What if some of the ways spirituality is practiced today are actually reinforcing the very suffering they claim to heal? In this powerful and confronting conversation, Xavier Dagba sits down with Scott Kiloby, founder of the Kiloby Inquiry and a pioneer in trauma-informed nondual work, to explore a hidden pattern affecting countless seekers, teachers, and healers: Spirituality used as a way to avoid feeling. Together, they unpack what happens when spiritual concepts are used to bypass pain, suppress emotions, or dissociate from the body, and how this “spiritual illness” quietly keeps people stuck, fragmented, and disconnected from real integration. This episode is for you if: You’ve done years of inner work but still feel blocked, numb, or disconnected You sense that “letting go,” “transcending the ego,” or “staying high-vibe” has cost you access to your humanity You’re ready for a grounded, embodied, trauma-aware approach to awakening You want spirituality that includes the nervous system, the body, and emotional truth This is not a rejection of spirituality. It’s an invitation to make it honest, embodied, and liberating. ABOUT SCOTT KILOBY Scott Kiloby is the founder of Kiloby Inquiry, a trauma-informed approach to nonduality that directly addresses emotional repression, compulsions, and nervous system dysregulation. Website: https://kiloby.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/scottkiloby EXPLORE XAVIER’S WORK Book — Scars of Gold A framework for shadow integration, self-liberation, and embodied truth https://www.scarsofgold.com Newsletter — Embodied Light Weekly reflections, teachings, and invitations https://newsletter.xavierdagba.com 🎧 Listen to the Enheartened Podcast Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 ⏱️ CHAPTERS 00:00 — Introduction: the hidden cost of spiritual avoidance 02:30 — Scott Kiloby’s background and path into inquiry 06:10 — When spirituality becomes another addiction 10:45 — Spiritual bypassing vs. true liberation 15:05 — Trauma, dissociation, and the nervous system 20:20 — Why “letting go” often doesn’t work 26:30 — Avoiding feelings in the name of awakening 32:10 — The problem with transcendence without embodiment 38:25 — How suppression masquerades as peace 45:40 — Spiritual suppression and emotional numbness 52:15 — Nonduality, inquiry, and meeting what’s here 58:00 — What real integration actually requires 1:05:10 — Bringing awareness into the body 1:12:40 — A more honest path to freedom 1:21:00 — Closing reflections and invitations #SpiritualBypassing #EmbodiedSpirituality #ShadowIntegration #TraumaInformed #SomaticHealing #NonDuality #EmotionalHealing #SpiritualAwakening #InnerWork #EnheartenedPodcast
