The Angry Therapist Podcast

The Angry Therapist
  • 4.6 (1.1K)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Semiweekly

Audio-Only Episodes. Captain’s Log: No guests. No fluff. Just me, the mic, and whatever’s clawing at my insides. Think audio journaling meets back-of-the-bar confessions. Less psychobabble, more soul bleed. Raw, real, and mostly for me. Audio + Video Episodes. You ask, I riff. Therapy meets real talk. More structure, more insight, more of the good stuff on love, dating, and tools we need to build a healthy relationship. Awesome guests. Less navel-gazing, more crowd-serving. This one’s for you.

  1. Re-release: How to Build Relationship Armor

    1d ago

    Re-release: How to Build Relationship Armor

    Don’t protect your heart. Protect your relationship. In this episode, John Kim explores what it really takes to build a relationship that lasts. After heartbreak, loss, and repeating old patterns, many people start doing the inner work and realize that healthy love does not just happen naturally. It has to be built with intention, ownership, and practice. John breaks down the idea of “relationship armor” as the tools and practices that protect the relationship itself. This includes creating a safe space, practicing self-awareness, communicating honestly, loving without dragging the past into the present, and learning how to fight in a healthier way. He also explains why being right can become poison in a relationship, why curiosity creates safety, and why presence, gratitude, space, and having your own life are essential parts of healthy love. In this episode: • Why healthy relationships are built, not found • How to create a safe space in love • The importance of self-awareness and ownership • Why communication builds trust and closeness • How to love without letting your past run the relationship • Why how you fight matters more than how often you fight • How giving up the need to be right creates safety • The role of mindfulness, gratitude, and space in lasting love • Why you need your own life inside a healthy relationship More about John: 📘Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here. https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 John’s latest book: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📸 Follow John on Instagram: https://instagram.com/theangrytherapist 🌐 Find out more about John Kim: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    21 min
  2. Why Breakups Hurt So Much: Attachment, Grief, and Healing

    3d ago

    Why Breakups Hurt So Much: Attachment, Grief, and Healing

    Why does a breakup feel like more than heartbreak? In this episode, John Kim explores why breakups can feel like a death, and why that experience is rooted in more than emotion alone. Drawing from neuroscience, attachment theory, and years of therapeutic experience, he explains what happens in the brain after a relationship ends and why healing takes time. John unpacks the hidden losses that often come with heartbreak, from the future we imagined to the identity we built inside a relationship. He also shares why recovery isn't about forgetting someone, but learning to create a new reality without them. In this episode: • Why breakups feel physically painful • The role dopamine and attachment play in heartbreak • How relationships become part of our emotional regulation system • The grief of losing a future that never actually happened • Identity loss after a breakup • Why healing is really about rewiring If someone in your life is going through a breakup, share this episode with them. Follow the podcast for more conversations on relationships, healing, and personal growth. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    23 min
  3. Therapy Thursdays: Love, Trust & Difficult Conversations

    Jun 4

    Therapy Thursdays: Love, Trust & Difficult Conversations

    In this Therapy Thursdays episode, we’re answering listener questions about the messy, tender, and sometimes confusing parts of relationships. We talk about what it means when someone says “I love you” very early on, how relationships naturally move through different stages, and what to do when the romance starts to fade. We also explore the painful reality of betrayal — including what repair can look like after cheating, and how to know whether your partner is truly respecting the process of rebuilding trust. This episode also looks at conflict and communication: how to bring up difficult issues with your partner, family, or friends when confrontation feels scary or overwhelming. In this episode, we cover: Whether saying “I love you” after two weeks is genuine love, infatuation, or a possible red flag The different stages relationships often go through First steps toward repair after infidelity What it means when a partner pressures you to accept contact with the person they cheated with How to talk about losing the spark in a long-term relationship Why romance and effort can fade after the honeymoon phase How to approach hard conversations when you hate confrontation The difference between healthy communication and avoiding conflict 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    19 min
  4. Healing Through Joy, Grief, and the Body with Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald

    Jun 3

    Healing Through Joy, Grief, and the Body with Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald

    Joy, trauma, grief, healing. What if they’re all connected? In this conversation, John sits down with Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald to explore what trauma actually does to the nervous system, why joy is more than a fleeting feeling, and how small moments of joy can help us stay grounded through life’s hardest seasons. They discuss the science behind joy, common misconceptions about trauma, how childhood experiences shape adult relationships, and why healing may require letting go of identities built around suffering. The conversation also touches on grief, psychedelics, nervous system regulation, and finding meaning after loss. In this episode: • Why joy can help regulate and rewire the nervous system • What trauma really does to the body and brain • How childhood trauma shows up in adult relationships • The danger of identifying too strongly with your wounds • Why grief may be more transformative than we realize • The role of flow states, surfing, and presence in healing Also mentioned: • MaryCatherine’s books Unbroken https://www.amazon.com/Unbroken-Trauma-Response-Never-Things-ebook/dp/B0B19CVVNM and The Joy Reset https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Reset-Trauma-Steals-Happiness/dp/0306836262 • Her upcoming K-12 resilience curriculum focused on trauma, stress, and joy • Her current work exploring grief through writing and poetry If this episode resonated with you, follow the podcast, share it with someone who may need it, and leave a review to help others find these conversations. Follow Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald Website: https://www.drmcmcdonald.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/mc.phd/?hl=en 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    49 min
  5. When Love Stops Saving the Relationship: Presence, Self-Abandonment, and Starting Over

    Jun 1

    When Love Stops Saving the Relationship: Presence, Self-Abandonment, and Starting Over

    What if the thing you keep chasing isn’t actually better... just more familiar? In this solo Q&A episode, John Kim reflects on fantasy, gratitude, emotional presence, and the difference between intensity and real love. From surfing in Costa Rica to answering listener questions about confidence, breakups, infidelity, and self-abandonment in relationships, this episode explores what happens when you stop escaping yourself and start paying attention to what’s actually here. Key points covered: • Why we romanticize the past and overlook the present • The difference between intensity and consistency in love • How healthy relationships create clarity instead of confusion • What confidence actually comes from • Signs you may be abandoning yourself in a relationship • Whether couples can rebuild after infidelity If this episode helped you, send it to someone who may need to hear it. Follow, rate, and share the podcast to support the show. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    23 min
  6. How to Expand When Life Narrows You

    May 27

    How to Expand When Life Narrows You

    John Kim explores what it really means to “seek nectar” in everyday life and why tiny moments of beauty, awe, and presence might matter more than we think. In this solo episode, John reflects on life in Costa Rica, nervous system healing, and the difference between surviving and actually feeling alive. He shares how years of stress and hyper vigilance can train us to scan for danger, and how intentionally noticing small moments of joy can slowly rewire the brain toward expansion, connection, and presence. Key points from this episode: • Why “stress narrows you and nectar expands you” • How survival mode becomes a default nervous system state • The neuroscience behind joy, presence, and neuroplasticity • What it means to train your body to “expect beauty again” • Tiny moments that create aliveness, awe, and emotional regulation • Why healing also means collecting new emotional experiences John also shares personal reflections on surfing, Costa Rica, creativity, parenthood, relationships, and the small rituals that bring him back to himself. If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who might need the reminder to seek more nectar in their life. Follow the podcast for more conversations on relationships, healing, and becoming more human. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    34 min
  7. How to Turn Drug-Based Love Into Medicine-Based Love

    May 25

    How to Turn Drug-Based Love Into Medicine-Based Love

    Love often starts as a drug. But what happens when the high wears off? In this episode, John Kim explores the difference between “drug-based love” and “medicine-based love,” and why most relationships struggle when chemistry begins to settle. He talks about projection, love addiction, emotional growth, and how real healing begins when relationships stop being a place to escape yourself and become a place to return to yourself. John also shares personal reflections on rebuilding life in Costa Rica after losing his home in Altadena, and how reinvention is shaping this new season of his life. Key points covered: • Why love feels intoxicating in the beginning • The difference between chemistry and healing • How projection shapes modern dating • “Recess love” vs mature relational work • Why repair matters more than avoiding conflict • How healthy love can rewire old patterns and fears Resources & mentions: • John discusses his new book, Love Hard on Purpose • Listeners who purchase the book get access to his private WhatsApp community If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who’s learning the difference between chemistry and healing. Follow the podcast for more conversations on love, growth, and relationships. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    28 min
  8. Therapy Thursdays | Anxious attachment, Exes & Relationship Myths

    May 21

    Therapy Thursdays | Anxious attachment, Exes & Relationship Myths

    In this Therapy Thursdays episode, John answers listener questions about anxious attachment, exes, blame, perfectionism, makeup sex, and relationship myths. He explores how attachment patterns affect your partner, why we sometimes stay mentally connected to an ex, and how to know whether a relationship has real long-term potential. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship has legs, why you keep blaming your partner, or why you still think about someone from your past, this episode will help you slow down and look at the deeper patterns underneath. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    17 min
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Hosts & Guests

4.6
out of 5
1,066 Ratings

About

Audio-Only Episodes. Captain’s Log: No guests. No fluff. Just me, the mic, and whatever’s clawing at my insides. Think audio journaling meets back-of-the-bar confessions. Less psychobabble, more soul bleed. Raw, real, and mostly for me. Audio + Video Episodes. You ask, I riff. Therapy meets real talk. More structure, more insight, more of the good stuff on love, dating, and tools we need to build a healthy relationship. Awesome guests. Less navel-gazing, more crowd-serving. This one’s for you.

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