Starve the Ego Feed the Soul

Nico Barraza

A podcast covering everything about the most important subject you'll ever study, yourself. Real people, real conversations, discussing the real things that matter. Tune in for your weekly dose of introspection. Please send all inquiries to coaching@nicobarraza.com

  1. 5D AGO

    What If “The One” Is Someone You Become? with Kelsey Grant

    What if “the one” isn’t a person you find but a capacity you grow into? That question drives our heart-forward conversation with relationship coach and musician Kelsey Grant as we separate fear from truth, chemistry from compatibility, and secrecy from the kind of honesty that actually deepens love. We start where most dating advice ends: inside. If you can map your partner’s patterns but can’t name your own feelings, you’re flying blind. Kelsey shows us how introspection reveals whether “something’s missing” is a saboteur or a signal, and why starving attraction to preserve safety only pushes desire into the shadows. From there we widen the lens. Dating apps aren’t destiny; your inputs shape your worldview. Kelsey shares how unplugging from viral cynicism, touching grass, and engaging serendipity can transform how—and where—you meet compatible people. Fate sets the collision, she says, but free will writes the story. Multiple true loves can and do exist across a lifetime, each one preparing us to hold a fuller, freer partnership. We go straight at the tender stuff too: what to do when you feel drawn to someone while you’re committed. The answer isn’t panic or secrecy. It’s clean communication, pre-agreed boundaries, and running honest diagnostics on the relationship you already have. If a core nutrient is missing and cannot be cultivated, completion can be the most loving move for both people. Along the way, we trade checklists for character, talk emotional sobriety, and use a musician’s ear to tell wound resonance from heart resonance—the felt harmony that’s equal parts peace and aliveness. If you’re ready to replace fantasy with clarity, widen your field without abandoning your integrity, and treat relationships as a school for becoming, this conversation will give you language, practices, and courage. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help more people find the show. Support the show Warmly, Nico Barraza @FeedTheSoulNB www.nicobarraza.com

    1h 8m
  2. FEB 16

    One Small Step. The Body Remembers. The Soul Decides. with Dr. Mike Meaney

    I welcome my childhood friend Dr. Mike Meaney back on the show where we discuss how pain changes how a life moves. It sharpens every edge, tests every bond, and forces you to decide what you believe when there are no easy choices left. That’s where our conversation begins: a candid account of failed orthopedic surgeries, a system that too often rewards the cut over the cure, and the daily reality of living inside a body that won’t stop hurting. We examine how fee-for-service medicine, device royalties, and surgical center ownership can bend decisions, why second and third opinions matter, and what patients can do to avoid becoming a statistic in a volume-driven industry. From there, we turn toward the inner struggle—resentment, justice, and the long road to healing. We talk openly about opioids as a seductive solution to the human problem of physical pain, and the devastation they leave behind. We sit with the hardest question: when harm is done under anesthesia, what does forgiveness mean? Faith enters not as a slogan but as a practice. We return to the simple Catholic teachings we learned as kids—tell the truth, avoid violence, treat others as you wish to be treated, care for the marginal—and measure them against adult complexity. We explore the mystical claims of Christianity with clear eyes, and why daily sobriety can feel like proof enough for belief. Then we build forward. Our guest shares One Small Step, a platform delivering certified peer support on nights and weekends for people on Medicaid—exactly when the rest of the system is closed or the ER is the only option. We walk through how human-in-the-loop AI can safely triage, detect pre-crisis signals, and route people to real peers with lived experience, reducing avoidable ER visits and giving support that actually meets people where they are. It’s a practical blueprint for reform: dignified care, data-informed decisions, and a focus on outcomes that matter. If this conversation resonates—about pain, faith, accountability, or access to real help—share it with someone who needs it. And if you appreciate these deep, unfiltered talks, tap follow, leave a quick review, and tell us: where do you draw the line between justice and mercy? To learn more about One Small Step head over to https://onesmallstep.io/ Support the show Warmly, Nico Barraza @FeedTheSoulNB www.nicobarraza.com

    2h 5m
  3. 08/09/2025

    The Healing Gap: Why Both Men and Women Must Own Their Work

    The divide between men and women has never been more pronounced in our culture, especially when it comes to who bears responsibility for healing relationship wounds. Drawing from years of experience as a counselor and my own personal journey, I tackle the dangerous tendency to place blame solely on one gender while absolving the other. Most relationship discourse online falls into one of two extremes – either men need to do all the emotional work while women are already evolved, or women are manipulative while men are just logical beings responding to provocation. Both narratives miss the fundamental truth that healing requires mutual accountability. As someone who's witnessed countless therapy sessions where men and women voice remarkably similar complaints about their partners, I can attest that shadow work isn't gender-specific. What makes someone truly attractive goes beyond physical appearance or social status – it's their commitment to self-awareness, their ability to own their past without blaming others, and their courage to remain open despite previous hurts. This balance of strength and vulnerability creates a magnetic presence that transcends conventional attractiveness. The "Holy Trinity," as I playfully call it, is emotional maturity, a good heart, and yes – physical attraction matters too. My personal battle with chronic pain following botched surgeries has taught me that making excuses never empowers us – only taking action does. The same principle applies to our relationships. We can't control how others show up, but we can control our own healing journey. When both partners commit to doing 100% of their own work rather than a transactional 50/50 split, relationships transform from battlegrounds into sacred spaces of growth. Are you ready to move beyond blame and into the challenging but rewarding space of mutual healing? Share this episode with someone who needs to hear this message, and let's start building relationships where we rise together rather than tear each other down. Head over to https://tangem.com/en/ and use code "feedthesoul" for a large discount on your first Crypto Cold Wallet and start investing in your financial future today. Use code feedthesoul at https://seoulandsoil.com/ for a discount on the best handcrafted, no BS skincare products in the USA.  Support the show Warmly, Nico Barraza @FeedTheSoulNB www.nicobarraza.com

    24 min
  4. 07/28/2025

    Preparation Calms Fear: How Great Pilots Prepare for Life with Randall "Random" Brooks

    Head over to https://tangem.com/en/ and use code "feedthesoul" for a large discount on your first Crypto Cold Wallet and start investing in your financial future today. Randall "Random" Brooks shares his expertise on upset prevention and recovery training, revealing how proper pilot preparation for emergencies translates to valuable life skills and better decision-making under pressure. • Loss of control in flight is aviation's #1 killer, with aerodynamic stalls causing about 50% of these incidents • Pilots typically have only 6-10 seconds to respond correctly in an upset situation before it becomes unrecoverable • Traditional simulator training has critical gaps because it can't replicate the true physics or psychological stress of real emergencies • Building muscle memory and neural pathways through actual aircraft training helps pilots access their skills even under extreme stress • Aviation teaches valuable life skills including responsibility, judgment, teamwork, and emotional regulation • The most important factor in pilot performance is attitude – how badly you want it and what you're willing to put into it • APS training creates associations between verbal trigger words and physical actions to ensure pilots can respond correctly when startled Visit APStraining.com to learn more about aviation performance solutions and improving flight safety. More on Random here https://www.apstraining.com/team/brooks Support the show Warmly, Nico Barraza @FeedTheSoulNB www.nicobarraza.com

    59 min
  5. 07/21/2025

    The Authentic God Conversation: Rethinking Religion with Pastor CHARLIE MCCALLIE

    Head over to https://tangem.com/en/ and use code "feedthesoul" for a large discount on your first Crypto Cold Wallet and start investing in your financial future today. We explore the nature of spirituality and religion with Pastor Charlie McCallie in a wide-ranging conversation that challenges conventional thinking about God, faith, and human connection. • The episode opens with poetry from 11-year-old Beckam Atwood, highlighting the wisdom and depth young people often possess • Religion as a "force multiplier" that can exponentially increase both good and evil depending on how it's used • Four philosophical conceptions of God: as a being, as a super-being, as the ground of being, and as experience • How religious texts contain beautiful contradictions that prevent literal interpretations and encourage deeper engagement • Why questions and doubts serve as the foundation for authentic spirituality rather than obstacles to overcome • The problem of suffering as an entry point for spiritual growth rather than a reason to abandon belief • Jesus as a radical figure focused on love and inclusion rather than establishing an exclusive religion • How to build bridges with those we disagree with politically through radical love and empathy • Finding God in moments of human connection rather than abstract theological concepts Visit flagstaffcommons.com to hear Pastor Charlie's sermons or find the American Heretic podcast for more conversations on progressive Christianity. Support the show Warmly, Nico Barraza @FeedTheSoulNB www.nicobarraza.com

    1h 46m
4.9
out of 5
166 Ratings

About

A podcast covering everything about the most important subject you'll ever study, yourself. Real people, real conversations, discussing the real things that matter. Tune in for your weekly dose of introspection. Please send all inquiries to coaching@nicobarraza.com