Surviving BPD Relationship Breakups

A.J. Mahari
  • 3.6 (14)
  • Mental Health

A.J. Mahari is a Counselor and Trauma Recovery Coach who has 35 years experience working with people surviving Borderline Personality Relationship Breakups in all relationship types, healing from codependency, Inner Child Healing, Family of Origin and Self Differentiation. A.J. also works with people surviving a Narcissistic Relationship Breakup or Co-Monbidly both BPD/NPD Breakup and Narcissistic Abuse Recovery and much more.  https://ajmahari.ca/sessions https://ajmahari.ca/gottatalk - After Hours https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts https://survivngbpdbreakup.com https://survivingaborderline.com https://codependency.ca

  1. 12 hr ago

    BPD Ex’s What is The Pathway To Healing and What Is Not.

    BPD Exws What is The Pathway To Healing and What Is Not? BPD Exes what is the pathway to healing? It is not merely researching and "understanding" Borderline Personality Disorder. That canactually become a block to your healing and recovery process. In response to a commenter who is so lost, I talk about what isn't helpful when one has decided or knows they need to heal and recovery from a BPD toxic relationships and Codependency. I respond to a commenter who is really in a no-win place of unhealthy thinking "married" to being a "poor victim" of a person with VPD. Despite th e reality that people with (especially) untreate4d BPD hurt, abuse, use, and traumatize others, it's not helpful to stay in a "poor victim mentality" even though you have been victimized.  https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - One-to-one private sessions https://ajmahari.com - Online Store

    BPD Ex’s What is The Pathway To Healing and What Is Not.

  2. 16 Aug

    In BPD Relationships Do Codependents Over Function

    Do Codependents over-function in BPD relationships or emotionally, in life, generally? The odd person/professional out there claims, yes, that's what's going on. No, it's not what is going on for anyone with Codependency. People with Codependency are not "over-functioning" they are under-functioning and dysfunctioning. People with Codependency have (from childhood woundedness, or adverse experience) an unhealthy and dysfunctional relationship to and with self. That is why people with Codependency are trying so hard to control the Borderline, to change him or her to rescue, to fix, to get back to who the fantasy bond of BPD initial idealization convinced you that he/she was. People with Codependency need their own therapy to heal what is largely in the unconscious and being repeated with a person with BPD. It's not all about the Borderline. Self=abandoning yourself, not being able to love yourself and lacking emotional and other boundaries cannot be "Over Functioning" and there is not such thing as a High-Functioning Codependent because that's not an accurate descriptor within the lens of what Codependency is at all. People with BPD (untreated -not clinically shown to have recovered) aren't who you thought they were. You can't change that. You can't wait around for them to do the 10+ years real BPD recovery requires.  https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Blog https://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & more https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcasts & Blog

  3. 10 May

    BPD Joint Therapy Fantasy BPD Right Fighting Pathological Lying vs Your Eggshell Walking

    BPD Joint Therapy Fantasy BPD Right-Fighting & Pathological Lying vs Your Eggshell-Walking BPD joint therapy doesn’t work and is a fantasy bonded nightmare of Borderline victim/martyr cs your Codependent walking on eggshells and trauma bond addiction to intermittent reinforcement. Borderlines - unless clinically proven to actually be recovered need their own therapy and you need yours. BPD relationships without full BPD recovery are toxic and you’re not being “loved” while being abused. BPD right-fighting and pathological lying block anything meaningful in joint therapy as they control  the process initiating BPD Induced Conversation and projecting on to the therapist as they do you in life.  Stop trying to recycle toxic relationships after the first breakup! https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions with A.J. https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts https://ajmahari.com - Online Store 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the topThis podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:  100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Million Podcasats: https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

  4. 8 Apr

    BPD Negative Behavior - Don’t Confront It - What Can You Do_

    BPD Negative Behavior - Don’t Confront It - What Can You Do? BPD Negative Behavior - You can’t confront it. You may have unsuccessfully tried endless times. It increases your suffering each time, but to not say anything will increase your suffering as well. This is the heart of BPD toxic relationships wherein you just cannot win. What can you actually do? What you can do is admit your are powerless over the person with BPD. So, then what in the middle of no win relationship impossibility? https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions with A.J. https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts https://ajmahari.com - Online Store This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at: 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Podcast lists. https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

  5. 5 Apr

    High Functioning Borderlines in Careers vs Relationships

    High Functioning BPD in Careers vs Relationships How can a person diagnosed with BPD and with many active Borderline traits, behaviour etc in a relationship possibly function in careers, and often be or be becoming Social Workers and Psychologists? The core reason is the vast difference in many with high functioning BPD having a high IQ in the absence of emotional relational intelligence. They remain, often, toxic in interpersonal relationships despite functioning (to various degrees) in careers or professions. People with a degree in Social Work or Psychology are not going to be able to help themselves due to lack/loss of “self” and lacking emotional intelligence and lacking emotional maturity and so much more This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at: 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Podcast lists. https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

  6. 28 Feb

    Co-Parenting or Paralell Parenting With a BPD Ex - Another RollerCoaster

    Co-Pareting or Parallel Parenting With a BPD Ex - Another RollerCoaster Co-Parenting or Parallel parenting with a BPD - Borderline Personality Disordered Ex is for so many people, a nightmare. Not all BPD parents are the same, but, many, many of them are untreated,competitive, need their child or children's love and validation in such an unhealthy way that their need for a child or children's "loyalty" "never abandon me" drives so many Borderline Mothers and Borderline fathers to alienate you from you child or children. Co-parenting efforts on the part of your BPD Ex may well be so full of high-conflict and many a parent with BPD cannot put their child's needs ahead of their own. If the BPD Ex still blames you for everything they deem that was "wrong" with the relationship they carry on believing that you shouldn't have any rightsto "their child". For many Co-parenting will end up more being Parallel parenting. Either way you need to have done your healing work to be able to stay calm, to be non-reactive to the BPD Ex and to only communicate facts about what your child needs.  Co-parenting, for many, not all, with a BPD Ex just become another somewhat different but very familiar rollercoaster experience that you need to learn how to strategize to cope with while giving your child emotional safety and love and as healthy of a life as you can during your custody or visitation. As conflict-laden as most of these situations are it is really not going to be any better for you or your child or children to try to stay in a toxic BPD relationship hoping that will help your child or children. Sadly, they are going to be wounded in childhood.  https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at: 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Podcast lists. https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

  7. 3 Feb

    BPD Sudden Discard of Monkey Branching Crushed Future

    BPD Sudden Discard of Monkey Branching Crushed Future Many people who have been in short term or long term relationships with someone with Borderline Personality Disorder experience a BPD sudden discard of monkey branching that just crushes you and all the future plans that you believed were going to be your life unfolding in the relationship with the person with BPD that you didn't know, you didn't truly know. The heartbreak, the loss, the shame, the toxic guilt of people with Codependency who for a time blame themselves. BPD sudden Monkey Branching discards add even more pain and confusion to what is experienced in any BPD Breakup. How can you recover from this? https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at: 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Podcast lists. https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

  8. 18 Jan

    The Glass Borderline "H*mpty D*mpty" No Real Self

    The Glass Borderline 'H*mpty D*mpty' No Real Self  BPD Breakups and Codependent BPD Exes endless "what if's' in the confusion, losing of yourself, the rumination, the cognitive dissonance and the constant "how could he/she do this?" "What did I do wrong?" If only I would/could have had ___________ or done _________ or said ____________ or not done or said ____________ All these 'what if's' when you really need to understand the Glass Borderline 'H*mpty D*mpty and why your relationship will not, was not, did not and still cannot work out. https://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessions https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcasts https://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soon https://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my Youtube This podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at: 100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025 Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts, the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic Relationship Podcast lists. https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/ https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/

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3.6
out of 5
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About

A.J. Mahari is a Counselor and Trauma Recovery Coach who has 35 years experience working with people surviving Borderline Personality Relationship Breakups in all relationship types, healing from codependency, Inner Child Healing, Family of Origin and Self Differentiation. A.J. also works with people surviving a Narcissistic Relationship Breakup or Co-Monbidly both BPD/NPD Breakup and Narcissistic Abuse Recovery and much more.  https://ajmahari.ca/sessions https://ajmahari.ca/gottatalk - After Hours https://ajmahari.ca/podcasts https://survivngbpdbreakup.com https://survivingaborderline.com https://codependency.ca

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