Bonds after Baby: Rebuild your marriage, reduce postpartum resentment & guard maternal mental health

Evie Mpras, MS, LMFT
  • 0.0 (0)
  • Parenting
  • Updated weekly

You’ve started a family and you’re tired of facing conflict with your partner and loved ones. For the sake of you and your family you want to experience more support and connection. You’ve prepared in so many ways- the supplies, the toys, etc; and despite the fact that you’re doing all the things expected of you, you’re not enjoying enough of the loving connection you hoped for during this special time in your family. You’re sometimes feeling judged and misunderstood. Mom, I’m here to tell you that transitioning to parenthood sets relationships up to struggle. You aren’t alone! The problem is that most resources for Moms doesn’t address the power of healing family relationships. They don’t address how Moms and families can achieve relief much faster by improving connection. But we’re going to change that! Hi. I’m Evie. I’m a mom of two, wife, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, and fierce advocate of healthy family functioning. Everyone deserves peace and connection. Moms need more than individual survival tips & our kids need more than activities and toys. When couple relationships & family relationships improve, Moms (and everyone) enjoy more connection, more love, more support. That’s the kind of family dynamic we want to welcome our babies into. Marriage after baby is hard and marriage problems after baby are the norm. I’ve seen too many couples and families regret how much they fought and how lonely they felt, during what could have been a joyous time of bonding. Research and my clinical experience clearly shows that the healthier relationships are, the less anxiety, depression, & struggles parents and children experience. Having a baby is a FAMILY matter, not an individual matter. After helping countless moms, couples, and families start deeply connecting, I’ve learned what patterns hurt relationships and what makes things better. And I’m going to share my knowledge with you! Welcome to the Bonds after Baby podcast. Here you’ll get weekly support and coaching from me- This is going to be a place where you’re struggles will be understood, where you’ll get clarity on why it’s so hard, and receive actionable tips on how to get things to a better place. You can also listen with your partner, mother, mother-in-law, aunt- anyone who wants to learn with you! So grab your headphones and join me here- it’s time for you to enjoy more connection and less conflict during this special time in your family’s life. Want all the resources at your fingertips? I’ll be offering freebie goodies and coaching packages in the near future. Sign up for my email list at www.bondsafterbaby.com to get the goods.

  1. 2 days ago

    Sex after Kids: How Addressing Emotional Safety & Healthy Communication Helps w/ Physical Intimacy

    Why does sexual intimacy change for couples after kids? Even when we long to be close? In this episode, I explore the barriers to postpartum intimacy, sexual and emotional connection after kids, and what helps build back a healthy sexual relationships in early parenthood. A list of tips doesn't cut it when there are often deeper blocks or relationship dynamic blocks that need to be addressed first in order to create emotional safety that paves the way for physical pleasure. I cover: How division of labor and emotional labor impact desire and relational connectionWhy nervous system regulation and co-regulation matter in postpartum relationshipsThe impact of postpartum anxiety, mom burnout, survival mode, and relationship stress on sexual intimacyWhy expanding the definition of physical intimacy can reduce pressure and strengthen connection You both deserve to experience desire and pleasure in ways that feel emotionally safe and satisfying. This is Part 2 of a 3-part series on sexuality after kids. Sometimes these discussions require extra support from a professional. Connect with me to learn about how I can support you and your couple relationship: Website Offers @bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    13 min

  2. 19 Jun

    Postpartum Sex & Intimacy: What New Parents Should Know About Physical Intimacy After Kids

    It's easy to feel insecure or confused about your sexual relationship after baby within yourself, and within the couple relationship. In this episode, I explore the biological and emotional realities of postpartum intimacy, sexual desire after baby, and the effects of sexual adjustments in early parenthood. I discuss how feeding, sleep deprivation, hormonal changes, parenting stress, emotional flooding, and nervous system regulation can impact emotional connection, libido, and marriage communication after kids. Postpartum intimacy changes are completely normal, and certainly not a sign of something "wrong" in the relationship. Couples find relief, however, if they know what to expect and have grace and flexibility rather than panic thoughts and rigidity. I cover: Why breastfeeding and constant caregiving can lead to feeling “touched out”How hypervigilance, exhaustion, and parenting stress suppress sexual desireThe connection between emotional intimacy, nervous system regulation, and postpartum intimacyHow body image struggles and attachment wounds impact sexual connection after babyWhy new dads and partners can also experience postpartum adjustment difficulties, anxiety, and decreased libidoHow emotional distance, fear of rejection, and relationship triggers emerge during early parenthoodThe difference between spontaneous desire and responsive desire in marriageHow couples can reduce panic, strengthen bonds, and navigate postpartum relationship changes together Understanding the biological realities and period of adjustment can relieve postpartum anxiety around sexual intimacy and your physical relationship after kids. This is Part 1 of a 3-part series on sexuality. Sometimes these discussions require extra support from a professional. Connect with me to learn about how I can support you and your couple relationship: Website Offers @bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    14 min

  3. 5 Jun

    LGBTQ Parenting & LGBTQ Couple Relationships Postpartum: A Conversation with SC Nealy

    In this episode, we discuss how queer couples navigate emotional regulation, family dynamics, and relationship conflict after baby arrives. I'm thrilled to be joined by SC Nealy, LPC to discuss the challenges and points of resilience for LGBTQ couples in the transition to parenthood. We cover: the emotional experience of birth and non-birth partners/non-gestational partnersfacing societal expectationsthe importance of parenting support & and relational connection during early parenthood.the effects of extended family relationships & building community We also spend some time learning about SC Nealy's latest book on religious trauma Healing Sacred Wounds that will be released in August! Whether you’re navigating queer parenthood, postpartum recovery, emotional distance, or the challenges of building a strong parenting team, this conversation offers compassionate relationship advice and support for LGBTQ+ families adjusting to life after baby. SC Nealy is a therapist, author, and LGBTQ+ advocate. They specialize in trauma/religious trauma, complex PTSD, LGBTQIA+ issues, and couples and family therapy. Outside of their work, SC identifies as gender fluid and queer/lesbian. They’re a parent of three, co-parenting with their wife and ex-husband. Nealy's latest book Healing Sacred Wounds is available for pre-order now! Sometimes these discussions require extra support from a professional. Connect with me to learn about how I can support you and your couple relationship: Website Offers @bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    23 min

  4. 29 May

    What New Parents Should Know Before Baby: Mindset Shifts, Marriage Tips & the Postpartum Transition

    Preparing for baby is more than cribs, wallpaper, and diapers. Postpartum anxiety, postpartum depression, and marriage conflict can be significantly lessened if couples have awareness and realistic expectations on early parenthood. You shouldn't be blindsided in the transition to parenting and growing your family. Today I'm joined by Anastasia Voron, LMHC, to discuss what new parents should know before bringing home baby. Anastasia is a Maternal Mental Health Therapist, who is launching the motherhood center Doma on June 13th. Doma integrates multi component care for new mothers. She is also mom to a 2 year old daughter. Whether you are in the pregnancy stage or post-birth, we get into topics that are always valuable and helpful to consider: realistic expectations of self and othercouple communicationPMADS (postpartum mood disorders) and Matrescence (hormones, brain changes, body changes, healing journey)role changesextended family dynamicscommunication toolsBuilding up outside support systems Whether you are preparing for your baby, navigating the postpartum relationship, or wanting better parenting support and marriage support, this episode offers grounded advice and practical tools from two therapists to help you move from survival mode towards grace, family connection, and a healthier couple bond through the realities of motherhood and parenting. Follow updates for the launch of Doma on Anastasia's IG. Sometimes these discussions require extra support from a professional. Connect with me to learn about how I can support you and your couple relationship: Website Offers @bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    36 min

  5. 15 May

    Division of Labor: Tips for New Parents to Reduce the Invisible Load & Reduce Resentment in Marriage

    Division of labor is a hot potato for couples, especially new parents in survival mode. When every discussion turns to frustration- or when conversations get avoided, resentment in marriage, relationship burnout , and relationship conflict grows. Reducing stress around household chores can also help reduce postpartum anxiety and postpartum depression. In this episode, MJ Harford and I concrete tips for parents to navigate coming together as a team in ways that make these conversations productive instead of frustrating. MJ is a therapist serving individual clients in Virginia & DC, specializing in maternal mental health. She is also the founder of Resilient Returns, where she helps working parents and businesses navigate the transition back to work after parental leave.   In last week’s episode, MJ Harford and I got into how couples and new parents can foster emotional support when returning to work after parental leave, and dealing with division of labor. Once you have that emotional support, it’s easier to have talks about mental load, invisible load, and how to share tasks.  MJ and I share how couples can make the:  invisible load visibleseparate tasks to eliminate constant delegating automate taskscreate a functional system that eliminates some of the tension and difficultymindset shifts and flexibility- and more! Below are resources and deals for the working parent: MJ’s division of labor exercise: interactive + digital workbook. All Bonds after Baby listeners can use the code BAB50 at checkout to receive 50% off their parent program purchase at Resilient Returns.  Connect with Evie and learn about ways she can support your couple relationship: Website Offers Instagram @ bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    26 min

  6. 8 May

    Returning to Work after Parental Leave: Get Emotional Needs met through Spouse Support

    How can you and your spouse stay connected in the return to work after maternity leave or parental leave? Adjusting to the transition and re-navigating division of labor can bring significant tension. So how do you get emotional support and stay in each other’s corner when the mental load and invisible load is high, there are identity shifts happening, and you’re both still adjusting to marriage after baby? In this episode, MJ Harford, LPC and I discuss what emotional safety new parents can build together as a foundation to navigate issues that come up with the return to work. MJ is a therapist serving individual clients in Virginia & DC, specializing in maternal mental health. She is also the founder of Resilient Returns, where she helps working parents and businesses navigate the transition back to work after parental leave.   MJ and I share how couples can co-create emotional safety and managing emotional triggers around returning to work and division of labor so that you can navigate together without defensiveness, shutting down, and lashing out. So you guys can stay on the same team! Part 2 of our discussion next week will dive into concrete tools and approaches that can help ease the transition back to work after parental leave. Resources and deals for the working parent: MJ’s division of labor exercise: interactive + digital workbook. All Bonds after Baby listeners can use the code BAB50 at checkout to receive 50% off their parent program purchase at Resilient Returns.  Connect with Evie Website Support for Couples Instagram @bondsafterbaby This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    24 min

  7. 24 Apr

    From Relationship Conflict to Emotional Intimacy in Early Parenthood: My Roadmap to Reconnect

    Early parenthood rocks relationships and can make it feel like you and your spouse are on opposing teams. Many people think postpartum struggles should be treated individually- But real, long-lasting relief comes from getting marriage support.  During a big family transition, exhaustion builds fast. You might even start keeping score without noticing. Over time, that can lead to resentment and emotional distance. This episode will talk about why most advice around postpartum adjustment focuses on the individual, when in reality, this is a “we” problem. What often shows up as personal stress is actually relationship conflict playing out in new ways. If your postpartum relationship has felt more tense than connected, this will help you understand why and show you how to move out of that pattern and back toward each other. Whether you’re facing everyday parenting challenges or just wanting stronger emotional intimacy, this conversation is here to support you. You’ll start to see how small changes can rebuild your couple bond and create the kind of marriage support that makes this season feel less heavy. You don’t have to figure this out alone. Real relationship support starts when you stop treating it like a “you” problem and begin approaching it as a shared experience. Connect with Evie WebsiteTake the first step for a healthier couple relationship by booking a free initial consultation at https://bondsafterbaby.com/offersInstagram: @bondsafterbabyLinkedInIf you want to start a podcast or grow your existing one, visit https://julianabarbati.com/ and let them know I sent you! This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    17 min

  8. 17 Apr

    From Flooding to Co-Regulation for Parents: How Couples Calm Each Other’s Nervous Systems

    How can you and your spouse move beyond solo self regulation to build a parenting partnership where you offer each other lifelines- even when family stress feels overwhelming?  You can both choose verbal reassurance, soft eyes and emotional safety, instead of choosing defensiveness or withdrawal. In this episode, I will walk you through how to help your partner return to a green zone by using co-regulation techniques. We cover identifying signs of distress, using a calm tone to soothe the nervous system, the importance of soft eyes and facial expressions, and choosing supportive body posture. We also discuss how physical touch can act as a grounding mechanism and why taking breaks allows for better recovery time and nervous system recovery. Parenting is hard. You both deserve help from one another, so you can be there for your children. So, if you are looking for a more peaceful household using coregulation for parents to navigate emotional contagion, this episode is not to be missed. Connect with Evie WebsiteTake the first step for a healthier couple relationship by booking a free initial consultation at https://bondsafterbaby.com/offersInstagram: @bondsafterbabyLinkedIn If you want to start a podcast or grow your existing one, visit https://julianabarbati.com/ and let them know I sent you! This Podcast is not an alternative for mental health assistance and/or counseling with a licensed professional. For any specific medical questions about your condition and/or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider. This Podcast should not be considered mental health advice, rather for the sole purpose of information and education.

    17 min
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About

You’ve started a family and you’re tired of facing conflict with your partner and loved ones. For the sake of you and your family you want to experience more support and connection. You’ve prepared in so many ways- the supplies, the toys, etc; and despite the fact that you’re doing all the things expected of you, you’re not enjoying enough of the loving connection you hoped for during this special time in your family. You’re sometimes feeling judged and misunderstood. Mom, I’m here to tell you that transitioning to parenthood sets relationships up to struggle. You aren’t alone! The problem is that most resources for Moms doesn’t address the power of healing family relationships. They don’t address how Moms and families can achieve relief much faster by improving connection. But we’re going to change that! Hi. I’m Evie. I’m a mom of two, wife, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, and fierce advocate of healthy family functioning. Everyone deserves peace and connection. Moms need more than individual survival tips & our kids need more than activities and toys. When couple relationships & family relationships improve, Moms (and everyone) enjoy more connection, more love, more support. That’s the kind of family dynamic we want to welcome our babies into. Marriage after baby is hard and marriage problems after baby are the norm. I’ve seen too many couples and families regret how much they fought and how lonely they felt, during what could have been a joyous time of bonding. Research and my clinical experience clearly shows that the healthier relationships are, the less anxiety, depression, & struggles parents and children experience. Having a baby is a FAMILY matter, not an individual matter. After helping countless moms, couples, and families start deeply connecting, I’ve learned what patterns hurt relationships and what makes things better. And I’m going to share my knowledge with you! Welcome to the Bonds after Baby podcast. Here you’ll get weekly support and coaching from me- This is going to be a place where you’re struggles will be understood, where you’ll get clarity on why it’s so hard, and receive actionable tips on how to get things to a better place. You can also listen with your partner, mother, mother-in-law, aunt- anyone who wants to learn with you! So grab your headphones and join me here- it’s time for you to enjoy more connection and less conflict during this special time in your family’s life. Want all the resources at your fingertips? I’ll be offering freebie goodies and coaching packages in the near future. Sign up for my email list at www.bondsafterbaby.com to get the goods.

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