Purpose Through ACE Team Foundation 00:55:05 Building a Family Culture That Works for You 00:56:01 Finding Perspective Through Faith and Family 00:57:15 Who Is Chloe Beyond Everything She Does? 00:58:04 Learning to Put Ego Aside 01:01:52 When Purpose Calls You Beyond Yourself 01:03:25 What Her Mother Would Say Today Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Chloe Tong here: https://www.instagram.com/chloetong/ Follow CLOSER here: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/

    #62: Chloe Tong: Marriage First, Life Beyond Labels & Growing With Grab

  2. 6 Oct

    Raising Conscious Humans: Raising Children With an Inner Compass

    When do children stop trusting themselves? They start out asking why about everything. They know what they like. They challenge us. They follow their curiosity without wondering whether they’re doing it “right”. And then, somewhere along the way, many start looking outside themselves for the answers. In the 2nd episode of Raising Conscious Humans, I sit down again with Hwee Keng Maeder, mother of three boys, including Singapore’s youngest Olympic medallist, Max Maeder, to talk about how we protect that inner compass instead of slowly overriding it. She tells me, “You can’t want to raise a curious child that doesn’t challenge you. Then it’s not a curious child.” We talk about knowing when to step in and when not to rescue, including why she resisted bringing her youngest home from a summer camp in Greece even when he called every day asking to leave. We also talk about giving children real responsibility, letting them face consequences, and creating different “pockets” where they can build confidence and self-worth, so their whole identity doesn’t rest on our approval or how well they perform. And I share a moment with Ollie that made me realise how easily our children’s struggles can start to feel like a reflection of us. At the heart of it is one question: How do we raise children who can trust themselves? Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:02:00 Curious Child vs. Compliant Child 00:03:38 It’s Okay to Say, “Not Right Now” 00:04:49 Honouring the Child’s Agenda, Not Ours 00:08:52 How Good Intentions Can Kill Curiosity 00:11:47 Creating a Safe Space for Questions and Discernment 00:15:11 When to Sit With Discomfort Instead of Rescuing 00:19:11 “Is This for Them, or Is This for Me?” 00:23:21 When Our Child’s Struggle Feels Like Our Failure 00:27:45 Giving Children Space to Build Their Own Confidence 00:33:48 Letting Children Face Consequences 00:37:40 Raising Conscious Humans, Not Compliant Ones 00:39:01 The Mindset Shift That Changes How We Parent Follow CLOSER on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/ Follow Rachel here:  https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/

    Raising Conscious Humans: Raising Children With an Inner Compass

  3. 29 Sept

    #61: Dr. Ramani: The Signs of a Narcissistic Relationship & How Not to Lose Yourself

    The word narcissist gets thrown around a lot. But what does narcissism actually look like in a relationship, and what happens to us when we spend too long trying to manage someone else? In this episode of CLOSER, I sit down with clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Ramani Durvasula to unpack narcissism beyond the label: the subtle signs we often miss, why narcissistic people can be so charming to the outside world, and why the people closest to them can have a completely different experience. We talk about what it feels like to walk on eggshells, to second-guess what you say, to give endlessly but feel unsupported in return, and how, over time, you can begin silencing parts of yourself just to keep the peace. Dr. Ramani also shares why we cannot change another person's narcissism, what healthy boundaries and realistic expectations can look like, and why compassion for someone else should not require abandoning yourself. We explore healing, self-blame, healthy ego, social media, and how we can raise children with a stronger sense of who they are. One idea from this conversation stayed with me: more than one thing can be true at the same time. You can love someone and still be hurt by them. You can see the good in them and acknowledge that their behaviour may not change. And sometimes, healing begins with seeing the relationship for what it is, rather than continuing to believe that if we just love better, give more, or say the right thing, we can make it different. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:26 What Is Narcissism, Really? 00:03:57 Narcissism Is a Spectrum 00:06:12 How Dr. Ramani Recognised Narcissism in Her Own Life 00:08:42 What a Narcissistic Relationship Actually Feels Like 00:12:49 Is Social Media Fueling Narcissism? 00:15:16 How to Raise Children With a Strong Sense of Self 00:19:30 Can a Narcissist Actually Change? 00:21:26 How to Stop Blaming Yourself and Set Boundaries 00:24:36 The Biggest Myths About Narcissism 00:26:12 Healthy Ego vs. Narcissism 00:27:49 When Compassion Becomes Self-Abandonment 00:30:10 “It’s Not You” 00:32:04 Be Their Parent, Not Their Peer 00:35:53 What Dr. Ramani Wants You to Know About Narcissism Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/doctorramani?stkn=MWcxZXNwdng3YzZteA== Follow Dr. Ramani Durvasula here: https://doctor-ramani.com/

    #61: Dr. Ramani: The Signs of a Narcissistic Relationship & How Not to Lose Yourself

  4. 15 Sept

    Raising Conscious Humans: Raising the Child You Have, Not the Child You Want

    Hwee Keng said: “There is a personality in that small human being... you don’t know the settings. First, I think you need to find out the settings.” As parents, we spend so much energy shaping who we hope our children will become, and perhaps not enough time discovering who they already are. What struck me about Hwee Keng is how much of her parenting has been about unlearning her own expectations. She even caught herself once after feeling disappointed that Max didn’t win a competition, and realised some of that disappointment was about her own ego. That hit me. Because maybe the work is not raising the child we imagined, but learning to really see the child in front of us. In this episode, we talk about curiosity over performance, giving children real agency, the difference between “you’ve got this” and “we’ve got you,” responsibility, consequences, and what it means to raise children who are truly fit for life. Follow CLOSER on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closerwithrach/ Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/

    Raising Conscious Humans: Raising the Child You Have, Not the Child You Want

  5. 11 Aug

    #60: SG's Fastest Woman on What Success Never Taught Her

    Before Shanti Pereira became Singapore's fastest woman, before she made history on some of the world's biggest stages, she was a ten-year-old girl who lost a few races in primary school and wanted to quit. That's where we begin. Not with the medals, but with the moments most people never see. Losing both her scholarships within the same week at 22 and sharing, "It really felt like rejection." Getting injured in an Olympic year after achieving her dream of qualifying for Paris on merit, and wondering if she'd even make it to the start line. The unglamorous discipline of showing up on the days she didn't feel like it at all. What struck me most wasn't Shanti's list of achievements.. it was the way she spoke about identity. About learning not to tie her self-worth to success or failure. About protecting her peace. And about choosing, again and again, not to give up when things get hard. At the end of every season, whether it's been a good one or a difficult one, she asks herself: "Did I show up?" I think that's a question all of us need from time to time. I hope you'll enjoy this conversation with Shanti Pereira. Chapters 00:00:00 Meet Shanti Pereira: The Woman Behind Singapore’s Fastest Sprint 00:01:20 Growing Up in the Shadow of Track and Field 00:03:46 The Childhood Lesson That Changed Everything 00:05:27 Grounded Advice For Her Younger Self 00:06:54 Facing Rejection: Losing Two Scholarships in a Single Week 00:09:14 Defying Failure and Choosing Resilience 00:12:40 Managing Olympic Dreams Amidst Physical Injuries 00:18:09 Staying Grounded: Body Care, Aging, and Reconnecting With Her "Why" 00:20:23 Choosing Stillness Over Chaos at the Starting Line 00:25:12 Tuning Out Public Pressure to Protect Your Joy 00:27:56 How to Reset Your Mindset After a Bad Race 00:30:48 The Powerful Advice That Stayed With Her 00:31:33 Finding Her Identity Beyond Winning and Losing 00:34:23 The Unseen Work and Human Side of Elite Performance 00:36:17 Choosing Consistency and Building Unshakable Habits 00:37:36 Shanti Pereira’s Definition of a Champion 00:39:19 Inspiring the Next Generation of Athletes 00:40:13 Sacrificing Her 20s: Choosing a Different Path Without Regret 00:41:23 Entering a Milestone Decade and Looking Toward Her Next Era 00:43:35 Shanti Pereira’s Recovery Rituals and Wellness Staples 00:45:18 The Message She Hopes to Leave Behind 00:46:05 Staying True to Herself Beyond the Spotlight 00:46:41 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Shanti Pereira here: https://www.instagram.com/vshantipereira/

    #60: SG's Fastest Woman on What Success Never Taught Her

  6. 22 Jul

    #59: What Success Never Prepared Me For with Ingck

    Most people know Ing as the founder of INGU - the skincare brand that sold out 30,000 units in three minutes with zero advertising. The trusted voice who built a community of millions by doing the one thing his industry often punishes: telling the truth. But this conversation isn't really about skincare.. it's about what happens after you build something people believe in. The weight of carrying other people's trust. The loneliness of being misunderstood. The panic attacks that made him think he was dying. The goodbye video he filmed, edited, and still hasn't had the courage to post. For the first time, Ing shares what was happening behind the scenes during one of the biggest seasons of his life, and how it changed the way he thinks about ambition, happiness and success itself. We also talk about the person who answered the phone from a surgery room when Ing thought he was going to die on the floor of a café, and why that relationship ultimately reshaped his definition of what really matters. I left this conversation seeing success a little differently. I hope you do too. Follow Rachel here:  https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow Ing here: https://www.instagram.com/ingck/ Follow Ingu Skin here: https://www.instagram.com/inguskin/

    #59: What Success Never Prepared Me For with Ingck

  7. 1 Jul

    #58: What If Your Next Chapter Is Bigger Than You've Imagined?

    You don't need a crisis to enter a new chapter. Sometimes life is moving along just fine. And yet, you find yourself carrying questions you can't quite shake. This conversation feels especially meaningful to me. Three years ago, Bill Burnett helped shape one of the biggest chapters of my life. Today, I'm returning to his work because the questions I'm asking have changed, and I need that space again. Together, we explore why so many of us feel there's "something more," why life was never meant to be a straight line, and how creating the time, space, and structure to think differently can help us navigate what's next with greater clarity, intention, and possibility. If this conversation resonates with you, Bill and I will be hosting a special CLOSER experience in Singapore on 25th July. We'd love for you to join us as we explore what your next chapter could become. Sing up for CLOSER x Bill Burnett here: https://tinyurl.com/5n7dkdrb Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Visit Bill Burnett’s website here: https://designingyour.life/ Read ‘Designing Your Life’ here: https://designingyour.life/books-designing-life-original-book/

    #58: What If Your Next Chapter Is Bigger Than You've Imagined?

  8. 16 Jun

    #57: What 'Kiasu' Culture Is Really Costing Us with Teo You Yenn

    Most of us have been taught that the pressure Singaporean parents feel is a mindset problem. That we just need to relax. Stop being so kiasu. The data tells a completely different story. Associate Professor Teo You Yenn spent three years interviewing 92 Singaporean parents across every class background for her new book Unease; and what she found will reframe how you see your own life. Not just parenting. The whole thing. She makes the case that the exhaustion, the anxiety, the feeling that you're doing everything right and still something is off.. none of it is personal. It's structural. And until we understand that distinction, nothing changes. We talked about: Why "kiasu" is not a cultural trait; and what it actually is What it means that most parents describe their child as a problem to solve Why Singapore's falling birth rate isn't a fertility problem - it's a conditions-for-family-life problem The three quiet costs to our society that nobody is talking about What the opposite of unease actually is (it's not ease) What stayed with me long after we stopped recording: the way we're living is shaping who we're becoming. As individuals, as parents, as a society. And we haven't stopped to ask if this is who we want to be. Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:36 Meet You Yenn: Exposing the Contradiction of Singaporean Success 00:04:02 Defining “Unease”: The Quiet Struggle of Helplessness in Singapore 00:05:45 Why “Kiasu Mentality” is Too Simple an Excuse 00:07:33 How the System Conditions Singaporeans to Run the Race 00:10:48 The Painful Cost of Losing Agency 00:12:00 Returning to the Original Dream of Prosperity in Singapore 00:14:30 Seeing Our Children Through the Lens of Problems 00:16:49 Reevaluating Our Values Across Class Lines 00:20:48 The Unequal Weight of Motherhood 00:23:42 What Does a “Pro-Family” Society Look Like? 00:25:43 Singapore’s Low TFR: A Fertility Problem or a Family Life Problem? 00:28:01 Singapore’s Obsession with Finding “Top Talents” 00:32:29 Shifting the Narrow Definition of “Family” in Singapore 00:34:17 Writing for a Historian 50 Years from Now 00:36:10 Finding Hope in a Shared Public Resonance 00:39:15 Final Reflections Follow Rachel here: https://www.instagram.com/ms_rach/ Follow You Yenn’s updates here: https://www.instagram.com/ethosbooks/ Purchase ‘Unease: Life in Singapore Families’ here: https://www.ethosbooks.com.sg/products/unease-life-in-singapore-families Write in to the team at hello@rachreflects.com

    #57: What 'Kiasu' Culture Is Really Costing Us with Teo You Yenn
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Ratings & Reviews

4
out of 5
3 Ratings

About

CLOSER with Rachel Lim is about the conversations beneath the surface. Rachel sits down with people who fascinate her to explore not just what they’ve done, but what has shaped who they are: the experiences, relationships, contradictions, failures, beliefs and questions that have made them who they are today. Alongside long-form conversations are personal reflections from Rachel on what she is learning, unlearning and seeing differently in her own life. There may not always be a clear answer.. but perhaps the point is to come away seeing someone differently, seeing ourselves differently, and feeling a little closer. To ourselves. To each other. To what matters.

Information

  • Creator
    Rachel Lim
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    86
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Rachel Lim
  • Show Website
    CLOSER with Rachel Lim

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