Adventures of Des and Cort

adventuresofdesandcort
  • 5.0 (16)
  • Comedy

Welcome to the Adventures of Des & Cort podcast, where lifelong friendship meets unfiltered conversation. Join Des and Cort, two best friends, as they invite you into their world filled with laughter, tears, and everything in between. In each episode, Des and Cort delve deep into the intricacies of their bond, sharing stories of their adventures, triumphs, and challenges. From navigating the complexities of relationships to tackling career aspirations and personal growth, nothing is off-limits. But this podcast isn't just about Des and Cort—it's a celebration of the sisterhood and camaraderie that binds women together. Through their candid discussions and relatable anecdotes, they aim to create a safe and welcoming space where listeners can see themselves reflected, find solidarity, and perhaps glean a nugget of wisdom or two. So whether you're in need of a good laugh, a shoulder to lean on, or simply seeking connection with kindred spirits, tune in to the Adventures of Des & Cort podcast. Because life's greatest journey is best traveled with a friend by your side

  1. 6d ago

    Des and Cort Party of Two

    Send us Fan Mail We took Chicago by storm... or at least we walked A LOT, ate some good food, laughed until our stomachs hurt, and learned that apparently two grown women can almost miss a flight while standing approximately 30 feet from their actual gate. 😂 We're recapping our Chicago adventure, and let us tell you... we had THE BEST time. Des's Hot Flash starts at the airport with a man who apparently felt the need to rush in and claim the overhead bin space from Desiree because, according to him, “I never get to put my bag up there.” Sir. It's an overhead bin. Not a winning lottery ticket. It wasn't that serious, but Des has thoughts. And honestly, the men in our lives would have never acted that way. 😂 Then there was our 4:30 AM airport experience, complete with what sounded like a rooster alarm clock going off at the boarding gate. Nothing says “good morning” quite like being half asleep at the airport and hearing a rooster announce the beginning of your day. We also almost missed our connection, but not because we were completely oblivious. Our gate was a tiny gate that was already packed, so we were hanging out right next to it at another gate, fully aware that our flight was boarding. We were boarding Group 7. What we failed to realize was that this was a much smaller plane, which meant they were going to board that thing at approximately the speed of light. Suddenly we're like... WAIT. WHY IS EVERYONE GONE?! We made it. Obviously. But perhaps a little more awareness of airplane size would have been helpful. 😂 And then there is Cortnie's favorite part of flying: the safety briefing, which apparently functions as a very effective lullaby. Once we got to Chicago, we were ready to explore. We did the architecture boat tour, saw the city from the river, walked our asses all over Chicago, ate, drank, laughed and had the absolute BEST time. And then we discovered something neither of us expected... LAND SICKNESS. Not from the boat. From staying on the 31st floor of our hotel. Apparently after a few days of being way up there, Cortnie's body decided that solid ground was merely a suggestion. 😂 We also got a taste of bougie travel, and let's just say... once you experience certain things, you start wondering why you ever traveled any other way. Then there was the woman who absolutely would NOT let go of the fact that there are microplastics in bottled water and that you can refill your water bottle at the refill stations. We hear you, ma'am. We understand the concern. But at some point, you have to let it go. 😂 We talk about the trip, the laughs, the little moments, the things that went sideways, and why getting away together was exactly what we needed. And, as usual, we talked about approximately 47 other things because apparently, we cannot simply have one conversation. We have to have ALL the conversations. 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  2. Sep 17

    Slippin’ In Shit

    Send us Fan Mail This episode went places. We’re talking AI-generated photos, questionable nap routines, fantasy football, car wash disasters, Microsoft Teams, and... literal shit. So basically, another completely normal conversation between Des and Cort. 😂 Des’s Hot Flash this week is for the people who are accepting compliments on their AI-generated photos like they actually look like that. Listen. We love an AI glow-up. Make yourself a princess. Put yourself on a yacht. Give yourself hair that would require an entire team of professionals to maintain. Have fun with it! But when someone says, “You look gorgeous!” and you respond like, “Thank you!” when the AI version of you has a completely different face... GIRL. You can enjoy the picture. You can think it's fun. But please stop accepting compliments on a face that isn't even yours. 😂 Then Cort has an important question: How the hell do you nap? Because apparently there are two types of people. People who take a quick little nap... and Des. Des will put on her pajamas in the middle of the damn day, get fully under the covers, and take a legitimate nap like it's nighttime. Then, if she has somewhere to go later, she'll get dressed again. Cort has questions. We also need to talk about the woman who competed in a Hydrox competition, shit herself... and kept going. There is so much to unpack here. Is it impressive? Absolutely. Is it determination? Sure. Is it sanitary? Absolutely the hell not. Would either of us ever do it? We would simply like to say... NO. Then Des went to the car wash and, after previously making fun of Cort for being nervous about the whole process, managed to prove that Cort's concern may not have been completely irrational. Des put the car in reverse. The attendant was not impressed. 😂 We also get into fantasy football, Microsoft Teams, and approximately 87 side conversations that had absolutely nothing to do with anything we started talking about. You know the drill. Come hang out with us for another episode of Adventures of Des and Cort, where the conversations are unpredictable, the opinions are strong, and apparently sometimes people are just... slippin' in shit. 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  3. Sep 10

    We Were Supposed To Talk About...

    Send us Fan Mail Honestly, we're not even sure what we were supposed to talk about anymore. 😂 This episode is a whole lotta jibber jabber, side conversations, opinions nobody asked for, and somehow... a LOT to unpack. Des kicks things off with a hot flash for people who absolutely cannot function under pressure. A short timeline? Pressure? Something due in two hours? WE'RE ON IT. What do you mean you need more time?! Give us a looming deadline, a time crunch, and absolutely no room for error and WATCH US WORK. If there isn't pressure, we're probably not doing it. Give us three weeks with no deadline and suddenly we're confused about who we are and what we're doing with our lives. Cort's hot flash is for the people who meet you for approximately 10 minutes and then decide they have you completely figured out. Ummm... hello? You have known me for ten minutes. 😂 Go ahead and tell me who you think I am, but unless you've actually known me for years, your opinion of me is probably not going to keep me up at night. We talk about our camping weekend. Laidback, family, good friends, campfires, and cool weather. It was so nice to get away. We are pist with our last-minute packing this week for a business event, and the fact that apparently “I'll pack later” is a completely reasonable strategy until you're standing in front of your suitcase wondering what you’re going to wear.  We're also fully invested in football this year, which means fantasy football has officially taken over more of our brain space than is probably healthy. But we're having fun, so that's what matters. 🏈 We also have a little book trauma to discuss after finishing The Last Letter. WHO WRITES BOOKS LIKE THIS?! We're still processing. Our emotional stability would like a word with the author. Des also tells us about feeding the stray kitty, because apparently her tiny feline friend has figured out exactly which humans are suckers for a hungry face. 🐈 And somewhere in between all of that, we manage to discuss approximately 37 other things that were absolutely not on the agenda. Basically, we were supposed to talk about something. Instead, we jibber jabbered. As usual. 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!   We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  4. Sep 3

    Who TF Has Been Pooping in Our Podcast Room?

    Send us Fan Mail This episode takes us everywhere. Literally everywhere. There is wine, road rage, screen-time shame, Chicago planning, elder abuse, camping excitement, shopping priorities... and eventually, a horrifying discovery that makes us question everything. Des starts with a hot flash for the people who move painfully slow in the fast lane...on the interstate. You know the ones. They are taking their sweet damn time while everyone behind them is ready to pass them emotionally, spiritually, and possibly physically. Des maintains that these people are more dangerous than the ones going way too fast. 😂 Cort has a little financial trauma to unpack after she and Des somehow managed to spend $70 on four glasses of wine. FOUR. With tip. At this point, Cort would like everyone to know that she should have just bought the damn bottle. 🍷 We're also calling ourselves out for our recent phone addiction. We keep picking up our phones when we should be doing literally anything else. Especially working out. GIRLLLL. PUT THE PHONE DOWN. GO DO YOUR DAMN WORKOUT. We're getting excited for our upcoming Chicago trip and need the Chicago experts to help us out. Give us your must-go restaurants, places, shops, experiences, hidden gems and anything else we absolutely cannot miss. Because obviously we also need to go shopping ASAP. New event? New outfits. This is non-negotiable. 👗 Des brings up a heartbreaking story about a woman who lost her father and his home after discovering that the person she trusted to care for him had taken advantage of the situation. We talk about elder abuse, how devastating it is, and how anyone who exploits an elderly or vulnerable person deserves a very special place in the afterlife. Then we shift gears completely because we're heading CAMPING! 🏕️ Fall weather. Campfires. Football. Adults only. Limited service. Honestly, the limited service might be our favorite part. 😂 And just when you think we've covered enough random topics for one episode, we make a discovery at the very END of recording. There is mouse poop. ALL. OVER. THE PODCAST ROOM. We had apparently been sitting, talking, laughing and recording in a room that some tiny little assholes had decided to make their personal bathroom. Were we disgusted? Yes. Were we mortified? Absolutely. Did we immediately start wondering how long the mice had been listening to us? Also yes. So now we have questions. WHO TF HAS BEEN POOPING IN OUR PODCAST ROOM? 🐭💩 And, as always, we took several scenic detours along the way because apparently neither of us knows how to have just ONE conversation. 😂 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! #adventuresofdesandcort #womenintheir40s #podcastforwomen #midlife #girltalk We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  5. Aug 27

    The People's Elbow

    Send us Fan Mail This week on Adventures of Des and Cort, we're learning that even reaching for a swimsuit cover-up can apparently become a contact sport. 😂 Des's Hot Flash this week starts innocently enough. She reached into a tote for a swimsuit cover-up and somehow managed to grab the iron cord instead. The iron came flying directly off the shelf and straight onto her head. Immediate rage. Seeing stars. A brief moment of questioning every life choice that led her to this moment. Then, naturally, Google searches. Because apparently the first thing you do after getting assaulted by your own household appliance is ask the internet if you're dying. 🔥👊 Cort didn't have a Hot Flash this week. Instead, she wanted to give her husband some well-deserved praise. Josh is the ultimate hype man and apparently has an unlimited supply of compliments, encouragement and affection. We love a man who knows his assignment. ❤️ We also check in on our brand-new Hot Flashers Fantasy Football League. It's all women, there are LOTS of questions, some confusion, and absolutely no shortage of confidence. Do we know exactly what we're doing? Not yet. Are we going to have fun? 100%. 🏈🔥 Then we had our final water aerobics class of the season and we are genuinely bummed about it. Warm water, sunshine, movement, and a bunch of ladies laughing together? Sign us up. We're already looking forward to next year. 🏊‍♀️☀️ And of course, we have our usual side conversations that somehow take us in twelve completely different directions. An iron attack. A husband appreciation moment. Fantasy football confusion. The end of our water aerobics era. Just another completely normal day with Des & Cort. 😂 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  6. Aug 20

    Why are you touching me?

    Send us Fan Mail This week on Adventures of Des and Cort, we have questions. Important questions. Questions humanity has apparently been avoiding. Like... how the hell do you face in the shower? 🚿 Front? Back? Sideways? Are you a flipper who rotates with the water like a rotisserie chicken? Cort has discovered she may be the odd woman out because she showers sideways or backward, while Des and apparently everyone else she questioned are full-on flippers. We need answers. This may be the most important poll we've ever conducted. But first, our Hot Flashes are HOT 🔥 Des is irritated because her brother, with the best intentions, changed her parents' phone plan. Sounds helpful... until you realize Des will inevitably be the one answering all the questions when something stops working. Sometimes you just have to leave well enough alone, people. 😂 Cort's Hot Flash is a little more personal. Handsy husbands. Specifically, husbands who decide NOW is the perfect time for physical affection when you absolutely do not want to be touched. Apparently, there is no safe position. Can't bend over. Can't walk by. Can't exist peacefully. Ladies, you understand. We also escaped our normal routines and tried water aerobics, and honestly... we're obsessed. Warm weather, perfect water temperature, beautiful pool, and the nicest group of ladies. It was exactly the kind of grandma activity we didn't know we needed. There are only three sessions left next Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, so if you've been thinking about going, GO! 🏊‍♀️😂 Then Des tells us a story that will make you sleep differently forever. A cockroach got into a woman's ear... and Des actually SAW THEM REMOVE IT. We repeat: SHE SAW IT. There will now be cotton in ears, excessive pillow checking, and absolutely no sleeping peacefully. 🪳👂😳 We also talk about the Lindsey Clancy trial and the questions we're having about the timeline and what we've heard so far. We're talking through our reactions and why reasonable doubt is weighing heavily on our minds. And, naturally, there are approximately 900 side conversations because staying on topic is simply not our ministry. 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! #adventuresofdesandcort #howdoyoushower #podcastlife #womeninour40s #hotflashes #wateraerobics #midlifechaos #friendship #yapsesh #grandmaera   We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  7. Aug 13

    Current Wife

    Send us Fan Mail This week on Adventures of Des and Cort, we're confronting the things that make us cringe, question our marriages, and wonder why we can't just act normal on the internet. 😂 Des's Hot Flash this week is... our old social media posts. The dancing. The singing. The wigs. The mortgage page content that seemed like a great idea at the time. Now? Absolutely horrifying. Nothing will humble you faster than watching yourself from five years ago with a little more wisdom and a LOT more secondhand embarrassment. 😳 Cort's Hot Flash is overthinking. Why do we spend so much time worrying, analyzing, imagining every possible outcome... and then eventually do the thing anyway? Why can't we just GO FOR IT? Apparently our brains need to hold a full committee meeting before making a decision. Then we discover the singing car salesman on Instagram who blesses your new car with a full-on song when you purchase it. We have one thing to say... Please don't. 😂 We would like our vehicle, our keys, and our dignity. No personalized performance necessary. Then Cort drops the bomb that Josh casually referred to her as his "current wife." Just slipped it into conversation like that was a completely normal thing to say. His reaction? Hilarious. Cort's initial reaction? Less hilarious. 😂 We also get into the Brooks Nader conversation and the question nobody can stop thinking about... how comfortable are you being topless around your family? Girlfriends? Fine. Mom? Okay, maybe. But Dad walks in and suddenly we're reaching for a robe, a blanket, a tablecloth... literally anything. 😂 Then we introduce our newest word: Snerdle. Do you know what it means? Probably not. Do we snerdle every night? Absolutely. Is it now officially part of our vocabulary? Unfortunately, yes. Add in our usual side conversations, random opinions, marriage commentary, and enough yapping to make you wonder how we ever get anything done. 🎧 Listen now to Adventures of Des and Cort on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

  8. Aug 5

    F*ckalanche

    Send us Fan Mail This week on Adventures of Des and Cort, we're introducing a brand new word to the English language... and if you've lived long enough, you've probably experienced one. F*ckalanche. You'll know it when you hear it. 😂 Our Hot Flashes kick things off with neighborhood nuisances. Des is officially over the dogs that bark at absolutely everything. You know the ones. You're just trying to sit outside, embrace your grandma era, water your flowers, work on your latest hobby, and suddenly you're starring in a nonstop canine concert. If your dog is announcing every leaf that blows by, respectfully... we'd like to file a complaint. 🐶 Meanwhile, Cort is battling a far more modern crisis. There is ONE notification on her Facebook Messenger that refuses to disappear. She's clicked everything. She's searched everywhere. She's accepted defeat. Is this just elder millennial life now? Because if one little red notification is staring at us all day, our nervous systems cannot relax. Des also recaps an outdoor concert in 105-degree heat where everyone was packed together so tightly it felt approximately 147 degrees. Then, just when she thought it couldn't get worse, a teenage girl casually spitting into the packed lawn seating area... dangerously close to her husbands hand. Between the heat, the crowds, and the complete lack of spatial awareness, she was one body temperature away from becoming the headline. Then Cort asks an important driving question... If you're in the fast lane on the interstate, surrounded by traffic, are you controlling your speed with the gas pedal... or are you repeatedly setting and resetting your cruise control? Because whoever keeps using cruise control in heavy traffic has unknowingly been testing her emotional stability for years. She stayed quiet... but internally? There was a full-blown F*ckalanche. As always, we wander into random side quests, overshare a little too much, laugh at ourselves, and somehow invent vocabulary along the way. 🎧 Listen now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts! #adventuresofdesandcort #fuckalanche #podcastlife #womeninour40s #hotflashes #midlifehumor #friendship #eldermillennial #concertchaos #yapsesh   We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review! Don't forget to follow and share!  Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort

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5
out of 5
16 Ratings

About

Welcome to the Adventures of Des & Cort podcast, where lifelong friendship meets unfiltered conversation. Join Des and Cort, two best friends, as they invite you into their world filled with laughter, tears, and everything in between. In each episode, Des and Cort delve deep into the intricacies of their bond, sharing stories of their adventures, triumphs, and challenges. From navigating the complexities of relationships to tackling career aspirations and personal growth, nothing is off-limits. But this podcast isn't just about Des and Cort—it's a celebration of the sisterhood and camaraderie that binds women together. Through their candid discussions and relatable anecdotes, they aim to create a safe and welcoming space where listeners can see themselves reflected, find solidarity, and perhaps glean a nugget of wisdom or two. So whether you're in need of a good laugh, a shoulder to lean on, or simply seeking connection with kindred spirits, tune in to the Adventures of Des & Cort podcast. Because life's greatest journey is best traveled with a friend by your side

Information

  • Creator
    adventuresofdesandcort
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    121
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Adventures of Des and Cort
  • Show Website
    Adventures of Des and Cort

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