The Human Intimacy Podcast

Humanintimacy
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Intimacy is a fundamental human experience that goes far beyond romantic relationships. Join us as we dive into the deep and multifaceted layers of human connection, exploring everything from friendship and family bonds to self-love and vulnerability. Through thought-provoking conversations with experts, personal stories, and practical advice, we’ll uncover the secrets to nurturing meaningful relationships in a fast-paced digital world. From exploring trust and fostering emotional intimacy to navigating conflicts and rediscovering oneself, we’re here to discover the essence of what it means to truly connect with others and ourselves. Whether you’re seeking to improve your relationships, gain insights into human behaviors, or simply crave a meaningful conversation that enriches your understanding of human connection, you won’t want to miss a single episode of The Human Intimacy Podcast.

  1. 5D AGO

    Emotional Safety After Betrayal: Understanding Emotions, Trauma, and Relationship Healing (Episode 119)

    Emotional Safety After Betrayal: Understanding Emotions, Trauma, and Relationship Healing Podcast Summary In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore the connection between emotional safety, betrayal trauma, emotional regulation, and relationship healing after infidelity or sexual betrayal. Many individuals struggling with betrayal trauma, anxiety, emotional disconnection, or relationship conflict often suppress their true emotions by saying “I’m fine” while internally feeling overwhelmed, hurt, angry, anxious, or emotionally exhausted. In this conversation, Dr. Skinner and MaryAnn discuss why emotional honesty and emotional congruency are essential for rebuilding trust, emotional intimacy, and healthy communication in relationships. The episode examines how shame, emotional shutdown, avoidance, and trauma responses interfere with connection and healing. Listeners will also learn about emotional contagion, nervous system regulation, co-regulation, and the importance of creating emotionally safe relationships where both partners can openly express their feelings without fear of judgment, defensiveness, or rejection. Topics discussed include: Betrayal trauma recovery Healing after infidelity Emotional regulation in relationships Relationship communication skills Emotional safety and trust rebuilding PTSD symptoms after betrayal Emotional disconnection in marriage Co-regulation and nervous system healing Shame and emotional shutdown Understanding contradictory emotions after betrayal Emotional intelligence and self-awareness How unresolved emotions impact intimacy and connection Whether you are recovering from betrayal trauma, struggling with emotional intimacy, or trying to strengthen communication in your relationship, this episode provides practical insights into understanding emotions, rebuilding trust, and creating deeper human connection. Resources Mentioned in This Episode Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman A foundational book on emotional awareness, emotional regulation, empathy, and developing healthier relationship skills. The Choice by Edith Eger Discusses emotional healing, resilience, trauma recovery, and understanding core emotional experiences. The work of Brené Brown Especially her research on vulnerability, shame, emotional connection, and authentic relationships. Stephen Porges and Polyvagal Theory Understanding nervous system regulation, emotional safety, co-regulation, and trauma responses in relationships. Thich Nhat Hanh Referenced for his teachings on deep listening, mindfulness, emotional presence, and compassionate communication. Al Siebert Concepts on resiliency, emotional flexibility, and the “both/and” approach to emotional experiences. The Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) Course A structured framework designed to help couples heal from betrayal trauma, rebuild emotional safety, improve communication, and strengthen intimacy. Human Intimacy Resources and Courses Human Intimacy Additional Resources for Betrayal Trauma & Relationship Healing Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller Understanding attachment styles, emotional needs, and relationship dynamics. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk A leading resource on trauma, nervous system responses, emotional regulation, and healing. Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson A guide to emotional bonding, attachment, and strengthening relationships after emotional injuries. Addo Therapy & Recovery Resources Therapy, betrayal trauma recovery support, couples counseling, anxiety treatment, mindfulness resources, and emotional healing support.

    37 min

  2. MAY 13

    Sex After Betrayal: Navigating Sexuality, Safety, and Connection (Episode #118)

    Sex After Betrayal: Navigating Sexuality, Safety, and Connection In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and Marianne Michaelis explore one of the most confusing and emotionally charged topics couples face after betrayal: sexuality after discovery. Why do some couples stop having sex entirely while others become more sexual after betrayal? What does it mean if a betrayed partner still desires intimacy? And how do couples navigate sexuality in ways that are emotionally safe and healthy? Together, they discuss the impact betrayal has on sexual desire, emotional bonding, pornography, hypersexuality, shame, and the confusion many individuals feel surrounding intimacy after discovery. The conversation introduces the concept of “sexual self-mastery” and emphasizes the importance of awareness, communication, emotional safety, and intentionality in rebuilding intimacy. This episode offers compassionate guidance for individuals and couples trying to better understand their sexuality, emotions, and relationship dynamics during recovery and healing. Resources Mentioned The Betrayal Bond by Patrick Carnes Sensate-focused therapy concepts Sexual self-mastery Emotional regulation and communication skills Pornography and relational intimacy research HumanIntimacy.com

    34 min

  3. MAY 6

    Why Can’t I Stop Thinking About the Affair? Understanding Rumination, Triggers, and Healing After Betrayal (Episode #117)

    Why Can’t I Stop Thinking About the Affair? Understanding Rumination, Triggers, and Healing After Betrayal In this important episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore one of the most common and painful questions after betrayal: “Why can’t I stop thinking about it?” Together, they unpack the neuroscience and emotional reality behind rumination, intrusive thoughts, PTSD responses, triggers, and nervous system dysregulation after sexual betrayal and affairs. The conversation helps both betrayed and betraying partners understand why the mind and body struggle to “move on,” even when logic says the relationship may be improving. Dr. Skinner and MaryAnn discuss how betrayal disrupts safety, attachment, and reality itself, often leaving the betrayed partner feeling emotionally flooded, hypervigilant, and stuck in repetitive thoughts. They also explain how healing requires more than simply stopping behaviors—it involves nervous system regulation, emotional attunement, compassion, consistency, and deeper relational repair. Listeners will also learn practical tools for responding to triggers, including grounding exercises, journaling, movement-based trauma release, self-attunement, parts work, emotional regulation, and therapeutic approaches such as EMDR and ART. This episode offers hope, validation, and practical guidance for anyone struggling with intrusive thoughts after betrayal trauma. Key Topics Covered Why betrayed partners experience rumination and intrusive thoughts PTSD and betrayal trauma responses The difference between logical understanding and nervous system safety Why triggers continue even after behavior stops Emotional flooding and nervous system dysregulation How betraying partners can respond in healing ways Self-compassion and trauma recovery Tools for emotional regulation and trauma release Parts work and self-attunement EMDR, ART, and trauma-informed healing approaches Recovery capital and building support systems Resources Mentioned The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk Brené Brown – research on exhaustion and uncertainty Jill Bolte Taylor – emotional processing concepts Calming the Emotional Storm by Sheri Van Dijk EMDR Therapy (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) ART (Accelerated Resolution Therapy) Polyvagal Theory by Stephen Porges Internal Parts Work / Self-Attunement Approaches Recovery Capital framework Human Intimacy Podcast episode on Empathy vs. Compassion Upcoming Course Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) — 12 Week Course Join Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis for the upcoming Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) course beginning May 7th. The course is designed to help couples heal from betrayal trauma through a structured process focused on: Safety Emotional regulation Accountability How to measure and create relational repair Compassion Rebuilding intimacy Learn More & Register: The Intimacy Repair Method (12-Week Online Course)

    35 min

  4. APR 29

    Crucial Moments: How Couples Can Navigate Triggers Without Destroying Connection (Episode #116)

    Crucial Moments: How Couples Can Navigate Triggers Without Destroying Connection Episode Overview What happens when a trigger hits in your relationship—and everything escalates? In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis break down what they call “crucial moments”—those intense emotional experiences where couples either move toward healing or fall back into painful patterns. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in the same argument, feeling unheard, or overwhelmed by emotional reactions, this episode will help you understand why those patterns happen—and how to change them. Why Triggers Feel So Overwhelming When a trigger hits, your brain shifts into survival mode. The amygdala activates, your nervous system becomes dysregulated, and your ability to communicate effectively drops. This is why: Conversations escalate quickly You repeat the same arguments You feel misunderstood or dismissed Your partner becomes defensive or shuts down Key Insight: You cannot create connection when your body is in a fight-or-flight state. The Missing Step in Relationship Repair Most couples try to fix the relationship while they’re emotionally flooded. Dr. Skinner emphasizes a critical principle: Stabilize yourself first. Then engage your partner. Without emotional regulation, even the best communication tools won’t work. Common Mistakes Couples Make During Conflict Many couples unknowingly reinforce disconnection during triggers. Watch for these patterns: 1. Marathon Conversations Trying to resolve everything in one conversation while both partners are overwhelmed 2. Defensiveness Disguised as Empathy Statements like: “I didn’t mean to hurt you” “I’m sorry you feel that way” These often feel minimizing instead of supportive 3. Relying Only on Your Partner for Regulation Expecting your partner to calm you down when they may also be triggered 4. Repeating the Same Cycle Having the same argument over and over without new tools or awareness How to Respond in Triggered Moments (What Actually Works) 1. Pause and Regulate Before responding, ask yourself: Am I emotionally stable right now? Is my body calm enough to have this conversation? If not, step away and regulate first. 2. Use Outside Support Sometimes your partner is not the right person in that moment to help you regulate. Consider: A trusted friend A support group A mentor or sponsor This can help you return to the conversation with clarity. 3. Shift from Reactivity to Curiosity Instead of reacting, try: “Help me understand what you’re experiencing” “Tell me more about what you’re feeling” This lowers defensiveness and builds connection. 4. Take Responsibility for Your Emotional Response Your emotions are valid—but how you express them matters. Healthy communication includes: Emotional honesty Self-awareness Respectful expression Understanding the Power Struggle in Relationships After betrayal or disconnection, couples often fall into power imbalances: One partner holds information or control The other feels uncertain, hurt, or reactive True healing requires moving away from: “One-up / one-down” dynamics And toward: Mutual honesty, vulnerability, and accountability Why Some Couples Stay Stuck for Years If you feel like you’re not making progress, it’s often due to: Incomplete or staggered disclosure Lack of emotional regulation skills Repeating patterns without addressing root issues Avoiding deeper vulnerability Key Insight: Without new skills, the same patterns will continue—no matter how much you talk. A Better Way Forward Healing doesn’t come from saying more—it comes from learning how to show up differently. That includes: Regulating your nervous system Communicating with clarity and compassion Practicing new patterns consistently Building emotional safety over time Key Takeaways You cannot be relational when you are emotionally dysregulated Personal stabilization is the foundation of relationship repair Triggers require skillful responses, not reactive ones Both partners play a role in creating change Progress comes from practice, not just insight Resources Mentioned in This Episode Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) Course Emotional Regulation & Nervous System Awareness Structured Disclosure Process Role Play Practice for Communication Skills Call to Action If your relationship feels stuck in repetitive conflict, you don’t have to keep guessing. The Intimacy Repair Method Course provides a step-by-step process to help couples: Rebuild trust Improve communication Create lasting emotional connection 📩 Have questions or topics you’d like us to cover? Email: info@humanintimacy.com

    33 min

  5. APR 22

    How Do You Know You’re Making Progress After Betrayal? Understanding Safety, Awareness, and Real Change (Episode #115)

    How Do You Know You’re Making Progress After Betrayal? Understanding Safety, Awareness, and Real Change In this episode of The Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn explore one of the most common—and emotionally loaded—questions couples ask after betrayal: *“How do we know if we’re actually making progress?”* Healing doesn’t follow a straight line. Many couples feel stuck in a painful cycle of “two steps forward, three steps back,” leaving them wondering if anything is truly changing. Dr. Skinner and MaryAnn break down what real progress looks like—not through checklists or surface behaviors, but through a deeper, more meaningful shift: **perceived relational safety**. They discuss how the body plays a central role in detecting safety through what is often called a “gut feeling,” drawing on concepts like neuroception from Stephen Porges. Listeners will learn why healing requires more than logical reassurance—and why the nervous system must begin to *feel* safe before true connection can return. Through a powerful role-play, they demonstrate the difference between reactive, defensive conversations and regulated, productive ones. This real-life example highlights how self-awareness, emotional regulation, and vulnerability can transform conflict into connection. They also address: Why some betrayed partners struggle to trust even when their partner is “doing everything right” The impact of shock versus gradual awareness in discovery How deception can distort one’s internal sense of safety Why stabilization must come before meaningful repair How consistency—not perfection—builds trust over time Ultimately, progress is not measured by the absence of conflict, but by how couples navigate it. When both partners develop awareness of their internal experiences and learn to communicate those experiences safely, healing becomes not only possible—but measurable. If you’ve ever questioned whether your relationship is moving forward, this episode offers clarity, validation, and a roadmap for what real progress actually looks like. Key Resources & Mentions The Intimacy Repair Method (IRM)   A structured approach to healing after betrayal, focusing on safety, stabilization, and rebuilding connection. Perceived Relational Safety Scale (PRSS)   A practical assessment tool to help individuals and couples measure how safe they feel in the relationship and track progress over time. Polyvagal Theory & Neuroception – Polyvagal Theory   Developed by Stephen Porges, this framework explains how the nervous system detects safety or threat and influences connection and emotional regulation. HumanIntimacy.com   Access courses, assessments, and resources to support healing and relationship repair. 12-Week Intimacy Repair Course   A guided program with role-plays, assessments, and step-by-step instruction to help couples rebuild trust and connection. --- Key Takeaway Progress isn’t about doing everything perfectly—it’s about creating consistent, safe, and honest interactions where both partners can begin to feel, not just think, that change is happening.

    36 min

  6. APR 15

    Introducing the Intimacy Repair Method: A New Path to Healing, Connection, and Lasting Change (Episode #114)

    Introducing the Intimacy Repair Method: A New Path to Healing, Connection, and Lasting Change What if the reason your relationship feels stuck isn’t a lack of effort—but a lack of a clear model for connection? In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner (LMFT-S) and MaryAnne Michaelis, LCSW introduce the Intimacy Repair Method (IRM)—a comprehensive, research-informed framework designed to help individuals and couples rebuild trust, improve communication, and create deeper emotional connection. Drawing from decades of clinical experience and integrating leading models like Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), and Polyvagal Theory, Dr. Skinner explains why most people were never taught how to build healthy relationships—and how that gap continues to impact us today. You’ll learn: Why most people rate their relationship models growing up below a 5 out of 10 The foundational role of safety in all meaningful connection How generational patterns shape communication, conflict, and intimacy The phases of the Intimacy Repair Method, including assessment, stabilization, and relational repair Why understanding your nervous system responses is key to transforming conflict How personalized assessments can guide real, measurable change in your relationship Whether you’ve experienced betrayal, feel disconnected, or simply want a stronger relationship, this episode offers a clear roadmap forward. Resources Mentioned Core Resources Human Intimacy Website (Course + Registration): https://www.humanintimacy.com Upcoming Course: Intimacy Repair Method – 12-Week Live Webinar Experience Start Date: May 7, 2026 Includes: Personalized relationship assessments Weekly live Q&A sessions Role-play practice scenarios Ongoing access to recordings and materials Key Concepts & Models Referenced Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) – A structured pathway for relational healing and growth Perceived Relational Safety – Feeling emotionally safe, open, and secure in your relationship Polyvagal Theory – Understanding how your nervous system drives connection, conflict, and safety Gottman Method – Research-based insights on communication and conflict patterns Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – Attachment-based approach to strengthening emotional bonds Zeigarnik Effect – How unresolved issues keep relationships stuck Differentiation – Developing a strong sense of self while staying connected in relationships Assessments Mentioned Self-Assessment (Individual Awareness) “Test Your Relationship” Assessment Provides up to 90 pages of personalized feedback Identifies strengths, breakdowns, and actionable next steps Key Takeaway Most people aren’t failing in relationships because they don’t care—they’re struggling because they were never shown how to succeed. The Intimacy Repair Method offers a clear, structured way to learn what works—and finally create the connection you’ve been looking for.

    35 min

  7. APR 8

    Hope After Betrayal: Is Healing Your Relationship Still Possible? (Episode #113)

    Hope After Betrayal: Is Healing Your Relationship Still Possible? After betrayal, many couples quietly wonder: Is there any real hope for us? In this powerful episode, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore what hope actually looks like in the aftermath of sexual betrayal—and why so many people struggle to find it. Drawing from decades of clinical experience, they discuss the reality behind discouraging statistics, the isolation many betrayed partners feel, and why healing often requires more than just good intentions. They introduce a critical shift: hope is not built through words alone, but through new patterns, emotional regulation, and learning how to stay present in the hardest moments. You’ll also hear: Why many couples stay stuck in repeating emotional “loops” How shame and defensiveness block true repair The danger of trying to heal in isolation—or relying on the wrong sources What actually creates change: principles, skills, and consistent application Why healing is possible—even if the relationship doesn’t survive Whether you’re fighting for your relationship or trying to rebuild your life after it, this episode offers a grounded, honest message: 👉 Hope is real—but it’s built through learning, practice, and connection.

    32 min

  8. APR 1

    The Courage to Heal: Facing Pain, Shame, and Change Together (Episode #112)

    The Courage to Heal: Facing Pain, Shame, and Change Together Episode Summary In this episode of the Human Intimacy Podcast, Dr. Kevin Skinner and Marianne Michaelis explore the many forms of courage required in the healing process—both individually and as a couple. Courage is not just about staying in a relationship after betrayal. It’s about facing pain, telling the truth, asking for help, and being willing to see yourself clearly. It’s the courage to slow down when emotions are overwhelming, to remain present in difficult conversations, and to confront shame rather than avoid it. Dr. Skinner and Marianne highlight how healing is not just emotional—it is deeply biological. When individuals feel shame or fear, their nervous system becomes activated, making it difficult to stay grounded and connected. True courage, then, is learning how to regulate those internal responses so that meaningful repair can happen. Through powerful metaphors—including riding through dark tunnels, wearing the wrong “lens,” and learning to ride a backwards bike—they illustrate how healing requires patience, intentionality, and repeated effort. Change often feels unnatural at first, but with practice, new patterns can emerge. Ultimately, this episode invites listeners to reflect on one essential question: Where do I need courage right now? Healing is not about perfection—it’s about continuing forward, even when the path is unclear.   Key Takeaways Healing from betrayal requires multiple forms of courage—not just endurance, but self-awareness and vulnerability Shame is both emotional and physiological; regulation must come before meaningful connection Slowing down is sometimes more courageous than pushing forward Change feels unnatural at first—like using your non-dominant hand or riding a backwards bike Progress happens through repetition, curiosity, and compassionate self-reflection Each person’s pace is different—comparison can disrupt healing Resources & References Human Intimacy Resources Human Intimacy Website (Courses & Conference Access): https://www.humanintimacy.com 2026 Human Intimacy Conference (Recordings Available): Available under “Courses” after creating a free account Contact for Questions: info@humanintimacy.com Concepts & Influences Mentioned Intimacy Repair Method (IRM) – Dr. Kevin Skinner Polyvagal Theory – Dr. Stephen Porges Shame & Vulnerability Research – Brené Brown Interpersonal Neurobiology – Dr. Dan Siegel EMDR & Trauma Processing Models Suggested Viewing The Backwards Brain Bicycle (Learning & Change): A powerful illustration of how difficult it is to rewire learned patterns Reflection Questions for Listeners Where in my life do I need courage right now? What am I avoiding because it feels uncomfortable or overwhelming? When I feel triggered or flooded, how do I typically respond? What would it look like to slow down instead of react? Where have I already demonstrated courage in my healing journey?

    27 min
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Ratings & Reviews

4.6
out of 5
18 Ratings

About

Intimacy is a fundamental human experience that goes far beyond romantic relationships. Join us as we dive into the deep and multifaceted layers of human connection, exploring everything from friendship and family bonds to self-love and vulnerability. Through thought-provoking conversations with experts, personal stories, and practical advice, we’ll uncover the secrets to nurturing meaningful relationships in a fast-paced digital world. From exploring trust and fostering emotional intimacy to navigating conflicts and rediscovering oneself, we’re here to discover the essence of what it means to truly connect with others and ourselves. Whether you’re seeking to improve your relationships, gain insights into human behaviors, or simply crave a meaningful conversation that enriches your understanding of human connection, you won’t want to miss a single episode of The Human Intimacy Podcast.

Information

  • Creator
    Humanintimacy
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    100
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2024 All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    The Human Intimacy Podcast

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