Cleave: The Podcast

Jon and Ashley Lefrandt
  • 5.0 (9)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

🌿 Cleave: The Podcast Hi! We’re Jon and Ashley Lefrandt. In Cleave, we explore what it means to hold fast—to God, to truth, and to each other. As devoted Latter-day Saints, we talk honestly about faith, family, healing, and the work of becoming one—in marriage, in discipleship, and in Christ. Here, we blend doctrine with real life: the messy, the redemptive, the beautiful. Whether you’re a believer, a seeker, or someone rebuilding faith from the ground up, this is a space for honest conversation and spiritual courage. Join us as we learn to cleave to truth, to love, and to what still matt

  1. 2D AGO · BONUS

    Here's the Lesson: When Family Loyalty Conflicts With Truth

    We’re often taught that faith means holding families together at all costs. But what happens when keeping the peace requires ignoring what’s true? In this episode of Here’s the Lesson, we talk about the tension many people quietly live in — loving their family while feeling pressured to stay silent about patterns that hurt them. Not rebellion. Not bitterness. Conscience. Jesus never taught that loyalty to family overrides truth. In fact, He warned that honesty would sometimes disrupt households. Not to destroy families, but to make healing possible. We explore:• the difference between forgiveness and access• why honesty often gets labeled disrespect• how guilt is used to maintain unhealthy patterns• and how to follow Christ without losing compassion or clarity If you’ve ever felt like the villain for telling the truth, this conversation is for you. Join the Weekly Note We send one short email each week expanding on these conversations — practical, grounded, and faith-centered. 👉 Join here: Link Support the Podcast If this episode resonated with you, follow the podcast and leave a review. It helps these conversations reach the people who feel alone in them.

    4 min

  2. 3D AGO

    Q&A #1: Toxic In-Laws, No Contact, Estranged Parents & Family Boundaries

    This episode is a listener Q&A — real situations people are living through right now. We talk through questions about toxic in-laws, going no contact with parents, when a spouse doesn’t see the problem, attending weddings or funerals during estrangement, and whether reconciliation is actually possible. These aren’t clinical answers. They’re the conversations we wish we could have sat in on when we were navigating it ourselves. Topics we cover: • Boundaries when your spouse disagrees with you• Starting low contact or no contact with parents• Parents changing the narrative to family members• Should you attend a wedding with estranged family?• Going to an estranged parent’s funeral• What reconciliation really requires If you’re trying to decide what is healthy vs guilt-driven in your family relationships — this episode will help you think clearly. Have a question you want us to cover in a future Q&A episode?Send it to us through the link below or DM us. We read every one. And if someone came to mind while listening, share this episode with them — sometimes language helps people have conversations they’ve been avoiding.

    32 min

  3. FEB 12

    Here's the Lesson: When “Don’t Gossip” Becomes Spiritual Abuse

    One of the most damaging misunderstandings in faith communities is the belief that talking about abuse is “gossip.” In this episode, we break down the critical difference between gossip and truth, and how spiritual language is often used—intentionally or unintentionally—to silence survivors, protect harmful systems, and keep abuse hidden. We explore: Why silence does not equal peace or holiness How abuse thrives when it’s mislabeled as “gossip” What scripture actually says about exposing darkness The difference between exposure, vengeance, and wisdom How faith can heal instead of control If you’ve ever been told to “just forgive,” “stop talking about it,” or “protect the family/church,” this episode offers clarity, validation, and a healthier framework for truth-telling. This conversation is for those navigating spiritual abuse, emotional manipulation, religious trauma, narcissistic family systems, and faith used to control rather than heal. Truth spoken with wisdom isn’t gossip.It’s the beginning of safety. 👉 Subscribe to our Weekly Note for reflections, resources, and episode drops designed to help you heal without losing your faith.

    4 min

  4. FEB 11 · BONUS

    Here's The Lesson: The Hardest Command Jesus Gave: Loving Those Who Hurt You

    Jesus once gave a command that feels almost impossible when you’ve been deeply hurt: “Love your enemies. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who despitefully use you and persecute you.” These words weren’t spoken to people in safe, healthy relationships.They were spoken to the wounded. The betrayed. Those who had every reason to harden their hearts. In this episode, we slow that teaching down. We talk about what Jesus was not asking—and what He was teaching about boundaries, prayer, bitterness, and remaining holy in unholy situations. We explore: Why prayer does not mean reconciliation or access What to do when you can’t walk away and no one believes you How Christ modeled this teaching from the cross itself And why loving your enemy is about preserving your soul—not excusing harm This conversation is not about spiritualizing abuse or silencing truth.It’s about discipleship that is honest, grounded, and anchored in Christ. If this episode resonates with you, we’d love to stay connected.👉 Subscribe to our Weekly Note for deeper reflections, episode updates, and resources for navigating faith, boundaries, and healing.👉 Follow us on social media @Leave_Then_Cleave to continue the conversation. You don’t have to carry this alone.And you don’t have to rush healing to be faithful.

    4 min

  5. FEB 10

    Here's the Lesson: Being the Peacemaker Might Be Why You’re Exhausted

    Being the “peacemaker” in a family is often praised — but in unhealthy systems, that role can quietly lead to anxiety, resentment, and exhaustion. In this Here’s the Lesson episode, we explore how peacemaking can shift from genuine reconciliation into emotional self-abandonment, especially in families shaped by control, conflict avoidance, or spiritual manipulation. If you learned to stay calm, smooth things over, or absorb tension so others didn’t have to — this conversation offers clarity without blame. We talk about: Why peacemaking often starts as survival The emotional cost of managing other people’s reactions How faith is sometimes used to confuse peace with silence Why Jesus told the truth even when it disrupted systems The difference between false peace and real peace This episode is for anyone navigating:family systems, emotional boundaries, spiritual abuse, people-pleasing, faith and healing, or the exhaustion that comes from always being “the calm one.” Peace isn’t the absence of conflict.It’s the presence of truth. Note: We are grateful you are here with us! If this episode resonated with you, we would love for you to leave a review or give us a follow here as well as on our social media channels. It will help our message reach more people like you.

    3 min

  6. FEB 9

    Episode 3. Forgiveness Isn’t Reconciliation: Why “Forgive and Forget” Keeps People Stuck

    Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood—and most weaponized—concepts in faith communities. In this episode, Jon and Ashley dismantle the damaging belief that forgiveness requires forgetting, excusing harm, or immediately reconciling with people who continue to hurt you. Drawing from their own journey through family estrangement, boundary-setting, and spiritual healing, they explore the critical distinction between forgiveness and reconciliation—and why confusing the two keeps people stuck in guilt, resentment, and unsafe relationships. You’ll hear: Why forgiveness is for you, not a free pass for others How “forgive and forget” is often used to avoid accountability Why you cannot forgive someone who is actively harming you How boundaries are not un-Christlike—but essential Why forgiveness is a process, not a moment How the Atonement of Jesus Christ applies not just to repentance—but to healing, grief, anger, and emotional trauma This conversation is especially for those navigating: Family estrangement or no-contact decisions Faith-based pressure to reconcile prematurely Guilt for “not forgiving fast enough” The emotional toll of repeated boundary violations Forgiveness does not mean access.Forgiveness does not erase truth.Forgiveness does not require reconciliation. It does require honesty, courage, and—often—time. If this episode resonated, we share deeper reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes insights in our Weekly Note.👉 Subscribe to our email list (click here) to stay grounded, informed, and supported. 🎧 Follow the PodcastIf you haven’t already, follow the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes on boundaries, faith, healing, marriage, and emotional maturity. 📲 Connect With Us on Social MediaWe share daily short-form teachings and conversations on Instagram and TikTok.Follow Leave Then Cleave for continued support between episodes. 💬 Reach OutIf you’re walking through something similar, you’re not alone. You’re always welcome to message us—we read far more than we can respond to, but we see you.

    47 min

  7. FEB 5

    Here's the Lesson: Forgiveness Isn’t What You Were Taught (and Why That Matters for Healing

    Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood teachings in faith communities — and for many people, that misunderstanding has caused more harm than healing. In this Here’s the Lesson episode, we explore why forgiveness has so often been taught as immediate reconciliation, emotional closure, or spiritual maturity — and how that definition leaves survivors feeling confused, ashamed, and unsafe. If your body still reacts, if setting boundaries feels necessary, or if forgiveness feels impossible right now, this episode offers clarity without condemnation. We talk about: The difference between forgiveness and reconciliation Why forgiveness is an internal process, not restored access How faith can be used to heal rather than control Why Jesus forgave freely and still set boundaries How honoring what’s still healing can be an act of wisdom, not failure This episode is for anyone navigating:spiritual abuse, emotional manipulation, family systems, boundaries, faith and healing, or the pressure to “forgive and move on” before it’s safe. Forgiveness can free you.Boundaries can protect you.You don’t have to choose one or the other. Note: If this episode resonates with you, we would love for you to follow our podcast, give us a rating, or follow us on social media so we can keep the dialogue going. Regardless of whether you do those things or not... know that we are grateful you are here with us. Hope you will join us again soon.

    4 min

  8. FEB 3

    Here's the Lesson: How Resentment is Born in Good Intentions

    What happens when kindness comes with expectations? In this mini episode of Here’s the Lesson, we explore how giving—especially in families—can quietly turn into obligation, control, or resentment when it’s tied to unspoken expectations. This conversation isn’t about blame. It’s about honesty, boundaries, and learning the difference between love that’s freely given and love that’s conditional. If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠Click here⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

    4 min
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About

🌿 Cleave: The Podcast Hi! We’re Jon and Ashley Lefrandt. In Cleave, we explore what it means to hold fast—to God, to truth, and to each other. As devoted Latter-day Saints, we talk honestly about faith, family, healing, and the work of becoming one—in marriage, in discipleship, and in Christ. Here, we blend doctrine with real life: the messy, the redemptive, the beautiful. Whether you’re a believer, a seeker, or someone rebuilding faith from the ground up, this is a space for honest conversation and spiritual courage. Join us as we learn to cleave to truth, to love, and to what still matt

Information

  • Creator
    Jon and Ashley Lefrandt
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    29
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Jon and Ashley Lefrandt
  • Show Website
    Cleave: The Podcast