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  • Good Inside with Dr. Becky
    Good Inside with Dr. Becky

    1

    Good Inside with Dr. Becky

    Dr. Becky Kennedy

  • Makes Milk with Emma Pickett: breastfeeding from the beginning to the end
    Makes Milk with Emma Pickett: breastfeeding from the beginning to the end

    2

    Makes Milk with Emma Pickett: breastfeeding from the beginning to the end

    Emma Pickett - Board Certified Lactation Consultant

  • The Montessori Notebook podcast :: a Montessori parenting podcast with Simone Davies
    The Montessori Notebook podcast :: a Montessori parenting podcast with Simone Davies

    3

    The Montessori Notebook podcast :: a Montessori parenting podcast with Simone Davies

    Simone Davies, Montessori teacher and parent

  • The Curious Parent
    The Curious Parent

    4

    The Curious Parent

    Harpreet S Grover

  • Meditation Mama | Guided Meditations for Pregnancy, Labor & Postpartum
    Meditation Mama | Guided Meditations for Pregnancy, Labor & Postpartum

    5

    Meditation Mama | Guided Meditations for Pregnancy, Labor & Postpartum

    Kelly Smith

  • Middle School Mary Poppins
    Middle School Mary Poppins

    6

    Middle School Mary Poppins

    Suzanne M. Swain, EDS LMSW

  • Birth with Babylist
    Birth with Babylist

    7

    Birth with Babylist

    Babylist

Essentials

  • Motherhood in Black & White
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Updated weekly

  • The Longest Shortest Time
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Updated weekly

  • Explicit, Care and Feeding | Slate's parenting show
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Updated twice weekly

  • Dumb Dad Podcast
    Comedy
    Comedy

    Updated weekly

  • Explicit, COOL MOMS
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Every two weeks

  • Is It Normal? The Pregnancy Podcast With Jessie Ware
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Weekly series

  • Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled
    Parenting
    Parenting

    Updated weekly

  • What We Learn About Love Before We’re 10 (How We're Raised with Will Guidara)

    3 MAR

    1

    What We Learn About Love Before We’re 10 (How We're Raised with Will Guidara)

    This episode is part of our new series, How We’re Raised — conversations about how the homes we grew up in shape the way we lead, love, and parent today. Dr. Becky sits down with restaurateur and author Will Guidara to explore how being deeply seen as a child shaped the way he builds culture — in restaurants and at home.Will shares what it was like growing up with a mother who became quadriplegic after brain cancer, the quiet power of full presence, and how those early experiences led him to build a career around “unreasonable hospitality” — not in pursuit of product, but in pursuit of people.Together, they talk about: Why feeling seen matters more than being impressive The gift — and cost — of being the person who cares for everyone Why holding your child can matter more than fixing their problem And how to bring more intention into your home life Get the Good Inside App by Dr. Becky: https://bit.ly/4fSxbzk Your Good Inside membership might be eligible for HSA/FSA reimbursement! To learn more about how to get your membership reimbursed, check out the link here: https://www.goodinside.com/fsa-hsa-eligibility/ Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter For a full transcript of the episode, go to goodinside.com/podcast. Thank you to our partners for making this episode of Good Inside possible!  -Care.com: For a limited time, you can use the code GOOD35 to save 35% on a Care.com Premium Membership.*  -Airbnb: If you’re ready to host but want some support, find a co-host at airbnb.com/host.  -Skylight: Get $30 off a 15-inch Skylight Calendar at myskylight.com/becky. -Hiya: Use the code DRBECKY for 50% off your first order. *Offer applies to initial term of Care.com membership subscriptions. Not applicable to add-on features or non-renewing access fees or services. Expires 4/26/26. Care.com does not employ or place any caregiver. Background checks are an important start, but they have limits. Visit www.care.com/safety. Order your copy of Leave Me Alone!, Dr. Becky’s new picture book about Deeply Feeling Kids. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    3 Mar

    •
    40 min
  • Episode 345 Rachel's VBAC After the Unexpected + Back Labor + Strategies for Improving Your VBAC Chances After a Complicated Birth

    21/10/2024

    2

    Episode 345 Rachel's VBAC After the Unexpected + Back Labor + Strategies for Improving Your VBAC Chances After a Complicated Birth

    Rachel is a professor, an author, and a VBAC mom who is here to share her story from a traumatic C-section birth through a VBAC. This episode really dives deep into how picking the right provider is key to improving your chances for a VBAC. They give practical questions to ask your providers, more than just yes or no, to really get to know their birth philosophy and what qualifications and experiences your provider might have that would make them a better fit for VBAC chances.  Rachel and Meagan also give a lot of validation and advice on how to start the process of overcoming birth trauma; it’s reality and to not be ashamed of it. You’re not alone.   Through the many important messages of this episode, they both mention many times to trust your intuition. If something feels off, listen to that. And if a change in provider is necessary…it is never ever too late to change.  Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of the Cesarean Section How to Naturally Induce Labor How to Turn Prodromal Labor into Active Labor Membrane Sweeps for VBAC How to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for Parents Full Transcript under Episode Details  Meagan: Hello everybody! Welcome to the show! I am so honored to have Rachel Somerstein on with us today. She is a friend of ours from New York. She is a writer and an associate professor of journalism at SUNY New Paltz. She is an author of Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of the Cesarean Section.  And her writing has also appeared in the Boston Globe, The Guardian, The Washington Post, and Women’s Health. She lives in Hudson Valley, NY with her husband and her two children and is here to share her stories with you today.  Rachel had an unplanned Xesarean section with her first child and the experience was anything but routine. I know that there are many of us who have been through this journey and on this podcast, maybe listening today, that also had an unexpected experience and it may have left us with trauma, or doubt, or fear, or all the feelings, right? And so she is going to be talking to us today about her experiences, but then also we’re going to talk about some guidance on how to find peace and to offer ourselves grace and to set ourselves up for a much better experience next time.  We do have a review of the week, so I want to get into that and I’m going to turn the time over to Rachel. This review is by Deserie Jacobsen. The review title is “Thank You.” She actually emailed this in and it says, “This podcast and parents course is amazing. I am not a VBAC mom, but I have been listening since 2020. I binge listen near the end of every pregnancy to remind me of everything I need to remember in birth and process through my previous births. This time around I felt more prepared than ever before, having plans in place just in case. We were able to have a quick birth of my 5th baby. I love the education, passion, and love this podcast gives. I recommend it to everyone I know, and I have learned so much from it. I am so grateful for this podcast, thank you.” Thank you so much Deserie for your review! Seriously you guys, I just love hearing that people are finding the information that they need, they’re finding community, they’re finding that they can do this too. Just like them, and all these reviewers and all the people that have shared their stories and all these reviewers you guys can too. This birth, VBAC, is possible too. Better experience is possible. A healing CBAC; it’s possible. You guys, all it takes is getting the information, the prep, finding the provider, to have a better experience. Meagan: Alright Ms. Rachel, welcome to the show and thank you again so much for being here with us. I kind of talked about this a little bit before we started recording about how I think your episode is going to be so powerful and deep and raw too. You’ve got these feelings and these words. I love it. I love reading your book and I can’t wait to hear it from your own mouth. Which speaking of book, can we talk about that a little bit? What kind of just inspired you, jumpstarted you into writing a book about this? Rachel: Well, I’m a writer. And I wrote an essay about my birth about two years after I had my baby, my first birth, my C-section. And I realized I had a lot more to say and also I heard from a lot of moms when that came out and that made me start thinking that I think there was a bigger project.  Meagan: Absolutely. And an amazing project that you completed. Rachel: Yes. Meagan: And remind everybody before we get into your stories where they can find your book. I actually have it here in my hands. It’s Invisible Labor. So where all can they find that? And we’ll make sure that we link it.  Rachel: Sure, thank you! Yeah, so it’s Invisible Labor: The Untold Story of The Cesarean Section. And you can get it on Amazon, you can get it from Barnes and Noble, you can get it from your local bookstore, you can get it as an audiobook? Or you can also get it as an ebook. Meagan: For the audiobook, did you record it? Rachel: I did not. The narrator is Xe Sands and she did a great, great job. It sounds excellent.  Meagan: Awesome. We’ll be sure to link that. I think it’s definitely a book that everyone should check out. There's a lot of power in that book. Rachel: Thank you. Meagan: And it’s not even just your story. I mean there’s a ton. Like if you go through the note section there’s a ton of research in there, and history and studies, and so many really great things. Well okay, let’s hear about the story that started the inspiration and behind this amazing book. Rachel: Sure! Thank you. So like so many moms, I had an unplanned C-section that I was completely unprepared for, which is another reason I wanted to write this book because I think a lot of people go into pregnancy just assuming they’re going to have a vaginal birth and like me, I didn’t even read the parts of the books about C-sections, I skipped them. Because I was not going to have a C-section. Which is whatever, hindsight is everything, right?  But I had a totally textbook pregnancy. I switched to a different group of midwives and OB’s about halfway through because I just didn’t have a connection I felt with the providers in the first one. And frankly, I didn’t have a connection with the providers in the second one either, but by that point, I was like well whatever, it’s fine. Which I think is actually, if I could go back and do it again I would have changed that. But you kind of are like, I don’t want to, could I possibly change again? And I think that for people who are VBACing, yes you can and sometimes you actually really need to, even like late on in your pregnancy, people will switch groups or providers even late in the third trimester, so.  Meagan: Even if you’re changed already, you can do it multiple times. Rachel: Exactly. Meagan: It’s not a bad thing to find the right provider for you. It’s not.  Rachel: It’s not. And It's hard. And you can feel like, Oh my god. Am I really going to send all my records over? It can feel like so much effort and it can really be worth it. I just wanted to say that as someone who switched once and then was like, Okay, I’m done, and wished I’d switched again.  So anyways, it was late in week 39 I went into prodromal labor but I didn’t know that prodromal labor even existed because nobody told me about it.  And it was my first baby. So I was like is this labor? I think I’m having contractions, these are not Braxton Hicks. And in the end, we talked to the doula I was working with, and in the end they ended up petering out. And at that, I think that that for me marked the beginning of, this is not going to look like the way I had expected it to look.  And again, hindsight is everything. What I wish I had known at the time– and I think this is really relevant to some VBAC moms is that sometimes prodromal labor means that your baby is not in the best position for having a vaginal birth. And I can’t exactly say oh I would have done this or that differently if I’d known it, but it would have helped me understand what I was going into with the labor and the birth.  So anyway, I eventually went into labor in the middle of the night. It was exactly my due date and I knew it was different. I could just feel this is labor. And I was really eager to get it going quickly. And again, I wish someone would have said, “Rachel, rest. It’s early. You’re going to need your strength. You’re going to need your energy however your baby is born.” And instead I quite literally was running up and down the stairs of my house to try to push labor along. Which is, I have compassion for myself, I understand why I was doing that. What I really needed to do was get in the bath, or I don’t know, lay over the birth ball. Watch a silly movie, right? The feelings I was having were real pain and I was scared. But you kind of can’t run through this, especially a first labor as we all know, those take a long time, right? Meagan: Yeah. And if we were having prodromal labor, our body may be kicking into labor, but still might need some time to help that baby rotate and change positions.  Rachel: Exactly, exactly. And this is the kind of education that is so missing from birth classes. And that is one reason why this kind of podcast is so helpful because that’s how I learned about these different things. I didn’t ever learn about them from a provider being like, “Let’s talk about what will happen in your birth, and let’s talk about why you had prodromal labor.” So anyway, we went to the doctors office where we met a midwife and my doula for a labor check. And I was hardly dilated, I was at a 2 but I was in extreme pain. And I have to say, I have a very, very high pain tolerance and I now know I was having back labor.  Meagan: Baby’s position. Rachel: Exactly. And the contracti

    21/10/2024

    •
    1h 30m
  • [Parenting Challenging Kids Series] Parenting Your "Spicy" Kid - Mary Van Geffen

    3 MAR

    3

    [Parenting Challenging Kids Series] Parenting Your "Spicy" Kid - Mary Van Geffen

    In this episode of the Mindful Mama Podcast, I talk with Mary Van Geffen, parenting coach and mom, about what it means to parent a “Spicy One” — children who are strong-willed, deeply feeling, and emotionally intense. Mary shares practical strategies for staying calm, kind, and firm, setting limits without breaking a child’s spirit, and protecting parents and siblings from burnout. She also explores how parenting a Spicy One transforms the parent, why traditional approaches often backfire, and ways to focus on delighting in your child while cultivating connection and self-regulation. In this episode, you’ll learn: How to recognize if your child is a Spicy One Why traditional parenting techniques often backfire Practical tools for managing meltdowns and aggression How to discipline without turning into the “mean mom” Ways to protect siblings and prevent parental burnout The importance of self-regulation and delighting in your child ABOUT HUNTER CLARKE-FIELDS: Hunter Clarke-Fields is the host Mindful Parenting Podcast (Top 0.5% podcast ), global speaker, number 1 bestselling author of “Raising Good Humans” and “Raising Good Humans Every Day,” Mindfulness Meditation teacher and creator of the Mindful Parenting Course and Teacher Training. Find more podcasts, Hunter’s books, blog posts, free resources, and more at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠MindfulMamaMentor.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Discover your Unique-To-You Podcast Playlist at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mindfulmamamentor.com/quiz/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠/mindfulmamamentor.com/mindful-mama-podcast-sponsors/⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    3 Mar

    •
    49 min
  • RAR #277: Inspiring Heroic Virtue in Our Kids

    19 FEB

    4

    RAR #277: Inspiring Heroic Virtue in Our Kids

    We talk a lot around here about the incredible impact stories have on our kids. They build empathy and connection, letting us walk a mile in another’s shoes. And some stories also help us see what it looks like to be brave and courageous, even in the face of fear or daunting challenges. Today, Audrey is back to talk with me about how stories inspire courage in our kids and ourselves and can connect us to profound truths, no matter how fantastical the setting. In this episode, you’ll hear:  How stories become companions to us through challenging seasons Which stories have shaped Sarah and Audrey’s own lives The ways myths can echo profound truths to us that feed our hearts and minds and inspire heroic virtue Learn more about Sarah Mackenzie: Read-Aloud RevivalWaxwing BooksSubscribe to the NewsletterFind the rest of the show notes at: readaloudrevival.com/inspiring-heroic-virtue

    19 Feb

    •
    36 min
  • Pregnancy, Postpartum and Writing Through the Motherhood Transformation with Jess Urlichs | Episode 42

    1 DAY AGO

    5

    Pregnancy, Postpartum and Writing Through the Motherhood Transformation with Jess Urlichs | Episode 42

    I’m super excited to share my chat with Jess Urlichs - she's an incredible poet and author from New Zealand, mom of three, and her words have had me and so many other mamas out there feel seen and understood. We've "known" each other through the online world for years, and getting to dive deep with her felt like catching up with an old friend. We talked about the wild ride of motherhood - the loneliness that can creep in after the newborn haze, those hard moments like struggling with breastfeeding or deciding to grow your family, and the seasons we go through as our kiddos grow. Jess shared how writing became her therapy, turning those highs and lows into poetry that just hits you right in the feels, reminding us it's okay to not have it all together amid the chaos. Jess opened up about setting boundaries with sharing her kids' stories online, and how her books (seriously, she's got like 17, including the new "They Bloom Because of You" that's all about those evolving mom seasons) help us feel seen and less alone. It was such a vulnerable, heartwarming convo that left me teary-eyed and inspired - if you're a mom navigating the mess and magic, this one's for you! More from Jess Urlichs: Visit JessUrlichs.com for her books and more! Follow her on Instagram: @jessurlichs Helpful Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome Jess Urlichs04:19 Finding a Village Online09:03 Hold the Mother Too13:31 Jess’ Feeding Journey16:05 The Myth of ‘Perfect Motherhood’18:58 Deciding on a Third Baby21:46 Postpartum Seasons Shift26:17 Kids Growing Independence32:25 Content Creation Pressure34:08 New Book and Wrap Up About your host: 🩺🤰🏻Lo Mansfield, MSN, RNC-OB, CLC is a registered nurse, mama of 4, and a birth, baby, and motherhood enthusiast. She is both the host of the Lo & Behold podcast and the founder of The Labor Mama. For more education, support and “me too” from Lo, please visit her website and check out her online courses and digital guides for birth, breastfeeding, and postpartum/newborns. You can also follow @thelabormama and @loandbehold_thepodcast on Instagram and join her email list here. For more pregnancy, birth, postpartum and motherhood conversation each week, be sure to subscribe to The Lo & Behold podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you prefer to listen! 👉🏼 A request: If this episode meant something to you, would you consider a 5 star rating and leaving us a review? Yes, we read them, and yes, they help keep L & B going! ♥️ Connect with Lo more on: INSTAGRAM | TIK TOK | PINTEREST | FACEBOOK Disclaimer Opinions shared by guests of this show are their own, and do not always reflect those of The Labor Mama platform. Additionally, the information you hear on this podcast or that you receive via any linked resources should not be considered medical advice. Please see our full disclaimer here. Additionally, we may make a small commission from some of the links shared with you. Please know, this comes at no additional cost to you, supports our small biz, and is a way for us to share brands and products with you that we genuinely love. Produced and Edited by Vaden Podcast Services Mentioned in this episode: YBYB 20% off ad link

    1 day ago

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    40 min
  • The 3 Power Struggles You Can't Win (And What to Do Instead) | 74

    21 JAN

    6

    The 3 Power Struggles You Can't Win (And What to Do Instead) | 74

    Try my free 7-day trial of TMP Times: https://www.themompsychologist.com/tmptimes You cannot force food down a child's throat. You cannot force pee into a potty. You cannot force a brain to fall asleep. If you're fighting these battles every single day, you're fighting battles you can never win and it's making everything worse. In this episode, I break down the 3 power struggles you'll never win (food, potty training, sleep), introduce the Division of Responsibility framework that removes the battle entirely, and give you exact scripts for dinner refusals, bedtime stalling, and morning routine resistance. You'll learn the difference between controlling their body (which creates psychological reactance) vs. controlling the environment (which actually works). Scripts for What You CAN Control FOR FOOD BATTLES: When they refuse dinner: "This is what we have for dinner. Eat what you want from your plate. When dinner's over, we'll have a small dessert." When they demand dessert without eating: "Dessert is part of our meal. Here's your portion. Still hungry after? More dinner is available." When they say "I don't like this": "Okay, you don't have to eat that. What else on your plate would you like to try?" When they haven't eaten much all day: "I notice you haven't eaten much today. Your body might be feeling hungry. Here's what we have. Take what you'd like." FOR BEDTIME BATTLES: When they won't stay in bed: "I see you're not sleepy yet. Time for your body to rest though. You can look at books or play quietly in bed." When they keep asking for "one more" thing: "Last call - need anything before I go? Water? Hug? Okay, that's it. I'm going to rest too now." When they stall at bedtime: "Teeth brushing time. You can do it yourself or I can help. What works for you?"

    21 Jan

    •
    20 min
  • My Number One Job as a Parent Is Not to Make You Happy

    14 HR AGO

    7

    My Number One Job as a Parent Is Not to Make You Happy

    Everyone in a family has a job. As parents, it’s our job to hold boundaries with our kids. It’s also our job to validate their feelings. And boy do they have feelings when we say no. On today’s episode, Dr. Becky explores the reasons behind why so many parents struggle with saying no to their kids and provides some new strategies you can start using in your house today. Get the Good Inside App by Dr. Becky: https://bit.ly/4fSxbzk Your Good Inside membership might be eligible for HSA/FSA reimbursement! To learn more about how to get your membership reimbursed, check out the link here: https://www.goodinside.com/fsa-hsa-eligibility/ Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter For a full transcript of the episode, go to goodinside.com/podcast. Thank you to our partners for making this episode of Good Inside possible! Airbnb: If you’re ready to host but want some support, find a co-host at airbnb.com/host. SmartyPants: Shop on Amazon, or at Target or Walmart today. Care.com: For a limited time, you can use the code GOOD35 to save 35% on a Care.com Premium Membership.* *Offer applies to initial term of Care.com membership subscriptions. Not applicable to add-on features or non-renewing access fees or services. Expires 4/26/26. Care.com does not employ or place any caregiver. Background checks are an important start, but they have limits. Visit www.care.com/safety. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    14 hr ago

    •
    33 min
  • Screen Time Solutions from the AAP's Leading Experts on Kids, Screens & Social Media

    1 DAY AGO

    8

    Screen Time Solutions from the AAP's Leading Experts on Kids, Screens & Social Media

    What are the risks of regularly handing an upset child a screen to soothe them? How can we help younger kids handle their big emotions related to screen time rules? How can you get evidence-based answers to any screen time question, straight from the AAP? Dr. Ruston speaks with pediatricians and researchers Dr. Megan Moreno and Dr. Jenny Radesky, who helped launch and now oversee the American Academy of Pediatrics' Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health. Dr. Moreno is a professor of pediatrics at the University of Wisconsin–Madison and co-medical director of the center. Dr. Radesky is an associate professor of pediatrics at the University of Michigan Medical School and director of the Division of Developmental Behavioral Pediatrics. Together, they share their research and insights on children, screens, and how families can get trusted guidance from the American Academy of Pediatrics.   Featured Experts Megan Moreno, MD Jenny Radesky, MD   Resources The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) Center of Excellence  on Social Media and Youth Mental Health The AAP's Family Media Plan Tool   ‍Additional Resources Screenagers Website Bring Screenagers to Your Community   Time Code 00:00 Meet the Experts 00:28 Megan's Early Social Media Cases 01:36 Jenny's Relational Health Lens 02:33 Screens as Regulation Research 04:50 Calm Without the iPad 08:14 AAP Family Media Plan 10:48 Problem Solving With Fast Tech 13:24 Key Rules for Teens 16:19 Content Choices for Little Kids

    1 day ago

    •
    21 min
  • 1KHO 709: Play Is Practice for the Future | Lauren and Mia Sundstrom, National Institute for Play

    13 FEB

    9

    1KHO 709: Play Is Practice for the Future | Lauren and Mia Sundstrom, National Institute for Play

    Play isn’t a break from learning — it is learning. In this powerful conversation with Lauren and Mia Sundstrom — daughter and granddaughter of renowned play researcher Dr. Stuart Brown — we explore why play is practice for the future in a world that feels increasingly uncertain. From rough-and-tumble childhood experiences to teenage burnout, adult loneliness, brain health, and even leadership, this episode makes a compelling case that unstructured, self-directed play builds resilience, creativity, emotional regulation, and adaptability — the exact skills our kids (and we) will need in an AI-shaped world. If you’ve ever wondered whether play is “productive,” this conversation will change how you see your afternoons, your marriage, your parenting, and your own sense of joy. Learn more at nifplay.org and connect with Mia at miasundstrom.com. A huge thank you to our sponsors! Check them ALL out below:  BetterHelp: Visit  www.BetterHelp.com/1000HOURS  today to get 10% off your first month. Quince - Visit www.quince.com/outside and get free shipping and 365 day returns Hungry Root - Go to www.hungryroot.com/1000HOURS and use code 1000HOURS to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. IXL Learning - Head to www.ixl.com/1000hours to get an exclusive 20% savings on your membership Wayfair - Go to www.wayfair.com and shop all things home Cure Hydration- head to www.curehydration.com/outside to find a retailer near you Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    13 Feb

    •
    58 min
  • How to Deal With an Overbearing Mother In Law | Dad University Podcast Ep. 255

    28/01/2020

    10

    How to Deal With an Overbearing Mother In Law | Dad University Podcast Ep. 255

    I’ve been asked this quite a few times, in fact, I just went on YouTube live the other day and this question came up and I got it again through Facebook yesterday. , How do I deal with an overbearing mother in law. I’m going to provide some specific tips but I want to first cover some general advice.  This doesn’t matter whether it’s your mother in law, father-in-law, your wife’s sister or her brother....this applies to anyone on your wife’s side of the family. If there is a problem, it is not for you to get involved.  This was actually advice I received from my mother many years ago.  She had dealt with some issues on my father’s side and made it clear that going over family lines was a no-no. If something bad was to happen, there is the possibility of no return. You see, this isn’t your blood family.  Unconditional love isn’t a requirement.   Let’s say you have an argument with your wife’s sister.  You may not ever recover.  You need to stay out of crossing that family line. You discuss the issue with your wife and your wife needs to handle it.  She is the one that needs to talk with her mother about whatever the issues are.  If she is unable or unwilling, then the issue is between you and your wife. If something happens with your parents, you are the one that needs to handle it.  Your wife should not be getting in arguments with your parents.  It works both ways. Have that talk with your wife and be clear about your family too.  You will deal with your family and she will deal with hers. Ok, now that we know you aren’t to get involved with your wife’s side of the family, let’s get to some tips on how to deal with an overbearing mother in law.   When you have a child, you sometimes get a little more sensitive to people’s suggestions or advice or their parenting style. My mom used to say “what happens at grandma's house, stays at grandma's house." She had given the kids candy and was upset about it.  She explained it to me this way.  Jason, if my grandkids remember my house and being with me as fun because they got candy, I think that’s ok.  After my mom passed away I realized how valuable that was. Whether it’s our in-laws or our own parents, they may do things a little different than we choose to do. Anyways, here are some things to keep in mind: 1) It’s a package deal – You probably knew what you signed up for when you said: “I do”.  Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, they all come with the package when you marry.  Especially if your wife is close with her family, then you have to keep in mind that it is a package deal.  That will help you keep perspective. 2) Be nice – Yes I’m saying to smile and be nice.  You don’t have to get along perfectly with your mother in law and you don’t need to fake a relationship if it’s not there, but you still should nice and respectful.  Sometimes you just have to bite your tongue and smile. 3) Set boundaries – Well, your wife needs to set the boundaries. Discuss the boundaries you want to set with your wife and once you both agree, she needs to communicate them to her mom.  Does she need to call before she comes over?  Does the baby need to go to sleep at a certain time?  Be clear what your wishes and instructions are.  Don’t expect they will all be followed or respected but she can certainly try. 4) Don’t take it personally – She may be an unhappy woman or just very opinionated.  Don’t let what she says affect you.  She could be critical of your parenting, or how you do things.  Great, let her have an opinion. 5) Take it into consideration – When your mother in law makes a suggestion or provides advice, a good phrase to use is “We will take that into consideration”.  It doesn’t make you have to do it at least acknowledges that you hear what she is saying and will think about it.  Even if you have no intention of taking her advice, the fact that you will consider it may be enough. 6) Get to know her – I mean really get to know her.

    28/01/2020

    •
    21 min

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