6 episodes
Dear Jane The Spinoff
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- Society & Culture
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4.9 • 96 Ratings
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This is Jane’s story about her experience of what she believed as a teenager to be a loving relationship in an Auckland church community during the 1990s. It was a sexual relationship with a man who was not only ten years her senior, but also her youth group leader. Now, 30 years on and with help from award-winning author and podcast producer Noelle McCarthy, Jane is trying to connect the dots between her stolen youth and the guilt, shame and trauma she’s carried since.
For Jane, this journey is about finding answers and ultimately a sense of peace. To do that, she sets out to come face to face with her abuser and take her power back.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
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1: Jane
Meet Jane, a mum in her forties who is battling with the demons of her past. For decades she’s buried what happened to her when she was a teenager but in recent years has come to realise she is not to blame for the connection she had with Dan, her adult youth group leader during her teen years. We also meet Noelle, a writer and producer who is helping Jane to make a podcast about her experience. Through a first person account and letters from the time that set a typical scene of teen life in the nineties, we find out how this disturbing connection came about and how it progressed from inappropriate feelings to a full blown relationship in plain sight.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) -
2: Ange
For thirty years Jane’s best childhood friend, Ange, has been waiting for her call. While Jane and Dan’s relationship was kept secret from most, Ange was privy to every detail from the very start. She remembers Dan as a controlling youth group leader who took advantage of her vulnerable best friend, and in the years since, Ange has felt guilt and anger about what happened between Jane and Dan.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Episode 3 will be out on Thursday 14 September, follow now to get it as soon a it drops
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) -
3: Mum and Lisa
Jane’s mum and sister knew that Dan and Jane dated in the 90s, but they only learnt the relationship was sexual in recent years. In this episode we talk to Jane’s family about what they remember of Dan and Jane’s connection and the shock they felt when they found out the full extent of the relationship. We start to see how the effects of this kind of sexual abuse can hurt a whole family. We also hear more about the moment when an already inappropriate relationship crossed a serious line.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Episode 4 will be out on Monday 18th September, follow now to get it as soon a it drops.
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz -
4: Christchurch
Noelle and Jane take a trip to Christchurch to meet with Catherine, a clinical psychologist who has experience working with survivors of sexual abuse. On arrival, Jane is suddenly struck ill and Noelle is worried about the toll this project might be taking on her. After talking to Catherine, Noelle begins to realise she might be out of her depth, and questions whether or not to go ahead with contacting Dan.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
The final episode of Dear Jane will be released this Thursday 21st September. Follow now so you get it as soon as it drops.
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) -
5: Dan
Dan has agreed to meet with Jane. But before that happens, Noelle wants Jane to talk to a lawyer about restitution options for survivors of historic sexual abuse in church settings in Aotearoa. Noelle and Jane also reach out to the church to see what the complaints procedure involves, and attempt to engage with senior church leaders from the time. Meanwhile, the day of the meeting arrives. Is Jane ready? Is she going to hear from Dan what she needs to hear?
Click here to read the statement Jane read to Dan in this episode.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Thank you for listening to Dear Jane. If you appreciated this series or believe it may help someone you know, please share it.
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) -
Dear Jane - out now
Dear Jane is a five-part series for The Spinoff, exploring the impact of a sexual relationship between a young teenage girl and her adult youth group leader.
Dear Jane was made with the support of NZ On Air
Resources:
If this series brings up any issues for you there is help available 24-7:
Helpline - free call or text 1737
Youthline - phone 0800 376 633, free text 234 or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Suicide Crisis Helpline - phone 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
Customer Reviews
Thank you for sharing
How very brave to share your story. I found myself crying through many parts of the story, as it made me realise it too wasn’t my fault. I found listening almost freeing and that I have been able to let go of some of the things such as blame and embarrassment I was holding on to.
Excellent
Jane, I hope this has contributed to your healing. Stories like these deserve to be told publicly. Predators should be held accountable for their behaviour. I don’t mean in court, rather this: these are our stories. We own them. The shame isn’t ours, it’s theirs.
Jane & Noelle did a perfect job in the telling of this story. Thank you & I hope that in telling your story, you leave the shame behind, & where it belongs.
Well written and reflected well the attitudes of the time
Thank you for talking about this issue it is very true how an ever like this can change your life. It effects the very makeup of who your are.