The Inner Compass Podcast with Vanessa Bennett

Gamut Podcast Network
  • 4.8 (282)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

NEW PODCAST SERIES HOSTED BY VANESSA BENNETT Vanessa Bennett, LMFT, is a licensed depth psychotherapist, author, and facilitator known for her no-nonsense yet compassionate approach to healing. She’s the author of The Motherhood Myth and coauthor of It’s Not Me, It’s You, and the founder of Inner Compass Academy. She hosts the Inner Compass Podcast, where she explores the intersection of depth psychology, relationships, and cultural conditioning to support personal and collective liberation.

  1. 4d ago

    God Is Change: Trust, Impermanence, and Learning to Stay Present

    What if trusting life doesn’t mean trusting that everything will become stable, coherent, or reassuring? In this episode, Vanessa explores change as both a spiritual and psychological problem: why we confuse trust with continuity, why change can feel like abandonment, and what it means to stay in relationship with reality as it keeps moving. Through Octavia Butler’s “God is Change,” Heraclitus, Buddhist impermanence, process theology, attachment theory, meaning-making research, and Jungian transformation, we look at the grief and freedom of releasing the fantasy that life’s job is to preserve the forms we love. Trust is not certainty that everything will work out; it is the willingness to remain present with what is real as it changes form. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. Join the ICA Summit → https://www.vanessabennett.com/ica-summit Reference Links: Octavia Butler — Parable of the Sower / Earthseed Use for: “God is Change,” Earthseed, and the idea that change is the central theological principle in Parable of the Sower. Link: https://www.octaviabutler.com/the-books Note: Use this as the primary author/book reference for Octavia Butler and Parable of the Sower. Earthseed / “God Is Change” Use for: Earthseed’s core principle that God is Change and the related idea that God can be shaped. Link: https://godischange.org/shape-god/ Note: Useful accessible reference for the Earthseed language. If quoting directly, confirm wording against the text of Parable of the Sower. Heraclitus — Flux / River Fragment Use for: Heraclitus’s idea that reality is in flux, often summarized through the river fragment. Link: https://iep.utm.edu/heraclit/ Note: The Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy is a reliable philosophy reference for Heraclitus and the doctrine of flux. Attachment Theory Overview Use for: Secure attachment as a reliable base for exploration, regulation, and return. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4085672/ Note: Broad overview of attachment theory, including Bowlby and Ainsworth. Intolerance of Uncertainty Use for: Uncertainty as a transdiagnostic process associated with anxiety, worry, rigidity, avoidance, and distress. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4204511/ Note: Useful research review on intolerance of uncertainty and its role across anxiety and related conditions. Crystal Park — Meaning-Making After Stressful Events Use for: Stressful events disrupting global beliefs/goals and the process of meaning-making after rupture. Link: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20192563/ Note: Crystal L. Park’s 2010 review on meaning-making and adjustment to stressful life events. Buddhist Impermanence / Anicca Use for: Impermanence as one of the three marks of existence in Buddhist philosophy. Link: https://www.bps.lk/olib/wh/wh186_Nyanaponika-etal_Three-Basic-Facts-of-Existence--I-Anicca.html Note: Buddhist Publication Society resource on anicca / impermanence. Three Marks of Existence Use for: Impermanence, suffering/unsatisfactoriness, and non-self as core Buddhist teachings. Link: https://www.britannica.com/topic/anicca Note: Accessible reference for anicca as impermanence in Buddhist thought. Alfred North Whitehead — Process Theology / “Fellow-Sufferer Who Understands” Use for: Process theology and God as relationally present within the becoming of the world. Link: https://processandfaith.org/becoming-christ-like-heathens/ Note: This page quotes Whitehead’s famous phrase from Process and Reality: “God is the great companion—the fellow-sufferer who understands.” Process Theology Overview Use for: General overview of process theology and Whitehead’s influence. Link: https://iep.utm.edu/processp/ Note: Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy overview of process philosophy/theology. C. G. Jung — Symbols of Transformation Use for: Jungian transformation, symbolic death, dissolution, renewal, and the psychological meaning of transformation symbols. Link: https://iaap.org/resources/academic-resources/collected-works-abstracts/volume-5-symbols-transformation/ Note: IAAP summary of Jung’s Collected Works, Volume 5: Symbols of Transformation. James Hollis — The Provisional Life / The Middle Passage Use for: The “provisional life,” the placeholder self, and midlife/disruptive transitions exposing lives built around adaptation rather than truth. Link: https://jameshollis.net/project/the-middle-passage/ Note: Use as a general reference for Hollis’s work on midlife passage and the provisional life. If using the exact phrase “provisional life,” confirm against the relevant Hollis text or audio. Spiritual Bypassing — John Welwood Use for: Spiritual bypassing as using spiritual ideas/practices to avoid unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, or developmental tasks. Link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-seekers-forum/202303/what-is-spiritual-bypassing Note: John Welwood coined the term spiritual bypassing; use this for accessible definition and background. Earthseed / “Shape God” Use for: Butler’s idea that change can be consciously shaped rather than merely endured. Link: https://godischange.org/shape-god/ Note: Include if show notes mention “Shape God” or conscious participation with change. Confirm any direct quote against Butler’s novel. Octavia Butler / Parable of the Sower — Publisher Page Use for: Basic book reference for Parable of the Sower. Link: https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/octavia-e-butler/parable-of-the-sower/9781538732182/ Note: Publisher page for the book; good clean link for listeners. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  2. Jul 20

    Fear Belongs: Why Healing Isn’t Becoming Fearless

    If you have ever felt fear in your body and then immediately made that fear mean something bad about you, this episode is for you. Vanessa explores fear not as something to conquer, transcend, or shame, but as something ancient, intelligent, protective, and deeply human. Through polyvagal theory, Buddhist psychology, the teaching of the first and second arrow, RAIN practice, and self-compassion, we look at what changes when we stop treating fear like the enemy. Healing is not becoming fearless; it is becoming less afraid of fear itself, so you can stay with yourself when it arrives. Join the ICA Summit → https://www.vanessabennett.com/ica-summit Reference Links: Stephen Porges — Polyvagal Theory Use for: Polyvagal theory, autonomic regulation, and the nervous system’s safety/danger responses. Link: https://www.stephenporges.com/ Note: Stephen Porges developed polyvagal theory, which is referenced in the episode to explain why fear often arises before conscious thought can intervene. Polyvagal Institute — What Is Polyvagal Theory? Use for: Accessible overview of polyvagal theory and autonomic regulation. Link: https://www.polyvagalinstitute.org/whatispolyvagaltheory Note: Helpful general explainer for producers/listeners who want a basic overview. Neuroception — Stephen Porges / Polyvagal Theory Use for: Neuroception as the nervous system’s subconscious detection of safety and threat. Link: https://www.stephenporges.com/ Note: Use alongside Porges’s work. If referencing neuroception specifically, describe it as the nervous system’s below-conscious scanning for cues of safety or danger. Buddhist Teaching — The First and Second Arrow Use for: The teaching that pain may be unavoidable, but the suffering we add on top of pain can compound it. Link: https://blog.tarabrach.com/2017/08/the-wisdom-of-its-not-my-fault-finding.html Note: Tara Brach explains the first and second arrow in accessible language. In this episode, fear is the first arrow; shame about fear is often the second. Tara Brach — RAIN Practice Use for: RAIN: Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture. Link: https://www.tarabrach.com/rain/ Note: Tara Brach describes RAIN as a mindfulness and compassion practice for working with difficult emotions. Jon Kabat-Zinn — Mindfulness Use for: Mindfulness as present-moment, nonjudgmental awareness. Link: https://www.mindful.org/jon-kabat-zinn-defining-mindfulness/ Note: Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, nonjudgmentally. Jon Kabat-Zinn — Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) Use for: MBSR as an 8-week mindfulness-based program developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3336928/ Note: This source identifies MBSR as developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn in 1979 and describes its use of mindfulness meditation to alleviate suffering. Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) Use for: MBCT as a mindfulness-based approach developed for relapse prevention in recurrent depression. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2834575/ Note: This article discusses MBCT and its evidence base, including reduced relapse rates in recurrent depression. MBCT — Segal, Williams, and Teasdale Use for: MBCT’s development by Zindel Segal, Mark Williams, and John Teasdale. Link: https://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/docs/default-source/members/sigs/spirituality-spsig/resources/spirituality-special-interest-group-publications-mark-williams-mindfulness-based-cognitive-therapy.pdf Note: This PDF discusses MBCT’s development and its use in preventing relapse and recurrence of depression. Rollo May — The Meaning of Anxiety Use for: Distinction between fear and anxiety; anxiety as a threat to something essential to the self. Link: https://open.baypath.edu/psy321book/chapter/c25p2/ Note: This source quotes May’s definition of anxiety as apprehension triggered by a threat to a value the individual holds essential to their existence as a personality. Dan Siegel — Window of Tolerance Use for: Window of tolerance as the zone where a person can process experience without becoming overwhelmed or shut down. Link: https://www.nicabm.com/trauma-how-to-help-your-clients-understand-their-window-of-tolerance/ Note: This is a practical clinical explainer of Siegel’s window of tolerance concept. Affect Labeling — Naming Emotions and Amygdala Activity Use for: Research on how naming an emotion can reduce emotional reactivity. Link: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17576282/ Note: Lieberman et al. found that affect labeling may diminish emotional reactivity through prefrontal-amygdala pathways. Affect Labeling and Reappraisal Use for: Additional research support that affect labeling is associated with decreased amygdala activity and reduced self-reported distress. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3970015/ Note: Useful follow-up source for the episode’s point that naming fear can help interrupt total identification with fear. Jack Kornfield — Turning Toward Fear with Compassion Use for: Buddhist psychology, compassion, and turning toward difficult experience rather than abandoning ourselves. Link: https://jackkornfield.com/fear/ Note: Use for the episode’s discussion of meeting fear with presence and compassion rather than exile. Bodhisattva Vow Use for: “All beings” as a compassion frame, including the frightened parts of ourselves. Link: https://tricycle.org/magazine/bodhisattva-vow/ Note: Use gently and broadly. This supports the episode’s point that compassion includes the frightened one inside us, not just others. Kristin Neff — Self-Compassion Use for: Self-compassion as self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. Link: https://self-compassion.org/what-is-self-compassion/ Note: Supports the episode’s discussion of bringing fear back into the circle of care rather than shaming it. Kristin Neff — Fierce Self-Compassion Use for: Fierce self-compassion as a boundary-setting, protective form of compassion. Link: https://self-compassion.org/blog/what-is-fierce-self-compassion/ Note: Supports the distinction between tender self-compassion and fierce self-compassion. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  3. Jul 13

    When Betrayal Breaks More Than Trust: How to Heal What the Relationship Broke

    Betrayal doesn’t only break trust in another person; it can also rupture your trust in yourself. In this episode, Vanessa explores why betrayal can feel so psychologically disorganizing, especially when harm comes from someone or something that was supposed to feel safe. We talk about betrayal trauma, betrayal blindness, attachment injury, projection, reality testing, and why not every devastating feeling is the same kind of event. The deeper healing is not becoming harder or more armored, but learning how to grieve specifically, see more clearly, and trust yourself again. Reference Links: Jennifer Freyd — Betrayal Trauma Theory Use for: Betrayal trauma theory; harm from someone or something a person depends on or trusts. Link: https://dynamic.uoregon.edu/jjf/defineBT.html Note: Freyd’s site defines betrayal trauma and includes betrayal blindness. Jennifer Freyd — Betrayal Blindness Use for: Why people may not fully register betrayal when they depend on the person, institution, or system doing harm. Link: https://dynamic.uoregon.edu/jjf/defineBT.html Note: The site describes betrayal blindness as unawareness, not-knowing, and forgetting that can preserve relationships, institutions, or systems people depend on. Jennifer Freyd — Research Overview Use for: General background on Freyd’s concepts, including betrayal trauma, betrayal blindness, DARVO, institutional betrayal, and institutional courage. Link: https://www.jjfreyd.com/about-research Note: Helpful author/researcher page for show notes. Sue Johnson / Emotionally Focused Therapy — Attachment Injury Use for: Attachment injury and emotionally focused therapy as a framework for repairing relational ruptures. Link: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/6644242_Resolving_Attachment_Injuries_in_Couples_Using_Emotionally_Focused_Therapy_Steps_Toward_Forgiveness_and_Reconciliation Note: Makinen and Johnson’s 2006 paper, Resolving Attachment Injuries in Couples Using Emotionally Focused Therapy. Emotionally Focused Therapy / Attachment-Based Healing Use for: Sue Johnson’s attachment-based framework for couples, emotional connection, and secure bonding. Link: https://psychwire.com/free-resources/q-and-a/17qfr27/emotionally-focused-therapy-and-attachment-based-healing Note: Accessible overview of Sue Johnson’s EFT frame. Peter Fonagy / Mentalization Use for: Mentalization as the capacity to understand behavior in terms of mental states: thoughts, feelings, needs, desires, intentions, and motivations. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7009316/ Note: This article gives a clear definition of mentalization and cites Fonagy/Bateman’s work. ScienceDirect — Mentalization Overview Use for: Simple definition of mentalization as understanding one’s own and others’ behavior in terms of internal mental states. Link: https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/psychology/mentalization Note: Useful if producer wants a quick explanatory reference. John Gottman — Trust Metric Use for: Gottman’s idea that trust can be evaluated and is central to relationship stability. Link: https://www.gottman.com/blog/trust/ Note: Gottman Institute article explaining the “trust metric.” John Gottman — Trust and Betrayal Metrics Use for: Trust/betrayal metrics and the idea that small everyday moments can build or erode trust. Link: https://www.gottman.com/blog/what-makes-love-last-inside-the-love-lab/ Note: Gottman Institute article referencing both trust and betrayal metrics. John Gottman — Building Trust Through Attunement Use for: Trust as built through awareness, tolerance, turning toward, understanding, non-defensive listening, and empathy. Link: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-3-phases-of-love/ Note: Useful for the part of the episode about trust being built through consistency, attunement, and repair over time. John Bowlby / Attachment Theory Overview Use for: Secure base, early bonds, and foundational attachment theory. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4085672/ Note: Broad overview of attachment theory and Bowlby/Ainsworth foundations. Earned Secure Attachment Use for: Adults with insecure early attachment histories developing more secure attachment through reflective and relational work. Link: https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/psychology/earned-secure-attachment Note: Use as a broad reference for earned secure attachment. If producer needs a primary citation, ask for access to the Adult Attachment Interview / Mary Main literature. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  4. Jul 6

    Re-Nature with Clara Schroeder: Ecotherapy, Climate Grief, and Healing Our Bond with Nature

    In this episode, Vanessa sits down with Clara Schroeder, ecotherapist and author of Re-Nature: How Nature Helps Us Feel Better and Do Better, for a conversation about ecopsychology, climate grief, ritual, and the healing intelligence of the natural world. Together they explore why “we are nature” is not just a poetic idea, but a psychological and spiritual reality - and how separation from the earth mirrors separation from self, body, belonging, and ritual. They also discuss nature as a co-regulating presence, the specific grief that can follow climate or human-caused ecological disasters, and what it means to repair our attachment with the original mother. This is a conversation about remembering that nature is not outside of us; it is one of the oldest relationships we have. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. Resources mentioned: Re-Nature by Clara Schroeder Use for: Guest’s book, Re-Nature: How Nature Helps Us Feel Better and Do Better. Link: https://www.claraschroeder.com/book Note: Clara’s site describes the book as exploring nature connection, mental health, resilience, climate disruption, and sustainable action. Ecopsychology / Theodore Roszak Use for: Defining ecopsychology as the bridge between psychology and ecology / the human psyche and the natural world. Link: https://www.ebsco.com/research-starters/psychology/ecopsychology Note: Useful general background on ecopsychology and its association with Theodore Roszak’s The Voice of the Earth. Nature exposure and health Use for: Research support that exposure to natural environments is associated with decreased anxiety, rumination, and other mental health benefits. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8125471/ Note: Review article on associations between nature exposure and health. Nature relatedness and mental health Use for: Research support that stronger nature relatedness is associated with fewer symptoms of depression, anxiety, and stress. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6069224/ Note: Helpful support for the episode’s claim that relationship with nature matters for mental health. Connectedness to Nature Scale Use for: Research on emotional / experiential connection to the natural world. Link: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/222621038_The_Connectedness_to_Nature_Scale_A_Measure_of_Individuals%27_Feeling_in_Community_with_Nature Note: Mayer and Frantz’s Connectedness to Nature Scale is a common measure in environmental psychology. Andy Goldsworthy quote Use for: “We often forget that we are nature. Nature is not something separate from us…” Link: https://www.theartstory.org/artist/goldsworthy-andy/ Note: This is a cleaner source than Goodreads for the quote used in the episode. Lisa Miller / Spirituality Mind Body Institute Use for: Lisa Miller’s work on spirituality, psychology, and the science of spiritual awareness. Link: https://www.tc.columbia.edu/faculty/lfm14/ Note: This confirms Lisa Miller as Professor of Psychology and Education at Teachers College, Columbia University, and founder of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute. Lisa Miller — The Awakened Brain Use for: Background on spirituality, resilience, and mental health. Link: https://www.lisamillerphd.com/ Note: Important: I would not use wording that says Lisa Miller “proved synchronicities are real” unless you have a specific source from her work that says that directly. Safer wording: “Lisa Miller’s work explores the science of spirituality and awakened awareness.” Fractal patterns and stress reduction Use for: Nature’s fractal patterns and stress/mental fatigue reduction. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8416160/ Note: Supports the episode’s discussion of repeated natural patterns and nervous system regulation. Disaster / climate-related mental health Use for: Mental health consequences of disasters, including trauma, anxiety, and depression. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11430943/ Note: Broad support for the climate grief / disaster recovery part of the conversation. Forest therapy after wildfire disaster Use for: Nature-based, community-centered support after wildfire or disaster. Link: https://natureandhealth.uw.edu/publications/forest-therapy-as-a-trauma-informed-approach-to-disaster-recovery-insights-from-a-wildfire-affected-community/ Note: Useful support for nature connection as part of disaster recovery. Nature attachment theory Use for: Nature as an attachment figure / the human-nature bond through an attachment theory lens. Link: https://eresearch.qmu.ac.uk/handle/20.500.12289/14214 Note: Useful support for the “Mother Nature / original mother / attachment wound” portion of the episode. Attachment theory overview Use for: Bowlby, Ainsworth, secure base, attachment needs, and early bonds. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4085672/ Note: Good general research overview on attachment theory and secure base. Clarissa Pinkola Estés — Women Who Run With the Wolves / life-death-life cycle Use for: Life-death-life cycle, instinctual nature, and the archetypal feminine frame. Link: https://bookshop.org/p/books/women-who-run-with-the-wolves-clarissa-pinkola-estes/9929947 Note: The concept is from Estés’s Women Who Run With the Wolves. I did not find a high-quality free source with the full concept explained, so best to cite the book directly rather than a secondary blog. Human evolution / Homo sapiens Use for: Vanessa’s comment that humans have existed far longer than modern attachment theory / nuclear-family assumptions. Link: https://humanorigins.si.edu/evidence/human-fossils/species/homo-sapiens Note: Smithsonian source states Homo sapiens have lived from about 300,000 years ago to the present. Connect with Claire: Clara’s website: https://www.claraschroeder.com/ Book page: https://www.claraschroeder.com/book Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/livingwithclarity/ Book Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ReNatureBook/ Substack: https://claraschroeder.substack.com/ If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  5. Jul 1

    Are You Actually Healing, or Are You Trying to Become More Acceptable?

    What if some of what we call healing is actually an argument with the Self? In this episode, Vanessa explores the fantasy that enough therapy, coaching, spirituality, or self-development will eventually turn us into someone without friction: endlessly patient, available, social, regulated, and easy to love. Through Jung’s ideas of persona, Self, and shadow, along with research on self-discrepancy, ACT, self-compassion, and self-concept clarity, we look at the grief of realizing the idealized self may never arrive. The invitation is not resignation, but reality contact: meeting the actual self with enough honesty and tenderness to build a life that finally fits. Take the quiz here https://www.vanessabennett.com/space-holder-quiz Reference Links: • Carl Jung — Persona Use for: Persona as the social face / adaptation to society. Link: https://iaap.org/jung-analytical-psychology/short-articles-on-analytical-psychology/persona-2/ Note: This supports the episode’s distinction between persona/social acceptability and deeper wholeness. • Carl Jung — Shadow Use for: Shadow as hidden or repressed parts of the personality, including not only “dark” material but also instincts, reactions, insights, and creative impulses. Link: https://www.thesap.org.uk/articles-on-jungian-psychology-2/about-analysis-and-therapy/the-shadow/ Note: This supports the reframe that the shadow can include disowned sensitivity, need, rest, introversion, and unlived life. • E. Tory Higgins — Self-Discrepancy Theory Use for: Actual self, ideal self, and ought self; different emotional effects of falling short of the ideal vs ought self. Link: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/19545638_Self-Discrepancy_A_Theory_Relating_Self_and_Affect Note: Original 1987 theory connecting self-discrepancy with affect. • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy / Psychological Flexibility Use for: Acceptance as reality contact, not resignation; psychological flexibility as staying in contact with the present while moving toward values. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3635495/ Note: Useful source for ACT and psychological flexibility. • Kristin Neff — Self-Compassion Use for: Self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness as the three core components of self-compassion. Link: https://self-compassion.org/what-is-self-compassion/ Note: Supports the episode’s point that acceptance without warmth can still become contempt. • D. W. Winnicott — The Capacity to Be Alone Use for: The capacity to be alone as developing through the experience of being alone in the presence of another. Link: https://pep-web.org/search/document/IJP.039.0416A Note: Supports the idea of presence without performance or agenda. • Campbell et al. — Self-Concept Clarity Use for: Self-concept clarity as clear, confident, consistent, and stable self-beliefs. Link: https://www2.psych.ubc.ca/~heine/docs/1996scc.pdf Note: Original 1996 paper on self-concept clarity. • Self-Concept Clarity and Subjective Well-Being Use for: Research linking self-concept clarity with well-being. Link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10064969/ Note: Helpful current/recent support for the wellbeing connection. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  6. Jun 24

    The Sacred Was Never Separate From the Body

    If you say you want to feel more embodied, but what you really mean is “I want my body to calm down enough so I can keep functioning,” this episode is for you. Vanessa explores the body not as a problem to solve or a machine to manage, but as intelligence, using the archetype of Gaia as a map for rhythm, instinct, descent, and embodied truth. We talk about productivity culture, chronic override, interoception, allostatic load, and why the body often interrupts the life the mind keeps trying to defend. The invitation is not to transcend the body, but to become honest enough to let the body tell the truth about the life you’re actually living. For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  7. Jun 15

    The Burden of Consciousness: The Exhaustion of Being Self-Aware

    If you can name the pattern in real time—"I’m projecting, I’m shutting down, this is my attachment stuff"—and still feel unable to stop the behavior, this episode is for you. Vanessa explores the burden of consciousness: the exhaustion of being aware when insight has outrun integration, and the nervous system hasn’t caught up to what the mind can explain. We unpack why the observer can become its own persona (or even a defense), how awareness turns into self-surveillance, and why “more insight” isn’t the solution—more capacity is. The shift is when awareness stops being something you do to yourself and becomes something you do for yourself.  For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

  8. Jun 8

    When Women Stop Trusting Their Own Knowing: Intuition, Anxiety, and Discernment

    If you’ve ever felt something in your body long before you had language for it, and then immediately started talking yourself out of it, this episode is for you. Vanessa Bennett explores how women are conditioned to distrust instinct, often becoming the first ones to disbelieve themselves. She explains why this isn’t accidental, it’s socialization and policing. Using Jung’s frame on intuition and the Cassandra archetype, we unpack the difference between intuition, anxiety, trauma activation, and projection. We also explore why “not irrational, early” is a more honest way to name what the body registers. The repair starts with relationship: rebuilding somatic literacy, pausing before self-gaslighting, and letting the signal matter before you have a PowerPoint’s worth of proof.  For educational purposes only. This isn’t therapy. If you want to go deeper, check out the written companion on Substack and explore community + training at https://www.vanessaBennett.com. Additional Resources Explore: VanessaBennett.com Book: The Motherhood Myth Community: Inner Compass Collective Training: Inner Compass Academy Connect with Inner Compass Follow on Instagram Connect with Vanessa Bennett: Follow on Instagram Follow on TikTok Learn more on Substack Connect with Vanessa Bennett on LinkedIn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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About

NEW PODCAST SERIES HOSTED BY VANESSA BENNETT Vanessa Bennett, LMFT, is a licensed depth psychotherapist, author, and facilitator known for her no-nonsense yet compassionate approach to healing. She’s the author of The Motherhood Myth and coauthor of It’s Not Me, It’s You, and the founder of Inner Compass Academy. She hosts the Inner Compass Podcast, where she explores the intersection of depth psychology, relationships, and cultural conditioning to support personal and collective liberation.

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