Finding Love After 30

Shonda Howard

Finding Love After 30 is a podcast for women that are ready to have their big, amazing love story. Dating Coach and Hypnotherapist Shonda Howard will teach you exactly how to find your too-good-to-be-true Man. Every week you can expect simple how to’s and heart to heart conversations that will help you navigate dating and find your soul-mate relationship. Follow Shonda on instagram @shondahowardlove for more inspiration. Subscribe and share with any other women you know still want to believe that their love story is waiting for them!

  1. 26/12/2025

    Ep 41: You're not bad at manifesting love - you're in the belief gap

    If you’ve tried visualizing, journaling, affirmations, or “manifesting” your dream relationship, and you’re still attracting the same type of men or relationship pattern, this episode is for you. In this episode, Shonda introduces a concept she calls The Belief Gap: the space between what you want in love and what your nervous system and subconscious actually believe is safe and possible. You’ll learn why manifestation doesn’t happen from desire alone, and how to gently close the gap between where you are and the relationship you want, without forcing belief or gaslighting yourself. In This Episode, We Cover: Why manifesting love often feels frustrating or ineffectiveWhat The Belief Gap is and how it blocks real changeWhy your subconscious cares more about safety than desireThe “CD player” metaphor for why affirmations get rejectedThe money analogy that explains why big desires bounce off the nervous systemWhy your ideal partner list isn’t the problem—it’s diagnosticHow to turn desires into believable mantras that actually workWhy belief is built incrementally (and why that’s enough)How closing the Belief Gap changes how you show up in dating Podcast Episodes Mentioned: Episode 5 How to get what you want with "the list" Ready for More Support? If 2026 is the year you want to call in real love then come find me on Instagram and DM me the word CUSTOM and I’ll send you a personalized dating strategy video. Want expert guidance on your love life? Book a free call to explore working with me right here! Follow Shonda on Instagram and Tiktok for more inspo and dating advice.

    25 min
  2. 19/12/2025

    Ep 40: Clean Pain vs. Dirty Pain: Why Being Single Feels So Triggering (And How to Stop Spiraling)

    If being single feels especially triggering for you (engagement announcements, weddings, breakups, or the pressure of feeling “behind,”) this episode is for you. Today I'm breaking down a concept I teach all of my coaching clients: clean pain vs. dirty pain, and how confusing the two is what keeps so many women stuck in anxiety, shame, and dating spirals. In this episode, we cover: The difference between clean pain and dirty pain, and why it mattersWhy seeing other people get engaged or married can send you into a spiralHow your brain creates fear-based stories about your future without you realizing itWhy breakups hurt more when you make them mean something about youA simple way to validate your feelings without letting them run your lifeHow to stop dating from urgency, panic, or comparisonWhat it looks like to return to dating from a grounded, confident place This is a powerful mindset shift you can use anytime you feel triggered around being single, especially during the holidays. And if you are ready to stop spiraling, regulate your nervous system, and date with intention in the new year, send me a DM on Instagram (@shondahowardlove) with the word CUSTOM and I’ll send you a personalized dating strategy. Want expert guidance on your love life? Book a free call to explore working with me right here! Follow Shonda on Instagram and Tiktok for more inspo and dating advice.

    19 min
  3. 21/11/2025

    Ep 38: A Thanksgiving Message for the Woman Who Feels Left Behind

    In this Thanksgiving episode of Finding Love After 30, Shonda gets real about how hard the holidays can feel when you’re single, surrounded by couples, and dodging questions like “So…are you seeing anyone?” She walks you through why gratitude is not pretending everything is fine, but a grounding practice that helps regulate your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and actually make you more available for healthy love. You’ll hear how Shonda used daily gratitude on her own journey to meeting her husband, how this ties into the cognitive model from CBT, and a simple three-part gratitude practice you can start today, even if you’re feeling lonely or behind. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why holiday comments about your love life sting so much (and why it makes sense you feel anxious).How gratitude supports nervous system regulation and secure attachment.A simple daily gratitude/appreciation ritual you can do in a few minutes, morning or night. If you’re ready to go beyond gratitude and want personalized support with nervous system regulation, attachment healing, and dating strategy, send Shonda a DM on Instagram with the word CUSTOM and she’ll send you a free custom dating strategy with the exact steps to take based on where you are right now. Want expert guidance on your love life? Book a free call to explore working with me right here! Follow Shonda on Instagram and Tiktok for more inspo and dating advice.

    17 min

About

Finding Love After 30 is a podcast for women that are ready to have their big, amazing love story. Dating Coach and Hypnotherapist Shonda Howard will teach you exactly how to find your too-good-to-be-true Man. Every week you can expect simple how to’s and heart to heart conversations that will help you navigate dating and find your soul-mate relationship. Follow Shonda on instagram @shondahowardlove for more inspiration. Subscribe and share with any other women you know still want to believe that their love story is waiting for them!

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