Mary's Cup of Tea: the Self Love Podcast for Women

Mary Jelkovsky
  • 4.9 (675)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Weekly

Welcome to Self Love. We cover topics surrounding self love including body-image, confidence, self-worth, body positivity, mindset, mental health, feminism, relationships, and so much more. Along the way, your host Mary lets you in on her personal life, never shying away from the messy, raw, and real conversations that we all crave. So grab a cup of tea, slide in your headphones, and get ready for some self-lovin!

  1. 5h ago

    The Mindset Shift That Helps Me Stop Comparing Myself to Other Women

    Comparing yourself to other women can make it feel like their success is proof that you're falling behind. In this episode of Mary’s Cup of Tea, Mary explores envy, comparison, jealousy, and the pressure women feel to hit life milestones on an invisible timeline. Through her experience trying to conceive, she shares a mindset shift for breaking out of the comparison trap and learning to enjoy your life before everything goes according to plan. Tune into our self-love podcast to learn… How to stop comparing yourself to and feeling envious of other womenWhy every version of your life is worth experiencing fully, even when it looks different from what you imaginedHow to stop putting your life on hold while waiting for a pregnancy, promotion, relationship, or other milestoneThe unexpected question that shifts my perspective when comparison takes over  For women navigating fertility, career changes, family dynamics, or the pressure to have it all figured out, this episode is a reminder that you can grieve the life you wish you had without abandoning the one you do have. Remember: Everything is a win if the goal is to experience. You can want more for your life without treating the life you have as less. You don't have to catch up to anyone to start living fully.   Mentioned In This Episode... 200 Reasons to Choose Self-Love Between Two Kingdoms: A Memoir of a Life Interrupted by Suleika Jaouad Living the Questions (Without Fixing Yourself) with Suleika Jaouad and Kate Bowler   Deepen your self-love journey with Mary’s books: The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook to help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts for calming self-criticism and learning to love yourself.  Follow Mary's self-love journey on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast If you’re enjoying Mary’s Cup of Tea, share it with the women in your life! Your support helps spread the gift of self-love! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  2. Oct 22

    If You’re Feeling Uninspired, Listen To This.

    What do you do when you feel uninspired, creatively stuck, or disconnected from the person you want to be? Let’s chit chat about how to find inspiration again, reconnect with your creativity, and feel more motivated in your everyday life. If you’ve been feeling stuck in a rut or wondering where your spark went, this might give you a boost of inspiration. Tune into our self-love podcast to learn… Why feeling uninspired might have less to do with a lack of creativity and more to do with how you're approaching day-to-day lifeThe surprising connection between dopamine, social media addiction, and your ability to feel inspiredWhy boredom might be the gateway to your creativityHow to find inspiration in unexpected places, even when you feel stuck, unmotivated, or like you don't have the time, energy, or resources to pursue your creative interests  We'll explore the link between creativity, spirituality, personal growth, mental health, and self-compassion. Whether you're looking for motivation or craving a little more magic in your everyday life, this episode is an invitation to look at inspiration differently. Because your creativity, curiosity, and capacity for joy are worth making room for. Remember: Inspiration is not something that happens outside of you. It's always within you, even when it feels buried beneath the noise. You don't have to criticize yourself into becoming more productive or turn every quiet season into another thing to fix. The path back to yourself starts with extra self-compassion, a willingness to embrace uncertainty, and the reminder that your self-worth has nothing to do with how much you accomplish.   GET MY SELF-LOVE PLAYLIST: https://maryscupoftea.com/playlist   Mentioned In This Episode: Only Murders in the Building's Mabel's Most Memorable Looks of All TimeLouise Hay meditationEsther Hicks lectureWayne Dyer speechHow to Create a Frequency so Magnetic Your Desires Chase You by Katie Clarke on YouTubeThe impact of walking on creative thinking: A systematic review and meta-analysis  Deepen your self love journey with Mary’s books: The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook to help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts for calming self-criticism and learning to love yourself.Follow Mary's self love journey on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast And if you’re enjoying Mary’s Cup of Tea, share it with the women in your life! Your support helps spread the gift of self-love! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  3. Oct 15

    Fall Favorites: Cozy Self-Care Staples + What I’m Reading & Watching

    If you enjoy thoughtful recommendations that make you think, feel, and romanticize autumn, this one’s for you! In this fall favorites episode, I’m sharing what I’ve been reading, watching, and reaching for lately, from books that have changed how I think about friendship to the TV shows I’m obsessed with. Plus, a few self-care staples that are making fall feel warm and cozy. I also go off on tangents about female friendships, the beauty of connecting with strangers, fictional female characters, and why spending time together in person matters more than ever. I’m also sharing my feminist thoughts on East of Eden, my love for Ted Lasso, yummy cycle-syncing teas, my favorite lip liner, and the tea towels that are bringing a little extra charm to my kitchen. Mentioned In This Episode... How To Make Adult Friendships Easier with Kat Vellos on Mary’s Cup of TeaBestie Break-Ups and Why Female Friendships Feel So Fragile with Danielle Bayard Jackson on Mary’s Cup of TeaFighting For Our Friendships: The Science and Art of Conflict and Connection in Women's Relationships by Danielle Bayard JacksonTalking to Strangers: What We Should Know about the People We Don't Know by Malcolm GladwellEncounterism: The Neglected Joys of Being In Person by Andy FieldEast of Eden by John SteinbeckEast of Eden limited series on NetflixTed Lasso on Apple TV+Cycle syncing teas by Tea Lady BrooklynEspresso-colored lip liner by NYX CosmeticsThe earplugs I sleep with every nightCotton & jute blend tea towels from TargetThe thermos I use every dayDeepen your self love journey with Mary’s books: The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook to help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts for calming self-criticism and learning to love yourself.Follow Mary's self love journey on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast And if you’re enjoying Mary’s Cup of Tea, share it with the women in your life! Your support helps spread the gift of self-love! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  4. Oct 8

    Why Is It So Hard to Receive Love? The Psychology of Self-Worth with Dr. Marisa G. Franco

    Why is it so hard to receive love, even when we desperately want it? In this episode, psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Marisa G. Franco and I unpack the hidden side of self-worth: how our early relationships shape the way we see ourselves, why love can sometimes feel threatening, and why shame may be a bigger problem than insecurity itself. You will learn… Why we sometimes pull away from people who love usHow your attachment style can shape your self-worth and the way you experience relationshipsWhy being “secure” shouldn’t mean becoming perfectly healed, unbothered, or free of insecurityHow you can work with memories to soften the way painful experiences affect your self-worthThe science behind how therapy modalities like EMDR, EFT, IFS, and inner child work can heal childhood traumaWhy emotional honesty and self-compassion may be more powerful than trying to suppress the parts of ourselves we don’t like  Remember: Self-worth isn’t about becoming someone who never feels insecure. It’s about learning to treat your internal world as if it matters, including the parts of yourself you’re still learning to love. Dr. Marisa G. Franco is a psychologist and bestselling author, and leading expert on relationships, self-worth, and belonging. She works as a professor at The University of Maryland and authored the New York Times bestseller Platonic: How The Science of Attachment Can Help You Make—and Keep—Friends and her new book Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment. She speaks on belonging and self-worth at corporations, government agencies, non-profits, and universities. For tips on friendship, you can follow her on Instagram @drmarisagfranco or go to her website, www.DrMarisaGFranco.com, where you can download a list of practices to improve self-worth. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with the women in your life! Or on social media! Be sure to tag @maryspodcast and @drmarisagfranco Mentioned In This Episode... Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment by Dr. Marisa G. FrancoPlatonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends by Dr. Marisa G. Franco Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  5. Oct 1

    If You Are Multi-Passionate, This Will Give You Confidence

    Being multi-passionate can challenge your confidence and sense of self. But what if having a million interests, ideas, and curiosities isn’t something you need to fix? In this episode, Mary explores why embracing your full range might be the key to greater confidence, creativity, and self-trust. Tune into our self-love podcast to learn… Why being multipassionate can make you feel behindWhat the Renaissance can teach us about curiosity, creativity, and refusing to be defined by just one area of expertiseThe woman Mary considers a modern-day example of embracing a wildly diverse range of interestsWhat multi-passionate people need to thriveHow bringing the different parts of yourself together can help you feel more wholeMary also shares advice for how to build a career and life as a multi-passionate person, from giving yourself permission to experiment to finding stability that allows you to take creative risks. She explores why transferable skills, connecting seemingly unrelated ideas, and making yourself more visible can unlock opportunities for multi-passionate people. Remember: You don’t have to choose one version of yourself in order to have confidence in who you are. Your curiosity, creativity, and seemingly unrelated interests might be the very things that make you uniquely you. Hopefully this episode will boost your confidence around being multi-passionate. Mentioned In This Episode... The Marginalian by Maria Popova: themarginalian.org No Bad Parts by Dr. Richard Schwartz Deepen your self love journey with Mary’s books: The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook to help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts for calming self-criticism and learning to love yourself.Follow Mary's self love journey on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast And if you’re enjoying Mary’s Cup of Tea, share it with the women in your life! Your support helps spread the gift of self-love! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  6. Sep 24

    How To Trust Yourself Again with Hilary Hahn

    We all know what it feels like to be hard on ourselves, question whether we're good enough, or let someone else's opinion become our own inner voice. All of this comes down to self-trust. In this deeply personal conversation, three-time Grammy Award-winning violinist Hilary Hahn (!!!) and I talk about self-worth, perfectionism, creativity, long-term dedication to your craft, and the lifelong process of learning to trust yourself. Hilary shares what decades of performing have taught her about self-trust, quieting her inner critic, finding her own style, and staying connected to the parts of herself that exist beyond achievement. You will learn… How perfectionism can disconnect you from your creativity, and what Hilary has learned about letting go of the need to get everything exactly “right”Why self-worth cannot depend on awards, praise, or other people's opinions, and how to recognize the voices you've internalizedWhat performing has taught Hilary about self-trust, presence, and getting out of your own headWhy your imperfections may actually be part of what makes your work and your presence more authentic and humanHow to cultivate creativity by giving yourself time to think, experiment, process, and develop your own ideasWhat it means to stay committed to your craftRemember: Your self-worth does not have to be earned through achievement or perfection. Self-trust grows when you learn to listen to your own voice, recognize what you value about yourself, and give yourself permission to be fully human. Hilary Hahn is a three-time GRAMMY Award-winning violinist known for her expressive musicality, technical expertise, and curiosity both within and beyond the classical music world. She has commissioned and championed works by more than 40 living composers, while her recordings have earned some of the highest honors in the music world. She also created #100daysofpractice, a social media initiative that has transformed practicing into a community celebration of creativity and artistic development, with more than one million posts shared by performers and students. She currently serves on the string faculty at Juilliard and continues to perform, record, commission new works, and connect with audiences around the world. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with the women in your life! Or on social media! Be sure to tag @maryspodcast and @violincase. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  7. Sep 17

    The Science of Self-Love: Why Being Kinder to Yourself Actually Works

    There’s a lot more to self-love than feeling good about yourself. Though self-compassion is clearly associated with better mental health, stronger relationships, healthier behaviors, and greater resilience, the interesting part of the research is what happens underneath all of that: how changing the way you relate to yourself can actually change the way you behave, especially when you fail, struggle, or suffer. So let’s dive into the science of self-love and self-compassion to uncover some surprising ways they can change your motivation, emotional regulation, and relationship with failure. Tune into our self-love podcast to learn… Why self-compassion may be more stable than self-esteem, and why constantly evaluating yourself can get in the way of feeling good about yourselfWhether positive affirmations can be too positive, and why believing you’re exceptional might make failure feel even scarierWhy being kinder to yourself can actually make you more motivated to improve after you mess upHow your inner voice can work more like a supportive coach than a drill sergeantWhy self-compassion may help us regulate uncomfortable emotions and stop putting off things we know are good for usWhy something can feel comforting when you say it to yourself but completely insensitive when someone else says it to you, especially during griefWe’ll also get into a surprising question: do you have to think highly of yourself in order to love yourself? The science suggests there may be another way to feel secure in yourself, one that doesn’t require being the prettiest, smartest, most successful, or most impressive person in the room. Remember: self-love isn’t about convincing yourself that everything is great. Self-love is about building a relationship with yourself that allows you to be imperfect, learn from your mistakes, and keep going LONG ENOUGH TO GET BETTER. Mentioned In This Episode... Kristin Neff’s review of the research on self-compassionNeff & Vonk (2009), self-compassion and self-esteemBreines & Chen (2012), self-compassion and motivation after failureResearch on inflated praise and self-esteemResearch on self-compassion and bedtime procrastinationResearch on cultural differences in self-compassionResearch on grief support and messages after a deathResearch on helpful and unhelpful grief supportHeart rate variability and the HeartMath techniqueDeepen your self love journey with Mary’s books: The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook to help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts for calming self-criticism and learning to love yourself.Follow Mary's self love journey on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast And if you’re enjoying Mary’s Cup of Tea, share it with the women in your life! Your support helps spread the gift of self-love! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

  8. Sep 10

    What It Means to Love Yourself in a World That Wounds You with Dr. Thema Bryant

    Learning to love yourself can be complicated when the world around you keeps sending messages that you’re not worthy of self-love. Today we are joined by Dr. Thema Bryant to explore how racism, colorism, generational trauma, and survival strategies can shape the way we see ourselves. You will learn… How Dr. Thema’s childhood in Baltimore and time living in Liberia shaped her confidence and self-esteemHow to help young girls be more resilient to beauty standardsThe difference between personal, intergenerational, and collective trauma, and how survival strategies can be passed down through generationsHow to recognize when you’re living in survival mode, even when your life may look successful from the outsideWhy you can begin to heal and cultivate joy even while living in circumstances that continue to challenge youWhy some of our deepest healing happens in healthy relationships, community, and through dance, music, and movement  Remember: You don’t have to wait for the world to become perfectly safe before you begin to love yourself. Healing can mean learning to stay connected to yourself while continuing to navigate an imperfect world. Dr. Thema Bryant is a psychologist, author, professor, sacred artist, and minister who is leading the way in creating healthy relationships, healing traumas, and overcoming stress and oppression. Her life changing books include Matters of the Heart, Homecoming, Reclaim Yourself: The Homecoming Workbook, and The Antiracism Handbook: Practical Tools to Shift Your Mindset and Uproot Racism in Your Life and Community. Her work empowers readers to connect with themselves and others while exploring mental health, relationships, trauma, and liberation. Get Dr. Thema's new book, Matter of the Heart: https://drthema.com/matters-of-the-heart/ Dr. Thema completed her doctorate in Clinical Psychology at Duke University and her post-doctoral training at Harvard Medical Center’s Victims of Violence Program. She is currently a tenured professor of psychology at Pepperdine University, where she directs the Culture and Trauma Research Laboratory. Dr. Thema is also an ordained elder in the African Methodist Episcopal Church and leads the mental health ministry at First A.M.E. Church in Los Angeles. In 2023, she served as president of the American Psychological Association and is the host of The Homecoming Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with the women in your life! Or on social media! Be sure to tag @maryspodcast and @dr.thema Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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About

Welcome to Self Love. We cover topics surrounding self love including body-image, confidence, self-worth, body positivity, mindset, mental health, feminism, relationships, and so much more. Along the way, your host Mary lets you in on her personal life, never shying away from the messy, raw, and real conversations that we all crave. So grab a cup of tea, slide in your headphones, and get ready for some self-lovin!

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