Birds and Bees Don't Fck

Arielle Zadok

We can all agree that the whole birds and bees thing was a lie, right? When it comes to sex education in the 80s, 90s and even today, everyone gets a big ole F. And not the good kind. Join host Arielle Zadok as she talks to friends, comedians and sexuality professionals about what they did, and didn't learn about sex growing up.

  1. 3h ago

    Episode 69: Making Her Moan w/ Daddy Heff

    It's 6/9 so we're publishing early! Plus if you're in Los Angeles, come with us... to Melrose Umbrella Co from 6-9p to celebrate! Daddy Heff is a professional dominant, kink educator and master of the sensual art of impact play from Greensboro, North Carolina where his earliest sex education included school lessons on fallopian tubes, ovaries, sperm and semen, sneaking reads of his mom's risqué novels, flipping through Penthouse Forum stories, and asking a very uncomfortable teacher to explain anal sex after seeing it in a porn video. In this episode we talk about the connection between moaning, safety and surrender, why BDSM often models communication better than vanilla relationships, and how Daddy Heff uses breath, heart space connection and energetic presence to help people fully let go. We also get into the difference between tops and doms, the importance of vetting and informed consent, how he discovered kink through a dominatrix in Germany, and the moment a birthday spanking turned into the start of his professional domination career. Plus: throat chakras, performance vs presence, why subs need education too, and what it actually takes to create trust inside a scene. Want more? Check out my DIY course, Fck Like The Movies: https://www.rubyisland.media/course _________________________________________________  Where to find Daddy Heff: Instagram: @the_real_daddy_heff/ X: @daddy_heff  Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Like jewelry that'll make you cum? Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 02:19 BDSM Negotiation, Limits & Scene Safety 04:27 Why Moaning Matters During Sex 07:35 Sexual Shame & Being Told to Stay Quiet 11:38 Nervous System & Relaxation Before Sex  18:10 Why Subs Need Education Too 22:14 The Dangers of Untrained BDSM Play 24:29 Presence, Performance & Energy in Kink 28:34 Dom vs Top & Sub vs Bottom Explained  34:10 Growing Up in Greensboro, NC & Early Sex Education 37:18 Discovering BDSM in Germany 41:49 Learning Impact Play & Finding a Mentor 44:38 The First Paid Domination Session 48:53 Heart Space Connection & Energetic Domination 53:13 Live Demo Stories & Orgasmic Spanking 57:10 Anal Play, Energy Work & Kink Healing 59:47 Teaching Men How to Be Better Dominants 01:03:06 Episode 69 on 6/9

    1h 6m
  2. 6d ago

    Stay Attractive. Stay Attracted. w/ Phil Morris

    Join us for the watch party on YouTube LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on episode release day: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Phil Morris is an actor best known as Jackie Chiles on Seinfeld and John Jones on Smallville who grew up in Los Angeles and Beverly Hills, where the closest thing to sex education was basic health class, a little anatomy, and figuring out the rest through growing up in Hollywood. In this episode we talk about Good Vibes Breakfast Club, the beautiful way community can create space for men to be vulnerable, and why real connection so often happens when people drop the performance and just show up as themselves. Phil shares what it was like growing up in Beverly Hills as the son of original Mission: Impossible star Greg Morris, how early exposure to fame shaped the way he sees the world, and why curiosity, humility, and authenticity matter so much more than status. We also get into marriage, intimacy, what it actually takes to stay connected over decades, and Phil's simple but powerful advice to stay attractive, stay attracted, stay interesting, and stay interested. Phil and I are getting real honest with Reddit stories. Join Patreon and dive in! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Get everything you need to Fck Like The Movies _____________________________________________________________ Where to find Phil: Instagram: @thephilmorris Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck   Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon STORY 1: AITA for ignoring my wife for throwing away my late wife video tapes? STORY 2: My 18M son says my brother's wife (30F) crossed boundaries with him and now my family says I'm overreacting (46F) STORY 3: Do I (F 26) tell my boyfriend (M 26) his ex cheated on him?   Like my cuffs AND my vibrator necklace? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet: 02:47 Good Vibes Breakfast Club, car culture, and finding community in Los Angeles 05:14 Male vulnerability, brotherhood, and emotional intimacy during the pandemic 07:39 Why real connection happens when people drop the filter 09:50 Community, commonality, and why we are more alike than we are different 12:10 Why big conversations happen best on a beautiful drive 14:30 Intimacy meetings, relationship check-ins, and how to communicate with your partner 16:54 Emotional intelligence, curiosity, and what makes relationships actually work 19:20 Marriage advice, acceptance, and why you cannot carry someone else's water 21:35 Stay attractive, stay attracted, stay interesting, stay interested 23:52 Novel thinking, personal growth, and accepting the peaks and valleys of life 26:13 Why relationships, friendships, and community all need curiosity and effort 28:28 Good Vibes, masculine friendship, and non-sexual touch between men 30:41 Growing up in Los Angeles and Beverly Hills as Greg Morris' son 31:42 Fame, Hollywood, Beverly Hills, and what Phil learned early about success 34:01 Black representation in Hollywood and being raised around groundbreaking artists 35:25 How community showed up in grief, loss, and the final days of a loved one 37:48 Grace, gratitude, and why pain does not have to define your story 40:05 Falling down, getting up, and deciding how to write your own life 42:27 Career pivots, producing, creativity, and doing the work that actually lights you up 44:48 Why Phil stopped hustling and started creating 47:13 Acting, storytelling, and what comic conventions reveal about human connection 49:40 Leadership, gender dynamics, and domestic labor in relationships 52:03 Growing up with basic sex education, Hollywood freedom, and getting married young 54:22 Marriage, desire, fidelity, and how to stay connected over time 56:43 Long-term relationships, teamwork, and the three energies inside a partnership 59:04 Relationship advice, acceptance, and what it means to stay on the same team

    1h 3m
  3. May 27

    Everyone Wants To Say Yes Mistress w/ Justine Cross

    Justine Cross is a professional dominatrix, dungeon owner, educator, and sex worker advocate who grew up in the tri-state area where she actually received surprisingly comprehensive sex education growing up between private and public schools, something she credits with shaping how she thinks about sex, consent, and power dynamics today. In this episode we talk about how someone becomes a professional dominatrix, what actually happens inside a BDSM dungeon, and why kink spaces are often far more structured, communicative, and consent-focused than most people expect. We also get into power dynamics, submission, community, play parties, and the difference between what people imagine BDSM is and what it actually looks like in real life. Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 4p PT / 7p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck FCK LIKE THE MOVIES _____________________________________________________________ You know Justine and I are not holding back on these Reddit stories. Join Patreon and dive in! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Where to find Justine: Instagram: @thejustinecross https://www.instagram.com/thejustinecross/ tiktok: @thejustinecross https://www.tiktok.com/@thejustinecross x: @justineplays https://x.com/justineplays Bluesky: @justineplays https://bsky.app/profile/justineplays.bsky.social Fetlife: @justineplays https://fetlife.com/Justineplays Website: www.LosAngelesDominatrix.com Dungeon: www.stellaobscura.com   Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck https://www.instagram.com/birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck https://www.tiktok.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon STORY 1: Younger sister is a tradwife and I secretly set up an investment account in case she needs to leave her husband. Do I tell her? STORY 2: Am I the jerk for sleeping with my colleague after my husband left me?   Like my cuffs AND my vibrator necklace? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 02:18 Growing up in the tri-state area with surprisingly comprehensive sex education 05:07 Early ideas about sex, consent, and communication 08:36 How Justine became a professional dominatrix 12:11 What actually happens inside a professional BDSM dungeon 15:42 Negotiation, boundaries, and why kink requires clear consent 19:55 The psychology of domination and submission 24:18 Why people are drawn to power dynamics and BDSM 28:43 Debunking myths about dominatrices and kink culture 32:27 The difference between fantasy kink and real BDSM practice 37:06 Community, play parties, and finding kink-friendly spaces 41:15 Running a dungeon and the logistics behind the scenes 46:02 Why BDSM spaces can feel safer than mainstream dating culture 50:18 Humor, curiosity, and why kink doesn't have to be dark or scary 55:31 What people misunderstand most about BDSM and domination

    1h 5m
  4. May 20

    Is This Blood Normal? w/ Nicole Jardim

    Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Nicole Jardim is a certified women's health coach, author of Fix Your Period, and founder of the Institute for Menstrual Health originally from Antigua where the closest thing to sex education was mostly silence… leaving her to figure out hormones, cycles, and menstrual health the hard way before eventually dedicating her career to helping other women do the same. In this episode we talk about Nicole and I's shared history working in television production, how burnout and health challenges led her to leave the entertainment industry, and the path that eventually led her into women's health. We get into hormones, birth control, cycle literacy, and why so many women grow up completely disconnected from what their bodies are actually doing. Nicole explains why doctors often prescribe the pill as a quick fix instead of addressing root causes, how women are frequently dismissed when advocating for their health, and why learning to understand your cycle can change the way you approach energy, relationships, sex, and overall wellbeing. Want more? Catch bonus Reddit story reactions, private chats and more on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck FCK LIKE THE MOVIES _________________________________________________ Where to find Nicole: Website - https://nicolejardim.com/ Nicole's Membership - The Fix Your Period Collective https://www.fixyourperiod.com/ Nicole's Practitioner Program - https://instituteformenstrualhealth.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/nicolemjardim/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/nicolemjardim/ Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Love jewelry that doubles as a vibrator?  Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:  https://lovecrave.com/arielle —————————————————————————————— Episode Cheat Sheet 02:33 Growing up without real sex education and how women learn about their bodies 04:58 Working in television production and how Nicole and Arielle originally met 07:23 The birth control pill and why it's prescribed for almost every period problem 08:38 Hormones, birth control, and the unexpected ways they can affect your body 13:31 Coming off hormonal birth control and noticing changes in mood, health, and cycles 16:58 Burnout, leaving the entertainment industry, and pivoting into women's health 18:17 Why birth control became the default medical solution for women's health issues 22:04 Learning body literacy and understanding what your hormones are actually doing 24:42 Menstrual cycle literacy and why most people don't understand ovulation 28:36 Fertility awareness and why cycle tracking can change how you approach health 31:16 Cultural messaging that teaches women their bodies are a problem 36:50 Why partners should understand menstrual cycles and hormonal changes 40:57 Advocating for yourself in medical settings when doctors dismiss symptoms 44:05 Training practitioners and teaching menstrual health and hormone literacy 48:12 Understanding energy, sex drive, and mood changes across the menstrual cycle 52:36 Becoming a "period detective" and learning what your cycle is telling you 56:47 What heavy bleeding and painful periods might actually mean 58:23 Women bleeding for months and being told it's normal 59:42 Severe period pain, ER visits, and why doctors often dismiss menstrual symptoms 01:00:48 Heavy bleeding, IUDs, and when medical solutions miss the real problem

    1h 3m
  5. May 13

    Purity Culture and Fascism Are Very Good Friends w/ Erica Smith

    Erica Smith is an award-winning sexuality educator, advocate, and author from rural Pennsylvania, where she grew up casually Christian, went to public school, learned sex ed from a gym teacher, and somehow became the most responsible teenage sexual health nerd with birth control, condoms, spermicide, and library books before having sex for the first time. In this episode we talk about purity culture, religious sexual shame, high-control groups, Christian nationalism, marital consent, "duty sex," the pressure placed on both women and men in evangelical purity teachings, and why healing from purity culture is not just about learning sex ed, but reconnecting to your body, your signals, your autonomy, and your right to desire without fear. Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck   Want to hear Reddit stories? Join the afterparty over on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck   FCK LIKE THE MOVIES Where to find Erica: Website: https://www.purityculturedropout.com Instagram / Threads: @ericasmitheducates Book: The Purity Culture Recovery Guide: Shame-Free Sex Ed You Deserve   Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon:https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck   Like my cuffs AND my vibrator necklace? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 00:37 Why purity culture impacts everyone regardless of religious upbringing 02:01 Reclaiming spiritual language, God, universe, source, and finding meaning outside of shame 03:35 Erica's rural Pennsylvania upbringing and not coming from purity culture or evangelical Christianity 06:52 Conservative Judaism, kosher, Shabbat, fear of God, and the god of religious sexual shame 10:13 Why controlling sex is the central power tool in high-control groups and cults 13:15 Twin Flames, New Age purity culture, divine feminine and masculine, and forced relationship roles 15:11 Non-monogamy, the one-person mythology, and not knowing ethical non-monogamy was an option 18:22 The pressure on children to save souls and why evangelical recruitment causes anxiety 20:15 AIDS education, high school sex ed, birth control, Cosmo handouts, and a raw egg as a fake baby 23:35 Family planning at 16, condoms, spermicide, Planned Parenthood, teen pregnancy, and pre-internet sex ed 26:03 Curiosity as the common thread among sex educators and talking explicitly with friends about sex 30:26 From women's studies to abortion clinic counselor, September 11th, anti-abortion terrorism, and fake anthrax 33:46 Seventeen years doing sex ed and HIV prevention with incarcerated youth in Philadelphia juvenile detention 35:09 Exvangelicals, deconstruction, the 2016 election, and the mass exodus from evangelical Christianity 39:28 Wedding night trauma, the flip-the-switch expectation, marital rape, duty sex, and long-term sexual dysfunction 43:09 Consent in marriage, the every-72-hours myth, Christian patriarchy, and denying women the right to say no 46:14 Rape culture, dissociation, blaming wives for husbands cheating, and the harm purity culture does to men 48:41 Duty sex, maintenance sex, intimacy dates, responsive desire, and why sex should never be expected 50:06 Men in purity culture, being taught you are a sex demon, bounce your eyes, and associating desire with disrespect 53:01 How purity culture silences body signals around consent, danger, hunger, and attraction — and somatic healing 56:08 Why purity culture is not a thing of the past, Christian nationalism, fascism, voting, and bodily autonomy 01:01:07 Where to find Erica Smith, The Purity Culture Recovery Guide, and purity culture recovery support groups

    1h 3m
  6. May 6

    A Condom For A Cheeto w/ Alex Gay

    Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Alex Gay is a certified intimacy and relationship coach and adult performer from Maryland, where his sex education came from homeschooling, evangelical purity culture, and two conversations with his dad that left him wondering if condoms were worth trading for Cheetos. In this episode we talk about growing up in a religious high-control group, shame as a clue to desire, what kink actually means, why so many men are expected to magically know how to be good in bed, and how Alex went from purity culture to helping queer people, couples, and curious adults feel more confident exploring sex, intimacy, kink, and their own bodies. Want to hear Alex and I unfiltered reading Reddit stories? Join the afterparty over on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck   FCK LIKE THE MOVIES   Where to find Alex: Instagram: @heyalexgay TikTok: @heyalexgay Website: https://heyalexgay.com/   Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon STORY 1: Am I the A*****e for Breaking Up With My Girlfriend After She Wanted Our Relationship to Be P***y Free? STORY 2: My Husband Needs to Touch My Breasts to Fall Asleep. I'm Exhausted and Need a Divorce. Am I the A*****e? STORY 3: Am I the A*****e for Breaking Up With My Girlfriend Because She Literally Told Me She Would Cheat on Me If I Took a New Job?   Like my cuffs AND my vibrator necklace? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 00:00 Meet Alex Gay, certified intimacy coach and adult performer 02:23 Adult entertainment, OnlyFans, and why spicy content builds coaching trust 04:48 Coaching sexual confidence, kink, communication, and why sex education is lifelong 05:30 The pressure on cis straight men to magically know how to be good in bed 07:01 Why "normal" does not exist when it comes to sex, bodies, and kink 08:10 Shame as a clue to desire and how taboo shapes what turns us on 10:20 Growing up in Maryland inside an evangelical high-control group 11:44 Homeschool sex ed, Christian sex books, condoms, and the Cheeto trade 16:17 Sleepovers, curiosity, and why honest sex education changes everything 19:30 Boy moms vs. moms who have boys and the emotional weight placed on sons 22:00 Leaving religion, hitting rock bottom, and finding inherent self-worth 25:16 Men's mental health, masculinity, and why 60 men die by suicide every hour 29:28 Queer sex education, coaching, and what gay male coaches bring to the table 31:46 Play parties, group scenes, body confidence, ethical porn, and real naked bodies 38:25 Alex's first OnlyFans videos, strip interviews, and modeling non-sexual intimacy 44:00 Course creation, ADHD, and why the labor of pleasure cannot be on your partner 49:21 Coaching couples, high-mileage questions, and becoming your own sex detective 56:32 Dr. Tush aftercare products, butt play recovery, and kink aftercare 01:00:00 Bonus Reddit stories and where to find Alex Gay

    1h 2m
  7. Apr 29

    Purity Culture Sets Us Up for Failure w/ Reuben Johnson

    Reuben Johnson is one half of FlyDuo, a husband-and-wife team behind the pleasure-forward platform SexTech n' Chill, originally from the suburbs of Boston where growing up in a strict religious environment meant sex education was mostly abstinence, shame and silence. In this episode we talk about purity culture, abstinence-only sex education and how religious messaging around sex can leave people completely unprepared for real intimacy. We get into the science behind pleasure, why nervous system regulation matters in the bedroom, the myth of "think about baseball" when people struggle with performance anxiety, and how honest conversations about sex can actually help protect people from harm. We also talk about building a pleasure-centered relationship, the work Reuben and his wife are doing with SexTech n' Chill, and why comprehensive sex education is still so controversial in the United States. Want more? Catch bonus Reddit story reactions, private chats and more on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Get my Yes / No / Maybe List  or Fck Like The Movies full course _________________________________________________ Where to find Reuben: SexTech n' Chill: https://sextechnchill.com FlyDuo: https://xoflyduo.com Instagram: @sextechnchill  YouTube: @SexTechNChill   Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Love jewelry that doubles as a vibrator?  Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:  https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 02:10 Museum of Sex panel and meeting other sex educators 04:02 Consent, body language and what animals teach us about boundaries 08:36 Trauma responses, fawning and reading nonverbal cues 11:05 Nervous system regulation, anxiety and grounding techniques 15:02 Communication, emotional safety and better sex 19:11 Performance anxiety and why "think about baseball" is terrible sex advice 22:05 Vulnerability, trust and sexual confidence in relationships 24:40 Growing up in Boston and avoiding sex education conversations 26:40 Religious purity culture and sexual shame 29:10 The first real sex education class in high school 31:03 Condoms, lube and the basics abstinence-only programs skip 33:28 Why abstinence-only sex education leaves people unprepared 34:15 Dr. Joycelyn Elders and the fight for comprehensive sex education 36:01 Why pleasure and eroticism challenge systems of control 41:00 Social media censorship and the fight for online sex education 46:54 Porn history, kink and the evolution of sexuality 52:20 Wedding night sex after purity culture 55:50 Building Sex Tech & Chill and pleasure-centered relationships

    1h 4m
  8. Apr 22

    I Need You To Say Blue Balls w/ Ginger Koehler

    Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck Ginger Koehler is a sex educator, columnist and speaker from the Midwest where her earliest "sex talk" happened over mac and cheese at a McAlister's… and ended with her bursting into tears when her mom explained what a period was. In this episode we talk about what it actually means to study sex academically, why people confidently give terrible sex advice online, and the moment Ginger realized she wanted to build a career translating complex sex science into language normal humans can understand. We also get into missionary position myths, writing about sex for a living, and why curiosity might be the most important sexual skill anyone can have. Want more? Catch bonus Reddit story reactions, private chats and more on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck Get my Yes / No / Maybe List _________________________________________________ Where to find Ginger: Instagram: @gingerr_and_spice Ginger & Spice Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/7f6vAvxqI2aexnSCc32FVT?si=17bfdfc63cbd4df0 Substack: https://gingerkoehler.substack.com/ Where to find Arielle: Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck   Like spicy jewelry?  Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:  https://lovecrave.com/arielle   Episode Cheat Sheet 02:51 How Ginger became a sex educator and sex columnist 04:28 Studying sexuality academically vs learning from experience 06:24 "I need you to say blue balls" and translating sex science into normal language 09:43 Epididymal hypertension vs "blue balls" and sexual slang explained 12:08 Why bad sex advice spreads so easily online 14:12 Sex myths people still believe about bodies and pleasure 18:04 Missionary position myths and why "boring" sex positions can actually be great 21:10 How sexual expectations shape dating and relationships 23:10 Writing about sex vs talking about sex publicly 27:28 Thoughtful sex vs performative sex culture 31:44 The moment Ginger decided to study sexuality academically 35:21 Getting the "period talk" over mac and cheese at McAlister's 38:47 Growing up shy about sex and becoming a public sex educator 41:09 Why comprehensive sex education still scares people 45:07 What comprehensive sex education actually teaches 49:12 Why curiosity is the most underrated sexual skill 52:38 What age-appropriate sex education really means

    1h 5m

Trailers

5
out of 5
27 Ratings

About

We can all agree that the whole birds and bees thing was a lie, right? When it comes to sex education in the 80s, 90s and even today, everyone gets a big ole F. And not the good kind. Join host Arielle Zadok as she talks to friends, comedians and sexuality professionals about what they did, and didn't learn about sex growing up.

You Might Also Like