Softly Unfiltered

Ashlyn & Blake
  • 4.8 (34)
  • Society & Culture
  • Weekly

Hosted by Ashlyn and Blake, two multifaceted Black women based in Houston, Softly Unfiltered is where soft meets honest. Each week, we get real about personal growth, healing, navigating corporate America, and the messy, funny, and complex realities of modern dating. From breaking generational cycles to finding our voice in spaces that weren't built for us, our conversations blend honesty, humor, and hard truths—all rooted in our lived experiences. Whether we're swapping stories, tackling trending topics, or unpacking the unspoken rules of friendship, relationships, beauty, ambition, and womanhood, we're here to remind you that you can be soft and strong, ambitious and at peace, healed and still healing. If you've ever felt like you're balancing a hundred different versions of yourself, welcome. This is a space for the multifaceted girlies. Pull up a seat. The group chat is live. 💕 New episodes every Wednesday.

  1. 15h ago ·  Video

    No Is a Full Sentence | Boundaries, Guilt & People-Pleasing

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. Why does saying no feel so uncomfortable, even when you already know you do not want to do something? In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn unpack why women are so often taught to soften, justify, apologize for, and over-explain their boundaries. From the pressure to stay likable and agreeable to the guilt that comes with disappointing people, we get into what it actually looks like to let your no stand on its own. We talk about why assertive men are often seen as confident while assertive women get labeled difficult, why over-explaining gives people room to negotiate your boundaries, how to let an uncomfortable moment stay uncomfortable, and why some relationships normalize self-sacrifice as proof of love. We also get into: • Why over-explaining can really mean "please don't be mad at me" • Why your yes can become a no • Letting grown adults manage their own feelings • Why you may regret your yeses more than your nos • What it looks like when people feel entitled to your reasoning • Why saying no more can create more peace, time, and space for yourself • The question to ask before saying yes: do I actually have room for this? Today's Soft Landing: Your no does not need to be defended to be valid. You can be kind without being available, loving without being accessible, and considerate without abandoning yourself. Sometimes the most peaceful thing you can say is simply no. No is not rude. It is clarity. 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! Visit Softlyunfiltered.com

    No Is a Full Sentence | Boundaries, Guilt & People-Pleasing

  2. Oct 28 ·  Video

    Things We're Too Grown To Still Be Doing | Dating, Friendship & Boundaries

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. At some point, certain things stop feeling fun, dramatic, or worth entertaining and start feeling exhausting. In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn talk about the things they're officially too grown to still be doing: passive-aggressive friendships, situationships, emotional chaos, repeating boundaries, male-centered friendships, people who want you dysregulated, and relationships that cost too much peace. This one is lighter, a little shady, and very honest about the habits and dynamics that used to feel normal but no longer match the women we're becoming. We get into: • Why jabs disguised as jokes can reveal something deeper • Why some people get irritated when you stay calm during conflict • The difference between caring and becoming emotionally reactive • Breaking generational patterns of chaos • Why fighting is not proof that someone loves you • Why we're too grown for situationships and wasted time • The problem with passive aggression in adult friendships • Why boundaries should not need endless explanations • Being too grown for male-centered friendships • Why protecting your peace may cost you relationships Today's Soft Landing: Being grown is not about having everything figured out, it is about recognizing what costs too much and choosing not to keep paying for it with your peace. At some point, being too grown is discernment. It is knowing what no longer matches the woman you are becoming. What is one thing you are officially too grown to still be doing? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! Visit softlyunfiltered.com

    Things We're Too Grown To Still Be Doing | Dating, Friendship & Boundaries

  3. Oct 21

    The Glow Up After the Hard Season | Why Women Come Back Differently

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. The glow up after a hard season is rarely just about how you look. It is about the boundaries you finally set, the patterns you stop repeating, the peace you protect, and the version of yourself you become after life forces you to tell yourself the truth. In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn talk about what really changes after heartbreak, betrayal, burnout, disappointment, or any season that forces you to rebuild. We get into why women are praised for surviving but rarely supported while they heal, what it means to stop healing for other people, and why accountability is one of the biggest parts of a real comeback. We also get into: • Why the real glow up starts internally • The same man, different font dating pattern • Why women are praised for surviving in silence • Healing for yourself instead of healing for a man • The therapy session that changed a relationship • How accountability and stronger boundaries change your life • Why staying too long is something you may have to own • Why a 10-step glow-up routine cannot replace inner work • Nervous-system regulation, trauma, stress, and the physical glow • Why your vision board matters less than who you need to become • How showing up for yourself consistently creates the real comeback Today's Soft Landing: The real glow up is not always what people can see. Sometimes it is quieter than that. It is stronger boundaries, deeper peace, clearer standards, and finally becoming someone you can trust. Pain may have changed you, but that does not mean it wasted you. What hard season changed you for the better, even if you didn't understand it at the time? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!

    The Glow Up After the Hard Season | Why Women Come Back Differently

  4. Oct 14 ·  Video

    Stop Caring What People Think They Don't Live in Your Shoes

    Everybody has an opinion about your life, but they are not the ones who have to live with the consequences of your choices. In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn talk about self-trust, discernment, projection, people-pleasing, intuition, and what it actually looks like to stop asking other people to approve a life they will never have to live. We get into the subtle ways people sow doubt, why success can change relationships, protecting big dreams before they are ready to be shared, and learning to be okay with being misunderstood. We also get into: • How to tell the difference between wise counsel and projection • Why some people cheer for you until you start to pass them • Being willing to be misunderstood as you grow • The line between protecting your plans and shrinking yourself • Why big dreams can scare the people you tell • Trusting your intuition and listening to your body • A relationship dream that kept sending the same warning • Why the highest form of peace may be letting go of the need to be understood • Being unapologetic about your standards • Why not every opinion deserves weight Today's Soft Landing: You do not need everyone to understand the life you are building. Some people will doubt you because they cannot see it yet. Some will project because they never tried. Their fear does not have to become your ceiling. Everybody with an opinion does not have wisdom. Whose opinion have you been giving too much power over your life? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! Vist softlyunfiltered.com

    Stop Caring What People Think They Don't Live in Your Shoes

  5. Oct 7 ·  Video

    I'm Not Who I Was, And That's the Point | Celebrating Growth, Change & Becoming

    Episode 100. Almost two years of showing up, evolving, changing our minds, changing our standards, and becoming women our episode-one selves might not fully recognize. In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn reflect on what has changed since the beginning of the podcast — from relationships and friendships to career, confidence, generosity, dating standards, and the way they see themselves. We talk about why growth is supposed to change you, why endings are not always bad, what we no longer believe about the ‘dream job,’ and why doing the work on yourself creates a kind of confidence that nobody else can give you. We also get into: • Why people sometimes call you fake when you evolve • Learning to embrace endings and changing seasons • Why dream jobs in corporate America no longer feel real to us • The 50/50 conversation and why splitting bills does not automatically make life equal • Grieving the version of yourself that gave too much • How self-work changes your confidence • What we hope the next version of ourselves looks like by Episode 200 • Purposeful, peaceful, pretty, and paid Today’s Soft Landing: You are allowed to become someone your old self would not fully recognize. Change does not make you fake. Growth does not make you disloyal. Sometimes the point is to outgrow the version of you that only knew how to survive. What is one way that you have changed that you are finally proud of? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! Visit softlyunfiltered.com

    I'm Not Who I Was, And That's the Point | Celebrating Growth, Change & Becoming

  6. Sep 30 ·  Video

    Feel It, Don’t Become It | How to Manage Your Emotions Without Letting Them Control You

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. Your feelings are valid, but that does not mean every emotion needs to become an immediate reaction. This week Blake and Ashlyn are talking about emotional maturity, anger, hurt, boundaries, self-awareness, and what it actually looks like to process your feelings before they control how you move. From needing time before a difficult conversation to deciding what does and does not need to be addressed, this episode is about learning how to feel deeply without handing your emotions the steering wheel. In this episode: · Why adults struggle to name what they are actually feeling · When anger is covering hurt, embarrassment, rejection, or fear · Why taking time to process can be healthier than reacting immediately · Why nobody owes you anything and how that can change your expectations · How emotional reactivity shows up in relationships, friendships, and work · Why Black women often have to regulate differently in corporate spaces · What lashing out can permanently change in a relationship · Why not everything that bothers you needs to be addressed · How being constantly outside or in relationships can become a way to avoid yourself Today’s Soft Landing: You do not have to suppress your emotions to be mature. You just have to stop handing them the steering wheel. Feel it, name it, sit with it, and then choose a response your future self can live with. What emotion do you usually react from before you understand what is underneath it? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! Visit softlyunfiltered.com

    Feel It, Don’t Become It | How to Manage Your Emotions Without Letting Them Control You

  7. Sep 23 ·  Video

    Who The Hell Was That? Outgrowing Old Versions of Yourself, Red Flags & Self Trust

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. Have you ever looked back at an old version of yourself and thought, who the hell was that? This week Blake and Ashlyn are laughing lovingly at the things they used to tolerate, believe, excuse, and over explain while unpacking what changed along the way. From trusting your intuition to forgiving yourself for accepting less, this conversation is about the standards, boundaries, and self trust that come with finally knowing better. In this episode: · Why your body can recognize a red flag before your mind catches up · Why women are often taught to second guess their intuition · The role luck, access, and connections can play in success · How to forgive yourself for accepting less than you deserved · Why relationships can start to feel like performance · How dating changes when you stop romanticizing potential ✨Today’s Soft Landing: You are allowed to laugh at who you used to be without hating her. She may have accepted less than she deserved, but she was also learning, surviving, and gathering the wisdom you get to live out today. What is something you used to tolerate that your current self would never accept? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify! softlyunfiltered.com

    Who The Hell Was That? Outgrowing Old Versions of Yourself, Red Flags & Self Trust

  8. Sep 16 ·  Video

    Who Really Leads? | Unlearning Patriarchy, Submission & What Leadership Actually Means

    Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women. Who gets called a leader, who is actually doing the leading, and how many of our beliefs about men, women, submission, and power did we inherit without ever questioning them? This week Blake and Ashlyn use the dynamics of the lion and lioness as a jumping off point to unpack the narratives we are taught about leadership. They get into why providing alone does not make someone a leader, how women can be taught to shrink themselves in the name of submission, why titles and appearances can be mistaken for competence, and what healthy leadership actually looks like. We got into: • Why men being natural leaders is a social agreement, not an unquestionable fact • The male loneliness conversation and why women are increasingly dating for character • Why a title, money, or status does not automatically make someone a good leader • The difference between leadership, dominance, respect, and control • Why some women protect a man’s image by biting their tongue and making themselves smaller • Today’s Unfiltered Moment featuring testimonies from men who admitted marrying women they were not in love with • How beauty, submission, convenience, and ego can become part of the decision to marry Today’s Soft Landing: Leadership is not a title you inherit. It is a responsibility you earn. The people worth following do not need to make you feel smaller to prove that they are powerful. Real leadership feels like wisdom, care, consistency, and safety. What is one belief about leadership, love, or womanhood that you have had to unlearn? 📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!

    Who Really Leads? | Unlearning Patriarchy, Submission & What Leadership Actually Means
See All (104)

4.8
out of 5
34 Ratings

About

Hosted by Ashlyn and Blake, two multifaceted Black women based in Houston, Softly Unfiltered is where soft meets honest. Each week, we get real about personal growth, healing, navigating corporate America, and the messy, funny, and complex realities of modern dating. From breaking generational cycles to finding our voice in spaces that weren't built for us, our conversations blend honesty, humor, and hard truths—all rooted in our lived experiences. Whether we're swapping stories, tackling trending topics, or unpacking the unspoken rules of friendship, relationships, beauty, ambition, and womanhood, we're here to remind you that you can be soft and strong, ambitious and at peace, healed and still healing. If you've ever felt like you're balancing a hundred different versions of yourself, welcome. This is a space for the multifaceted girlies. Pull up a seat. The group chat is live. 💕 New episodes every Wednesday.

Information

  • Creator
    Ashlyn & Blake
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    104
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 Ashlyn & Blake
  • Show Website
    Softly Unfiltered

You Might Also Like