The Leader in You

Connect your people; transform you culture. With Dr. Lola Gershfeld

The Leader in You podcast is brought to you by EmC Leaders, helping companies to master the art of relationships so they can spend less time on people issues and more time accomplishing their most important goals.  We combine the science of attachment and emotional connection with insight from the last 20 years to overcome workplace conflict issues, build strong team relationships, and create a connected culture.Your hosts, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian.

  1. 3d ago

    112. When Fear Does the Talking, Connection Gets Lost

    “You’re not tired.” “That’s not what happened.” “We’re doing it my way.” Could these everyday responses be quietly disconnecting us from the people who matter most? In this episode of The Leader in You, we explore how dismissing someone’s feelings can fuel conflict—and how patterns learned in childhood follow us into the workplace. From parenting moments to team disagreements and a discussion of royal family tensions, we unpack what happens when fear drives the conversation. Discover how slowing down, understanding your own emotional triggers, and replacing judgment with curiosity can help you break painful patterns and find your way back to connection. At work or at home, repair begins with making room for each other’s experience. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  2. Oct 21

    111. Bring Your Emotions to Work: Building Connected Teams | ATD OrgDev Recap

    What happens when leaders make emotional connection part of everyday work? In this episode of The Leader in You, hosts Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian welcome back Dr. Jaime Goff and Aric Bostick to reflect on their presentation at the ATD OrgDev Conference. Together, they explore how attachment science, emotional awareness, and small moments of connection can help leaders build trust and navigate difficult conversations. From understanding “now” and “later” responses to conflict to recognizing emotional triggers, the conversation offers practical ways to interrupt patterns that leave teams feeling stuck. Through personal stories and conference insights, they discuss how making time, staying curious, and helping others feel seen can strengthen relationships at work and at home. Tune in to discover how the Emotional Connection (EmC) process can help you slow down, tune in, and lead with greater connection. Connect with: Dr. Jaime Goff Aric Bostick  Watch our ATD OrgDev Conference presentation here.  The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  3. Oct 14

    110. Before the Difficult Conversation: Finding Your Emotional Balance

    What can you do when a conflict leaves you hurt, overwhelmed, or stuck—and the other person isn’t ready to talk? This week on The Leader in You, Paulina and Dr. Lola explore how to use the EmC Reconnection Process on your own to understand your emotions and prepare for a difficult conversation. Through a personal story, Dr. Lola walks through identifying triggers, recognizing sensitivities, naming feelings, and getting clear about the reassurance you need. Whether you tend to pull away or push harder during conflict, this episode offers a practical way to regain your balance and approach relationships at work and at home with greater clarity and courage. Grab your EmC journal or a piece of paper and follow along. Learn more at EmC Leaders. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  4. Sep 26

    108. We Had a Conflict at Dinner—Here’s What Happened Next | Aric Bostick

    What happens when three people who teach emotional connection actually find themselves in a real conflict together? In this episode of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola Gershfeld, Polina Marian, and returning guest Aric Bostick sit down in Reno after a dinner conversation unexpectedly turned into a moment of real disconnection. Rather than avoiding the tension, brushing it aside, or simply apologizing and moving on, they used the EmC Reconnection Process to slow the moment down and understand what was happening underneath the conflict. Aric shares openly about becoming triggered, recognizing the deeper raw spot behind his reaction, and what it felt like to experience repair in real time. Polina reflects on what she noticed in the interaction, while Lola explains how emotional triggers, attachment needs, and our automatic ways of protecting ourselves can quickly pull us into a negative cycle. Together, they explore why we sometimes take things personally, how past relational experiences can show up in present-day interactions, and why conflict itself is not necessarily the problem. The real question is: Do we know how to repair when connection is disrupted? You’ll also hear how the EmC Reconnection Process helps people move from the trigger to the deeper emotion, to understanding what each person needs in order to feel seen, valued, and connected again. This is not a conversation about conflict in theory. It is a real example of what can happen when people are willing to stay present, get curious, and work their way back to each other. Because strong relationships are not built by never getting disconnected. They are built by knowing how to reconnect. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  5. Sep 20

    107. When “I’m Fine” Isn’t Fine: How Leaders Can Create Safety When Someone Is Struggling

    Sometimes the words “I’m fine” mean exactly that. But sometimes, they are a way of covering hurt, fear, shame, or a sense of disconnection that feels too difficult to put into words. In recognition of Suicide Prevention Month, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore an important question: How can leaders create an environment where people feel safe enough to say when they are struggling? In this episode of The Leader in You, they discuss how emotional disconnection can lead people to withdraw, shut down, or convince themselves that what they are experiencing does not matter. Dr. Lola explains why leaders need to pay attention not only to what employees say, but also to the emotion underneath their words. Through practical examples and role-play, you’ll learn how to respond when someone says “It’s fine,” how to slow down difficult conversations rather than dismiss or immediately solve them, and how four simple responses—reflect, accept, validate, and reassure—can help another person feel heard, valued, and less alone. The conversation also explores why leadership is fundamentally about attunement: being able to recognize when connection has been disrupted and helping people regain a sense of safety and balance. Because sometimes the most important message a leader can communicate is simply: You matter. Your experience matters. And you don’t have to carry it alone. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  6. Sep 10

    106. From Conflict to Connection: Finding Emotional Balance at Work

    When your team is already overwhelmed, talking about emotions can feel like one more task. But what if those conversations are what help everyone regain focus and move forward? In this episode of The Leader in You, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore how the EMC process brings structure to difficult conversations, helping leaders move beyond blame and understand the emotions beneath workplace conflict. Through real workplace examples, they discuss recognizing triggers, interrupting negative cycles, and regaining your own emotional balance before helping others. They also explore how reassurance and repeated moments of connection can ease old hurts and build greater security in working relationships. Tune in to discover how everyday conflicts can become opportunities to strengthen trust, reconnect with your team, and lead with greater clarity. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

  7. Sep 3

    105. Why Feeling Seen Changes Everything: Aric Bostick on Attachment, Trust, and Resilience at Work

    What makes people feel safe enough to trust, connect, and thrive at work? In this episode, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian sit down with speaker and educator Aric Bostick to explore how attachment science can transform the way we think about leadership. Aric shares why he believes attachment is one of the missing pieces in building trust and resilience—and why a leader’s own sense of security can have a powerful impact on the people around them. Together, they explore what it means to become a source of security for others: being present and available, helping people feel seen, understanding the behaviors underneath disconnection, and creating relationships where people feel safe enough to be open, ask for what they need, and repair when things go wrong. The conversation also gets personal as Aric reflects on his own journey toward greater security and the role relationships, vulnerability, and repair have played along the way. It’s a lively and deeply human conversation about a simple but powerful idea: when leaders create security in relationships, people are better able to connect, trust, and become resilient. Connect with Aric Bostick: Learn more about Aric, his speaking, leadership training, and programs at AricBostick.com. The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where teams can thrive. Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.  CONNECT: EmC Leaders Facebook Twitter LinkedIn YouTube Channel RESOURCES: TESA - TEAM EMOTIONAL SAFETY ASSESSMENT RESOURCES & DOWNLOADS CONFLICT RESOLUTION MASTER PROGRAM CONTACT US Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld: LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld Instagram: @drlolaemc Connect with Polina Marian: LinkedIn: Polina Marian Instagram: @livewithfivekids Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team dynamics, and wo...

5
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About

The Leader in You podcast is brought to you by EmC Leaders, helping companies to master the art of relationships so they can spend less time on people issues and more time accomplishing their most important goals.  We combine the science of attachment and emotional connection with insight from the last 20 years to overcome workplace conflict issues, build strong team relationships, and create a connected culture.Your hosts, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian.

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