Estranged and Deranged

Chris Workman and Candi Morris

Estranged and Deranged is the podcast for parents who were cut off, shut out, rewritten, and then told to “work on themselves.” Hosted by Chris Workman and Candi Morris, we talk about adult child estrangement the way no one else will, blunt, honest, darkly funny, and done tiptoeing. We unpack grief, guilt, silence, therapy buzzwords used like weapons, and what it’s like to lose a child who’s still alive… and still blaming you. This is not a redemption tour. It’s not kid-bashing. And it sure as hell isn’t about staying quiet to keep the peace. It’s about reclaiming your voice, your sanity, and your life without apologizing for existing. If you’ve been erased, labeled the problem, or told your pain doesn’t count because you’re “the parent”… welcome. You’re not deranged. You’re just done swallowing bullshit.

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  1. The Dangerous Lie: That Estrangement Equals Abuse | Estranged & Deranged Ep. 9

    9 H FA

    The Dangerous Lie: That Estrangement Equals Abuse | Estranged & Deranged Ep. 9

    In this episode of Estranged & Deranged, Candi and Chris take on one of the most damaging and oversimplified narratives in estrangement conversations: the idea that if an adult child is estranged, they were automatically abused or neglected by their parents.Sparked by real comments, social media posts, and statements made by licensed professionals online, this episode challenges the growing belief that estrangement and abuse are interchangeable. Candi and Chris explain why this mindset is not only inaccurate, but harmful, especially to those who experienced real, severe abuse.Drawing from lived experience, decades of professional work in child welfare, and years of supporting estranged parents, this conversation explores how the word abuse has been diluted, misused, and applied without context, nuance, or individual examination.In this episode, we discuss:Why estrangement does NOT automatically equal abuseHow social media and therapy culture have blurred critical definitionsThe difference between abuse, conflict, hardship, and imperfect parentingHow perception and memory shape lived experienceWhy estranged parents are often labeled the villain by defaultThe impact of misusing the word abuse on those who truly need helpWhy accountability, reflection, and grief can exist at the same timeThis episode is not about denying pain.It is about restoring meaning, logic, and humanity to a conversation that has become extreme and polarized.If you are an estranged parent, an adult child trying to understand complex family dynamics, or someone navigating ambiguous loss, this episode offers perspective that is often missing from mainstream discussions. 00:00 Welcome to Estranged & Deranged01:45 The Comment That Sparked This Episode05:10 Why Estranged Parents Are Labeled the Villain08:20 Does Estrangement Automatically Mean Abuse?11:40 When the Word “Abuse” Loses Its Meaning15:30 Therapy Culture and Defining Abuse19:40 Real Abuse vs Hard Family Life23:30 Extreme Examples and Where the Line Gets Crossed27:40 Perception, Memory, and Different Childhood Experiences31:00 Accountability, Dialogue, and Final Thoughts33:40 Support Groups, Resources, and Where to Find Us 🎧 Listen or Watch on Your Favorite Platform 🎥 YouTubehttps://youtu.be/I4kvdb3Vbjs 🎧 Spotifyhttps://open.spotify.com/show/6TNAH4oNdGKE6cCCvW7r6C 🍎 Apple Podcastshttps://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/estranged-and-deranged/id1865706449 🎶 Amazon Musichttps://music.amazon.com/podcasts/84d2c2d7-6b9f-4744-abf0-a7b361107acf 🌐 Connect With Estranged & Deranged Website:https://estrangedandderanged.net Patreon (early access, bonus content, and community support):https://www.patreon.com/cw/EstrangedandDeranged Stan Store (resources, links, and recommended content):https://stan.store/candilcan_328 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations about:family estrangement, estranged parents, parental grief, ambiguous loss, accountability, healing, communication, and navigating complex family relationships.

    35 min
  2. Society Says You Don't Get to Have Pain When You Are Estranged

    5 FEB

    Society Says You Don't Get to Have Pain When You Are Estranged

    Episode Overview In Episode 8, Chris and Candi return with a refreshed setup and introduce an exciting new chapter for the podcast, welcoming their new producer, Maranda Taylor. The conversation quickly moves into one of the most difficult and misunderstood aspects of estrangement: the belief that parents should carry their pain quietly, take full blame, and remain silent. Chris and Candi speak openly about what it feels like to be challenged publicly, judged without context, and told that parental grief is invalid. This episode explores the damaging cultural narrative that estranged parents are automatically at fault and therefore do not deserve empathy, voice, or grief. Together, they challenge the idea that accountability and pain cannot coexist and affirm that multiple truths can exist at the same time. 🕒 Episode Breakdown & Key Moments (0:00–1:30) Welcome to Episode 8New setup and improved productionIntroduction of the podcast’s new producerLighthearted banter about the show’s name(1:30–3:30) Explanation of the weekly “Comment of the Week”Why these comments matterThe importance of parents having a voice(3:30–9:00) Candi shares a public comment that crossed the lineAssumptions about accountability and parentingAddressing the myth that estranged parents refuse reflectionClarifying that one estranged relationship does not define all relationships(9:00–12:00) Accountability, therapy, and introspectionEmotional impact of being publicly labeled and dismissed(12:00–16:00) Core topic: what society thinks parents should do with their painWhy the narrative demands silenceHow multiple truths can exist at once(16:00–19:30) Society’s discomfort with complexityPressure on parents to “just move on”Why estrangement grief is different(19:30–21:30) Mental and emotional toll of estrangementIdentity loss as a parentWhy silence can be dangerous(21:30–24:30) Why parental pain is minimizedGuilt, shame, and the villain narrative(24:30–28:30) Therapy expectations and responsibility dynamicsAdult-to-adult communicationAccountability as a shared responsibility(28:30–End) Final reflections on boundaries and humanityAffirmation that parents are allowed to feel painClosing thoughts on voice and healing💬 Key Themes Parental grief and ambiguous lossAccountability versus automatic blameSociety’s discomfort with parental painIdentity loss after estrangementHealing without silenceThe right to speak your truth🤍 Support the Podcast & Stay Connected If Estranged & Deranged resonates with you and you want to support the podcast and stay connected, there are a few ways to join us. 🔗 Visit the official website:https://estrangedandderanged.netLearn more about the podcast, upcoming episodes, resources, and the mission behind the conversations. 🤍 Join us on Patreon:https://www.patreon.com/cw/EstrangedandDeranged?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkPatreon is where you can directly support the podcast, access exclusive content, and help sustain this space for estranged parents who deserve voice, compassion, and community. 🤍Check Out Our Stan Stores: https://stan.store/griefandhealingwithchrishttps://stan.store/candilcan_328 🎧 Listener Takeaway You can take accountability and still grieve.You can reflect and still feel pain.Silence is not healing, and grief does not require permission.

    37 min

Descrizione

Estranged and Deranged is the podcast for parents who were cut off, shut out, rewritten, and then told to “work on themselves.” Hosted by Chris Workman and Candi Morris, we talk about adult child estrangement the way no one else will, blunt, honest, darkly funny, and done tiptoeing. We unpack grief, guilt, silence, therapy buzzwords used like weapons, and what it’s like to lose a child who’s still alive… and still blaming you. This is not a redemption tour. It’s not kid-bashing. And it sure as hell isn’t about staying quiet to keep the peace. It’s about reclaiming your voice, your sanity, and your life without apologizing for existing. If you’ve been erased, labeled the problem, or told your pain doesn’t count because you’re “the parent”… welcome. You’re not deranged. You’re just done swallowing bullshit.

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