Distorted View Daily: NSFW Comedy, Weird News & Internet Oddities

Distorted View
Distorted View
  • 4.7 (914)
  • Stand-Up
  • Updated Daily

Distorted View Daily is a dark-comedy podcast covering weird news, strange internet culture, disturbing viral clips, cringe videos, and NSFW stories — A perfect show for fans of adult comedy, bizarre true stories, and the stranger side of online culture. New episodes every weekday.

DISTORTED VIEW SIDESHOW

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  1. 1d ago • Subscribers Only

    Graveyard Erotica Featuring A Special Ed Teacher - SIDESHOW

    Episode Summary Amy Slaton launches an AI-assisted music career that leaves her family wheezing, Sextastic Tuesday visits a deeply unhygienic graveyard, a computer teacher lands in an alleged Apple Pay prostitution robbery, and the internet adopts a suspiciously well-groomed mustache baby. Thousand Pound Sisters: No-Hit Wonder Edition Amy and Tammy Slaton have lost enough weight that 1000-Lb. Sisters may need a new title, but TLC still has eight seasons of highly rated family turmoil to keep alive. With the original weight-loss mission largely accomplished, Tammy explores her sexuality while Amy explores a creative outlet with fewer calories and considerably more artificial intelligence. Amy releases “Pounds Hollow,” an AI-generated song inspired by a national forest. She neither sings the original recording nor writes its lyrics, but proudly presents it as a heartfelt family anthem. The Slaton siblings arrive at the listening party already asking how much work will be required and whether any of it must happen outside in the cold.g. Sextastic Tuesday Goes Grave Robbing Halloween week brings a spooky edition of Sextastic Tuesday, the recurring search for erotica capable of arousing the depraved and emotionally injuring everybody else. The featured story follows Miri, a tiny goth girl marking her birthday and the anniversary of her parents’ deaths with a midnight trip to their cemetery. Her peaceful graveyard ritual becomes a violent sexual fantasy involving a mysterious attacker, repeated assaults and a gravestone used in several ways its manufacturer never intended. As always in catastrophically written erotica, severe pain and obvious bodily trauma somehow produce endless orgasms because anatomy has formally withdrawn from the story. ️ Distorted News Computer Teacher Accused in Apple Pay Prostitution Robbery New Jersey computer teacher Amanda Krafts loses her job after being arrested in connection with an alleged hotel-room robbery involving prostitution, facial recognition and a naked man pinned to a bed. The unidentified victim reportedly met Krafts and Veda Engel at a casino bar before Engel invited him to a room at Harrah’s Resort in Atlantic City. Once inside, the man claims the women stripped and restrained him while Engel performed a sex act that abruptly ended with a mandatory ＄1,250 price tag. Krafts allegedly held the man down while Engel positioned his iPhone in front of his face, unlocked it through facial recognition and completed four Apple Pay transactions. The alleged maneuver transforms a familiar fake Apple Pay prank into armed robbery’s sleazier biometric cousin. ✈️ Drunken Delta Passenger Performs Finger-Gun Terrorism A 60-year-old Brooklyn man named Jerome Annixter is arrested after an alleged drunken meltdown aboard a Delta flight from New York to Atlanta. Witnesses say Annixter shouted “Death to America,” aimed an imaginary gun at fellow passengers and supplied his own enthusiastic “pow, pow, pow” sound effects. Port Authority police board the aircraft and escort him away while he smiles, demands that passengers post the spectacle on Instagram and repeatedly uses a racial slur. Ecuador’s Viral Mustache Baby May Be Too Perfect A newborn reportedly born in Ecuador becomes an international sensation after appearing in a five-second video with a thick mustache and tiny goatee. The infant looks less like a newborn and more like a middle-aged hardware-store employee carrying two mortgages and disappointing pension news. Internet users quickly transform the baby into a military dictator, cigar-smoking businessman, Nintendo character and supreme leader through Photoshop and AI. No hospital, parent or doctor has publicly confirmed the baby’s identity, leaving the viral origin story suspiciously hairless on details.

  2. 1d ago

    Dream Home Comes With a Decomposing Cottage Corpse

    Prefer to listen? Play the latest episode below. Episode Summary Ohio politics crawls beneath the sewer line, a subway racist battles the Black Boogeyman, Ric Flair drunkenly torpedoes a wedding, and a football fan allegedly tapes his wife to a basement chair so nobody interrupts the game. Halloween Is Satan’s Candy Giveaway A former practicing […] The post Dream Home Comes With a Decomposing Cottage Corpse first appeared on Distorted View Daily.

  3. 4d ago

    Forced Diapering, Fishy C**t Fumes and a Missing Dildo

    Prefer to listen? Play the latest episode below. Episode Summary Sagittarius Shouty discovers that dating another prostitute brings double the raw sex and triple the drama, Mead explains why umbrellas and iced coffee are not gay, Tan Mom nearly gets deported for excessive bronzing, and an adult baby allegedly strangles his girlfriend during a forced […] The post Forced Diapering, Fishy C**t Fumes and a Missing Dildo first appeared on Distorted View Daily.

  4. 6d ago • Subscribers Only

    Socktober Freak Eats Tangy Toe Jam Before His Togasm - SIDESHOW

    Episode Summary A foot freak celebrates Soctober by eating his own toe jam, a public pisser produces butt jelly in a pickup truck, TikTok turns a fake child death into a sales pitch, and one filthy nail salon may be painting Portland’s fingers with genital herpes. Happy Soctober, Foot Freaks Soctober is apparently a sacred month for the stinky-sock and foot-fetish community, because every interest deserves a holiday until somebody opens the sock box. A familiar foot enthusiast returns with swollen balls, a rock-hard penis and an entire container of damp socks left to ferment in darkness. His shoes contain socks so wet, slimy and discolored that their odor has allegedly colonized the entire bedroom.Public Urination and Ford F-150 Butt Jelly A fearless content creator builds her online identity around urinating in public with all the discretion of a broken fire hydrant. She climbs onto a stranger’s parked car in broad daylight and releases a powerful stream while pedestrians watch from across the street. A second performance targets the face of a public statue, possibly Benjamin Franklin, who has already endured enough since the invention of electricity. She later fills a homeless man’s red cup with urine, flashes him and drops a few coins as compensation. Tim gives the encounter a five-percent chance of being spontaneous. The production finally moves into the bed of a pickup truck, where anal play leaves a dildo coated in what the performer calls butt jelly. The substance looks considerably more like peanut butter than jelly, but Smucker’s should remain uninvolved. She concludes with oral sex and a spirited Donald Duck impression, proving there is no bodily fluid or cartoon voice beyond her artistic range. Your Child Is Dead, Now Visit My TikTok Shop A TikTok prankster calls a mother while pretending to be an emergency worker who needs help identifying a body. The caller claims a damaged phone contained the mother’s number and suggests her son may be too mangled to recognize—a lighthearted setup for anybody who finds sudden bereavement hilarious. ️ Distorted News Portland Nail Salon Accused of Spreading Finger Herpes A Portland woman is suing PDX Nails, claiming she contracted herpes after receiving an acrylic manicure at the salon. The technician allegedly worked without gloves, used an electric nail drill and finished with a hand massage involving lotion or oil. Japanese Man Loses $240,000 in Elderly Semen Scam A Japanese man in his seventies believed a woman wanted to pay approximately $57,000 for his sperm. The proposition moved online to a supposed lawyer, who introduced confidentiality fees, frozen-bank-account problems and other obstacles standing between Grandpa and his lucrative ejaculation. The man was instructed to purchase prepaid electronic gift cards and send the numbers to the people supposedly arranging the semen transaction. Florida Substitute Teacher Says the Student Started It A 60-year-old Florida substitute teacher was arrested after allegedly kicking a student with disabilities during a classroom behavioral episode. The student had arrived late, refused to sit down and reportedly attempted to poke classmates with a pencil. Witnesses say substitute teacher Brian shoved the student into a chair, planted his hands on a table and announced, “The gloves are off!”

  5. 6d ago

    Doctors Peel Hardened Vaseline From Homemade Super-Dicks

    Prefer to listen? Play the latest episode below. Episode Summary Mead surrenders his aging obsession to God and immediately sends six more emails about looking young, Galileo builds a frat-boy rape militia, an Australian murderer demands his human right to Vegemite, and doctors peel petroleum jelly out of homemade super-dicks. Super Duper Opening Chaos A […] The post Doctors Peel Hardened Vaseline From Homemade Super-Dicks first appeared on Distorted View Daily.

  6. Oct 19 • Subscribers Only

    There's A Penis Hiding in My Eagle Tattoo! - SIDESHOW

    Episode Summary Mead unveils an antisemitic new character, Whitney Lynn declares spiritual war on “Chipolte,” two elderly men trade disability and diabetes insults, a woman reviews semen perfume, and Wyoming finally earns its place in the Distorted News hall of shame with an eagle tattoo hiding a penis. Mead Skelton’s Newest Character Mead Skelton expands his dramatic universe with Harry Shekelstein, a Jewish stereotype assembled from fake eyebrows, a large nose and approximately three seconds of creative thought. Harry joins Harry Kawasaki and Mead’s standard Black character, Tyrone, in a roster of impressions designed to make community theater look culturally sensitive. Mead opens the routine by claiming Harry’s parents survived the Holocaust and are now in their 120s. Subtlety has once again been escorted from the building. Whitney Lynn Versus Satanic Chipotle Whitney Lynn, previously removed from an airplane for preaching nonstop, returns to harass hungry people at a mall food court. Whitney repeatedly pronounces Chipotle as “Chipolte,” immediately destroying whatever credibility her burrito-based sermon might have possessed. She claims the restaurant is summoning spirits in its Halloween advertising and warns customers that witchcraft is lurking somewhere between the guacamole and brown rice. Senior-Citizen Fight Club Two elderly men nearly come to blows while waiting in line, although the exact location remains trapped somewhere between a shipping counter and a phone store. One combatant wears knee-high socks and carries some extra weight. The other has a prosthetic leg and the confidence of a man who has already sacrificed a limb to the gods of confrontation. Peg Leg accuses Knee-High Socks of skipping the line, having terrible breath and suffering from diabetes and high blood pressure. Spunk: The Semen Fragrance Fragrance reviewer Shelly Has Notes tests Spunk by Feral Parfum, another boutique scent inspired by male genetic material. The perfume opens with black pepper, pink pepper and pineapple before descending into linden blossom, cashmere, ambroxan, wood and the all-important aroma of chlorine. Its official mood board promises clean protein, pineapple juice, hormonally regulated gym sweat, a steam room, a pool party and the boy of your dreams. Tim questions the heavy pepper notes based on his own admittedly limited but not nonexistent semen-tasting résumé. ️ Distorted News The Eagle Tattoo With a Penis on Its Neck Wyoming finally produces a perfect Distorted View story after a listener wondered whether the state had ever appeared on the show at all. Angelina Parkhurst Eagle Alvarado traded use of her bounce house for an eagle-and-feather neck tattoo from artist Ivan Two Bulls. The tattoo honors Alvarado’s Oneida Iroquois heritage and the name Little Eagle, given to her by her grandmother. Alvarado initially loved the eagle, particularly its eye, until her 15-year-old daughter asked why she had a penis tattooed on her neck. ⚰️ Woman Allegedly Fakes Her Death to Escape Fraud Charges Pennsylvania authorities accuse Jennifer Lamer of faking her own death while facing charges connected to fraudulent fundraisers. Investigators say Lamer posed as her sister and sent officials falsified documents, including what appeared to be an obituary from an area funeral home. The supposed sister claimed that Lamer had died on June 1 but could not provide a death certificate, an administrative detail that tends to complicate fictional mortality. Other documents allegedly claimed Lamer was receiving treatment for serious medical conditions, including cancer, but investigators said health-system records did not support those claims.

  7. Oct 19

    Missing Girl’s Skull Became the Pub’s Favorite Ashtray

    Prefer to listen? Play the latest episode below. Episode Summary A feverish Tim powers through a very special Monday featuring sitcom bongs, an allegedly impaired political candidate, corpse abuse, a missing girl’s skull repurposed as pub décor, banana-based filth and the usual deeply regrettable listener interaction. ️ Remembering Papa Nut Ropes of Nut sponsors the […] The post Missing Girl’s Skull Became the Pub’s Favorite Ashtray first appeared on Distorted View Daily.

  8. Oct 16

    Lamb Chop Mops Up Florida Man’s Ropes of Ejaculation

    Prefer to listen? Play the latest episode below. Episode Summary Phantom furry pregnancies collide with a filthy stinkhole sermon, Mead Skelton submits photographic evidence of eternal youth, a congressman declares war on cameras, and Florida deploys Lamb Chop against unauthorized ropes of ejaculation. Anonymous Birthday Filth Worship the Stinkhole Mead Skelton’s Fountain of Hair Dye […] The post Lamb Chop Mops Up Florida Man’s Ropes of Ejaculation first appeared on Distorted View Daily.

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4.7
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914 Ratings

About

Distorted View Daily is a dark-comedy podcast covering weird news, strange internet culture, disturbing viral clips, cringe videos, and NSFW stories — A perfect show for fans of adult comedy, bizarre true stories, and the stranger side of online culture. New episodes every weekday.

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